Got this "good girl" i been dating a for while now and she's starting to look everybit like the woman i wanna be with forever. But the thing is my past has come back in the form of a woman (ex-gf) to try n pull a fast 1 on me. A couple of years back,I left for Helsinki to go study n we were ALWAYS in touch, as she ALWAYS visited my parents&friends regularly juz to keep up with everything thats happening around my immediate peepz. . . After a while i STOPPED getting her calls and @ first, i wasn't worried as i thought it had to do wif monetary issues n all that crap. . But then days turned to months, when i EVENTUALLY called her, she went all cold on me and demanded what right i had to question her "NOT" callin me. . After much argument,pleading n all that(taking weeks), she said she wanted out. . I was saddened for a while but i had to man-up&eventually broke the news to friends&family (who couldnt believe cuz we were too close)

I came back to 9ja, hung out for a while (too loosen the numbness). . was introduced to a "good girl" that i'm getting acquainted with & loving all the same. But the thing is. . . she (ex) is pregnant and is claiming the baby's mine. .she's bent on wreckin havoc&even going as far as telling my new found love. . I'd asked her that we go for a paternity test, but she declined. . I'm sorta confused and in need of advice as i stand the loose the happiness of new found love.
.
Thanks People. .

Kevin

how old is the pregancy? how many month /years did u spent there for ur studies? wen u returned did u visited her? n if u did, did u had any intimacy with her? well since
she refused the paternity test its then obvious dat u aint the father of the baby.
call ur newly found love reveal ur past n how she (x gf) went out of ur life n d resurfacing with the pregnancy issue, visit ur parents n inform them about this too.

above all continue ur life n live the bitch ur ex. alone, dont let her plans reck ur happiness.

good luck

Part of this story is still missing

u need to do some calculations after which u let her know that u will neva end up with her even if she tries to ruin ur new relationship.

@all. . . She's already been delivered and it's a BOY!!!It's obvious she STILL can't be pregnant AFTER three years. .

The thing is i had somefin to do wif her when i came back after a 3year stay abroad. . .But i'm having a feeling i'm NOT the father of the baby and she's using it as a trap. . Honestly, i've sat over this issue and given it some serious thought, i'd wanted to tell my gf but @ some point, i lost courage cuz she's the emotional type and you know how it iz. .

v3nom4eva:

@all. . . She's already been delivered and it's a BOY!!!It's obvious she STILL can't be pregnant AFTER three years. .

The thing is i had somefin to do wif her when i came back after a 3year stay abroad. . .But i'm having a feeling i'm NOT the father of the baby and she's using it as a trap. . Honestly, i've sat over this issue and given it some serious thought, i'd wanted to tell my gf but @ some point, i lost courage cuz she's the emotional type and you know how it iz. .

I knew there was something missing from that story

Quel un long histoire?!

look i think u need to tell ur present girl.
and more so, dont mak d mistake of marrying her cos of the baby, do the test,
and if he's urs den accept responsibility finish.
no make the same mistake other guys make and marry outa pity.

@whitelexi. .

It happened when i came back. . I visited her and like the old sayin" whatever happens in vegas. . .stays in vegas". So i moved-on and she didn't say a word UNTIL she got gist that i'd started dating someone else. . I'm still pushing for a paternity test, but she's refused. .So that STILL leaves room for suspicion, abi? that i'm NOT the father. . .

its just so obvious u notthe father.
she wud have said something all this while rather than keep silent.
she is only using this to hold u down thats all.
move on, and like i said earlier, tell ur present so it doesnt take her by suprise.
past mistakes are easily forgiven.

@pat

where u been?

av been around vous. çavá?

I am short of words. Your hands are not clean. The only way out of this cage is paternity test. Know how to present the matter to your Gf before you kill her emotionally. Please dont drag her into all these mess. Sort yourself out like a man.

@pat

moi cherri coco. . bien y tu?

i thot you're on yahoo?

Lets go there love

Alright dearie, letz go.

@our9ja

She's STILL insisting that NO paternity test, and most times she sms's me that she needs money to get tiz n tat for the boy. . If we do the paternity test and the boy turns out to be mine. . then i don't know . .

v3nom4eva:


The thing is i had somefin to do wif her when i came back after a 3year stay abroad. .

The question here is How protected were you when you had that ''somefin wif her''
If you shot without adequate cover then you are the architect of your own problems.
My advise is to get a paternity test done at all cost.

