₦airaland Forum

tit:
Kano election is not free and fair.
too much intimidation and rigging by boko haram criminal elements!

Jiga is going to cancel the elections
or remove all the invalid votes!

Hope you have seen this from bauchi?

https://www.nairaland.com/2225541/somewhere-bauchi-nigeriadecide2015


You can judge who the chief rigger is

Someone just send this to me now. This happened somewhere in Bauchi according to




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UwUkcYTGL2s

Floodgater:
Ruuudboy, i hope with all these posts trying to make you feel like a 'sissy' you wont end up becoming something other than the good husband you are. Your wife actions were very bad. From what you said, you know silent treatment gets to her hence you use it to a fault even when you were wrong and saw from her attitude, you carried on like normal instead of apologising for not calling only to ignore when she gave attitude. From your post, the way she attacked you says she prefare you beating her to your usual ignore (though thats not what she really wanted). You saw that she calmed down the moment you decided to talk/communicate and not ignore. Since she is has promised not to repeat dont send or report her anymore to parents. Please be open to her in every way, communicate instead of ignore like most men as you can see it brings the worst in her unlike most women, finally always reassure her you wont cheat on her to kill the insecurity and build a trust for you. I want to believe you love her and that she has good qualities too, give her benefit of doubt again and love her once more. Firmly tell her again you wont tolerate a repeat, dont report her again after forgiving her as she may resent you for not being man enough.

Thankz so much.....i tried as much as possible to be straightforward cos relationship not built on trust will definitely crumble.
Sincerely, communication has never been an issue but u no sometimes after a rough day u just want to relax your brain before delving into other things at home. My routine has always been from work to house on a daily basis. The latest i come home averagely is between 5-6pm and my weekend is always with my famiky. I dont have friends that i hang around with nor drink to warrant spending tym outside. She's 95% sure of all my movement just that she's always sceptical based on some guys parol she was exposed to before marriage
i was raised in a separate family before my father died and ever since i got married and up till now,the advice i get from my mum is to always learned from their own mistake that if she had known then,she would have done everytyn possible to make her marriage work rather that go the way of divorce with my dad....... That have always been working on cos even if i call her today and she asked abt my wife, she will still give the advice that i should always do everything within my power to make my marriage work and never attempt separation in order not to be like them. More reason why i cant even report her to my mum cos they are very close and it will get her thinking abt their own past mistakes.

my wife had married working class male as friends and brothers before we got married and most of them do runs out of their wedlock which she was aware of all their antics. According to her way back then, some of them dated her friends then. So, that has always been at the back of her mind and she always make reference to it sometimes (karma things).

 

This week has been a very busy one for me at work, i came home late than usual. Yesterday (one of the few craziest day i had at work) was so late that i came home around to 9pm unlike my usual 5-6pm. She close from her own office around 4pm. I only picked her call around afternoon which i told her i was a bit busy and i couldnt talk to her later and i never bothered to call as i was so tired.

i came home and she gave me attitude which i ignored even while i tried to greet her and assumed its normal. I had some report to send to my boss that night cos that was the excuse i gave before he allowed me leave office. I realised i should have explained somethings and why i came home late but i jst concentrated on my fone trying to sort out my report on my ipad. She was just ranting all around saying the one i did outside was not enough, i came home and still continued with my phone chatting with some i.diot girls whereas i was chatting with my boss and colleagues.

i later went outside to buy recharge card after i couldn't recharge with my mobile banking app. I was on the phone with my boss which made me stay a bit more outside but i guess she has been trying my number which was busy..........This got her infuriated as she locked the door and started, i was just looking at her trying to explain things but she wouldnt allow me....saying it was friday and i was definitely  with someone while she was calling me and i claimed i was in the office and ignored her.....wat i did in the office was enough  that i still went outside to make calls, i just kept quiet as shstarted talking. Her ranting  got to me that i felt if i should respond with how boiling i was, it will definitely  be something  else cos of the day stress , i had to keep quiet for her as we cant ve ralking at the same time.......i didnt know my being silent will lead to attack...

