₦airaland Forum

www.moralteachingstories..com a MORAL AND INSPIRATIONAL STORIES CLOg and www.jokingisfun..com a joke and humour blog, also with brain teasers and riddles.

Try ur name in Japanese, it's fun , A=Ka, B=tu C=mi, D=te, E=ku, F=lu, G=ji, H=ri, I=ki, J=zu, K=me, L=ta, M=rin, N=to, O=mo, P=no, Q=ke, R=shi, S=ari, T=chi, U=do, V=ru, W=mei, X=na, Y=fu, Z=zi. ,
AYODELE is Kafumotekutaku

Try your full name and have fun.

There is a couple who had been happily married for years. Their only problem was the husband's habit of farting (messing) loudly every morning when he wakes up. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and would make her gasp for air. Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her that he couldn't stop and that it was perfectly natural. She was concerned that one day he would blow his intestines out. Years went by and he continued with his farting habit. Then one thanksgiving morning, the wife was preparing turkey for the family and the husband was sound asleep. She looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey intestine, gizzard, lives and the other inner parts. Suddenly, a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was still sleeping. Gently pulling back the elastic waistband of his underpants she emptied the bowl of turkey guts (intestine) into his shorts and went back downstairs. After sometime, she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting sound which was followed by a loud scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control herself and was laughing seriously with tears in her eyes! She was happy that after many years of torture, she had got him back pretty good. About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She asked him what the matter was and the husband replied, "Honey, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I didn't listen to you. "What do you mean?", asked the wife. "Well, you always told me that I would end up farting my intestines out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace of God I got most of them back in."

A very drunk man comes out of
the bar and sees another very
drunk man. He looked up into
the sky and said, "Is this the sun
or the moon?"
The other drunk man answered,
"I don't know. I'm a stranger
here myself."

A woman is having s£x with her lov£r in an apartment 20 stories high, Suddenly her husband returns from a long trip, and she hears him approaching in the apartment. So she tells the lov £r: "Do not move at all, I will resolve this situation!" In comes the husband: "who is this?" asked the husband Wife: "Oh sweetie, this is just a robot I bought to have s£x with when you're not around, so that I don't have to cheat with your friends or with the neighbours, I did it because you spend all the time traveling and u know that I, uh hm, have needs!!" Husband: "Oh honey I understand perfectly well, I believe you, ok let's do a quickie now, I came home as fast as I can and I'm extremely Hot now!!" Wife:"OH NO DARLING, yesterday I got my p £riod, u better take a bath, I'll prepare u something to eat, " (The lov£r is left with the husband in the room alone, while the wife walked out, ) Husband: DAmn I'm so fu*king Hot, I am going to f*ck this robot instead (He tries entering the robot from behind, ) With a metallic and robotic voice the lov£r proclaims: "SYSTEM ERROR! WRONG HOLE!!, SYSTEM ERROR! WRONG HOLE!" The husband says: "f*ck this crappy robot, I'm going to throw it out of the god damn window!!!!" The lov£r realizes that he is 20 stories high in the apartment and exclaims: "SOFTWARE UPDATE!!!!! SOFTWARE UPDATE!!!!! YOU MAY TRY AGAIN, I REPEAT, TRY AGAIN!!!!

A woman is having s£x with her lov£r in an apartment 20 stories high, Suddenly her husband returns from a long trip, and she hears him approaching in the apartment. So she tells the lov £r: "Do not move at all, I will resolve this situation!" In comes the husband: "who is this?" asked the husband Wife: "Oh sweetie, this is just a robot I bought to have s£x with when you're not around, so that I don't have to cheat with your friends or with the neighbours, I did it because you spend all the time traveling and u know that I, uh hm, have needs!!" Husband: "Oh honey I understand perfectly well, I believe you, ok let's do a quickie now, I came home as fast as I can and I'm extremely Hot now!!" Wife:"OH NO DARLING, yesterday I got my p £riod, u better take a bath, I'll prepare u something to eat, " (The lov£r is left with the husband in the room alone, while the wife walked out, ) Husband: DAmn I'm so fu*king Hot, I am going to f*ck this robot instead (He tries entering the robot from behind, ) With a metallic and robotic voice the lov£r proclaims: "SYSTEM ERROR! WRONG HOLE!!, SYSTEM ERROR! WRONG HOLE!" The husband says: "f*ck this crappy robot, I'm going to throw it out of the god damn window!!!!" The lov£r realizes that he is 20 stories high in the apartment and exclaims: "SOFTWARE UPDATE!!!!! SOFTWARE UPDATE!!!!! YOU MAY TRY AGAIN, I REPEAT, TRY AGAIN!!!!

@all, thanks

Right, but not totally right.

Hmmm! You're right, but is the messing a sin on the man?

The boy don expose him mama,

WHO TELL U SAY HAUSE (ABOKI) NO GOOD? Aboki people no dey lie ooo, yesterday four aboki men go rob one bank for our street. As dem enter, the aboki wey carry gun come shout; Ebri body lie ground, if i look me walahi me i go shoot. Na im one man open him eye small look am. The aboki shout 4ram say; Oga, i no dey hear kwo? Walahi talahi if i look me again, Na hell i go see myself, So small time, the man come look am again, The aboki come say; Kai, if to say this ma gun no be toy, me i for don shoot you since.

There was a man who likes eating bean cakes but any time he eats one he always fart, so his wife advised him to stopped eating it. One day as, he was coming from work he smelt sweet bean cakes and was tempted to buy six of it, he ate it all before he got home because his wife must not know he still eats bean baker. When he got home, before he entered his house his wife said she has a surprise for him and so, took a cloth and tied it around his eyes to blind fold him. She then walked him to the dinning table and sat him down. The Phone in the room rang and the wife went to answer it, just then,he felt like farting, he wanted to hold it in but hearing his wife on the phone in the room, he raised one side of his buttocks and released it, after about 5 seconds he felt like farting again so he raised the other side of his buttocks and let it out. The whole dining was smelling but soon stopped smelling before his wife came back. His wife removed the blind fold and to his surprise, sitting around his dinning table were his family ,boss ,co- workers, staff and his friends waiting to surprise him because it was his birthday.[color=#000099][/color]

Always watch out for fantastic jokes from me. Let's go there!!!

A boy caught his dad red handed with their maid making l0v£ and his dad gave him 500 naira (nigerian currency) not to tell his mum. Almost refusing the money, the boy said: dad, that's not fair, mum gave me 1000 naira when I caught her with our gate man.
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