Your ex has got to do a PATERNITY test!!! Dont listen to her refusal. That's the only way you can be 100% sure the baby is yours. You should be too smart to insist no matter what she says. Go for the paternity, if she refuses again, just decline and ignore her , tell her the baby is not yours until you do a paternity test. she might want to dump the baby on you now that she's seen that you're happy and have moved on.

Another vital think is, you have to tell your new girl. She may be disappointed but it was in the past, none of this is your fault, nor hers. You have to be open to her, if she's the one you re considering spending the rest of our life with. explain to her, so that she knows everything going on, and in this case, your ex will not make any threats against you until you have the paternity test

So you know 2 things you need to do now to clear your head and heart
1) Tell your new girl everything
2) Insist on a paternity test no matter what.

Goodluck

Poster,

what female in your family is your gf close to?

@pat

Me lady. . me w8test for thou @ yahoo. please come

whitelexi:

I knew there was something missing from that story

u b prophet? lol

izeek:

its just so obvious u notthe father.
she wud have said something all this while rather than keep silent.
she is only using this to hold u down thats all.
move on, and like i said earlier, tell ur present so it doesnt take her by suprise.
past mistakes are easily forgiven.

exactly

v3nom4eva:

@whitelexi. .

It happened when i came back. . I visited her and like the old sayin" whatever happens in vegas. . .stays in vegas". So i moved-on and she didn't say a word UNTIL she got gist that i'd started dating someone else. . I'm still pushing for a paternity test, but she's refused. .So that STILL leaves room for suspicion, abi? that i'm NOT the father. . .

dont say yet, u may be d father oooooo.

@all
I've tried to get a restraining order (from a court) to keep her on a leash, but she's friends wit my elder sis and she uses her most times to get @ me. . .I've had to switch SIMs to the point i can't EVEN remember my contact numbers. . .I've gotten an attorney, filed for a warrant (that she'd get the paternity test done)

@Ifeleke
Nope. . .wasn't

@Sasha009
She's a good girl and the thought of losing her cuz of it all TRULY scares me, it's not like she's not getting the vibes regarding everything thats happening but she just can't handle it especially when my elder sis doesn't like her @ all. .

@ v3
mon loff, my server is bad 4 now, can't log in. Drop offline, 'll buzz u up l8r.

@pat

tiz a giniral problem. . .try www.meebo.com and sign-on using ur YIM

then buzz frem dear

w8ing mon ruff

Ok hun

@ALL

Thnx for the advice, i'll keep postin as d whole thing unfolds. .

Many thnx again

v3nom4eva:


@Ifeleke
Nope. . .wasn't

Then, channel more energy at proving you aren't the owner. . .Either way it goes,Goodluck_{am sure you will be properly kitted next time you feel like embaking on such mission .}

@ifeleke

I'm channeling the energy i have towards proving my innocence by getting her to go for a paternity test but since she's refused i had to apply brute force (court, 9ja police) etc.

v3nom4eva:

@all
I've tried to get a restraining order (from a court) to keep her on a leash, but she's friends wit my elder sis and she uses her most times to get @ me. . .I've had to switch SIMs to the point i can't EVEN remember my contact numbers. . .I've gotten an attorney, filed for a warrant (that she'd get the paternity test done)

@Ifeleke
Nope. . .wasn't

@Sasha009
She's a good girl and the thought of losing her cuz of it all TRULY scares me, it's not like she's not getting the vibes regarding everything thats happening but she just can't handle it especially when my elder sis doesn't like her @ all. .

Guy you don try too much. All you need do is open up to your Gf. Be cool,mild and matured with your presentation about the whole matter. And for the blackmailer IGNORE her and tell your family mambers to do the same. Let them know that anyone that affiliates with her in your name does so in his or her own peril.

I am talking from experience, Once everyone ignore her she will be forced to come out with the truth. It is the attention you are according her that is making her do more. Ignore every calls and SMS. You must do all you can to ignore. Dont let her get to you with this blackmail. Bone her and move on with your chick. It has worked and I think it will work in this case.

@Our9ja

Thanks. . . But i guess there're some insects u just can't kill once. . .I'll take ur advice into consideration. . I've distanced myself from her and warned my sister to quit her rantin&ravin. . .I'm just w8in for the right setting to tell my gf. . good mood, perfect place n time. . . u no, cuz she's the emotional type and i no wan fall her hand as d girl na die. .

v3nom4eva:

@ifeleke

I'm channeling the energy i have towards proving my innocence by getting her to go for a paternity test but since she's refused i had to apply brute force (court, 9ja police) etc.

Continue with the struggle but get your girlfriend actively involved. . .Believe me, it's better she is in the picture now than when you finally prove your innocence.