Op na Agbani u dey marry

Tharmon:



Is it frustration that making you utter such words at the op?? What atually making you angry?? 😕

many of this girls get bipolar disorder..know this and know peace

Kyng1:



I have lots and I mean a lot of recordings of her suicide attempt, but I don't trust the police because of what happened to me last year. They're crooks and answers to the highest bidder only. Someone sold a land to me double the amount that he has already sold to someone else. My sister got him arrested, he was in cell for barely 24 hours when his father came to bail him, the police bailed him without my notice without my notice or knowledge with immediate effect, until date, I didn't get a penny from my money.

When everyone is having his/her way around you, finding it easy to do anything to you and get away easily, you really need to re-examine your life.

Everything about about your 2 write-ups gives the impression you're a weakling and that doesn't augur well with someone living in Nigeria.

Nigeria has no room for weaklings and you need to brace up.

Kyng1:



So, no solution? But If I choose to quit the marriage will the family agree to return my bride price?

Do you actually need your bride price to be returned before you can effect a divorce??

Which kind man you be self?? Look at someone that should have walked out of the traditional marriage immediately he and his family were first insulted!

A real and normal man shouldn't have gone ahead to complete that useless ceremony in the face of those insults and disrespect.

You sheepishly went ahead and performed the ceremony amidst such level of insults and are now complaining about not having visited your mannerless and disrespectful mother inlaw and her saucy and ill-trained children!

Which mother inlaw? Do you think you have a mother inlaw You think you're married? You're not married, young man! You're still bloodily single, FYI!

Where are you from self . None of my soons should be like you, abeg!

Nawaoo!

Mercylike:


May it not be possible in Jesus name.

You will Continue wit her and her family will keep frustrating u. Amen

Kyng1:
Good evening nairalanders, I'm sorry but this is going to be quite an episode.

I got married barely two months ago, February precisely. I'm In my late thirties, 28 years precisely and my wife Is 24 years old, during the buildup and period of my marriage there was lot's of problems and confusion.

It started when my wife. (then girlfriend) got pregnant (September precisely) immediately after we found out things seems to be going smoothly until November last year when she popped the question "when are we getting married" I told her that I'm not yet ready for marriage but I'm willing to do introduction, that night was hell for me.

Note, it wasn't hell and shocking to me because of what happened that night, it was shocking to me because it was the very first time she asked me such a question, and her reaction was shocking to me. If she has previously asked me this particular question severally and I'm not telling her what she wanted to hear I'd have understood why she reacted In such a way and manner, but it was the very first time she was throwing that question on me.

Back to what happened that night. Immediately I told her that I wasn't ready for marriage she started crying and laying curses on me, that I'm wicked, after suffering with me etc, then I responded that she never suffered with me that this should be the very last time that she should utter such word, I said so because she has been uttering it frequently on any slight quarrel, but on that faithful night, I couldn't take it any longer I told her that you suffered with me and I have two A.C on both parlor and room before I met you, that you suffered with me and I have a 75 inch TV, freezer, inverter, luxury center table, dstv etc. You suffered with me because of what, that I'm living in a self contain, or don't have my own house or car. This is someone that I'm feeding on a daily basis back then that I'm still a tenant and yet to have my own house, we went to eatery to eat almost on a weekly basis, to the extend that she refused to go to her parents house for months.

Back to the topic, she fought me that night from 10pm to 3am, after that night she kept popping up the question almost on a daily basis and it always leads to quarrel, arguments and fights, it came to a point that she began threatening me with suicide, holding knife that she's going to stab herself, using rope to tie her neck with all her strength which normally ends with her having reddish eye's, coughing, etc until I intervene, there was a day she drank tiles wash liquid, and hypo, that night I gave her oil, and nothing happened to her, that was the deal breaker, I finally agreed to proceed with the marriage, because I was scared that If anything should happen to her then I'd go to prison for the rest of my life and my life Is over.

Note I have 4.3 million naira on my account as at then, and I intend using the money to start up a business, as I wasn't doing anything. It is also worthy to note that after lots of pressure it came to a point that I no longer tells her that I'm not ready for marriage but started telling her that I don't have money, but her response was always, "na lie, na lie, na lie" you get money. She has seen my debit alert and saw my balance. So after she drank the hypo and chemical used for tiles wash, I agreed to proceed with the marriage.

By December, I began making marriage preparations, the adrenaline rush was something else. I went to the village to inform my father people, so they can come to perform the traditional rights, as my father was no more.

On the day of the traditional marriage, her mother called me early in the morning that I need to carry some drinks to my "girlfriend, now wife" father house that she'll support me with one wine, that she's doing it because I'm complaining that I don't have money, I took two carton of Heineken, two carton of maltina one wine + the wine she supported me with and two Gordon gin. "I have no idea that I was being brain washed, they're the one's that's supposed to present those and I'd have to double it during the traditional rights, she deceived me.

Before the traditional marriage began, my father's people that's supposed to perform the traditional rights didn't arrive on time due to the distance they're coming from, her mom was already angry, few minutes later my father's people eventually arrived, immediately after their arrival "my girlfriend, now wife" elder brother made a statement which provoked me, he said "if una nor one marry make una dey go, I go pay una all the money when una dun spend, rubbish"

Immediately I heard that, I took off my agbada remaining my inner senator shirt and trouser that I'm not doing again, her mom starter ranting and raining all sorts of insults on me, she made a statement that I should never near or come close to her ever again. After some few minutes my mom calmed me down and I put on my agbada again.

Few minutes later the traditional rites began, I was inside when my younger brother came to inform me that my wife half brother's have opened and drank some of the gins I brought for the traditional rites, I Immediately told him to count and look for somewhere to buy and have them replaced, he did and before he came back they have taken more. He had to go back and have the gins replaced a second time. Immediately after the end of the traditional marriage her mom handed me a nylon with 100 notes not up to 3,000 naira and she handed my wife another that's filled to the brim, that the one she gave to me was what they sprayed me and the one for her was what they sprayed her, I was in rage and I gave the nylon to her that how can she share money spared between husband and wife, she gladly collected the money. Shortly after that, I heard her elder sister, the one my wife is following directly by birth, saying "that her sister (my wife) don't know what she has gotten herself into, I Immediately cut her short that what kind of statement is that and what next she did? She started raining all sorts of insults on me " Daniel you dey craze, Daniel your head nor correct, Daniel na God go punish you, Daniel you be bastard, we go tie you flog we go lock you up" she repeated these words continously, she pulled her slippers and wanted to come and fight me, In which they held her off. This is someone that isn't up to the age of my younger brother, I felt really embarrassed because all my friends, brother's, sisters and my mom was there. Note that I single handedly carried every single expenses of the marriage, the only expense my wife family all agreed and contributed to was making "jotters notes" for the guests that sprayed us money, which they didn't do, until date I didn't saw any jotter, not even one.

Another thing that really got me angry was few weeks before the marriage my wife mom was assuring me that there's no need to cook, that we only have to cook for reception only, which I fully agreed. But at same time I send my mom some money to prepare something just in case things didn't went as planned and because of my father's people that's coming from distance.

