₦airaland Forum

I think the white girls deserve better than being fodder for Nigerian guys who want to bad mouth Nigerian women. If that's a man's choice, fine, but thankfully not all Nigerian men or women fall into the presumed stereotypes.

^^^ Nice jab!

But truly I think on the average Naija girls have a bad attitude compared to other black girls from other parts

Maybe they thought being stuck up, boning endlessly makes you harder or more respected than others

dayokanu:
But truly I think on the average Naija girls have a bad attitude compared to other black girls from other parts

Maybe they thought being stuck up, boning endlessly makes you harder or more respected than others

You may be right but look closer there are wonderful Nigerian girls available if you know where to look.

That was why I said on the average. There are arrogant ppl from other countries and there are well behaved ppl from Nigeria.

But on the average Naija girls trump it. Some of them even think smiling is a bad thing

dayokanu:
That was why I said on the average. There are arrogant ppl from other countries and there are well behaved ppl from Nigeria.

But on the average Naija girls trump it. Some of them even think smiling is a bad thing

Tell me Abourrritt!

dayokanu:
That was why I said on the average. There are arrogant ppl from other countries and there are well behaved ppl from Nigeria.

But on the average Naija girls trump it. Some of them even think smiling is a bad thing

I don't believe that! maybe because am a female, for example, where i work, the Africans' i meet daily are always nice, whether from Naija or another country (be it male or female). I really don't know where you guys meet these babes that misbehave badly.

After hanging out with a lot of ladies from different parts of africa i can confidently say that nigerian girls on an average have a bad attitude compared to other black girls from other parts. . . .

chaircover:
The irony of the whole thing is that when you as a husband "offend" a white girl she takes you to the cleaners and wipes her mouth clean.

If it were a Naija wifey, she will first report you to your friends, senior brother, then your parents, then your pastor etc giving you chances upon chances to redeem yourself before she makes a move.

Naija girls accept a 1000 things more than a white girl will accept. Reading stories here on NL confirms this.

So we are suppose to be "grateful" she delayed cleaning up what she did not work for?

Giving you "chances" before she takes abi? 

Na fooool dey marry any woman without prenup when living in the West.

At least white girl no fit know about your mansion and estates in Port Harcourt, Johannesburg and Kumasi.

Get a prenup. Period!

N101:
Saga, you should really quit while you're ahead. With each recounted story it's becoming embarrassing.  I hear what you're saying and understand, but I don't get the reactions.  You obviously must move with a very interesting crowd!

@ CC - Regardless of whether they had a domestic or not, there are ways to behave and things you shouldn't do to draw unnecessary attention to yourselves.  Some people simply don't know how to behave in public.

What reactions don't you get?

dayokanu:
But truly I think on the average Naija girls have a bad attitude compared to other black girls from other parts

Maybe they thought being stuck up, boning endlessly makes you harder or more respected than others

They have been brought up to think it is a way to show 'chastity'.

Another reason is some just are drunk at what they perceive as "power". "Basically, I am attractive and you came to me, so I must embarass you as it makes my head high". Then if they are unfortunate to not be married and that attractive goes (as it normally rapidly goes due to our Nigerian foods), then they start going to church looking for their "own husband".

Here is an example of the power drunk ones:

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-745617.32.html#msg9030209

dayokanu:
That was why I said on the average. There are arrogant ppl from other countries and there are well behaved ppl from Nigeria.

But on the average Naija girls trump it. Some of them even think smiling is a bad thing

Hmm!

I can't say too much about this one on most black women. Some girls don't know the power of a smile on a woman's face.

They have such a disturbed face most times and they wonder why people are not coming up to help them carry load.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria?action=dlattach;id=564685;type=avatar

ronkebp:
I don't believe that! maybe because am a female, for example, where i work, the Africans' i meet daily are always nice, whether from Naija or another country (be it male or female). I really don't know where you guys meet these babes that misbehave badly.

I speak for only UK and Naija black women. I know not much about America.

