Zinny25:
u r Welcome. At first some pple advice that once I love him I should go ahead because love was all that matters. I tell you if you are not ready to convert let her go. It was difficult for me to let go too, I was thinking of how to end my life because I felt I loved him and couldn't get anyone better. I must confess it is not easy it took me over a year to forget about him. The truth is that Muslims call us infidel, bro search well faith matters in marriage. Love is not enough. After two years in marriage u will discover it's not just love that is needed. All the best

Thanks once again

delpee:

…Consider all this well to determine if you should forge ahead or move on. May God guide you.

Amen. Thanks for this

Nickky1:
My brother your situation is one of those hopeless situations... you can not get married to a Muslim lady, ...that is the religious perspective from Islamic point of view....

Thanks bro. I actually just learnt about the Islamic view of inter-religion marriages. Though, I had plan to make more findings about it.

Kemyem:
its not easy.....as @zinny25 have said.....am presently going through the same problem...he even told me he will go to church,(he has been to my church on few occasions) and our children will be christians but his parents have more influence over him....recently, he starts to tell me that if i love him, i will follow him to the mosque....and that has resulted in our first fight since meeting 2years ago.....now, i know how important ur partners religion is in a relationship....

Thanks ma.

Zinny25:
u r Welcome. At first some pple advice that once I love him I should go ahead because love was all that matters. I tell you if you are not ready to convert let her go. It was difficult for me to let go too, I was thinking of how to end my life because I felt I loved him and couldn't get anyone better. I must confess it is not easy it took me over a year to forget about him. The truth is that Muslims call us infidel, bro search well faith matters in marriage. Love is not enough. After two years in marriage u will discover it's not just love that is needed. All the best

Thanks ma.

tosyne2much:
So, based on the advice you've received so far, what is your decision?

I hope you don't mind my asking sha?

No p. I'm Still thinking boss. I will have to re-read all posts when I'm more calm, today has been quite hectic.

Kakamorufu:
Do it like dir, take her out, talk, laugh, gist and in the end, tell her your mind, then tell her ur fear and why u haven't told her all this years. Stand up and leave. Wait for her reply afterwards

Thanks for this..

Zinny25:
I'm gonna advice you based on experience. Love is not enough u two are not compatible. I stand to be corrected but let me share my story With u.

Thanks sis.

Piercy:

...So please it depends on her people if they say no.. Then your chances are very slim but not impossible...
Let love lead you

Thanks

bolargeez:
Don't allow religion to lose the love of your life. God is love, you are human first before you are religious. You are going to regret your present decision, when you are older and matured. You will realize one day that you miss out your chance because of nothing. Religion is a state of mind, being good is the ultimate religion.

Thanks for this.

technicallyrich:
You are a yoruba boy.i know these because your cowardice stinks from afar.so you can't even talk in the presence of an hausa girl and tell her how you fell.if it's fulani men now I know that it is normal for you to be afraid because they are your masters.
My advice is for you to go to ibadan and pick up one dirty girl there Atleast you can talk since you and her are yorubas.

We are both yorubas.

Omotayor123:
Don't let religion Robb you of your love. You can regret it for life.

Thanks ma

tosyne2much:
OP, I will advise you cut loose from the relationship because I can see you're the religious...

Thanks sir, I really appreciate your response.

translux:
Let me tell you a story about myself, when I was in Iaspotech back then rounding up my HND, I had 2 girl friends, one is christian, the other Muslim, I...

Thank you sir.

charlesluthor:
bro jst make ur feelns knw to her. we dnt even knw if she loves u. U re jst assuming she loves u. Girls can be confusing. Make ur feelns knwn nd hear her response. afterall, not all relationships leads to marriage

Thanks bro, that"s wat I plan to do.

Pangolo123:
Hi,

Your story was quite similar to mine. I lost out on her because her dad clearly rebuked me not to visit her daughter again. "That, the moment we parted ways in secondary school, we have parted for life, says her dad" Presently, she's married to a believer with 3 beautiful kids, and she's a believer now. She told me l should have been more persistent, perhaps her dad would have supported eventually, which he did with her husband. She said her husband and late dad were very good friends before her dad's death.

Kindly express your heart intentions to her, ask her questions regarding issues relating to her conversion (mustn't be forced please), and raising the kids. If her response is positive in regards to conversion, and she's willing to stand by you - kindly go ahead. However, if she says no to conversion, it would definitely affect how your kids would be raised, in terms of spiritual allegiance. At this point, l would advise there's no point forging ahead.

Aside that, don't forget to do your findings on her family's background please, before you take the major step of securing her heart. I pray God leads you aright. Take care !

Thanks bro for your reply.

KingEbukasBlog:
A lot of reasonable people will tell you that it is proper that people who do not share the same religious beliefs should not get married because of the expected collieries we have witnessed . But there are instances like Mark Zuckerberg (practicing Jew) and his wife Priscilla Chan (Buddhist) and I've got two friends who have Muslim dads and Christian moms - we can see from these instances that the foundation of those marriages is built on love . Love begets religious tolerance and precludes religious bigotry .

But as a Christian do you think you handle the downside of that ? Consider your spiritual growth as a family . And your kids . Which religion will they belong to ? Mum's or dad's ? Or will you give them the freedom to choose theirs ? My friend goes to both Church and the Mosque - can you handle this level of confusion ? And of course , the heated arguments that'd ensue because of your religious differences . People can be very passionate about their religious beliefs . What about religious holidays ? Would you be comfortable with your spouse's religious holiday celebrations ? Would you join her to celebrate ? What if you don't? Can you handle her repulsive reactions and the awkward moments ?

