viczing:
Dear Bunmi,
My sexy sister-in-law made it obvious she funcied me as soon as we were alone. I hadn’t met my wife’s older sister until recently as she lives and works abroad. She came back a few weeks ago for another sister’s wedding and she’s been staying with us on and off ever since. She’s a splitting image of my wife except that she is out-going and lively. My wife is quite shy and quiet I work in a teaching hospital and my shift means I’m at home for part of the day while my wife is at work, so I was left to entertain her.
She’s flirting and funny and we got on well. Then I started to suspect she was after me. Whenever she looked at me, I saw desire in her eyes. She was always touching me whenever we talked and though this was done casually, I knew what she was thinking as she turned me on too. One day, I took her to the shops and on our way home; she grabbed hold of me and kissed me. She said she just felt like it and the kissing felt good. When we got home, the kissing continued then she suggested I come to her room. She said as we both wanted sex, we should go for it as she’d soon be going back. What hot-blooded man would refuse this? So we had sex, and it was mind-blowing.
The sex must have gone into her head as she increased her flirting even in front of my wife. I felt guilty deceiving my wife with her sister but that didn’t stop us having sex a couple more times. Now I am worried my wife could find out. My sister-in-law has since gone back but she phones from time to time and is always asking my wife to pass the phone on to me. I wish I’d resisted sleeping with her.
Please what should I do now?

. Confess 2 God and your wife. Its better if you tell her yourself n if she genuinely loves you, she'll forgive you even if it'll take time.

izaray:
Dat's their problem, dey fail to understand when sumtin is serious, and when its just a joke!

. Yea cos they are either not matured minded or have a very low sense of reasoning.

Freest:
Who says girls are just after your money? Ladies also deeply fall in love and they express it through some attributes. The level of love differ, but when she deeply loves you, she attributes some of this traits
1) She's not interested in exorbitant spending but helps you save/plan.
While some ladies find every means to eat and waste ur hard earned money, she helps u plan and even stops you from willingly spending unnecessarily on her. She cuts down her expenses just so u put the money somewhere profiting.
2) She wants to spend time with you always.
She Wants to share her experiences and activities with you cos she takes you as a part of her life. She needs you to know every details of her day
3) She buys you gifts she knows you need.
She wants to prove her love for you by getting you gifts. She hears you complain or whine over something you need and she secretly makes efforts to get them for you.
4) She buys your mum and siblings gifts, she wants to always talk to her and assist her
She likes sending gifts to your mum. Guys tend to be closer to their mum and she likes to prove her love for you by loving your mum, spends time with her and assist her. Some package gifts and send down to her no matter where she is (Like my gurl)
5) She shows you off to her family and defends you
She shows you off to her family, wants them to meet you and get to know you. She defends you in your absense when they speak of you. She protects you from spending anyhow to please them. She doesn't want them using you as a money bag even if you can affors it.
6) She talks about the future and marriage plans with you and how she can help

She talks abt her future and puts you in it. She wants to know how she can help, she wants to know how she fits in, she wants to know what the future holds and how you both can make it work out.

Pls feel free to add yours
When you notice this things, please dont take her for granted, just love her in return.
This are my opinions gotten from experience... Shouts out to my baby!!!

Them say na Tosyn2much be oga here, so as other people dey do make i do my own too

Cc:Tosyn2much

. On point.

Ladies dis is new year (2015) if u want 2 stop d delay 2 your getting married dis year, dis r 2 rules out of d do's n don't 2 follow. 1. Pls leave other women's husbands so that u can get your own husband quickly. 2. You meet a guy today n tomorrow he starts extravagant spendings, and showering you with so many gifts n outings unnecessarily, hmmm ladies run for you life o cos being with him might be delaying you and as soon as he gets what he wants mehn girl you are on your own. Your chapter becomes closed in his life.

trollolo:
Uh why not try to get a job, because it's obvious you're Jobless. If you weren't you wouldn't be "Crying since morning" over someone... (Some of this topics gan makes me scratch my head on how old some of you are. Ridiculousness) Also Op, have you also heard about something called a phone? It's very useful to communicate with someone who is far away from you.

. I wonder if some people know what luv is all about mostly when it has 2 do with ur fiance being ur best friend. I do not expect you 2 understand n 4 d records I've been working since I finished my NYSC n didn't go 2 work 2day cos I took off 2 see him off cos I resume work 8am. I don't blame you. You will understand wen u fall in luv.

Enegod:
kids falling inlove...ain't you suppose to be reading your boooks

. I do not how u handle issues but I made it clear *matured minds only* and secondly I'm more than that name u called me. Thirdly I've got no books 2 read only if u have novels 2 giv me.

We've neva bin apart 4 more than a month for 4 gud yrs nt until july 2014 wen he got transfered. Dey went on a 3months training b4 coming bk. Nw we meet 1s in a while at most 2 - 3 months. On d 23rd of last year he gave me a surprise visit n left dis morning. I feel so sad, lonely n empty I've bin crying since morning. Pls I'm here 4 advise on hw 2 b normal cos his absence is fastly killing me. Pls matured n sincere advise Is all I need now.

Ilekokonit:


True talk and the problem gets compounded when the initial love that birthed the marriage begins to fade away especially if you got married for the wrong reason(s) e.g due to societal pressure or if you didn't marry your soul mate in the first place.

If your wife or husband is not your soul mate, it WILL get to a stage that mutual hatred will replace the original love which was not really rooted in the first place because you rushed things without thrashing out compatibility issues or maybe one party played the other "419" love just to step up and get some benefits from the marriage without the hapless partner realising this.

