Like the topic says, I just wanted to share a traumatic experience that made me lose faith in humanity.

There is this particular cultural habit I absolutely despise: the practice of inviting anyone who visits you to come and eat. It's a common gesture in our culture, meant to show hospitality, not to be taken literally. As Africans, we are known for our kindness and generosity, and offering food to visitors is a part of that tradition. Typically, when I visit someone and they're eating, I'll decline with the customary "thank you," understanding that the meal wasn't prepared with my visit in mind. I’m supposed to have eaten before visiting.

But this culture makes little sense to me. One Sunday, a long time ago, I almost shed tears because of it. I went to church without having eaten anything, and the service was delayed. I became ravenously hungry—the kind of hunger that blocks your ears so you can't even hear what the pastor is preaching. I was already fantasizing about the dodo and Indomie with fried eggs I was going to prepare when I got home. The mere thought of the food made my mouth water. I didn't want to leave church early, fearing people might think I was the demon pressing church members in their sleep.

Church ended at 1:30 PM, and I was the first one out the door, rushing to the street where my car was parked.

"Brother Segun!" I heard my name called as I hurried out. I turned to see a church member, Brother Isaac. "We have a brothers' meeting after church," he said. I quickly made up an excuse and rushed past him, heading home to fry my plantain and eggs.

At home, I grabbed the soft plantain and three eggs, fried two, and boiled the last one, adding a can of sardines. I opened two sachets of Indomie noodles and started whistling while the food was getting ready.

After about 30 minutes, the food was ready, and I was already eating in my subconscious. The aroma was heavenly. I dished the hot noodles onto a flat porcelain plate, arranged the yellow soft plantain around the noodles like a football stadium, added the fried eggs with the boiled egg sitting on top like a king on a throne. I went to the fridge to get a chilled bottle of Pepsi when suddenly, I heard my doorbell ring.

My heart skipped a beat and sank into my stomach as I sighed in frustration. "Who could this be?" I wondered. I wasn't expecting any visitors! Why couldn't I just enjoy this delicious meal in peace? I trudged to the door, dragging my feet and sulking like a teenager on an unpleasant errand. I opened the door and standing right there was a church member, Mr. Johnson, and his wife! WTF! We just saw each other at church! Why won't these people let me be?

I let them in, and Mr. Johnson's eyes immediately went to my food on the dining table as the sweet aroma filled the room.

We greeted each other, chit-chatted about the sermon and the church service, and out of courtesy, I made the biggest mistake of my life. I uttered those three words that would ruin my entire day: "Come and eat."

I genuinely expected the customary "thank you" so I could return and finish my food. But to my horror, Mr. Johnson and his wife didn't say "thank you." Instead, they stood up, shuffled their feet towards my dining table, sat down, and began to consume my delicious Indomie. My whole world came tumbling down. Silently, I seethed with anger as these people, who might have already had their own lunch, devoured my food.

I lost faith in humanity that day. What happened to a simple "thank you"? Shouldn't these people have known that my invitation was just a mere customary gesture and not meant to be taken literally? I watched as my beautiful plantain disappeared one bite at a time into Mr. Johnson's mouth. My crispy yellow fried eggs—gone. I struggled hard to control myself. They were even smacking their lips. Can you imagine the audacity?

To add salt to the wound, Mr. Johnson's wife reached for my chilled Pepsi, removed the cap, and took a big gulp. She sighed deeply, "Hmmmm!" My eyes popped out of their sockets. Right then and there, my whole world stopped. My Pepsi! Oh my God, my chilled Pepsi! I wailed internally.

I knew at that moment that our friendship was over and Mr. Johnson was never welcome in my home again. Can you imagine? Where exactly did I go wrong in practicing our culture?

They ate all the noodles, down to the last egg, and had the sheer temerity to thank me while I was forced to smile sheepishly and respond, "Don't mention it."

After the meal, they started a conversation while I silently cursed in my mind. I couldn't wait for them to leave. About an hour later, they finally stood up to go. I escorted them downstairs and returned to my apartment. I slammed my living room door with a loud thud, flung the empty Pepsi bottle at the wall in annoyance, and watched it shatter into pieces on the floor.

I was livid, so angry that I was drained of energy. I couldn't bring myself to prepare another meal, considering the effort I had put into that particular dish.