Thanks bro. I will ponder on your questions.

oscaruzie:


...and you had to call her an unbeliever...religion has done a lot of harm, blinded us, put us against brothers and sisters, even dearly loved ones. things like this atheists see and laugh at us 'believers'. God is Love. Allah is Love (at least that's what they say and we wanna believe). so bros, na your hand e dey. e go be later.

Thanks bro. at the bolded; I was quoting a parts of a Bible verse.

AworiLagosian:
I pity you.

Only Yoruba Muslims and Christians are somewhat free to intermarry.

The others... NO GO AREA.

jimcoservices:
If she a Yoruba Muslim, no issue but if the other way round, guy ur death is near

Actually, we are yorubas.

firstking01:
It won't work....just throw in the towel.

My brother, it's easier said than done. Sometimes I just wish our differences will just disappear and we would be together with nothing separating us...it's really a hard decision to let go.

Infomaz:
It takes more than love to make a marriage successful. Like the mathematicians would say... Luv is a necessary but not sufficient condition for marriage.

Can two walk together except they agree? The biblical injunction not to be unequally yoked with an unbeliever is not a suggestion, it is a command given by God to guide against future avoidable problems.

Our faith to a large extent shapes our life's philosophy. Do the two of you share the same vision of life? Views of the role of the man n woman in marriage? How about child upbringing? How would your family prayer life look like? What about relationship with your in-laws n relations? Career n business choice?

You see marriage has so many challenges that it is extremely unwise to burden it with a difference so fundamental as your Faith.

I would advise that you tread cautiously. The commandments of God are not barriers or obstacles to 'enjoyment '. They are like safety rules or fence that protects you from trouble n heartaches....given by an all-knowing God out of love.

I pray you have the wisdom to decide n choose rightly....because more often than not, when it comes to issues of the heart, many are carried away by emotional sentimentalism that defies reason.

God Bless You.

Amen. Thanks bro.

marvin902:
tough case i wont lie..truth be told no matter how we say love has no boundaries it really do have
the fact is one of you will have to sacrifice hes/her religion saying you can do it without her leaving her belief is a recipe for trouble..
buh i do know of a case where the man converted to muslim married the girl and converted back to christian immediately ..
first just way your options and make sure both of you are on the same page

Thanks bro, I think I will first have to admit to her how I feel. I will break the pretence, even if it can't work, I wil just let her know.

ImaIma1:
Hmmm...well in your case you are the guy snd she might end up becoming a Christian. But if she doesn't, there will be differences and clashed. Love is not enough to sustain a marriage. So you have to project fivd yrs down the line...ten years... . I was in love with a muslim guy at one point abd I saw in him a lot of things i wanted in a husband. But i thought about a lot of things like how would we bring up the children...will they be torn between being Christian or Muslim...would my husband and I be able to pray together...etc. and i knew i was never going to convert and so I moved on.
The moral of my story...weigh all the options before making ur decision.

You get it sis, you get it. I do think of things like our children, praying together and stuffs like that. I've actually tried 'moving on', but I just can't. I've tried cutting contact from her, but it didnot work. It's just like torture, everyday torture.

ADAMUdaCOWBOY:
Go ahead man and tell her. Love knows no boundaries. Give it a try and you will be glad you did. No need torturing yourself for years. Make a move now!

You get it bro, it's like torture. My fear actually is how will it work? I guess, We are going to have clashes in philosophies due to differences in religion. We are both attached to our religions, but I'm surprised I can't obey the law that "do not be unevenly attached to unbelievers". Love trully has no boundaries, if we are to be sincere with ourselves.

Thanks for your reply..I really appreciate it.

Hello Nairalanders. Pls I want to share my love story with you. I'm a christian and there is this my high school friend that we grew fond of each while in high school, we had been "just friends".

While in SS3, I was a prefect and she was my assistant. This gave us more time together, back then we never thought of romance, we were just the "serious type" always discussing our studies and helping each other. We were best of friends.

It was during the last days at High School that we realised how attached we had grown to each other, I remember we talked about how we will miss each other in a 'friendly' manner while taking a walk round the school.

In those days, I realised I had more feelings than friendship towards her but I do tell my self that it was just infatuation that once we leave each other, the feeelings will die off and I will perhaps meet someone else.

Four years down the line, we still can't let go of each other, we usually only talked on phone and social media not until some months ago that I decided to pay her a visit in her home.

The visit was so nostalgic, we were delighted to see each other but we both kept on hiding our feelings. I think we are both pretending not to feel anything beyond friendship. This is because of differences in our religion.

I met with her dad, an Alhaji, that day, and we also discussed Nigeria and the waxing hardship, I sense he was quite liberal. Maybe that's because I and his daughter were "just friends".

Now, our calls usually starts well but ends cold, when it's time to say goodbye, we are both pretending towards each other. I know, and I think she knows also.

If we had been of the same religion, I would have made my feelings known to her but I just can't summon the courage to do so now. Our differences in religion didnot stop me from loving her but stopping me from having her.

I would like your suggestions. Have you ever been in such situation before? How did you do it?

Pls I want mature suggestions.

Thanks in advance.