Two day's to the traditional marriage I sent her 490,000 naira for chicken and ingredients. Note, I have already bought two bags of rice and 2 gallons of groundnut Oil for cooking at the reception whereas I gave my mom half bag of rice as back up and three cartons of chicken for the reception refreshment. But to my surprise I saw that she, my wife mother cooked jollof rice at the traditional marriage day and while sharing she was talking continously, that I'm supposed to give her money to cook but I didn't gave her any money that she cooked the rice with her own money. I was in rage because firstly I sent her 490,000 to cook for the reception, in which she used my chicken, groundnut Oil, and ingredients to cook the jollof rice she cooked at the traditional marriage day, she only used her two basket of rice which they already have at home. And because of that two basket of rice she was downgrading me in front of my father's people, my mother's people, my brothers, sisters, friends. If she had told me that she wanted to cook rice at the traditional marriage I'd have gladly sent her the money, If I can send 490,000 for just chicken and ingredients, what's 14,000 that I can't send for two baskets of rice, this was someone that told me we aren't cooking anything on the traditional marriage day but only for the reception.

Also, before the marriage my wife mother has already arranged for us doing court weeding, which I wasn't comfortable with but since my wife was pregnant and she insist that she must wear a white weeding gown, our both churches refused to Wed us with her wearing a white wedding gown with pregnancy. So I had no choice than to settle for the court weeding that her mother proposed, but 3 weeks to the weeding my elder sister talked to her pastor and he agreed to wed us with her wearing a white weeding gown and with her pregnancy, I informed my wife and she was angry, It lead to lots of quarrels but I stood on my ground that I'm no longer proceeding with the court weeding. 4 days later I saw a chat with my wife and her elder sister, she was telling my wife that I refused to do court weeding because of the rubbish that I'm thinking that their mother said she isn't going to attend and she her self won't attend. I snapped the chat and pretended like I didn't noticed but waiting to see how everything unfolds, on the day of the weeding, her mom didn't appear in church, neither her 3 sisters. But they all came to the reception ground, at the reception when they were spraying they focused on her only, my wife mom and her sisters, none of them sprayed me, not even 50 naira, but I sprayed my wife mom. I'm not saying this because I'm expecting the money, I'm saying this because as their sister husband they're supposed to spray us both, it felt embarrassing when they were dancing and spraying only her and I was just there like I'm nothing.

Less I forget, on the morning of the reception which was the day after our traditional marriage, I called the MC and explained everything that transpired on the traditional marriage. "her mom, sharing money that was sprayed between us" and gave him names to announce as those that'd pick any money that was sprayed, I didn't included any of her sisters neither mine. My wife was angry and asked me severally to include one of her sister which I plainly disagree, she became cold, and on the reception day refused to dance. When the marriage was over we counted the money and it was 233,100 naira. For a marriage I spent 4 million plus. After everything my wife started mocking me that they've stolen my money that I think I'm wise by not allowing her sister to be among those picking money, she mocked me endlessly and started using her hands on her eye's to tell me "onwonyi" I told her that I'm not doing again that I'm returning her bride price and she called me by my name daring me to return it. I was in rage and started remembering when she was pleading with me to marry her and remove shame from her eye's, in my mind this was someone that was begging me to marry her few weeks ago, threatening to commit suicide, now daring me to return her bride price and now mocking me. I slapped her that night on our hotel room, and she fought with me for hours, and the next day she reported me to my younger brother and her best friend, the one that did chief bridesmaid for her, that I beat her on our weeding night.

Days passed, weeks passed, two months has started passed since the day of our weeding and I'm now living from hand to mouth, this same woman that was telling me back then that we'd live as a couple that even if it's Garri that we've we'll soak it and no one will know or hear about it, is now the one crying for food whenever she's hungry, she doesn't eat rice without eggs or meat, nor does she eats Eba talk more of Garri. Right now I felt deceived, manipulated into a marriage that I wasn't actually ready for, I'd have invested my 4 million into something tangible and reaping the fruit by now, right now there's no money to eat properly or go out on Sundays to have some bottles of achohol.

We're querrelling almost on a daily basis, there's no peace, sometimes I do sleep at my brother's place to have that few hours of peace than to go home to her, but it's been since a month I last did that. Recently I have been informing her that I'll return her bring price and I'm not marrying again, that marriage isn't by force that I wasn't even ready to get married if not for her suicide manipulation, that I'm just waiting for her to give birth and after 6 months I'd return her bride price, but she think I'm joking. I'm sure going to surprise her. After all I'm not sexually attracted to her, she's short, not fat and not slim either, and fair. And I I'm sexually attracted to extremely fat, dark or chocolate skinned ladies. I find myself getting extremely aroused by just staring at the pictures of fat ladies on Instagram or anywhere I come across them, on the internet, bike, etc. But my wife totally naked and close to me doesn't in anyway arouse me, not even slightly. Until date I can't get over the 4 million naira plus that I spent marrying her, it hurts me a lot till this very moment.

And for what her mom did by deceiving me to be the one to bring drinks, wines, and gin and also the one that have them replaced, by lying to me and insulting me in front of my family that I didn't gave her any money to cook because of two basket of rice she cooked, by sharing money for I and my wife etc, since the day of our marriage until date I haven't visited her, and since then also my wife also refused to visit my mom or my family because I refused to visit her mom. My mom has pleaded with me on several occasions to visit her and apologize, but I don't know why I should apologize to someone who tricked and insulted me. Right now I really wished to know if I did the right thing by not going to see her until date or just overreacting. Please I need your honest answers on this.

You saw all the RED FLAG and you still got married to her?

Whatever decision you take that's good for you go ahead with it.

How was your relationship with her family before pregnancy, was it cordial or not. Well you caused some of these things directly or indirectly. No woman likes being told by their man especially after pregnancy matter, that he isn't ready for marriage.

As a man you didn't plan well for life after wedding, who are you trying to impress. You had 4million plus and you spent everything on a two day event just to prove what?

You feel regrets because you don't think you were appreciated enough.

Everyone involved get hin own fault. You were not manipulated, it's the normal thing to do. Get someone pregnant and get married simple. If it were you daughter how would you feel if the man doesn't feel like getting married to your daughter?

Well here is my advice, you can either get off this ship or steer the ship. If this story of yours if fairly told, you are in for a hot and bumpy married life. All women are manipulators, if you leave this one the next one might be worse. It requires serious wisdom in this issue.

Most times women don't mean what they say, it's just the way they feel at the moment. At 24, your wife is a baby who thinks like a child. The only concern I have is her parents, reconcile with her family, not because you are weak but for peace sake and for your future safety.

After reconciliation, then gradually begin to withdraw, and never let your wife know why.

See man up and postpone whatever plans you have until your wife has safely delivered. Now is not the time to put her under pressure. They already have a case of domestic violence against you. It even happened on your wedding night. If anything happens to that girl and ur child, you will regret it for the rest of you life. Forget red pill o. Keep her calm and calm the tensed situation.

After recovery from birth you can now reassess the situation, my only concern is her parents and family, and finally, make sure you conduct a DNA test, this story get as e be.