BE811APP:
First tell me the crime u committed first b4 ur wife will act like that...

For u to run to another room... U must have fvcked up... U slept with someone abi

Nonetheless, I bilv u got wat u deserved..
My wife won't slap me..

slept with someone ke? Nah........Everly faithful to my wife

Kirinwa:
Op you didn't stand up to her nonsense but rather locked yourself inside the room? Jeez.

She still banged on the door probably to finish you off.
Is it obvious some nuts were loose

You had to beg?

That was the only option cos are action will definitely lead to embarrassment if i didnt do dat. We have been staying on my estate over a year, have never heard of husband and wife fighting with neighbours separating them.so, mine shouldnt be the first in the neighborhood

sexybash:
If I were you
After a week that she has forgotten
I will tell her let's travel to see her parents
As we reach I will just tell her parents to read train her
Before she would say jack another woman has moved in no time for radarada

Even in marriage there are boundaries you should not cross

Most people forget to set those boundaries

If na me by this morning dem go think say na train jam her
Rubbish

Even though i hardly discuss my marriage issue with people, i called her dad this afternoon to explain what happened. He was surprised and later talk to her including her mum

I know it could have been worse reporting her to my own parent

alutacontinua:
You need a separation from that woman.

1. That woman fit hit you with stick or land table or bottle on your head one day.
2. When a woman raises her hand to slap a man, all atom-and I mean every single grain of respect is gone in that marriage. My people call it 'see finish', and you ain't getting that respect back anytime soon.
3. The fact that this is her second time means she'll most likely keep doing it till Jesus comes.
This is one situation where I'll say you probably need to send her back to her father for some retraining (like coogar will say)

separation? ....never thought of dat cos to me, marriage is not a boyfriend /girlfriend relationship.
what will the nxt person do if i divorce her and marry another woman?

Gifted4all:
Silent treatment is better

the silent treatment was actually what infuriated her......according to her, she was talking,instead of me 2 respond and settle things, i just kept quiet which she was tired of and needed us to settle things asap

nikkyshyne:
But you can abuse english abi?

bad geh

We have always heard about husband abusing their wives. How is it always like, the other way round? I have never laid my hand on any lady before not to talk of my wife and i don't think i can do such.

As a husband how do you handle it if your wife lay her hand on you either by slapping,punching,biting or rough handling? As a wife, how did your husband handle the situation?

I have been married to my wife going to 4yrs now and yesterday was the second time we had misunderstanding that led to serious confrontation.....Initially when it all started around 9pm, i kept quiet and didnt respond to her ranting. When she realized i wasn't responding, she moved close to me, started punching me, bit me and somehow slapped me in the process with serious ranting "you'll kill me today."

I tried as much as not to retaliate and removed myself from her, ran to the visitors room and locked myself in there....she continued talking and started hitting the door with a stick, after which i realized that with the way things are going, neighbours on the next flat might want to come and asked what was wrong, which i do much detest.

I started begging her from inside after which she calmed down and i opened the door.....we talked it through till late in d night and settled our differences which she later apologised for raising her hand on me and promised never to do that again no matter what happened.

The issue now is, i put myself in another man's shoe that how do people handle things like this in marriage as a husband?

As a wife, how did your husband handle issues of misunderstanding? The first thing that came to my mind yesterday when she hit me was the word of my boss who always say, AT THE HIGHEST POINT OF PROVOCATION, ALWAYS EXERCISE CAUTION.

Married peeps, how do u handle this?

(Matured mind only)........As a guy or lady, how do you fight insecurity in your marriage/relationship........

How do you help your partner against being insecured

ammamat: just tell her what you told us here

Oohk.....thankz

Tallesty1: The hand writing is very clear bro.

@Op. Everybody is reponsible for their destiny and should take the responsibilty for their actions. Don't allow anybody to blame you for anything. That said, please don't get too close to her(she started with tears, which is a huge trap, no sane man will like to hurt a woman who is already crying. She then blamed you for her troubles, which is another huge trap. She wants to put you in confusion and slip into your life while are you are still wondering what's your sin). I repeat, don't get close to her. Married women are the hardest people to get off your neck when they are after you.