That was the end of Mr. Johnson's visits to my home. I even changed churches because of that singular experience, as I was triggered every time I saw him and his wife. I have since stopped inviting people to come and eat and will never, under any circumstances, answer the door while enjoying a delicious meal, no matter who it is. Once bitten, twice shy.

Has anyone ever had such an experience?

Most "come and eat" does not mean you should really come and eat.

Next time, return the food to the kitchen before answering the door


✌️

ForValour:
Most "come and eat" does not mean you should really come and eat.

Many people forget that when confronted with a delicious food.

illicit:
Next time, return the food to the kitchen before answering the door


✌️

I nor they even answer door again when eating, I roll all the curtains down even.

Lol.. this is so hilarious. Before you make such offer be sureyounhaveextra 😂.thatis why when I cook I always cook for two in case. If only they looked up and saw your face. Lol.. you could have just offered them drinks. Very funny piece I haven't had a good laugh since morning

Lol 😆🤣😂😹😆
This is quite hilarious. Since you weren't expecting anyone, you should have kept mute.

If i am alone and not expecting any visitor, when i hear a knock on the door, I'll quietly peep to see who's at the door through a hidden channel. When i see an unwelcomed face, i quietly go back and relax.

fyzaila:
Lol 😆🤣😂😹😆
This is quite hilarious. Since you weren't expecting anyone, you should have kept mute.

If i am alone and not expecting any visitor, when i hear a knock on the door, I'll quietly peep to see who's at the door through a hidden channel. When i see an unwelcomed face, i quietly go back and relax.

My car was in the compound and they knew I was at home. It would have amounted to a lack of regards if I did not answer the door. I have since learned my lessons. RIP to my noodles and fried eggs!

This isn't funny at all as l was once in the shoes of Mr and Mrs Johnston.

I went to visit one of my mummies at her house and immediately l entered, she offered me bananas. I was already full cos l had eaten before leaving my house, but out of courtesy, l picked up the banana and one after the other, l ate them all. I thought refusing her offer would mean an insult.


l had finished devouring the bananas before realising she might actually wanted to break her fast with the banana before l got to her house. Of course she had the banana on her dining table before l got there!!

This realisation made me sick and l felt like throwing up the eaten banana.

I never visited her house again till date partly out of shame.

Bodydiialect57:
This isn't funny at all as l was once in the shoes of Mr and Mrs Johnston.

I went to visit one of my mummies at her house and immediately l entered, she offered me bananas. I was already full cos l had eaten before leaving my house, but out of courtesy, l picked up the banana and one after the other, l ate them all. I thought refusing her offer would mean an insult.


l had finished devouring the bananas before realising she might actually wanted to break her fast with the banana before l got to her house. Of course she had the banana on her dining table before l got there!!

This realisation made me sick and l felt like throwing up the eaten banana.

I never visited her house again till date partly out of shame.

I always decline out of courtesy and if the host really want me to eat, they might pressurize or insist and then I will just take a few bites to maintain my respect. Even If you invite me to your birthday, I am coming with cooked food and bottles of wine for other guests.

Sapasenator:


My car was in the compound and they knew I was at home. It would have amounted to a lack of regards if I did not answer the door. I have since learned my lessons. RIP to my noodles and fried eggs!

😄🤣
Indeed rip

Bodydiialect57:
This isn't funny at all as l was once in the shoes of Mr and Mrs Johnston.

I went to visit one of my mummies at her house and immediately l entered, she offered me bananas. I was already full cos l had eaten before leaving my house, but out of courtesy, l picked up the banana and one after the other, l ate them all. I thought refusing her offer would mean an insult.


l had finished devouring the bananas before realising she might actually wanted to break her fast with the banana before l got to her house. Of course she had the banana on her dining table before l got there!!

This realisation made me sick and l felt like throwing up the eaten banana.

I never visited her house again till date partly out of shame.

So what happened to taking just one & pretend the rest aren't there. U get ojukokoro jor

Sapasenator:


I always decline out of courtesy and if the host really want me to eat, they might pressurize or insist and then I will just take a few bites to maintain my respect. Even If you invite me to your birthday, I am coming with cooked food and bottles of wine for other guests.

I learned my lesson as l don't even eat out again.

CheedyJ:

So what happened to taking just one & pretend the rest aren't there. U get ojukokoro jor

Lols. Not ojúkòkòrò jor.