My experience of America was too good when I was in Atlanta. It was at the airport hot black girls were saying "Hi" to me, when they passed me and I was slightly checking them out. I swear I almost tripped and fell over as I was confused because I was coming from London where the attitude on average is horrible.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-554294.32.html#msg7185101

When I went to France for work once. I went out on my own to see if I can feel the club scene and because these yeye French people only go out to dinners and don't do clubs much, there was limited options. They just go out for a wine with friends and sit and chat, so it is hard to really mix as people are out with who they know.

I ended up at a bar. I saw 2 black girls sitting and chatting away, so I went up to them and started with my usual clarification "Non francais, do you speak English". They replied, "a little". So I asked them if it is OK to sit with them that I am from London. They said "yeah" and we ended up chatting with "their little" English all night before I went back to my hotel alone. Their origins were from Mauritania and Comoros.

.

I find this so funny and at the same time odd. I am dissing sagaman but I remember that I was probably just the same way. I never dated Nigerian guys because I found them aggressive and many times as far as I am concerned o uncultured. In my defence though I ended up marrying a Nigerian and I can truly say he is not a "typical" Nigerian man. Who knows what Sagaman has observed. The only thing I can say in defense of these Nigerian girls that give you the stone face is that Nigerian guys seem to not take a hint sometimes. Sometimes the aggressive come on is very uncomfortable. Nigerian guys come from a culture were women tend to be agreeable if they want to be considered a "good girl". Also do not put your hands on a girls body for any reason and think it makes her think you are into her. Some people are turned off by feely touchy especially when they have clearly told you that they are not into you. At the end of the day I think that Nigerian men are just as good as Nigerian women and Nigerian women are just as bad as Nigerian men LOL. For the most part.

^^ why won't you marry a Nigerian? If e no be naija d***k e no fit be like naija d***k, did you notice the difference?

That is the way many Nigerian men treat their wives, like she should be grateful they married her and take care of her most especially when they have some change 8 out of ten times the women are even working if not in coporate offices they at least have shops where they do one business or the other.

I think by being arrogant they think they carry themselves with respect around their home. The irony is when you see them with their girlfriends outside they act all mushy mushy carry all their shopping bags for them and generally act like nice guys and these young girls most often times are not working.

jennykadry:
^^ why won't you marry a Nigerian? If e no be naija d***k e no fit be like naija d***k, did you notice the difference?

LMAO .that is so funny!!!! i know!!!

^^ A trial will conceive you, no wonder the bobo knocked me out less than 3 months after wedding. Even Outstrip sef can testify, see her beaming from ear to ear on threads, that is one way of knowing that her Naija Oga has dealt with her manually in the bedroom, all these women? I sabi them. .Outstrip used to have her pic on her profile, have you seen her chest? afraid catch me the day I saw em, Her oga must have seen them and said "naaaa these cannot end up in the hands of a non Nigerian, i need them to keep my lineage going"

Look at CC that opened thread, have you seen her brake light? Nope, she must have told her kids that hubby and herself are going to buy some more wedding dresses for the naija shops, who knows, their car broke down and they decided to call a mechanic using the room phone of a nearby motel, the rest they say is history

What of debrief nko, after you will see her here complaining that her oga does not let her rest, like say she is not enjoying it, when was the last time she posted?

Ifyalways nko?she do so they na twins the man knock her out with.

Ronke ya turn dey come.

@ isleman.
some men can talk a lot too. I used to knw a guy that talks so much, he doesnt even need u 2 contribute to d discussion.

jennykadry:
^^ A trial will conceive you, no wonder the bobo knocked me out less than 3 months after wedding. Even Outstrip sef can testify, see her beaming from ear to ear on threads, that is one way of knowing that her Naija Oga has dealt with her manually in the bedroom, all these women? I sabi them. .Outstrip used to have her pic on her profile, have you seen her chest? afraid catch me the day I saw em, Her oga must have seen them and said "naaaa these cannot end up in the hands of a non Nigerian, i need them to keep my lineage going"

Look at CC that opened thread, have you seen her brake light? Nope, she must have told her kids that hubby and herself are going to buy some more wedding dresses for the naija shops, who knows, their car broke down and they decided to call a mechanic using the room phone of a nearby motel, the rest they say is history

What of debrief nko, after you will see her here complaining that her oga does not let her rest, like say she is not enjoying it, when was the last time she posted?