Tharmon:



Is it frustration that making you utter such words at the op?? What atually making you angry?? 😕

Bcox he is foolish.. He saw death and knowingly entered inside without consulting us..

But now that he is in deep danger, what is our own concern

Mercylike:


Bcox he is foolish.. He saw death and knowingly entered inside without consulting us..

But now that he is in deep danger, what is our own concern

He made a mistake, okay fine. But his here now seeking advice so there is no need of cursing him alright? Yes, it my concern because it a public forum and everyone is allowed to share thier opinion!

psalmylee:
many of this girls get bipolar disorder..know this and know peace

Bipolar disorder😂😂😂

100% sure She has that

I lost interest at some point... but to the point I read, you've likely entered one chance. Dysfunctional wife's family, toxic relationship and emotional blackmail.

You'll didn't go through counselling,
No prayer, Nothing! Wish you well has you continue to endure you marital bliss.

Kyng1:
Good evening nairalanders, I'm sorry but this is going to be quite an episode.

I got married barely two months ago, February precisely. I'm In my late thirties, 28 years precisely and my wife Is 24 years old, during the buildup and period of my marriage there was lot's of problems and confusion.

It started when my wife. (then girlfriend) got pregnant (September precisely) immediately after we found out things seems to be going smoothly until November last year when she popped the question "when are we getting married" I told her that I'm not yet ready for marriage but I'm willing to do introduction, that night was hell for me.

Note, it wasn't hell and shocking to me because of what happened that night, it was shocking to me because it was the very first time she asked me such a question, and her reaction was shocking to me. If she has previously asked me this particular question severally and I'm not telling her what she wanted to hear I'd have understood why she reacted In such a way and manner, but it was the very first time she was throwing that question on me.

Back to what happened that night. Immediately I told her that I wasn't ready for marriage she started crying and laying curses on me, that I'm wicked, after suffering with me etc, then I responded that she never suffered with me that this should be the very last time that she should utter such word, I said so because she has been uttering it frequently on any slight quarrel, but on that faithful night, I couldn't take it any longer I told her that you suffered with me and I have two A.C on both parlor and room before I met you, that you suffered with me and I have a 75 inch TV, freezer, inverter, luxury center table, dstv etc. You suffered with me because of what, that I'm living in a self contain, or don't have my own house or car. This is someone that I'm feeding on a daily basis back then that I'm still a tenant and yet to have my own house, we went to eatery to eat almost on a weekly basis, to the extend that she refused to go to her parents house for months.

Back to the topic, she fought me that night from 10pm to 3am, after that night she kept popping up the question almost on a daily basis and it always leads to quarrel, arguments and fights, it came to a point that she began threatening me with suicide, holding knife that she's going to stab herself, using rope to tie her neck with all her strength which normally ends with her having reddish eye's, coughing, etc until I intervene, there was a day she drank tiles wash liquid, and hypo, that night I gave her oil, and nothing happened to her, that was the deal breaker, I finally agreed to proceed with the marriage, because I was scared that If anything should happen to her then I'd go to prison for the rest of my life and my life Is over.

Note I have 4.3 million naira on my account as at then, and I intend using the money to start up a business, as I wasn't doing anything. It is also worthy to note that after lots of pressure it came to a point that I no longer tells her that I'm not ready for marriage but started telling her that I don't have money, but her response was always, "na lie, na lie, na lie" you get money. She has seen my debit alert and saw my balance. So after she drank the hypo and chemical used for tiles wash, I agreed to proceed with the marriage.

By December, I began making marriage preparations, the adrenaline rush was something else. I went to the village to inform my father people, so they can come to perform the traditional rights, as my father was no more.

On the day of the traditional marriage, her mother called me early in the morning that I need to carry some drinks to my "girlfriend, now wife" father house that she'll support me with one wine, that she's doing it because I'm complaining that I don't have money, I took two carton of Heineken, two carton of maltina one wine + the wine she supported me with and two Gordon gin. "I have no idea that I was being brain washed, they're the one's that's supposed to present those and I'd have to double it during the traditional rights, she deceived me.

Before the traditional marriage began, my father's people that's supposed to perform the traditional rights didn't arrive on time due to the distance they're coming from, her mom was already angry, few minutes later my father's people eventually arrived, immediately after their arrival "my girlfriend, now wife" elder brother made a statement which provoked me, he said "if una nor one marry make una dey go, I go pay una all the money when una dun spend, rubbish"

Immediately I heard that, I took off my agbada remaining my inner senator shirt and trouser that I'm not doing again, her mom starter ranting and raining all sorts of insults on me, she made a statement that I should never near or come close to her ever again. After some few minutes my mom calmed me down and I put on my agbada again.

Few minutes later the traditional rites began, I was inside when my younger brother came to inform me that my wife half brother's have opened and drank some of the gins I brought for the traditional rites, I Immediately told him to count and look for somewhere to buy and have them replaced, he did and before he came back they have taken more. He had to go back and have the gins replaced a second time. Immediately after the end of the traditional marriage her mom handed me a nylon with 100 notes not up to 3,000 naira and she handed my wife another that's filled to the brim, that the one she gave to me was what they sprayed me and the one for her was what they sprayed her, I was in rage and I gave the nylon to her that how can she share money spared between husband and wife, she gladly collected the money. Shortly after that, I heard her elder sister, the one my wife is following directly by birth, saying "that her sister (my wife) don't know what she has gotten herself into, I Immediately cut her short that what kind of statement is that and what next she did? She started raining all sorts of insults on me " Daniel you dey craze, Daniel your head nor correct, Daniel na God go punish you, Daniel you be bastard, we go tie you flog we go lock you up" she repeated these words continously, she pulled her slippers and wanted to come and fight me, In which they held her off. This is someone that isn't up to the age of my younger brother, I felt really embarrassed because all my friends, brother's, sisters and my mom was there. Note that I single handedly carried every single expenses of the marriage, the only expense my wife family all agreed and contributed to was making "jotters notes" for the guests that sprayed us money, which they didn't do, until date I didn't saw any jotter, not even one.

Another thing that really got me angry was few weeks before the marriage my wife mom was assuring me that there's no need to cook, that we only have to cook for reception only, which I fully agreed. But at same time I send my mom some money to prepare something just in case things didn't went as planned and because of my father's people that's coming from distance.

Two day's to the traditional marriage I sent her 490,000 naira for chicken and ingredients. Note, I have already bought two bags of rice and 2 gallons of groundnut Oil for cooking at the reception whereas I gave my mom half bag of rice as back up and three cartons of chicken for the reception refreshment. But to my surprise I saw that she, my wife mother cooked jollof rice at the traditional marriage day and while sharing she was talking continously, that I'm supposed to give her money to cook but I didn't gave her any money that she cooked the rice with her own money. I was in rage because firstly I sent her 490,000 to cook for the reception, in which she used my chicken, groundnut Oil, and ingredients to cook the jollof rice she cooked at the traditional marriage day, she only used her two basket of rice which they already have at home. And because of that two basket of rice she was downgrading me in front of my father's people, my mother's people, my brothers, sisters, friends. If she had told me that she wanted to cook rice at the traditional marriage I'd have gladly sent her the money, If I can send 490,000 for just chicken and ingredients, what's 14,000 that I can't send for two baskets of rice, this was someone that told me we aren't cooking anything on the traditional marriage day but only for the reception.

