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Lessions - Jokes Etc - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumEntertainmentJokes EtcLessions (1064 Views)

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Lessions by Benheart1(op): 4:35pm On Sep 08, 2006
CORPORATE LESSON #1:
_______________________________

A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is
Finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. After a few
Seconds of arguing over which one should go and answer the
Doorbell,

The wife gives up, quickly wraps herself up in a towel
And runs Downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, The next door Neighbor.

Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800 Just to Drop that towel that you have on". After thinking for
A moment, The woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. Bob has a close look at her for a few seconds, hands Over $800 and Quietly leaves.

Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the Woman wraps Back up in the towel and goes upstairs. When she gets
Back to The bathroom, her husband asks from the shower "Who was that?"

"It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies.
"Great," the husband says, "did he say anything about The $800 He owes me?"
_______________________________
MORAL OF THE STORY:
______________________________

Share critical credit infrmation with your Stakeholders to
Prevent Avoidable exposure!

************************************************
_______________________________

CORPORATE LESSON # 2
_______________________________

A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side Of the road, He stopped and offered her a lift which she gladly
Accepted. She Got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open And reveal a lovely Leg. The priest had a look and nearly had an accident. After controlling The car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The Nun looked at Him and immediately said, "Father, remember psalm 129?" The priest was flustered and apologized profusely.

He forced himself to remove his hand. However, he was unable to Remove his eyes from her leg. Further on, while changing gear, he let his hand slide Up her Leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember Psalm 129?" O nce again the priest apologized. "Sorry sister, but The mind is weak."

Arriving at the convent, the nun got out, gave him a meaningful Glance and went on her way. On his arrival at the
Church, the Priest rushed to retrieve a bible and looked up psalm 129.

It Said,"Go forth and seek; further up, you will find Glory."
_______________________________
MORAL OF THE STORY:
_______________________________

Always be well informed in your job; or, you might Miss great Opportunities!

************************************************
_______________________________
CORPORATE LESSON # 3
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There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German, an American and a French, who found this small genie bottle. When they
Rubbed the Bottle, a genie appears.

Thankful that the 4 guys had Released him Out of the bottle, he said, "Next to you all are 4 Swimming pools, I will give each of you a wish. When you run towards The pool and jump, you shout What you want the pool of water to Become, then
Your wish will come true."

The French wanted to start. He ran towards the pool, jumped and Shouted WINE". The pool immediately changed into a
Pool of wine. The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from The pool.

Next is the Russian's turn, he did the same and Shouted, "VODKA" And immersed himself into a pool of vodka.

The German was next and he jumped and shouted, "BEER".
He was so Contented with his beer pool.

The last is the American. He was running towards the Pool when Suddenly he steps on a banana peel. He slipped towards
The pool And shouted, "SHIT !!!!!!!, "
_______________________________
MORAL OF THE STORY:
_______________________________

Mind your language, you never Know what it will land You in.

************************************************
_______________________________
CORPORATE LESSON # 4
_______________________________

A young executive was leaving the office at 6 PM when He found The CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece
Of paper In his hand.

"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important Document and my secretary has left. Can you make this Thing Work?"
"Certainly, Sir" said the young executive. He turned The machine On, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button. "Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper
Disappeared inside The machine."I just need one copy."
_______________________________
MORAL OF THE STORY:
_______________________________

Never, never assume that your BOSS knows everything
Re: Lessions by iice(f): 4:45pm On Sep 08, 2006
Laughing ma friggin butt off these are hilarious grin grin
Re: Lessions by Benheart1(op): 4:51pm On Sep 08, 2006
so wat u got iice smiley
Re: Lessions by iice(f): 4:55pm On Sep 08, 2006
my bad, ddnt know i was supposed to respond with a joke of mine. Later perhaps
Re: Lessions by Benheart1(op): 5:01pm On Sep 08, 2006
okay then iice expectn yours
grin
Re: Lessions by iice(f): 5:10pm On Sep 08, 2006
ok
Re: Lessions by Benheart1(op): 5:14pm On Sep 08, 2006
iice i'm laughing my head off lol cheesy grin lipsrsealed
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