₦airaland Forum

WhistleB:
Ok. What you should do is to pray it never happens again. Because you may slap a man who is quarter to die and you will end up explaining to the police how it all happened.

Really?

I pray it doesn't happen again, all right but, what he did is way worse than a slap from a lady.

Ehinmola:
Lucky U. Next time walk away and pretend as if u don't notice him. Otherwise you will regret it

All right. Thank you

WhistleB:
If I tell you will go back and give him a dirty slap? No! Next topic please.

No, but I'd know better next time.

Next!

10pm.

A man slapped me. No, not my face, my "bumbum". I didn't see who it was before I turned to scream at him, probably return the slap.

But, when I turned, I saw that he was really high (drunk) and I was guessing he'd do higher things if I "try" myself. He smiled at me and then winked. Formed a "o" with his hand and placed his index finger in it. He kept sliding his finger in and out, in and out.

"Baby, mo like e gan. Gdnjsubdgjzkmabsg iyawo mi" he said in a whisper.

Oghene biko o!!! Where's this thunder when you need it? Ehn.

I shuddered, swallowed my words, held my tiny hand in mid-air and changed my angry facial expression to a surprised one, not because I was scared, I only realized i'd given my life to Christ, and walking away was a peaceful option.

Davash222:
No, I wanna buy from the author.

I'm the author

celestialdamsel:
hmm.. Nice 1

Thank you

Davash222:
Nice story line... What's the name of the author

You wanna buy my book?

9pm

A man slapped me. No, not my face, my "bumbum". I didn't see who it was before I turned to scream at him, probably return the slap.

But, when I turned, I saw that he was really high (drunk) and I was guessing he'd do higher things if I "try" myself. He smiled at me and then winked. Formed a "o" with his hand and placed his index finger in it. He kept sliding his finger in and out, in and out.

"Baby, mo like e gan. Gdnjsubdgjzkmabsg iyawo mi" he said in a whisper.

Oghene biko o!!! Where's this thunder when you need it? Ehn.

I shuddered, swallowed my words, held my tiny hand in mid-air and changed my angry facial expression to a surprised one, not because I was scared, I only realized i'd given my life to Christ, and walking away was a peaceful option.

[/color]

Mcjoyce:
Oh my God.....I can't stop laughing

[color=#000099]

Halfpenny:


Nicely written btw

Thank you

Millypink:
Hahahaha Romantism

Be nice!

Nogodye:
Lmao ...mehn too bad but atleast i learnt my lesson

We both did

Nogodye:
Eyah...i can understand how you feel at the end of the whole senario...have similar experience too, I remember speaking phonetic trying
to twist my tongue for one girl for
my area, the girl was like "i no
understand wetin you dey talk o,me no sabi englisi" i was embarrassed ehn. She even think i was asking for a road direction .I started cursing those that
originates the saying that says "The
way you dress is the way you will be address" coz i tried to addressed the girl the way she dressed but mehn na die o :Dmuch embarrasement that day .

Sorry o! Your own worse

jjbest123:
Eyah, So Sorry About That... Am Just Doing Fine, Wish You A Fruitful And Splendid Day.

Thank you.

Have a great day!

9:43 am.

I was in one of those Lagos big buses, not molue o. There was this fine guy by my side, I kept stealing glances. I couldn't help it. He smelled like a clean Cologne, a nice, clean ocean wave.

He's focused on his phone. Didn't even notice me. Don't look at me like that, carry your face and comot. This one that I wanted to look at me was busy chatting with someone on his phone, a girl, I thought.. Mtchew.

A friend warned me to have a less dramatic day, and I planned to do just that." I'll start conversation with fine boy to get his attention, it's not only guys that know how to start conversations" I planned.

"Just five minutes talk" I agreed with my other self and turned to smile at him.

"I love your Cologne, what's the make?" I asked , revealing cream dentition, and immediately thanked God for my dentition when he revealed his, smiling back at me with curious eyes. Brown, scattered teeth visited my eyes. I shut them to hold back shock.

Fine boy did not answer but stood up to introduce himself to people in the bus.

"My name is chukwudi, let me introduce my product to you. I have fine perfumes from Germany, Italy...." He continued with heavy Igbo accent, all the while looking at me through the corners of his eyes. Just then I realized the Cologne i'd perceived was from his bag, not him.

Lost in thought, accusing my other self why she decided to be annoying this morning, I felt a tap on my shoulder. Fine boy was done introducing his products and was asking me which of the perfume I'd like to buy.

I ignored fine boy and asked conductor for my change and continued typing on my phone, determined to obey my friend's warning.

Perfume ko.

It is still paining me. [color=#770077][/color]

jjbest123:
Not Much Sha, How Are You This Morning?

Still feeling bad.

How are you?

jjbest123:
You Want To Talk To Fine Boy With Nice Smell Abi?

Abi? Too much to ask?

9:43 am.