Also, before the marriage my wife mother has already arranged for us doing court weeding, which I wasn't comfortable with but since my wife was pregnant and she insist that she must wear a white weeding gown, our both churches refused to Wed us with her wearing a white wedding gown with pregnancy. So I had no choice than to settle for the court weeding that her mother proposed, but 3 weeks to the weeding my elder sister talked to her pastor and he agreed to wed us with her wearing a white weeding gown and with her pregnancy, I informed my wife and she was angry, It lead to lots of quarrels but I stood on my ground that I'm no longer proceeding with the court weeding. 4 days later I saw a chat with my wife and her elder sister, she was telling my wife that I refused to do court weeding because of the rubbish that I'm thinking that their mother said she isn't going to attend and she her self won't attend. I snapped the chat and pretended like I didn't noticed but waiting to see how everything unfolds, on the day of the weeding, her mom didn't appear in church, neither her 3 sisters. But they all came to the reception ground, at the reception when they were spraying they focused on her only, my wife mom and her sisters, none of them sprayed me, not even 50 naira, but I sprayed my wife mom. I'm not saying this because I'm expecting the money, I'm saying this because as their sister husband they're supposed to spray us both, it felt embarrassing when they were dancing and spraying only her and I was just there like I'm nothing.

Less I forget, on the morning of the reception which was the day after our traditional marriage, I called the MC and explained everything that transpired on the traditional marriage. "her mom, sharing money that was sprayed between us" and gave him names to announce as those that'd pick any money that was sprayed, I didn't included any of her sisters neither mine. My wife was angry and asked me severally to include one of her sister which I plainly disagree, she became cold, and on the reception day refused to dance. When the marriage was over we counted the money and it was 233,100 naira. For a marriage I spent 4 million plus. After everything my wife started mocking me that they've stolen my money that I think I'm wise by not allowing her sister to be among those picking money, she mocked me endlessly and started using her hands on her eye's to tell me "onwonyi" I told her that I'm not doing again that I'm returning her bride price and she called me by my name daring me to return it. I was in rage and started remembering when she was pleading with me to marry her and remove shame from her eye's, in my mind this was someone that was begging me to marry her few weeks ago, threatening to commit suicide, now daring me to return her bride price and now mocking me. I slapped her that night on our hotel room, and she fought with me for hours, and the next day she reported me to my younger brother and her best friend, the one that did chief bridesmaid for her, that I beat her on our weeding night.

Days passed, weeks passed, two months has started passed since the day of our weeding and I'm now living from hand to mouth, this same woman that was telling me back then that we'd live as a couple that even if it's Garri that we've we'll soak it and no one will know or hear about it, is now the one crying for food whenever she's hungry, she doesn't eat rice without eggs or meat, nor does she eats Eba talk more of Garri. Right now I felt deceived, manipulated into a marriage that I wasn't actually ready for, I'd have invested my 4 million into something tangible and reaping the fruit by now, right now there's no money to eat properly or go out on Sundays to have some bottles of achohol.

We're querrelling almost on a daily basis, there's no peace, sometimes I do sleep at my brother's place to have that few hours of peace than to go home to her, but it's been since a month I last did that. Recently I have been informing her that I'll return her bring price and I'm not marrying again, that marriage isn't by force that I wasn't even ready to get married if not for her suicide manipulation, that I'm just waiting for her to give birth and after 6 months I'd return her bride price, but she think I'm joking. I'm sure going to surprise her. After all I'm not sexually attracted to her, she's short, not fat and not slim either, and fair. And I I'm sexually attracted to extremely fat, dark or chocolate skinned ladies. I find myself getting extremely aroused by just staring at the pictures of fat ladies on Instagram or anywhere I come across them, on the internet, bike, etc. But my wife totally naked and close to me doesn't in anyway arouse me, not even slightly. Until date I can't get over the 4 million naira plus that I spent marrying her, it hurts me a lot till this very moment.

And for what her mom did by deceiving me to be the one to bring drinks, wines, and gin and also the one that have them replaced, by lying to me and insulting me in front of my family that I didn't gave her any money to cook because of two basket of rice she cooked, by sharing money for I and my wife etc, since the day of our marriage until date I haven't visited her, and since then also my wife also refused to visit my mom or my family because I refused to visit her mom. My mom has pleaded with me on several occasions to visit her and apologize, but I don't know why I should apologize to someone who tricked and insulted me. Right now I really wished to know if I did the right thing by not going to see her until date or just overreacting. Please I need your honest answers on this.

Lol 😆. There is something you guys aren't seeing. Everyone is a protagonist in their own story, im not saying he is wrong but I'm saying from his angle he is absolutely right: relative truth. From analyzing the story you be man way no de gree for anybody; anyhow e come you go give them back! It's obvious you were lured but I think there has been a bitter blood between you and the family before marriage all thanks to your wife too. But I wonder what you preach to people about her as well. You are now married you have to settle all bad bloods and start anew. Quarrels and fights doesn't solve problems and please learn to stop reacting at everything. The best way to enjoy a woman even the devil( terrible woman) is to not respond to their talks if you keep up with that you'll see that her own talks will reduce. A fight of 3hrs means it's an exchange of words within those periods but if you keep quiet the quarrel will not pass 5mins. No be who throw jabs pass na win argument but na who allow the other person fool himself. I don't talk at all I just take actions. Now for the feeding aspect although you are feeling robbed you have to care for your wife and your unborn child. So get busy with even the ones you can't do on a norm.. And settle down and talk to your woman! You can chase 10,000 together. People asking for divorce are not wise. Women are all demons in my eyes just look for the one you can tame and live with her. And your woman is just bitter cause it's obvious that you Mr Daniel can say hurtful words and women are moved by words. So put your house in order and be man... Call her mum and apologise and allow the remaining sibling to come to their senses naturally. Treat her well and things will start working for you again. Remember you are now one..

You don buy market. Congrats x.

Kyng1:
Good evening nairalanders, I'm sorry but this is going to be quite an episode.

I got married barely two months ago, February precisely. I'm In my late thirties, 28 years precisely and my wife Is 24 years old, during the buildup and period of my marriage there was lot's of problems and confusion.

It started when my wife. (then girlfriend) got pregnant (September precisely) immediately after we found out things seems to be going smoothly until November last year when she popped the question "when are we getting married" I told her that I'm not yet ready for marriage but I'm willing to do introduction, that night was hell for me.

Note, it wasn't hell and shocking to me because of what happened that night, it was shocking to me because it was the very first time she asked me such a question, and her reaction was shocking to me. If she has previously asked me this particular question severally and I'm not telling her what she wanted to hear I'd have understood why she reacted In such a way and manner, but it was the very first time she was throwing that question on me.