I should have done as you said but l felt it was a dishonour to decline her offer. I didn't even like the Banana sef as l forced myself to eat it just to please her.

I learned my lesson anyway

People believe it is impolite not to offer visitors your food when visiting your home. The expectation is to say, Thanks, I just eat before leaving home and my tummy is really full. something along that line.

If na me I no go open the door in the first place.

Clinghton:
If na me I no go open the door in the first place.

Na family friend na and I was curious about the visit. My only fvuck up was the invitation.

Sapasenator:
OK, like the topic goes, I just wanted to narrate a traumatic experience that made me lose faith in humanity.

There is this particular culture I absolutely despise, the culture of inviting anyone who visits you to come and eat. It happened for real and I never bothered to change the name.

I know as Africans, we are hospitable and supposed to be kind and offer our food to visitors, it was supposed to be a kind of a cultural gesture not to be taken at face value, like when I go visiting people and I find them eating, I usually would decline with the customary "thank you", when invited to participate.
After all, the meal was not prepared anticipating my visit. I was supposed to had had my meal at home before paying a visitation. I know the African hospitality and shits but this culture makes little sense to me.

There was an experience long time ago and almost shed tears on this day. It was a Sunday, I had gone to church without any food and the service was delayed so I became ravenously famished, you know the kind of hunger that blocks your ears that you could not even hear what the pastor was preaching the rest of the church service, I was already thinking of the dodo and Indomie with fried eggs i was going to prepare when I got home and the mere thoughts of the food made saliva well up in my tongue. I did not want to just step out of the church so people don't get the idea I was the demon pressing church members in their sleep.

Church ended at 1.30pm, I was the first out of the door rushing to the street where my car was parked.

Brother Segun! I heard my name called as I hurried out and I swiverled around to see a church member, Bro. Isaac, "we have a brothers meetings after the church? He said!
I just made up an excuse rushed passed him heading home to fry mr yellow plantain and eggs .

At home, I grabbed the soft plantain, three eggs, fried two and had to boil the last one and also added a can of Sardine. I opened two sachets of Indomie noodles and started whistling while the food was getting ready.

After about 30 minutes, the food was ready and I was already eating in my subconscious, the aroma was heavenly and I dished the hot noodles on a flat porcelain plate, arranged the yellow soft plantain around the noodle like a football stadium, added the fried eggs with the boiled egg sitting on top like a king would sit on a throne. i went to the fridge to get a bottle of chilled Pepsi and suddenly, I heard my doorbell rang.

My hear skipped a bit and sank into my stomach as I sighed in frustration!

Who could this be?, I ruminated slowly in my mind? I was not expecting any visitors! I mused. Why shouldn't I be allowed to devour this delicious food in peace for chrisssakke! I trudged to the door, dragged my feet and sulking like a teenager being sent on an unpleasant errand. Got to the door, opened and standing right at my door step was a church member, Mr. Johnson and his wife! Wtf!, I just returned from church and we saw each other! Why won't these people let me be.

What are these people doing at my home?, I opened the door and let them in. Mr Jonson eyes immediately went to my food on the dining as sweet the aroma hung everywhere.

We greeted, chit chatted, talked about the sermon and the church service and out of courtesy, I made the biggest mistake of my life, I uttered those three words that would ruin my entire day.

"Come and eat"

I was genuinely expecting the customary "thank you" so I could return and finish my food but in muted horror, Mr. Jonson and his wife never said "thank you", they stood up , shuffled their feets towards my dinning table, sat down and begin to consume my delicious Indomie. My whole world came tumbling down and silently ,

I was seething with anger while these people, who might have had their own lunch, silently devoured my food.
I lost faith in humanity that day! What happened to a simple thank you? shouldn't these people have known that my invitation was just a mere customary gesture and, never meant to be taken at face value? I watched as my beautiful plantain dissapeared one chew at a time into the ravenous mouth of the fvking Mr. Jonson, my crispy yellow fried eggs, I struggled very hard to control myself. They were even smirking their lips, can you imagine the audacity.

To add Cameroon pepper into an already festering wound, Mr. Jonson's wife extended her left hand, reached for my sweaty orobo Pepsi, removed the cap, and wrapped her sausage fingers around my precious Pepsi. She closed her eyes and took a big gulp, exhaled in a deep sigh, Hmmmm! my eyes popped in their sockets, suddenly, right there and then, my whole world stopped. My Pepsi! Omg! my chilled Pepsi, I wailed internally.

