So I have a big problem my friends and i need help. I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for 20 years, and 15 of which we were in a romantic relationship. Her family is super wealthy, and her parents believed i would always marry her so they trained me and have basically raised me and given me an ivy league education to buying me my first car and house. Her dad even sent my three siblings through college. i live in the states and work as a medical doctor. i do love my girl and that is why we are engaged, but there is a problem. two years ago she got breast cancer and had to go through radiation and other forms of chemotherapy and it really ruined her looks. I dont know if am inlove with her or just feeling pity towards her now. her cancer is now on remission and after what she went through the first time i dont think i can bear to have such a life with a sick wife, am tired. I know her family have helped me and my parents and siblings financially but i dont want to feel obligated to marry her. I dont want to be a bad guy and marry her and then cheat on her. I have prayed on this and yet no answer, even went to the priest in my church and no useful answer. Please advice me, would i be wrong to walk away after almost 20 years of relationship. I am now 35, and she is 32. We are both surgeons, and have been cohabiting in one of her father's houses in the states, my family paid part of her bride price a few years back, but we haven't completed the last rite, and my mom says to hold off if my whole heart isnt in it. The doctor also says that the chemotherapy can hurt her chances of getting pregnant. I dont want to hurt her, but i dont want to feel trapped or like a horrible man. HELP ME- ADVICE ME PLEASE!!

No offense but i think you are ungrateful. I dont know what to say to you, and am shocked that your parents havent stepped in to put some sense in your head. Mtchewww

@OP
i'm sure i can imagine what's going on right now but it's just a shock...
you must know that your next step from now on will affect many people, even generations to come (by this i mean that, if you quit the relationship the lady will be forever dejected and may not live up to 10 years again, the lady's family will be thrown in disarray and anyone that knows of your story will tell it to their children not to help anybody)

Oh... my friend, i'm sorry to tell you the truth... you are really INDEBTED, you just went to the priest to console you. calculate everything you've gained up till now from that family and also calculate how what you've gained has helped other people....
i think the lady's parents have been investing in you for this sole purpose and imagine a business you've invested in for over 20yrs to just crumble... what will happen are these...

1. If they are going down, my friend... you are going down to

2. your siblings who have benefitted from the good tidings may decide to leave you for the lady's family..

3. and oh..., if the lady dies, her mum might follow and the dad might later go with stroke and/ or heart attack...

i'm sure you know that fallasy they call action and reaction, it will practically show itself as reality if you make a single error in judgement..

and... you dont even know how many years you have left, you may even die before the sick lady, why not spend your quality time in loving her, you can save her and many other people that will benefit from her being alive...
what's the essence of life if not to help people, isnt that y you opted for surgery...
If i were you i will believe it's a cross i have to carry... if you even break up with her...
YOU WILL ALWAYS LIVE WITH THAT GUILT AND KNOWING THAT YOU CAUSE (EVEN IF NOT YOU) EVERY MISHAP IN THAT FAMILY...
please rethink, many many people will benefit from your story or curse at the stance of your story...
Goodluck!!!

You are already married to her!
You are co habiting
Her bride price has already been paid
20 years relationship and you want to quit now?

Is that how you would have dumped her if you married her 5years ago?

Is that how heartless and selfish you are?

In this your case, you muSt marry her, even if its out of pity, because you are as good as married already. Imagine if the tables were turned, how would you feel.

Are you sure this is not a test from God? Children are a gift from God, you guys can also afford IVF worst case scenario

If the Breas.t cancer has affected her looks, what happened to plastic surgery? She has an opportunity to look like Nikki Minaj if you so wish.

If you dare dump this lady all the forces of this world will be against you as well as that biatch called Karma! Yes she will be waiting for you in the future!

A word is enough

I could really use a wish right now. I wish You got cas*trated and your WIFE is the one writing this crap right now. Self*ish bas*tard

Just let her mull over things and decide for herself. Who knows? She may really not want the love of her life to be tormented for all time.

I don't think that it'd be such a bad idea, if you gave back a little of that life that she gave you, though. This is when she needs it the most and by God, you know it. A cheat will always cheat, no matter who they're with. So you might as well be doing a little good while/if you're at it.