Back to what happened that night. Immediately I told her that I wasn't ready for marriage she started crying and laying curses on me, that I'm wicked, after suffering with me etc, then I responded that she never suffered with me that this should be the very last time that she should utter such word, I said so because she has been uttering it frequently on any slight quarrel, but on that faithful night, I couldn't take it any longer I told her that you suffered with me and I have two A.C on both parlor and room before I met you, that you suffered with me and I have a 75 inch TV, freezer, inverter, luxury center table, dstv etc. You suffered with me because of what, that I'm living in a self contain, or don't have my own house or car. This is someone that I'm feeding on a daily basis back then that I'm still a tenant and yet to have my own house, we went to eatery to eat almost on a weekly basis, to the extend that she refused to go to her parents house for months.

Back to the topic, she fought me that night from 10pm to 3am, after that night she kept popping up the question almost on a daily basis and it always leads to quarrel, arguments and fights, it came to a point that she began threatening me with suicide, holding knife that she's going to stab herself, using rope to tie her neck with all her strength which normally ends with her having reddish eye's, coughing, etc until I intervene, there was a day she drank tiles wash liquid, and hypo, that night I gave her oil, and nothing happened to her, that was the deal breaker, I finally agreed to proceed with the marriage, because I was scared that If anything should happen to her then I'd go to prison for the rest of my life and my life Is over.

Note I have 4.3 million naira on my account as at then, and I intend using the money to start up a business, as I wasn't doing anything. It is also worthy to note that after lots of pressure it came to a point that I no longer tells her that I'm not ready for marriage but started telling her that I don't have money, but her response was always, "na lie, na lie, na lie" you get money. She has seen my debit alert and saw my balance. So after she drank the hypo and chemical used for tiles wash, I agreed to proceed with the marriage.

By December, I began making marriage preparations, the adrenaline rush was something else. I went to the village to inform my father people, so they can come to perform the traditional rights, as my father was no more.

On the day of the traditional marriage, her mother called me early in the morning that I need to carry some drinks to my "girlfriend, now wife" father house that she'll support me with one wine, that she's doing it because I'm complaining that I don't have money, I took two carton of Heineken, two carton of maltina one wine + the wine she supported me with and two Gordon gin. "I have no idea that I was being brain washed, they're the one's that's supposed to present those and I'd have to double it during the traditional rights, she deceived me.

Before the traditional marriage began, my father's people that's supposed to perform the traditional rights didn't arrive on time due to the distance they're coming from, her mom was already angry, few minutes later my father's people eventually arrived, immediately after their arrival "my girlfriend, now wife" elder brother made a statement which provoked me, he said "if una nor one marry make una dey go, I go pay una all the money when una dun spend, rubbish"

Immediately I heard that, I took off my agbada remaining my inner senator shirt and trouser that I'm not doing again, her mom starter ranting and raining all sorts of insults on me, she made a statement that I should never near or come close to her ever again. After some few minutes my mom calmed me down and I put on my agbada again.

Few minutes later the traditional rites began, I was inside when my younger brother came to inform me that my wife half brother's have opened and drank some of the gins I brought for the traditional rites, I Immediately told him to count and look for somewhere to buy and have them replaced, he did and before he came back they have taken more. He had to go back and have the gins replaced a second time. Immediately after the end of the traditional marriage her mom handed me a nylon with 100 notes not up to 3,000 naira and she handed my wife another that's filled to the brim, that the one she gave to me was what they sprayed me and the one for her was what they sprayed her, I was in rage and I gave the nylon to her that how can she share money spared between husband and wife, she gladly collected the money. Shortly after that, I heard her elder sister, the one my wife is following directly by birth, saying "that her sister (my wife) don't know what she has gotten herself into, I Immediately cut her short that what kind of statement is that and what next she did? She started raining all sorts of insults on me " Daniel you dey craze, Daniel your head nor correct, Daniel na God go punish you, Daniel you be bastard, we go tie you flog we go lock you up" she repeated these words continously, she pulled her slippers and wanted to come and fight me, In which they held her off. This is someone that isn't up to the age of my younger brother, I felt really embarrassed because all my friends, brother's, sisters and my mom was there. Note that I single handedly carried every single expenses of the marriage, the only expense my wife family all agreed and contributed to was making "jotters notes" for the guests that sprayed us money, which they didn't do, until date I didn't saw any jotter, not even one.

Another thing that really got me angry was few weeks before the marriage my wife mom was assuring me that there's no need to cook, that we only have to cook for reception only, which I fully agreed. But at same time I send my mom some money to prepare something just in case things didn't went as planned and because of my father's people that's coming from distance.

Two day's to the traditional marriage I sent her 490,000 naira for chicken and ingredients. Note, I have already bought two bags of rice and 2 gallons of groundnut Oil for cooking at the reception whereas I gave my mom half bag of rice as back up and three cartons of chicken for the reception refreshment. But to my surprise I saw that she, my wife mother cooked jollof rice at the traditional marriage day and while sharing she was talking continously, that I'm supposed to give her money to cook but I didn't gave her any money that she cooked the rice with her own money. I was in rage because firstly I sent her 490,000 to cook for the reception, in which she used my chicken, groundnut Oil, and ingredients to cook the jollof rice she cooked at the traditional marriage day, she only used her two basket of rice which they already have at home. And because of that two basket of rice she was downgrading me in front of my father's people, my mother's people, my brothers, sisters, friends. If she had told me that she wanted to cook rice at the traditional marriage I'd have gladly sent her the money, If I can send 490,000 for just chicken and ingredients, what's 14,000 that I can't send for two baskets of rice, this was someone that told me we aren't cooking anything on the traditional marriage day but only for the reception.

Also, before the marriage my wife mother has already arranged for us doing court weeding, which I wasn't comfortable with but since my wife was pregnant and she insist that she must wear a white weeding gown, our both churches refused to Wed us with her wearing a white wedding gown with pregnancy. So I had no choice than to settle for the court weeding that her mother proposed, but 3 weeks to the weeding my elder sister talked to her pastor and he agreed to wed us with her wearing a white weeding gown and with her pregnancy, I informed my wife and she was angry, It lead to lots of quarrels but I stood on my ground that I'm no longer proceeding with the court weeding. 4 days later I saw a chat with my wife and her elder sister, she was telling my wife that I refused to do court weeding because of the rubbish that I'm thinking that their mother said she isn't going to attend and she her self won't attend. I snapped the chat and pretended like I didn't noticed but waiting to see how everything unfolds, on the day of the weeding, her mom didn't appear in church, neither her 3 sisters. But they all came to the reception ground, at the reception when they were spraying they focused on her only, my wife mom and her sisters, none of them sprayed me, not even 50 naira, but I sprayed my wife mom. I'm not saying this because I'm expecting the money, I'm saying this because as their sister husband they're supposed to spray us both, it felt embarrassing when they were dancing and spraying only her and I was just there like I'm nothing.