I knew at the spot that our friendship was over and Mr. Jonson was never welcomed in my home ever again. Can you imagine? Where exactly did I go wrong in practicing our culture?

I watched them eat all the noodle to the last egg and even had the sheer temerity to thank me while I was forced to smile sheepishly with the response "don't mention"

After the meal, they started conversation while I went into a cursing mode deep within my mind, I could not wait for them to finish and get out of my house. About an hour after my meal, they stood up to leave, I escorted them downstairs and came back to my crib. I slammed my living room door with a loud thud, flung the empty Pepsi bottle on the wall in annoyance and the shattered remains came crashing to the floor.

I was livid with anger, so angry that that I got slapped of my energies, I couldn't even bring myself to prepare another meal considering the efforts I had put into that particular food.

That was the end of Mr. Jonson's visit to my home, I even had to change church because of that singular experience as I became triggered every time I laid eyes on the man and his wife.
I have since stopped inviting people to come and eat and will never, under any circumstances answer the door while having a delicious meal no matter the person.
Once bitten , twice shy!

Has anyone ever had such an experience?

Sorry bro. This na bitter experience.

MMempire:

Sorry bro. This na bitter experience.

Thanks my man.

Come join us to eat is an African culture you can't change. Serpent head Segun, you can go to stay in Europe if you don't like that aspect of African culture.

onuman:
Come join us to eat is an African culture you can't change. Serpent head Segun, you can go to stay in Europe if you don't like that aspect of African culture.

Is that all?

Honestly, I am on a crusade to have a lot of cultures changed in Nigeria. Culture should evolve to serve us not the other way round. With all our cultures, we cannot still govern ourselves effectively, Is that not a shame?

YOU'RE SELFISH, THAT IS THE BANE OF CHRISTIANITY, TELL ME IF IT WAS MUSLIMS THAT HAD THAT EXPERIENCE ALL OF THEM WILL PUT HAND TOGETHER TO EAT THAT FOOD AND BE SATISFIED, BECAUSE THEY LOVE EACH OTHER.

SECONDLY, IF IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL LADY YOU WANTED TO LAY(SIN) THAT CAME IN YOU WOULDN'T FEEL THAT WAY.

YOU NEED TO CHANGE YOUR MENTALITY AND PRACTICE LOVE.

Something is seriously wrong with you oga

capnies:
YOU'RE SELFISH, THAT IS THE BANE OF CHRISTIANITY, TELL ME IF IT WAS MUSLIMS THAT HAD THAT EXPERIENCE ALL OF THEM WILL PUT HAND TOGETHER TO EAT THAT FOOD AND BE SATISFIED, BECAUSE THEY LOVE EACH OTHER.

SECONDLY, IF IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL LADY YOU WANTED TO LAY(SIN) THAT CAME IN YOU WOULDN'T FEEL THAT WAY.

YOU NEED TO CHANGE YOUR MENTALITY AND PRACTICE LOVE.

he's a mad man, I doubt if such a thing ever happened as many people live off social media clout these days and in the case of Nairaland, a hope of making it to front page but at least we have an idea of his thought process

capnies:
YOU'RE SELFISH, THAT IS THE BANE OF CHRISTIANITY, TELL ME IF IT WAS MUSLIMS THAT HAD THAT EXPERIENCE ALL OF THEM WILL PUT HAND TOGETHER TO EAT THAT FOOD AND BE SATISFIED, BECAUSE THEY LOVE EACH OTHER.

SECONDLY, IF IT WAS A BEAUTIFUL LADY YOU WANTED TO LAY(SIN) THAT CAME IN YOU WOULDN'T FEEL THAT WAY.

YOU NEED TO CHANGE YOUR MENTALITY AND PRACTICE LOVE.

Someone else eat my food and I am the selfish one.

Wow, wow, wow!

A perfect example of a lopsided reasoning! No Muslim has ever offered me free food!

Funny story!!!

But you see that habit of church people visit without prior notice like they are looking to catch you in sin ehn it's not funny at all I don't like it at all.

Proserpina:



Funny story!!!

But you see that habit of church people visit without prior notice like they are looking to catch you in sin ehn it's not funny at all I don't like it at all.

Especially when we just saw each other in the church some few hours ago, that kain visitation dey vex me.