₦airaland Forum

A police officer sent a wrong signal to a horney horse in the united states of America when the police officer bent over at event.
it took another police officer to rescue the exposed officer from the rod of the horney horse.
Analyst says the horse should be named after 2pac,the famous rapper for saying he would literally f**k a police officer.





I think this horse has been into human sex lately hence that attempt.... what do you think guys?





lalasticlala oo

AngryNigerian:
...abeg, i de angry; nò de make me laff

ohk

AngryNigerian:
Lolzzzz...go jiooor! U no de bring light

GO n do this in your generator

AngryNigerian:
Plsss, this thread is closed! No more comments, or...

agbaya...I am ready for you all today, since I nor fit express my self with my MB

lekkie073:
change ur moniker to sirmugu

... one spotted

Yes!
I ought to be the richest nairalander, possibly the highest paid nairalander if and only if Oga SEUN was paying for the number of persons I introduced to nairaland that are now NL die hard fans.
They now sleep and wake nairalanding even more than INTROVERT and co. Enough traffic has been generated for SEUN to make money with my information at the expense of my MB and yet I don't have job,in addition with the insult from fellow NLrs, at times because they don't agree with what I believe (when I write or comment on a post),and also my posts & comments on which I take responsibility for as clearly stated in NL's terms and conditions ought to have given me some privileges in NL, because I am a responsible young man at least.
EVEN AS I MAKE THIS POST SOME PEOPLE WILL INSULT ME....Shouldn't I rewarded for that?
.
.
.
Oga SEUN,please do something about this.
No be only bind you go dy do for me.

lalasticlala hmmmm

Diddyydiva:
I wonder ooooo

at least I would know,and be free with her. you know what they say about old firewood also know if the man is now far from her

mummydirect:
Common, not a fair question to ask, let the past remain in the past please.

what if the man thought she was a virgin before the marriage only to find out she isn't after the marriage.

Bearing in mind that He couldn't also ask her if she was a virgin during their courtship because the man thought it was a silly question to ask

from experience when I was in the world I can tell you this;
the babe never baff n she was scared that her pussycat may have been oozing and as lacks the confidence of telling you that she need to wash up as you also lacked the patient by walking her out of your room.
All said and done I must say both of you need Jesus as some of NL have rightly said so that you can become like me

please nairalanders,I want to know if it is right to ask one's wife the man she gave her virginity to,if you didn't meet her as a Virgin

banttieman:
No single paragraph.
So undesiring to peruse.

the message it conveys is what is important thks anyway for the criticism

SOME STRONG AFRICAN INTRIGUING AFRICAN PROVERBS... 1. The anger of a penis doesn't destroy the vagina (Zimbabwe). 2. There is no virgin in a maternity ward (Cameroon). 3. A child can play with it's mother's breasts but not with the father's testicles (Ghana). 4. The man who marries a beautiful woman and the farmer who grows corn by the road side have the same problem (Ghana). 5. When you see a woman sitting with her legs open, never tell her to close them because you do not know her source of fresh air (Ethiopia). 6. He who says that nothing lasts forever has never tried Hausa perfume (Nigeria). 7. The only woman who knows where her man is every night is a widow (Togo). 8. An erect penis has no conscience (Uganda). 9. If you go to sleep with an itching anus, you are sure to wake up with smelly fingers (Kenya). 10. The day a mosquito lands on your testicles is the day you will know there is a better way of resolving issues without resorting to violence (Ethiopia). ADD THE ONES YOU KNOW TO THE LIST

ARE YOU JESUS? This write up touched my heart. I am sure it will touch yours too. A few years ago a group of salesmen went to a regional sales convention in Chicago .. They had assured their wives that they would be home in plenty of time for Friday night's dinner. In their rush, with tickets and briefcases, one of these salesmen inadvertently kicked over a table which held a display of apples. Apples flew everywhere. Without stopping or looking back, they all managed to reach the plane in time for their nearly-missed boarding... ALL BUT ONE!!! He paused, took a deep breath, got in touch with his feelings and experienced a twinge of compassion for the girl whose apple stand had been overturned. He told his buddies to go on without him, waved good-bye, told one of them to call his wife when they arrived at their home destination and explain his taking a later flight. Then he returned to the terminal where the apples were all over the terminal floor. He was glad he did. The 16-year-old girl was totally blind! She was softly crying, tears running down her cheeks in frustration, and at the same time helplessly groping for her spilled produce as the crowd swirled about her; no one stopping and no one to care for her plight. The salesman knelt on the floor with her, gathered up the apples, put them back on the table and helped organize her display. As he did this, he noticed that many of them had become battered and bruised; these he set aside in another basket. When he had finished, he pulled out his wallet and said to the girl, "Here, please take this $40 for the damage we did. Are you okay?"She nodded through her tears. He continued on with, "I hope we didn't spoil your day too badly." As the salesman started to walk away, the bewildered blind girl called out to him, "Mister...." He paused and turned to look back into those blind eyes. She continued, "Are you Jesus?" He stopped in mid-stride .... and he wondered. He gently went back and said, "No, I am nothing like Jesus - He is good, kind, caring, loving, and would never have bumped into your display in the first place. "The girl gently nodded: "I only asked because I prayed for Jesus to help me gather the apples. He sent you to help me, so you are like Him - only He knows who will do His will. Thank you for hearing His call, Mister." Then slowly he made his way to catch the later flight with that question burning and bouncing about in his soul: "Are you Jesus?" Do people mistake you for Jesus? That's our destiny, is it not? To be so much like Jesus that people cannot tell the difference as we live and interact with a world that is blind to His love, life and grace. If we claim to know Him, we should live, walk and act as He would. Knowing Him is more than simply quoting scripture and going to church. It's actually living the Word as life unfolds day to day. You are the apple of His eye even though you, too, have been bruised by a fall. He stopped what He was doing and picked up you and me on a hill called Calvary and paid in full for our damaged fruit. Please share this, {IF you feel led to do so}.