Less I forget, on the morning of the reception which was the day after our traditional marriage, I called the MC and explained everything that transpired on the traditional marriage. "her mom, sharing money that was sprayed between us" and gave him names to announce as those that'd pick any money that was sprayed, I didn't included any of her sisters neither mine. My wife was angry and asked me severally to include one of her sister which I plainly disagree, she became cold, and on the reception day refused to dance. When the marriage was over we counted the money and it was 233,100 naira. For a marriage I spent 4 million plus. After everything my wife started mocking me that they've stolen my money that I think I'm wise by not allowing her sister to be among those picking money, she mocked me endlessly and started using her hands on her eye's to tell me "onwonyi" I told her that I'm not doing again that I'm returning her bride price and she called me by my name daring me to return it. I was in rage and started remembering when she was pleading with me to marry her and remove shame from her eye's, in my mind this was someone that was begging me to marry her few weeks ago, threatening to commit suicide, now daring me to return her bride price and now mocking me. I slapped her that night on our hotel room, and she fought with me for hours, and the next day she reported me to my younger brother and her best friend, the one that did chief bridesmaid for her, that I beat her on our weeding night.

Days passed, weeks passed, two months has started passed since the day of our weeding and I'm now living from hand to mouth, this same woman that was telling me back then that we'd live as a couple that even if it's Garri that we've we'll soak it and no one will know or hear about it, is now the one crying for food whenever she's hungry, she doesn't eat rice without eggs or meat, nor does she eats Eba talk more of Garri. Right now I felt deceived, manipulated into a marriage that I wasn't actually ready for, I'd have invested my 4 million into something tangible and reaping the fruit by now, right now there's no money to eat properly or go out on Sundays to have some bottles of achohol.

We're querrelling almost on a daily basis, there's no peace, sometimes I do sleep at my brother's place to have that few hours of peace than to go home to her, but it's been since a month I last did that. Recently I have been informing her that I'll return her bring price and I'm not marrying again, that marriage isn't by force that I wasn't even ready to get married if not for her suicide manipulation, that I'm just waiting for her to give birth and after 6 months I'd return her bride price, but she think I'm joking. I'm sure going to surprise her. After all I'm not sexually attracted to her, she's short, not fat and not slim either, and fair. And I I'm sexually attracted to extremely fat, dark or chocolate skinned ladies. I find myself getting extremely aroused by just staring at the pictures of fat ladies on Instagram or anywhere I come across them, on the internet, bike, etc. But my wife totally naked and close to me doesn't in anyway arouse me, not even slightly. Until date I can't get over the 4 million naira plus that I spent marrying her, it hurts me a lot till this very moment.

And for what her mom did by deceiving me to be the one to bring drinks, wines, and gin and also the one that have them replaced, by lying to me and insulting me in front of my family that I didn't gave her any money to cook because of two basket of rice she cooked, by sharing money for I and my wife etc, since the day of our marriage until date I haven't visited her, and since then also my wife also refused to visit my mom or my family because I refused to visit her mom. My mom has pleaded with me on several occasions to visit her and apologize, but I don't know why I should apologize to someone who tricked and insulted me. Right now I really wished to know if I did the right thing by not going to see her until date or just overreacting. Please I need your honest answers on this.

Am happy u acknowledged u were not ready

Because the two of u are not serious.
You sef try get friends wey dey smoke weed,them go give u opinion.
Cos I for no even allow u go into that waste of funds,time and resources u called marriage

Omoh.... I don laff tire for this thread.
You can never have enough of nairaland dramas.
When you think that you have seen it all, then another Banga will pop up.
I feel like giving you e-slap with your write-up bro.
How can you descend so low?
You don dey collect wotowoto even right from your traditional marriage day with you family present.
Daniel you dey craze true true,
Daniel, na God go punish you.
Daniel..... Oooohhhhhj I don't even no de kind curse I fit place on you add join your in-laws own

Kyng1:


When I first met her, she was good to me. The only thing that I despite about her was her suicide attempt at any slight quarrel or arguments. But currently now, she has completely turned an entirely different person.

stop replying Kobojunkie so that your mental health will be safe. He is just like your mother inlaw and your wife.

Some of una dey think say una wise but your foolishness is second to none. You dey sleep with woman and you expect her not to get pregnant? She gets pregnant and asks you your plan for her and you open your mouth to tell her you are not ready for marriage? Because you get ac and television for inside self con before you met her, na why you must use and dump her? You dey friend mad woman wey dey use suicide dey threaten you and you are still aroused? As in she even dey abuse you before going to see her people and you still went ahead to marry her? I am sure if you had seen a well behaved woman, you would have given one thousand and one reasons why you cannot marry her. If them tell una no sex before marriage, una no go hear. Na that time una libido go high to the highest level. Mr man, you never see anything. The battle has just begun. Reap the reward of your foolishness. You don buy market, gather mind enjoy am.

I am not even going to comment on all this drama you put up here o. My own is that, you had 4m naira to your name as a young man and you spent it all on marriage? Are you OK? After the marriage nko? You people are not wise. Neither are you manly at all. In fact, I have never seen a weaker generation of men than those of this generation. From asking a woman what she is bringing to the table to saying their wives should share bills 50-50 with them to being so easy to manipulate or get riled up! Terrible!

Hmmm! In every action, there is an equal or opposite reaction.

Let me leave u with a statement from a Philosopher that goes:

If u found urself in an uncomfortable situation, u have either of these four options to choose from:
1. Fix it
2. Change how u feel about it
3. Accept it
4. Continue to feel uncomfortable about it.

Any which way, the ball is in ur court. U best know what suit ur situation.

Wish u wisdom as u paddle the canoe of the result from the mistakes u made.

OP's story is too detailed to be true. That's not how a Nigerian narrates a personal experience.

Fake news!

Kyng1:
Good evening nairalanders, I'm sorry but this is going to be quite an episode.

I got married barely two months ago, February precisely. I'm In my late thirties, 28 years precisely and my wife Is 24 years old, during the buildup and period of my marriage there was lot's of problems and confusion.

It started when my wife. (then girlfriend) got pregnant (September precisely) immediately after we found out things seems to be going smoothly until November last year when she popped the question "when are we getting married" I told her that I'm not yet ready for marriage but I'm willing to do introduction, that night was hell for me.

Note, it wasn't hell and shocking to me because of what happened that night, it was shocking to me because it was the very first time she asked me such a question, and her reaction was shocking to me. If she has previously asked me this particular question severally and I'm not telling her what she wanted to hear I'd have understood why she reacted In such a way and manner, but it was the very first time she was throwing that question on me.

Back to what happened that night. Immediately I told her that I wasn't ready for marriage she started crying and laying curses on me, that I'm wicked, after suffering with me etc, then I responded that she never suffered with me that this should be the very last time that she should utter such word, I said so because she has been uttering it frequently on any slight quarrel, but on that faithful night, I couldn't take it any longer I told her that you suffered with me and I have two A.C on both parlor and room before I met you, that you suffered with me and I have a 75 inch TV, freezer, inverter, luxury center table, dstv etc. You suffered with me because of what, that I'm living in a self contain, or don't have my own house or car. This is someone that I'm feeding on a daily basis back then that I'm still a tenant and yet to have my own house, we went to eatery to eat almost on a weekly basis, to the extend that she refused to go to her parents house for months.