A lot of men rush to get married to ensure they get "on demand" sex whilst a lot of women rush to get married because of societal pressure or because they got pregnant whilst courting. These reasons are NOT cogent enough to warrant getting married but a lot of people make the same mistakes over and over again as has been happening for donkey years.

I believe that HONEST, OPEN and healthy arguments during courtship will reduce the divorce rate in society because such arguments will bring out the other persons real character, likes and dislikes and each party will then be able to make an informed decision as to whether they want to spend the rest of their lives with a partner whose basic character they now to an extent understand as revealed from their healthy unsupressed arguments. But will today’s deceptive, pretentious character traits in people allow them to show the other party their real character in a healthy argument?? There is just too much deceit, scamming and outright PRE-MEDITATED DECEIT in today’s relationships that even dating is like putting a gun to your head because 9 times out of 10, you will be deceived / scammed by 21st Century partners.

Some people even resort to NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) mind games to try to control their partners ?

Regarding 2 people sleeping on the same bed for 352 days a year, its true that todays people need their space and the advent of smart phones and internet on the go, a lot of nonsensical TV programmes and irrelevant time wasting internet sites have all conspired to make us so individualistic and selfish that we NO LONGER genuinely love ourselves in the true sense of it and on top of this, the stress in making a living in a Global Recession that remains relentless 7 years on means that everyone just wants to be left alone after a hard days slug and sleeping on the same bed with someone who has probably began to irritate you or eat into your chill out time further stresses 21st century marriages.

I believe that the glue / cement that held our parents marriages together is no longer sold in ANY market. Marriage is becoming more of a trap nowadays.

On another tangent, I marvel when I read threads like "will you date a broke man” And I wonder why some people have eyes but cannot see and have ears and cannot hear. Or is it a function of immaturity ? Like I mentioned above, this 7 year Global Recession is unrelenting and at its inception in 2008 it was adjudged to be worse than the Great Depression of the 1930's (in my opinion the current one is not even a recession but a Depression which is a worse situation compounded with negative equity and a credit crunch). If the likes of Woolworths and Lehman Brothers that have been around for more than 100 years can go under because their creditors pulled the plug. If Ireland and a few other countries can humbly accept economic bailouts to survive. If China is now a major lender to America then you will see that the WHOLE world is living in an UNCERTAIN and UNCHARTED FINANCIAL ERA with nobody being able to guarantee their financial future.

Now with millions of men and women losing their jobs globally (2.5 million unemployed in the UK alone), why would some people still use money or the lack of it as a factor in making the most important decision in their lives - the choice of a life partner

That's why I believe that someone can be highly literate but still be a current affairs / financial illiterate. To compound this Achilles heel (which to me is a major character defect) is the fact that Black people especially Africans (Nigerians categorically) worship money hence everything including their relationships are "greedily" scrutinized through the grubby prism of money hence their marriages don't stand the test of time.

But they make the same mistake OVER and OVER again forgetting that money comes and goes and NOBODY can lock money inside a room because "riches certainly make themselves wings; they fly away as an eagle toward heaven. Proverbs 23:5"

Money is needed in todays world but if one overtly or covertly bases matters of the heart principally on money then that relationship WILL fail as its foundation was faulty to start with. He who has ears, let him hear.

. He who have eye let him c dis nw o. Food 4 d wise.

delishpot:
Nope. Wife is wife, sister is sister. Besides, what kind of marriage is that when husband and wife start seeing themselves as brother and sister? That marriage must be borring mana! No dirty talks? no flashing? No ass spanking? No nada? Shuo, I guess that marriage was never romantic from the start. So lets not blame time here.
On the other hand, the man may be looking for excuse to start cheating.

. Dia's def no luv btwn u 2 cos if dia is, exactly wot he has listed above wld b d oda of d day n it'll spice tins up in dat marriage n mk it fun.

;DDats d only way I can sleep if nt I'll b awake all night. Dia was a time he traveled out 4 5 months omo it was hell I'll gather all d pillows bt u knw na dey've gat no arms 2 rap me with. So I watched movies all night only 2 sleep early hrs of d morning it wasn't funny. Its so swt wen u lay by his side wif ur head on his chest, 1 leg inbtwn his 2 legs n den wif his arm rapped all ova u mehn its so sweet u'll 4get u r on earth. 4 those in luv u'll understand me better. ;DDats d only way I can sleep if nt I'll b awake all night. Dia was a time he traveled out 4 5 months omo it was hell I'll gather all d pillows bt u knw na dey've gat no arms 2 rap me with. So I watched movies all night only 2 sleep early hrs of d morning it wasn't funny. Its so swt wen u lay by his side wif ur head on his chest, 1 leg inbtwn his 2 legs n den wif his arm rapped all ova u mehn its so sweet u'll 4get u r on earth. 4 those in luv u'll understand me better.

Men wld support dis thread bt dis group of men called *baby man* wld nt bt rather play wif it as usual.

Dey won't liv close 2 ha age n dia death wld b more painful.

Beautiful women wif wonderful kids.

Politics nothing we won't c.

U've got d power 2 mk ha 4get everything. Play ur card well.

Even if u catch ur man in ur matrimonial wif a woman, it givs u no right wot so eva 2 cheat as long as u r married 2 him.

Pls don't force urself 2 luv him. Since he'll b bk in march ask 4 lil more time so u can get 2 knw him better bt if tins don't work out, pls have a rethink abt d marriage issue

Cute