Ifyalways nko?she do so they na twins the man knock her out with.

Ronke ya turn dey come.

, My dear my own, knock me up, a month after the wedding ooooo, infact, i can't have enough, , the guy too sabi something******

jennykadry:
^^ why won't you marry a Nigerian? If e no be naija d***k e no fit be like naija d***k, did you notice the difference?

How many times will I tell you that I am a virgin

.

I'm sorry to say this but the average Nigerian girl has a terrible attitude.

I've seen men try to be friendly to Nigerian girls abroad and in Nigeria and get very hostile responses.
Unstable family homes, poverty, lack of trust etc is probably what shaped these people's attitude.

Most people here have been abroad. Don't you see that whites are generally warmer than us?
Nigerian men are not saints but i tell you, most are generally warmer than the women.

I've seen the way men who have never met mingle at parties and exchange numbers.
We women will rather have negative comments to say about other women. It's really annoying.

I go out with my husband and the next thing i know he is chatting with a total stranger like they are fraternal brothers.

@Chaircover
Guilty of also watching people and analyzing their lives.
Sometimes i see a couple and am like, what is this pretty woman doing with this toad of a man? He must be very rich. . .

BlueDiva:
I'm sorry to say this but the average Nigerian girl has a terrible attitude.

I've seen men try to be friendly to Nigerian girls abroad and in Nigeria and get very hostile responses.
Unstable family homes, poverty, lack of trust etc is probably what shaped these people's attitude.

Most people here have been abroad. Don't you see that whites are generally warmer than us?
Nigerian men are not saints but i tell you, most are generally warmer than the women.

I've seen the way men who have never met mingle at parties and exchange numbers.
We women will rather have negative comments to say about other women. It's really annoying.

I go out with my husband and the next thing i know he is chatting with a total stranger like they are fraternal brothers.

@Chaircover
Guilty of also watching people and analyzing their lives.
Sometimes i see a couple and am like, what is this pretty woman doing with this toad of a man? He must be very rich. . .

Thank you for being honest and objective.

I was at a party in Greenwich about 4 months ago. I saw this very, very tall guy. I just had to ask him:

Me: "Hey, are you 6ft 8?"

Tall guy: "Yeah, you are right on the dot".

I just laughed and continued sizing the eles in the place with their killer dressing wey wan kill me.

15 secs later.

Tall guy: "Anyway, Ivan".
Me: "What?" (I heard something "van" but did not know what it meant because I was not expecting it and the music was loud)
Tall guy stretches out his hand for a hand shake.
Tall guy: "I am Ivan".
Me: "Oh, sorry, I am Saga! Are you Nigerian?"
Tall guy: "Yeah. Delta!".

From there we just started chatting like good friends about basketball, about chics, football whatever.


Another one, I was driving home from a friend's place in the Summer. I got to a red light that had 3 lanes, I pulled in the middle lane and noticed the group of guys on my right were checking out some nice chics in the car on my left. I was blasting Timaya in my car, so the guy's were hearing it.

One now said, "Homeboy, move back a bit na, you dey block scenery".

I laughed and said "I wan see to na. na only you get eye". They laughed and said "Omota ni bobo yi sha (This guy is a thug)".

So I moved back a bit so they can all see. I checked out the girls too out of curiosity (one, in particular, was hot) and when green light came, the girls turned and we went straight. At the next traffic light, we just continued joking and I realised they were moving in a convoy with the 2 other cars behind. They asked me where I was going, and when I told them, they said that is their destination as well.

I asked what they were going to do, they said they were going for a BBQ.

Next thing, they said, why don't I come too. And I joked "Babes dey?", they said "Plenty with Shayo".

This is how I joined the convoy and ended up at a BBQ I did not know one single soul from about 4pm till 12 midnight. I bonded so well with everyone (Naija, Ghana, Carri) at the BBQ, the people at the party did not believe I just met those guys just a few hour earlier.

@ Chaircover,

that's the typical marriage relationship in naija for you.
but the folks in question are so conditioned to this kind of dynamic that most of the women don't see anything wrong with it until they move abroad and maybe see how their oyinbo counterparts are doing it. combine this exposure with financial freedom and katakata don burst.