I was in one of those Lagos big buses, not molue o. There was this fine guy by my side, I kept stealing glances. I couldn't help it. He smelled like a clean Cologne, a nice, clean ocean wave.

He's focused on his phone. Didn't even notice me. Don't look at me like that, carry your face and comot. This one that I wanted to look at me was busy chatting with someone on his phone, a girl, I thought.. Mtchew.

A friend warned me to have a less dramatic day, and I planned to do just that." I'll start conversation with fine boy to get his attention, it's not only guys that know how to start conversations" I planned.

"Just five minutes talk" I agreed with my other self and turned to smile at him.

"I love your Cologne, what's the make?" I asked , revealing cream dentition, and immediately thanked God for my dentition when he revealed his, smiling back at me with curious eyes. Brown, scattered teeth visited my eyes. I shut them to hold back shock.

Fine boy did not answer but stood up to introduce himself to people in the bus.

"My name is chukwudi, let me introduce my product to you. I have fine perfumes from Germany, Italy...." He continued with heavy Igbo accent, all the while looking at me through the corners of his eyes. Just then I realized the Cologne i'd perceived was from his bag, not him.

Lost in thought, accusing my other self why she decided to be annoying this morning, I felt a tap on my shoulder. Fine boy was done introducing his products and was asking me which of the perfume I'd like to buy.

I ignored fine boy and asked conductor for my change and continued typing on my phone, determined to obey my friend's warning.

Perfume ko.

Good morning! [color=#000099][/color]

Silkmoth:
I had sex with shaggy, burberry hats and blings were later reported missing, I guess that makes me Chavy

Who's this guy?

Silkmoth:
This is the reason pinky can't rule the world!
@pinkyruledworld


I fell in love with a beautiful tuts but I guess the joke's on me now cos she is a generous flooz

Warrisdis na?

pinkyruledworld:
im in love with aKON, now am A KONvict

Nice one

plzkillme:
Ikr

Really?

SuperSuave:
medicine after death

Glad you're still alive. Take one pill per day till the next Bbn :

If you are NOT an ardent fan of the reality TV series, Big Brother Naija, I bring you good news! I have brought a list of things that you will use to #pepperdem! We all know how those who watch Big Brother disturb our timelines with gist, pictures and what went down in the house. Worry no more! After reading article, I am 100% sure that you will use these points to convince them that Big Brother Naija is not good for them. Here we go:

1. Big Brother Naija gives people high blood pressure


For those of you carrying T-boss’s matter on their head like Jumoke’s bread of destiny, you better receive sense before you have high blood pressure on entertainment that will end next week. You see all this “Bisola said this” or “Efe did this” “T.Boss is fake” will not help anybody. You better watch it with involving your heart rate. Na drama you dey watch so! Let me repeat it again, it will give you high blood pressure, o! For some of us who don’t watch the daily show, our blood pressure is safe. All we do is waste MB watching it prayerfully on YouTube. No vexing, no annoyance, no wahala.



2. Big Brother Naija consumes people’s time


You see all that time you spend glued to your T.V with your eyeballs following Marvis’s every dry move, shey you know you can use that time to create one ogbonge invention? Like build a space craft or something? You can also use that time to release a hit track like your senator, Dino Melaye.

3. Big Brother Naija is a Jezebel sent to attack your spiritual life


Common guys, instead of depriving yourself of sleep just to catch Bally and Bisola making out in the dark, use that time to pray or bring down all the enemies that have refused to die since you started casting and binding. Look at this lukewarm Christian o, don’t you know that vigil is better than shower scene? These BBN watchers are not mature Christians, sef!

4. Big Brother Naija is a cankerworm sent to finish your money


Before you say “Is it your money”, let me answer the question myself “No, it is not my money...seen on Syncityng.com

khalhokage:
I fell in love with a tailor now my life is hanging by a thread.

That's new!

I fell in love with a banker now I'm aLOAN

I fell in love with a chef now I'm in soup

Drop yours

Syncityng.com

If you are living on your own, Nigerian mothers want you to move back to the house because:
A. They love you.
B. They need someone to clean the house.
C. They need someone to cook.
D. They need someone to wash plates.
E. They need someone to send on errands.
F. They need someone to annoy.
G. They need someone to remind of marriage.
H. They need someone to complain to.
I. They need someone to gist with.
J. They need someone to remind that Okafor’s daughter is now working in Shell.


K. They need someone to completely take over the house chores.
L. They need someone to see everyday/keep close.
M. They need someone to carry to deliverance.
N. They need someone to fire prayer on.
O.They need someone to remind that Okonkwo’s son is now abroad.
P: They don’t want you to suffer.
Q. They need a run down on your movements.
R. They want to know if you have joined bad gang.
S: They want to know how many times you press phone...read on Syncityng.com (under chief synner)

Exam score :1000 marks.
If the answer is not above, add yours…

Judasjudas:
nigga better go invest dt money elsewhere.. music not ur calling at all..

Judas, is this another betrayal?