Rexnegro: Politely remind her , her words and her actions..eg my parent won't give their blessing, she can't marry outside their clan , u been turned down whenever u ask her out...etc etc..then u gat be blunt n truthful with her ...allow her say whatever she want to say..the fact can't be changed now except u still have a sight for her... Bro if u love ur wife n family been truthful n blunt to her will do u good regardless if she will feel bad..u gat be a man ... Goodluck bro if u like go fall my hand ...

Harbosede02: Nawa ooo,nawa ooo,haha,nawa ooo
dat lady is devil sent,she said u treated ha badly,tell ha sorry,bt if she tells you dat u guys sud meet becos i knw she wud eventually suggest dat,tell ha shez mad!!mind u,try nt to get close to ha,hurt ha feelings bt don't destroy ur marriage#shikena

What kind of feelings will i have to someone that is married? I cant even imagine getting close or try to see her. Also i cant betray the trust of my wife nor risk the family am building cos of her

Initially, i thought maybe she needed some kind of help or something but i was confuse when she dropped the bombshell yesterday.....All i was saying was "am sorry for everything" till i told her we should talk tomorrow.

Just looking for a way to set the record straight without hurting her as she has even been calling me since morning but have not pick.

domwas2: Guy to be frank with Ʋ, to me from ur write up, Ʋ seems to be a straight & deceit guy, and dis is one of δ small/ little issue if not handle properly will live to regret for δ rest of life...
Pls just be straight wit her, bye gone is bye gone, Ʋ are married now & Ʋ are not ready to betray ur wife bcs what ℓ̊ see here is trying to get emotional with Ʋ,women do that when they shed tears and try involve ur wit into ur relationship bcs if she found out later she might think otherwise Ʋ are cheat on her wit ur Ex. Dat Ʋ know really hurts.
Moreover, just be straight abt δ whole thing bcs all this happend for a purpose and remember she is a married woman now- if Ʋ try do her δ same will be done to Ʋr wife...' Same cain will be use on Ʋ' that ℓ̊ believe is life.
Enjoy.

Cheating on my wife is the last thing that will never happen. I told my wife about this girl while we were courting but have not mentioned it to her that she's been calling me

andromida: Mischief maker. It seems you still have some feelings for her maybe a tiny weeny one because of this i feel you should talk to your wife before you start daydreaming of a long gone past and what could have been. From your story i cannot see how you hurt her don't fall into her trap of tears stop picking her calls,block her on face book and continue to enjoy the wife of your youth. If you must call her tell her you cannot continue with the contact because it seems she wants you to do something about her pains and you have no idea how you can help her direct her steps back to the Lord and her husband for healing.

Do not fall victim to any frustrated married woman. Na she know wetin dey worry her.

Thanks for your advice. Sincerely, there's no any iota of feelings again other than just childhood friend.

Presently we are separated by long distance of inter states and i don't even think anytyn is possible again. Just dont want to sound too harsh on her with my response

LaurelP: You can't do anything until she has told you your crime. So ask her what she means by you breaking her heart cos from wat u wrote here, she's d one who broke your heart.

She came out straight that i dumped her and got married to someone she doesn't love

I need an advice urgently…………….

In order not to bore you with long stories………….There was this girl I met while growing up during our lesson days in JSS1, she stays like 3 street to my street and we attended different secondary school….The connection between us flourished immediately and we were so fond of each other even though I never asked her out deep inside us it was as if we were dating (That kind of childish play).

Friends were jealous and always convince me she was not a good girl but I never look back, this continue until we finished secondary school…I asked her out afterwards and she said she cant date me because her parent will not give their consent, moreover they’ve warned her that she shouldn’t marry outside her clan. It was a disappointment that evening, but I never forced it as I don’t want that to jeopardize our relationship………….I tried again after a while, the answer was still NO but our friendship continued just like it was before as if we were dating……………everybody around us believed we were in a relationship, I believed we were in a relationship but she said NO to my advancement.