Back to the topic, she fought me that night from 10pm to 3am, after that night she kept popping up the question almost on a daily basis and it always leads to quarrel, arguments and fights, it came to a point that she began threatening me with suicide, holding knife that she's going to stab herself, using rope to tie her neck with all her strength which normally ends with her having reddish eye's, coughing, etc until I intervene, there was a day she drank tiles wash liquid, and hypo, that night I gave her oil, and nothing happened to her, that was the deal breaker, I finally agreed to proceed with the marriage, because I was scared that If anything should happen to her then I'd go to prison for the rest of my life and my life Is over.

Note I have 4.3 million naira on my account as at then, and I intend using the money to start up a business, as I wasn't doing anything. It is also worthy to note that after lots of pressure it came to a point that I no longer tells her that I'm not ready for marriage but started telling her that I don't have money, but her response was always, "na lie, na lie, na lie" you get money. She has seen my debit alert and saw my balance. So after she drank the hypo and chemical used for tiles wash, I agreed to proceed with the marriage.

By December, I began making marriage preparations, the adrenaline rush was something else. I went to the village to inform my father people, so they can come to perform the traditional rights, as my father was no more.

On the day of the traditional marriage, her mother called me early in the morning that I need to carry some drinks to my "girlfriend, now wife" father house that she'll support me with one wine, that she's doing it because I'm complaining that I don't have money, I took two carton of Heineken, two carton of maltina one wine + the wine she supported me with and two Gordon gin. "I have no idea that I was being brain washed, they're the one's that's supposed to present those and I'd have to double it during the traditional rights, she deceived me.

Before the traditional marriage began, my father's people that's supposed to perform the traditional rights didn't arrive on time due to the distance they're coming from, her mom was already angry, few minutes later my father's people eventually arrived, immediately after their arrival "my girlfriend, now wife" elder brother made a statement which provoked me, he said "if una nor one marry make una dey go, I go pay una all the money when una dun spend, rubbish"

Immediately I heard that, I took off my agbada remaining my inner senator shirt and trouser that I'm not doing again, her mom starter ranting and raining all sorts of insults on me, she made a statement that I should never near or come close to her ever again. After some few minutes my mom calmed me down and I put on my agbada again.

Few minutes later the traditional rites began, I was inside when my younger brother came to inform me that my wife half brother's have opened and drank some of the gins I brought for the traditional rites, I Immediately told him to count and look for somewhere to buy and have them replaced, he did and before he came back they have taken more. He had to go back and have the gins replaced a second time. Immediately after the end of the traditional marriage her mom handed me a nylon with 100 notes not up to 3,000 naira and she handed my wife another that's filled to the brim, that the one she gave to me was what they sprayed me and the one for her was what they sprayed her, I was in rage and I gave the nylon to her that how can she share money spared between husband and wife, she gladly collected the money. Shortly after that, I heard her elder sister, the one my wife is following directly by birth, saying "that her sister (my wife) don't know what she has gotten herself into, I Immediately cut her short that what kind of statement is that and what next she did? She started raining all sorts of insults on me " Daniel you dey craze, Daniel your head nor correct, Daniel na God go punish you, Daniel you be bastard, we go tie you flog we go lock you up" she repeated these words continously, she pulled her slippers and wanted to come and fight me, In which they held her off. This is someone that isn't up to the age of my younger brother, I felt really embarrassed because all my friends, brother's, sisters and my mom was there. Note that I single handedly carried every single expenses of the marriage, the only expense my wife family all agreed and contributed to was making "jotters notes" for the guests that sprayed us money, which they didn't do, until date I didn't saw any jotter, not even one.

Another thing that really got me angry was few weeks before the marriage my wife mom was assuring me that there's no need to cook, that we only have to cook for reception only, which I fully agreed. But at same time I send my mom some money to prepare something just in case things didn't went as planned and because of my father's people that's coming from distance.

Two day's to the traditional marriage I sent her 490,000 naira for chicken and ingredients. Note, I have already bought two bags of rice and 2 gallons of groundnut Oil for cooking at the reception whereas I gave my mom half bag of rice as back up and three cartons of chicken for the reception refreshment. But to my surprise I saw that she, my wife mother cooked jollof rice at the traditional marriage day and while sharing she was talking continously, that I'm supposed to give her money to cook but I didn't gave her any money that she cooked the rice with her own money. I was in rage because firstly I sent her 490,000 to cook for the reception, in which she used my chicken, groundnut Oil, and ingredients to cook the jollof rice she cooked at the traditional marriage day, she only used her two basket of rice which they already have at home. And because of that two basket of rice she was downgrading me in front of my father's people, my mother's people, my brothers, sisters, friends. If she had told me that she wanted to cook rice at the traditional marriage I'd have gladly sent her the money, If I can send 490,000 for just chicken and ingredients, what's 14,000 that I can't send for two baskets of rice, this was someone that told me we aren't cooking anything on the traditional marriage day but only for the reception.

Also, before the marriage my wife mother has already arranged for us doing court weeding, which I wasn't comfortable with but since my wife was pregnant and she insist that she must wear a white weeding gown, our both churches refused to Wed us with her wearing a white wedding gown with pregnancy. So I had no choice than to settle for the court weeding that her mother proposed, but 3 weeks to the weeding my elder sister talked to her pastor and he agreed to wed us with her wearing a white weeding gown and with her pregnancy, I informed my wife and she was angry, It lead to lots of quarrels but I stood on my ground that I'm no longer proceeding with the court weeding. 4 days later I saw a chat with my wife and her elder sister, she was telling my wife that I refused to do court weeding because of the rubbish that I'm thinking that their mother said she isn't going to attend and she her self won't attend. I snapped the chat and pretended like I didn't noticed but waiting to see how everything unfolds, on the day of the weeding, her mom didn't appear in church, neither her 3 sisters. But they all came to the reception ground, at the reception when they were spraying they focused on her only, my wife mom and her sisters, none of them sprayed me, not even 50 naira, but I sprayed my wife mom. I'm not saying this because I'm expecting the money, I'm saying this because as their sister husband they're supposed to spray us both, it felt embarrassing when they were dancing and spraying only her and I was just there like I'm nothing.

Less I forget, on the morning of the reception which was the day after our traditional marriage, I called the MC and explained everything that transpired on the traditional marriage. "her mom, sharing money that was sprayed between us" and gave him names to announce as those that'd pick any money that was sprayed, I didn't included any of her sisters neither mine. My wife was angry and asked me severally to include one of her sister which I plainly disagree, she became cold, and on the reception day refused to dance. When the marriage was over we counted the money and it was 233,100 naira. For a marriage I spent 4 million plus. After everything my wife started mocking me that they've stolen my money that I think I'm wise by not allowing her sister to be among those picking money, she mocked me endlessly and started using her hands on her eye's to tell me "onwonyi" I told her that I'm not doing again that I'm returning her bride price and she called me by my name daring me to return it. I was in rage and started remembering when she was pleading with me to marry her and remove shame from her eye's, in my mind this was someone that was begging me to marry her few weeks ago, threatening to commit suicide, now daring me to return her bride price and now mocking me. I slapped her that night on our hotel room, and she fought with me for hours, and the next day she reported me to my younger brother and her best friend, the one that did chief bridesmaid for her, that I beat her on our weeding night.