what's your take? abeg mod

Those with saggy breasts must incorporate exercise in their daily routine. Exercises that target breast tissues and pectoral muscles around the chest can help a lot to add firmness. Some exercises that can effectively lift up and firm sagging breasts are– chest presses and pulls, arm raises, round-about push-ups, and dumbbell flyes. Along with these, there are other types of exercises that you can perform to firm your breasts. Check out this video to learn more. Always wear a supportive or sports bra while exercising.

We all want to remain forever young if possible but it is not. A woman would have preferred if her breasts remain firm and supple for her entire life time. Breast sagging is a natural process that happens with age wherein the breasts lose their suppleness and elasticity. Though saggy breasts usually start happening after a woman reaches 40, it can occur earlier. Apart from age, other factors that cause sagging breasts include breastfeeding, pregnancy, menopause, rapid weight loss or gain, strenuous exercise, nutritional deficiencies and wearing a poorly fitting bra. Some diseases like breast cancer or respiratory conditions like tuberculosis can also cause breasts to sag. Also, excessive consumption of nicotine, alcohol and carbonated beverages can contribute to the problem. Breasts do not have muscle. They are made of fat, connective tissues and milk-producing glands, and they need proper care to keep them in good shape. A wide variety of creams and lotions are available on the market to tighten and tone up sagging breasts. However, if you prefer natural methods, there are many simple and easy home remedies that you can try.

And INEC still want to cancel some LGAs so the killings will continue.... ifaheram INEC better announce the result any how way e be so that this killing will STOP OOO

DON'T THROW STONES in MARKET PLSCES

our thoughts

mod do the needful

dajoaneke:
1. Persuade her to make a choice. Accepting gifts from a man you wont give a chance to is wrong and gives false hopes. God wont like it if you all play with his servant like that.
2. Does your friend have future plans for her or is he a double dater too?
3. Knowing her that much dont you think she's playing your friend by accepting gifts and attention from other men?
4. Do you know she is using you? As mucg as you know her she'll never admit her feelings to you about the pastor. Instead she ensures you get flexed to keep your mouth shut.
5. She's sly, i give it to her. Tell her to face who she prefer and stop all this chewing gum chewing ,shawama

ohk....but she said she wants just the gift and I know she truly loves my friend

I agree with you to some extent

This is one of the best messages I received today, so like to share with you.... 1. No matter how beautiful and handsome you are, just remember Baboon and Gorillas also attract tourists. ***Stop Boasting. 2. No matter how big and strong you are, you will not carry yourself to your Grave. ***Be Humble! 3. No matter how tall you are, you can never see tomorrow. ***Be Patient! 4. No matter how Light Skinned you are, you will always need light in Darkness. ***Take Caution! 5. No matter how Rich and many Cars you have, you will always walk to Bed. ***Be Contented! Take Life Easy Life is "Exp. + Exp. + Exp." Yesterday was Experience. Today is Experiment. Tomorrow is Expectation. So, use your Experience in your Experiment to achieve your Expectations.

A pastor is trying to entice my friend's girlfriend to marry him(pastor) with gifts and this girl is also my friend so she hides nothing from me. we are in the same department and in the same school but her bf is a business man although he also graduated from my school.

should I inform my guy about this?
though the girl said she just wants to play along but I am no more comfortable with the situation since he is a pastor and I don't want God's wrath...


But shall the pastor dey flex me too lol

but I feel I am betraying a friend since I am his eyes in my school here...

please do not crucify me o...
NOTE:The pastor in question is a disciplined man ehm!

[quote author=glimpse33 post=43683278]JAMB 2016 SHOULD NOT BE SCRAPPED/REMARKED...


I Have Been Reading Online Posts On Nairaland, MySchool & Some Other Blogs, And I Kept Seeing Lazy Users Screaming, Calling For The Scrapping Of Jamb 2016.
I Simply Read & Laugh At These Posts.