BlueDiva:
Most people here have been abroad. Don't you see that whites are generally warmer than us?
Nigerian men are not saints but i tell you, most are generally warmer than the women.

the oyinbo warmth is mostly superficial to me (maybe because of cultural barriers?). but definitely welcome. I've had tons of experiences similar to the poster who was helped with her luggage by the post man. no naija man will do that for you.

I think both genders have their serious issues.

@ both scenarios in the original post

its a nigerian thing although that doesnt excuse the behaviour.

The men were probably tired or stressed out perhaps.

But such scenes arent unusual in nigeria.

Lovey dovey stuff is actually an oyibo or western thing and not too suited to the harsh nigerian climate.

The men in the original post clearly showed some arrogance.

Other posters have helped to balance out this arrogance thing though. Clearly in the Naija setting, the propensity for arrogance rests with the one with the power.

Pre and during toasting, the power rests with the ladies so that's the likely source of arrogance.

Post toasting/marriage, the power rests with the man which is where the arrogance has come from in this post.

Both men were wrong. My opinion, they are Arrogant!
That's no way to treat a wife, especially not in a public place like the airport. What morals are they teaching their kids? Chaircover may probably not be the only that observed their arrogance. I have seen worst and wonder what the women saw in such men in the first place. Men should learn to treat their wives with respect, the same way a man treats his wife, is the same a stranger or a family member would do, and if someone does not respect your spouse it then means they don't respect you either.

Claus:
The men in the original post clearly showed some arrogance.

Other posters have helped to balance out this arrogance thing though. Clearly in the Naija setting, the propensity for arrogance rests with the one with the power.

Pre and during toasting, the power rests with the ladies so that's the likely source of arrogance.

Post toasting/marriage, the power rests with the man which is where the arrogance has come from in this post.

I like the ''power'' part, it is true, that is why the power thingy should be 50-50. So that nobody is taking the other for granted.

Claus:
Clearly in the Naija setting, the propensity for arrogance rests with the one with the power.

Pre and during toasting, the power rests with the ladies so that's the likely source of arrogance.

Post toasting/marriage, the power rests with the man which is where the arrogance has come from in this post.

what an insight!
very true

Some of them even think smiling is a bad thing

hmm, and you didnt think to wonder why, or what they've seen where they are, that made them stop smiling.


i guess you're not aware your own smiles are being counted.

no be america you dey? Dont worry.

@ original scenarios


insensitivity, which might or might not also include arrogance.


take the suitcase scene for instance.

in a typical nigerian setting, the kids would be the ones handling the suitcases if they're old enough.

the father may have been stressed out from his journey and not really in the mood for the wife's chatter.

just guessing here and it doesnt mean i'm not in support of nigerian men being more considerate to their families.

I've been through all the answers and some really cracked me up. 

The original post itself got me smiling, because my husband is so much like the one in couple A. Not that he is a bad man or anything, he just probably is a little inconsiderate. I still don't quite understand how a man who was treating me like a queen and did anything for me at a blink of an eye would just "not notice" that i am struggling with his heavy luggage, baby in one hand and other stuff on my back. He probably thinks because I used his suitcase to pack all of my girl's stuff is reason enough 

Anyway, my point is, nobody's perfect, my hubby needs a reminder that I need help, sometimes, and that his muscles are welcome to carry an heavy load (and he would make shakara and complain and tell the story for months), but then again, I also make fun of him and it mainly becomes a joke between us. Outside, he likes to be seen as the boss, and I shine with my humility  (lol) at home we just make fun of each other and he is very loving, and attentive, in his own way.

I have a friend whose husband is sooo courteous, polite, helpful when outside. They show a wonderful appearance, anything the lady says, the man does. I was sometimes impressed (let me ask my hubby to fetch something from the kitchen when having dinner with friends!), but then I remember how she calls me every month after their arguments, when he throws insults at her and even beats her.
This is an extreme scenario, but it shows that not-smiling face and not-helpful behavior outside doesn't necessarily mean a bad husband/wife at home and in general.

I even like it now when I try to chat with hubby and he doesn't reply, I know he still listens and I tell all kinds of silly things and watch him try to hide a smile