Days passed, weeks passed, two months has started passed since the day of our weeding and I'm now living from hand to mouth, this same woman that was telling me back then that we'd live as a couple that even if it's Garri that we've we'll soak it and no one will know or hear about it, is now the one crying for food whenever she's hungry, she doesn't eat rice without eggs or meat, nor does she eats Eba talk more of Garri. Right now I felt deceived, manipulated into a marriage that I wasn't actually ready for, I'd have invested my 4 million into something tangible and reaping the fruit by now, right now there's no money to eat properly or go out on Sundays to have some bottles of achohol.

We're querrelling almost on a daily basis, there's no peace, sometimes I do sleep at my brother's place to have that few hours of peace than to go home to her, but it's been since a month I last did that. Recently I have been informing her that I'll return her bring price and I'm not marrying again, that marriage isn't by force that I wasn't even ready to get married if not for her suicide manipulation, that I'm just waiting for her to give birth and after 6 months I'd return her bride price, but she think I'm joking. I'm sure going to surprise her. After all I'm not sexually attracted to her, she's short, not fat and not slim either, and fair. And I I'm sexually attracted to extremely fat, dark or chocolate skinned ladies. I find myself getting extremely aroused by just staring at the pictures of fat ladies on Instagram or anywhere I come across them, on the internet, bike, etc. But my wife totally naked and close to me doesn't in anyway arouse me, not even slightly. Until date I can't get over the 4 million naira plus that I spent marrying her, it hurts me a lot till this very moment.

And for what her mom did by deceiving me to be the one to bring drinks, wines, and gin and also the one that have them replaced, by lying to me and insulting me in front of my family that I didn't gave her any money to cook because of two basket of rice she cooked, by sharing money for I and my wife etc, since the day of our marriage until date I haven't visited her, and since then also my wife also refused to visit my mom or my family because I refused to visit her mom. My mom has pleaded with me on several occasions to visit her and apologize, but I don't know why I should apologize to someone who tricked and insulted me. Right now I really wished to know if I did the right thing by not going to see her until date or just overreacting. Please I need your honest answers on this.

i think both of you must make the effort to make it work. There is no guarantee she would visit your mum if you do. Right now nurse her so that she can give safe birth.

you don go marry out of pity.


You will see shege, meanwhile prepare money for DNA test when the baby arrives.

in other words, your eyes wee peel

Baba if you can leave that girl you will see how fast you will bounce back. Me as a person my destiny hardly live with a woman. What I mean is that I prefer my space. That your wife has a negative energy, her whole family has a negative energy against you so to be honest it will be hard for good things to come your way. I will advice you to end that marriage bro.

Kyng1:



So, no solution? But If I choose to quit the marriage will the family agree to return my bride price?

Nigga shut the bleep up and stop talking like a simp. What's the meaning of bride price? B.P is nothing but word used to manipulate men. Whether they give you bride price or not dump her. I didn't collect any bride price after dumping my ex and we also got divorced at the court. Stop talking like a kid and man up..

That onhonyi word is synonymous to the deltans if my brain serves my correctly.


Truth's you're going to be miserable for the rest of your life unless you go your separate ways.

You really are a very unserious person, and this your wife needs to be protected from you!

On a different note, @Kyng1, I think you should consider writing stories as a gig. I mean I enjoyed reading your OP. It was very long and detailed. And someone with that talent of yours could make good money writing even manga or short stories https://culturedworks.com/god-of-autopsy-chapter-01/

I guess all the people commenting have not checked the OPs previous posts. The wife of OP is the most unlucky w0man to marry a man like him. Her life/health is in danger, because the OP has herpes virus and other STDs which he got from 4 different pr0stitutes.

LilMissFavvy:
I guess all the people commenting have not checked the OPs previous posts. The wife of OP is the most unlucky w0man to marry a man like him. Her life/health is in danger, because the OP has herpes virus and other STDs which he got from 4 different pr0stitutes.

Stevenbright:


Guy enough of the manipulation. You don't need to apologize to anybody.

What you need right now is to fix your life and your home.

Truth be told, you were manipulated both by your wife and her mom. They knew they had little to contribute to the wedding but they manipulated you to do it all by trick while putting you down in front of people to make it look as if they did some while you have not done enough.

The drink they are supposed to provide, they made you do it. They informed you not to worry about cooking food on the trad day while her mum used part of what you already provided for reception food to cook on that the trad day while pretending she used her resources for it just to make it look like they contributed something.

So, look inward to see what you can do to start earning again. Move on and stop thinking about what you spent on the wedding.

Don't even plan to return the bride price and send her away except she is making life difficult for you. Overtime, you will be fine with her except she is not ready to cooperate and make the family grow and fulfilled. Otherwise, sending her away means you will have to repeat that same process again with another woman in the nearby future.

My point is first try to make the marriage work and make sure henceforth, she is not able to manipulate you again. If she refused to change for good, then you know the right thing to do for yourself.

Firstly, thank you so very much for understanding the depth of this whole issue, your understanding levels is super amazing.

I did every single thing, but my wife mother talked down on me in front of my friends and siblings just so they could think that she contributed something tangible to the weeding, where as I did every single thing.

She tricked me into providing the drinks they're supposed to have provided.

Of everything that she did, I'm deeply hurt the most by her claiming that I didn't gave her money to cook on the traditional day that I'm supposed to give her money to cook, but didn't. Where as we both have none of such agreement, on that day she cooked two basket of rice with my ingredients, chicken, groundnut Oil. Etc. From what she was supposed to use to prepare the reception food.

To be brutally honest with you, I have tried getting over the money I spent for the marriage but I just can't, the more in trying to get it over with the more it keeps ringing a bell.

As for my wife, she is not giving me problems. At first she's but ever since I told her that after giving birth I'd send her back to her mother's house, she has been behaving well since then, and definitely want the marriage to work out. The only thing currently causing problems between is is the fact that she's always all over me, as we're both always at home. Where as I'm someone that love being alone all the time without anyone around or anyone talking to me. I'm a loner. This is the only thing that's currently causing problems.

Tobijah2:
Your wife is from a toxic home and she has that attribute in her, their is nothing you will do to please her because of her entitled mentality and that's why she always threatens you with suicide. She and her family will show you shege bt be man enough and stand on your right. Don't let her control you and always stick to your decision provided they are in order. Put your self together and know how best to handle her and her family and remember you are responsible for your decisions.

Thank you so very much, I have promised myself already that any decision I make from now henceforth, I will stand by it and nothing and absolutely nothing will make me change my mind, my decision will always stand, unlike before. A good example of this is that after agreeing to do the marriage, I optioned for traditional marriage only, but the mother refused. If I had stood on my ground as a man and done only the traditional marriage by now I'd have only spent half of the money I spent and won't be in this mess that am into right now.

michlins:
Guy, na you do yourself. Yes sir, you do yourself. You saw all the signs but walked into the fire with your two eyes wide open.

You go suffer oh

Boss, I was scared. Whenever this girl contemplate suicide she's always serious about It. Previous experience and memories gave me chills.