We both gained admission into different university in the same state, every time am home, she do come over, we spend a lot of quality time together and things were a bit rosy between us…During that time I believed we were in a relationship as we do romance whenever we are alone but NO SEX whatsoever. I never asked her out again afterwards with the aim that we just see how things come up between us.

She do come to visit me in school once in a while but never slept over before and there was no SEX…I had a girlfriend then and I also believe she had someone then but my mind was out of a relationship as she once told me she can never marry outside her clan. The last time I visited her in school, I slept over, we talked about so many things regarding our future and what we want to achieve in life but still yet we never talk about our relationship. It was even a surprise that we didn’t romance or sleep on the same bed till I left that day.

Fast forward to when I graduated from university and went for service, they moved out of our area so I learnt after I came back from service. So many things happened that all my thought was how to get a good job and be someone in life. I have a good and steady relationship so I never bothered to call her again and she never called. My mind was out of her already as she was a no go area relationship wise. I lost her contact in between the line and she never called me too.

I got a Job like four years ago and lost my relationship….my job relocated me to another state, I searched for her on facebook and all social website but she was no where but I was fortunate enough to get her number through someone. I called her up one day and she was surprised told her about my job and her response was that “that organization! That doesn’t know more than sacking people anyhow”….i asked her what she meant and even if they sack people anyhow, she want them to sack me too? We talk for long and in between our discussion, I heard the voice of a baby crying, asked if that was her baby and she said yes…..SHE’S MARRIED.
It was a something else after the call that I had to delete her on my phone as that was the only way to forget about her. I moved on with my life and gave other ladies chance in my life. THANK GOD NOW AM MARRIED TO MY WIFE.

The problem now is, this lady sent me a friend request on facebook lastweek, I accepted, check through her profile to see her family pictures and children. I guess she must have seen mine too as my status is married and my family pictures are on my facebook page.

She called two days after, I was surprised…she asked about my welfare and family and I did same too as she now has two kids, then she said we need to talk about something important and wouldn’t mind if I can call her when am less busy. I promised to call her later in the day after work. I eventually called her later in the evening and her response was not so smooth, we ended the call. She called back later and said she was with her husband eating while I called so she couldn’t relate with me normal. Told her am also with my wife that same period and I don’t think it will be ideal for me to discuss with her for long as my time at home belongs to my wife alone. She ended the call

Over the past one week, she has been calling but I never picked as I don’t have that luxury of time to hear her out most times. Then saw her missed call again yesterday and decided to call her back in the evening. She started crying that what was her offence that I treated her the way I did, I asked how and she said I broke her heart, I made her suffer, she looked for me everywhere, she asked of me but I was no where….i made her go through pains and all sort. Why did I behave that way to her? If she had ever for once told me that she’s no more interested? If we fought before we lost contact………….she was just crying.
I calm her down and asked if we can talk about this tomorrow (today). She said yes and will expect my call. Am confused on how to talk to her in order not to hurt her feelings or make her feel bad.

PLS HOW SHOULD I HANDLE THIS WITHOUT HURTING HER

Wealthyone you are so amazing and ur kind is rare....u're all I desire in a lady...all I need is a YES

Ishilove: Goodness! So you've actually spoken to it?
The last time it happened to me, when I was able to shake it off and lift my head, I heard footsteps running away outside my window. It happened around 1.30 am, four years ago in Ondo state. But none of them have ever hung around long enough for me to see them clearly or have a conversation like you did. They dare not.
padeolu, you had a serious witchcraft attack and you need to start taking your spiritual life more seriously.

I guess only those that experienced this before will b able 2 understand d op.....it has happened 2 me like 3 times in the past and its the same experience, the spirit only leaves the moment u call God's name...
I remembered the last tym it came during d night, I opened my eyes in d midnight and saw the shadow by the door, I quickly close my eyes and couldnt ulter a word until it moved towards me and started rubbing hand and pinching all my body while I was shaking and praying deep inside me......until after 30mins when it lifted me up fully from the bed before I was able to call God's name and shouted......he dropped me instantly and had a dislocated arm........

All is just d glory of God and serious prayer.....