After This Post, Richiez , olawalebabs , Fynestboi & Lalasticlala Should Stop Paying Attention To Those UnPrepared/ Dull Candidates Calling For The Scrapping Of JAMB 2016. Because, As Far As You Are Intelligent, You Must Definitely beat The Mere 180+ Cutoff Mark, Even If Your Result Was Poorly Marked.


Jamb Has Been In Existence Since 1978. And It Has Been The Only Body Screening Secondary School Leavers Before Post Utme Was Introduced In 2005.


Fast forward To 2015 When CBT Was Fully Introduced, Its Safe To Say That It Was Success. And Now 2016, And I Must Say It Is A Huge Success As Well. For All Those Screaming #RemarkJamb2016 / #ScrabJamb2016, I Am Sorry To Say You All Are Dead Heads, Empty Brain.


Before You Throw Stones At Me. I Also Wrote This Years Jamb And Scored 243, Reason Was That I Prepared 100%. I Got All My Essential Chemistry, Physics, Maths & English Text Books. Plus Downloaded The Syllabus Of Each Subject & Read It Word For Word. (That's The Criteria For Passing JAMB)


I Didn't Rely On Past Questions Like Most Of You Did. I guess That's The Reason Why Y'all Failed. Also, Most Of Y'all Spent All Your Time On Facebook, WhatsApp, Twitter While The Wise Ones Was Busy Preparing.


Plus Those Of You Making Stupid Suggestions On Scrapping Jamb, Meaning Whosoever Passed WAEC Would Just Go And Sit For Post Utme. WTF
WAEC Is The Most Corrupt Exam Body, As SS3 students No Longer Write WAEC By Themselves. They Now Depend On Miracle Centers.


My Advice To Those Who Scored Below 180 In This Years Jamb Exam Is: Quit Most Of Your Online Activities & LOVE Your Book. For God's Sake What Is Wrong With This Indomie Generation


You Guys Are Just Too Lazy To Read. And It Is The Lazy Ones That Are Screaming #ScrapJamb, While The Intelligent Ones (Me Inclusive) Are Already Preparing For Post Utme.



#Peace!

[/font][/i]




MODIFIED:

I Felt That At This moment That Everyone Seems To Be Protesting On
Scrapping Jamb, Some Other Persons Were Favored. What's Going To Be Their
Fate If It Is Eventually Scrapped

OR

What If JAMB 2016 Is Officially Remarked And You Scored Below What You Got Before
[/quote I can bet on this that you don't know what you are blabbing about with my left ball... for your info I am not a jambite but I can tell you that the marking was full of errors especially the first two days

sorry @ poor picture quality

Greg007:
That means my gf is tired?. But u didn't add. Wen you don't have money also. I think that's number 1

Greg007:
That means my gf is tired?. But u didn't add. Wen you don't have money also. I think that's number 1

Greg007:
That means my gf is tired?. But u didn't add. Wen you don't have money also. I think that's number 1

tRuE

LORDSAMURAI:
UR ENGLISH GOT ME CONFUSE.

sorry not good at story telling

Mrbigman1:
Carry ur story go back page.
What's 28 and 29 still doing in school?
PhD or something?

medical school

...and the six Seminarians who met a very
unfortunate end in a car crash are going
home FINALLY. May their souls R.I.P

nagoma:
The Presdential jets were there, bought by former presidents. Buhari didn't buy new ones. What is your suggestion?

He should sell them and fly Arik?

I am not saying he should sell them.
what I'm saying is the tourism industry in other countries are booming because of baba while Nigerians are bubbling and booming in economic crisis and hardship

a close friend of my told me about a guy in his school who just got into a relationship with a girl he just wanted to lick her "beans" and run away but along the line he fell in love with the girl although he met with the girl (29)when her relationship was troubled. some how she broke up with her former boyfriend and started with the boy(28).To cut the long story short her ex wants them back as a matter of fact they back but the girl still want to keep the relationship with him because she is cool the boy... but my guy's guy nor dy fit look another girl face as a matter of fact he had an opportunity to strip one opè but could feel anything for opè(girl) because of the love he is having for this girl...He has even tried to call their relationship an opened one but he still feels hurt whenever she's with the ex but cannot just quit... pls what should he do?


a close friend of my told me about a guy in his school who just got into a relationship with a girl he just wanted to lick her "beans" and run away but along the line he fell in love with the girl although he met with the girl (29)when her relationship was troubled. some how she broke up with her former boyfriend and started with the boy(28).To cut the long story short her ex wants them back as a matter of fact they back but the girl still want to keep the relationship with him because she is cool the boy... but my guy's guy nor dy fit look another girl face as a matter of fact he had an opportunity to strip one opè but could feel anything for opè(girl) because of the love he is having for this girl...He has even tried to call their relationship an opened one but he still feels hurt whenever she's with the ex but cannot just quit... pls what should he do?