₦airaland Forum

*HAD I KNOW
BY
BLESSING ODINIYA
*
*CHAPTER TWO*
It's a cool evening on sunny day and I have an appointment with Maxwell.So I had a shower,put on the most sexy outfit you could ever think of,I applied a simple makeup on my beautiful face(I'm not the makeup type). I'm all set to go catch up the appointment I have with Maxwell.
He directed me to the expensive and quiet restaurant that he was, patiently waiting for me.I went there to meet him and he gladly welcomed me and showed me to the awaiting seat. Not quite long after I sat down chatting happily and eating fried rice and chicken with him,a Waiter from God knows where mistakenly spilled some juice on my dress and I instantly went mad at the poor Waiter; people around there tried to calm me down but I refused to be calmed. Maxwell wanted to say something but I shut him up instantly so he became speechless.
Why did you spilled a drink on my dress,fool. Are you blind or is anything wrong with your sense of reasoning? I shouted on the Waiter who is still begging for my forgiveness.
I'm really sorry,Madam but it wasn't intentional.It was a mistake and I'm sorry,the Waiter said courageously.
Shut up your smelling mouth,dirty pig. What gives you the guts to tell me if it is intentional or unintentional? You this mannerless Waiter,next time......
Sorry for everything,Guy;Maxwell who was Speechless all this while interrupted me and dragged me gently to where his car was parked outside,he pushed me inside the car and drove me to his house.
Bella,I detest your non-chalant attitude with so much passion.You are too rude and proud.You have no little regard for anyone and I don't like that. I love you so much but I hate your behavior,Maxwell poured out his disappointment when we reached home.
I don't care. What did you expect me to do when the senseless Waiter spilled that drink on my dress? Did you expect me to keep quiet and watch him like a dog patiently waiting for a bone? I asked angrily.
That young man there didn't do that to you deliberately. No one knows tomorrow so don't look down on people anyone. You were so rude to that Waiter and it's unfair. Moreover,it's not proper for a lady talking rudely to a man that way,Maxwell said putting all the faults on me.
I know you'll say that,I know you'll put all the blames on me. So that was why you apologized to that Waiter; you were supposed to cautiou him and not the other way round. You apologized to a stupid blind Waiter that messed up my dress,right? I'm disappointed at you, I said angrily.
I don't care if you are disappointed in me for apologizing to that gentleman at the restaurant. Infact,you own that young man an apology for shouting and disgracing him in the public, Maxwell said already fed up.
You and I know I will never do that that. Anyways,I'm sorry baby if you feel embarrassed by my actions at the restaurant today but you have to tolerate my attitude. You really need to understand me,I told Maxwell.
I have tolerated your unruly attitude a lot. I'm sick and tired of your behavior.Try and change for good and the better for all of us,Maxwell said with anger.
You don't understand me,Maxwell. No one understands me and I hate you all for that. You all think I'm a bad person,you all think I'm the worst creature on earth. I hate you,I said angrily and walked out on him.
Maxwell followed me begging me to come back. He said,he never meant to make me sad but I'm seriously fed up with everything about them condemning me all the time. I don't just understand why they don't like the way I am. Was I the person that created myself this way? Why are they pestering my dear life?

The burden is too much for me to bear
But I have to build myself
My world is not set cause I'm filled with imperfections
The world too is full of mistakes
I'm not trying to belittle the works of the Almighty God
But I'm with a lot of flaws
So I need to remould myself
I want to put it in the right shape
It's not like God couldn't remould me but with his powers,I set to remould myself
I called out to different people but they choose to ignore me
I option to quit
But I summon up with God's grace

I'm fine�
It's just fiction

I'm dying
Yet they say I'm lying
I'm crying
Yet they say I'm smiling
Can't you see I'm in pain?
Just because of the chain
You say I'm fake
Am I to blame?
I shouldn't have never trusted you
Yet I keep falling for your lies
Why haven't I received a helping hand?
I'm so deep in pain and I'm sure I can't survive it

I thought you were my darkness but you rather brought light into my dark world
I thought you were the pains I felt but you erase them from my dark heart
I thought you were mean but you showed me how much you cared
I thought you are going to hurt me but you protected me from getting hurt
I thought you will never be mine not until you showed me you are mine right from the heart
You are my light
You brighten my life
So don't ever leave me
Cause you are all I have got
My everything
My light
My life

