₦airaland Forum

What is the purpose of marriage if not for companionship and complimenting each other's weaknesses.

A husband who loses his job is like a new wife with the challenge of stillbirth all the time. She's depressed already with her situation. She needs all the support she can get from her husband at that point in time. Because a time of distress like this one, shows you who a true companion is. But instead, the husband started cheating and threatened her with a 2nd wife.

No matter what, trials will come in marriage but how we manage it is what determines whether or not the marriage will last.


Appreciate your time and suggestions. Thanks

mutter:
Please try and communicate with your wife.
There are always three stories as they say...yours, hers and the truth.
Marriage takes somentolerance and sacrifice.
Your wife has been supportive but she has to work
on her behaviour.
Don't feel entitled...like she owes you everything.
She probably acted out of insecurity.
We wome often get adviced against providing for a man because often men abandon women when they feel they have made it in life.

I have lost count of sitting her down to explain things to her. There was a time she reported me to a third party. When both husband and wife heard from both of us, they were disappointed at the way she treated her husband and still playing the victim all the name of "I'm the one supporting him". That's not the only time she would get such response from third parties. And those ones would even share their own family challenges too. So she stopped reporting me to third parties.

Blissquare:
Before I read comments, let me make my own. How were you able to build a duplex with running water despite failed businesses? Was it built before you married her? Have you been caught cheating? Has your family also been asking her for money? How can she be paying bills all this while and be building a property that you don't know about with just 120k monthly? I believe that this story is incomplete.

How I provide a house is never an issue. Cheating or family asking her for money has never happened and will never. In fact, my siblings only visited once ( left same day) since we got married. Mum came when she gave birth but since then, she has only visited twice and left same day. I guess mum is not comfortable with my situation.

All this explanation is to let you know that my extended family is never the issue. Talking about paying bills, her major and monthly contribution to the family is food for the three of us. And am not the choosy type who complains about food. I eat whatever is available in the house and so our little kid.

Crackhaus:

I would have suggested you talk to her, but a woman who is already being rude and insulting with a touch of arrogance, is not the type of woman you want to have a healthy conversation with – she will either flare up or use her God-given skills in manipulation to turn the entire conversation around by making herself the victim, until you start asking yourself how the conversation began in the first place.

As if you live with us.

Married my wife three years ago. Lost my job after marriage and have tried different kind of business but failed except this current one I just established. To the glory of God, in spite of the failures, I was able to provide a decent and very comfortable duplex powered by 24hours solar electricity with running water since we got married. My wife has being supportive. She supported my first business with 500k. She also make sure there is food in the house and the care of our only child (1.7yrs old). And God has been blessing her. Although she earns 120k monthly.

Unfortunately, my wife has become rude and arrogant. Throws insult at me and my extended family at any given misunderstanding between us. I can't even give any instruction or try to correct her, I will get the insult of my life. I have lost all manner of respect from her as a result of her support to the family which I understand as a struggling husband.

But the most painful part is, I saw a land documents and receipt bearing her name (maiden name) without my knowledge. She asked one of her siblings to be in charge of the building project so I won't know. Although, I didn't ask her anything or give any attitude. But I have left the home for some days now to clear my head. I only told her am traveling for a business trip.

Please, what would you have done if you were in my shoes. I welcome your constructive criticism and advice.