Poem

Grace's parents are equally rich like my parents but I never dreamt or imagine myself associating with her because she is too holy.She behaves like virgin Mary; infact,she is holyer than the pope.
She is too boring for my liking,she is not fun to be with and the worse part of it, is that she likes preaching to people too much.My sweet life would not remain the same if I dare associate with her.Gosh,her lifestyle irritates me.
I love and chrish my character so much and it's high time people start liking it too and stop condemning the way I should to live my personal life.I wish people can stop complaining about my lifestyle because I don't really give a Bleep,I don't care what anyone thinks of me.
Maxwell mean a lot to me and I love him so much.I don't double date, I'm faithfull to Maxwell,my boyfriend. I'm dating only him and I don't want to do anything that would hurt is feelings because he loves me deeply too.The only problem I have with Maxwell is my behavior.My arrogance and pride piss him up most of the time and he never hides his irritation towards my misbehavior. He still loves me anyway.
He had proposed to me immediately after my graduation from covenant university but I had turned down his proposal asking him to exercise some patience and give me some time because I'm too young for marriage.

*HAD I KNOW*
*BY*
*BLESSING ODINIYA*

[b][/b]*CHAPTER ONE*
My name is Bella God'spower,I'm from Kogi state but born and brought in Lagos state,Nigeria.I'm twenty years old and I graduated from covenant university,Ota,Ogun state,Nigeria at the age of nineteen. I live with my wealthy parents in Lagos.
My parents are very rich and that makes me to get anything I want in this world.My parents riches and the things of the world got into my head and I became arrogant,rude and disrespectful to everyone around me including my parents.
I'm beautiful and attractive,no doubt.I'm not that intelligent but smart,I know that.I'm proud and wayward.I have no regard for anyone,I hate the less-privillienge so i disassociate myself from them and anything that has to do with them because I consider them inferior and less humans.I associate with the high and rich people that I consider my equal.
I do whatever I like with my life because I thought the world belong to me and a free one.I smoke,club and parting.I go to different parties although,the ones I'm invited to because I think going to uninvited party is for the low life people.
I'm in a relationship with Maxwell from rivers state.He came from a wealthy home too and he is a working young man.I cherish and love Maxwell with my whole heart.We started dating when I was just sixteen years old.He is a nice and not arrogant like me.Infact,his character is opposite mine. my parents and Maxwell dislike my character with passion and they wish I change one day but I'm not bothered because I see my character as the best.I'm wild and too exposed to the world;my parents always compare me with some good girls around us and I hate to be compared with anyone especially when I'm been compared with Grace,our neighbor's daughter.

Title:- Broken and sad
Description:- Why am I so unforunate? Why is life this cruel toward me? Why can life
be fair to me for once? Why is my problems pile up and coming to hunt me everyday?
Can't I be happy for once in my life?
Why is life so unfair to me to me? What crime have i committed that is hunting me this much?
When would my pains end?
When would I experience happiness again like when I was a child?
I'm dying slowing
I'm dying sliently
I'm choking inside me
I'm broken
My heart has broken into pieces
One problem or the other
Do I really deserve these pains?
Who have i wrong that God is tormenting me for the person' sake?
Have mercy on me,oh Lord
I'm dying
My breath is leaving me
I'm bitter and sad
Tears is my only friend and companion now
Help me out of these pains or you please take my life
I regret the day my mother convince me in her womb
I curse the day I was born into this cruel world
Take my life please or you give me happiness again
Stop tormenting me
Take my life instead of tormenting me like this everyday
I'm fighting depression everyday
I'm trying to be happy but it's not working out
Suicide is my only thought now
Suicide and death is all I think of now
I'm smiling to the world but inside me is sad and broken
People that doesn't know what I go through everyday thinks I'm happy,free and wants to be like me
I don't wish anyone what I'm passing through now[i][/i]
I'm becoming useless everyday
This is not what I bargain for na
This is not my plan
I never planned for this,God
You know my thoughts na
Why am I being betrayed and disappointed by people I love so much?
Why am I always the one being decieved?
Why am I always falling into the wrong hands?
Stop whatever game you are playing with me,God
I can't take it anymore
I'm dying
Please help me
I'm crying out loudly to you God,help me
Take my life if you can't help me
I'm becoming useless day by day
death is better than this miserable life I'm living
Do me a favor by taking my life if you can't help me out of these pains and heartaches.

Please,I want to post some stories here but its not working.
Help please[b][/b]