₦airaland Forum

Hello Everybody,
I'd like to thank you all for your support, all the advice, reprimands and rebuke. My only interest was saving my marriage which I felt was on the cusp of collapse. Things are being fixed as I write. It's been a case of misconstrued intentions and ultimately my wife is not an evil person. We burt each other by things that we didn't understand especially on my part. I love my wife dearly and it's never been about money. True, my wife currently earns more than I do and shoulders the bulk of the responsibility. I guess the pressure got to us both especially me for being unable to meet my financial obligations.
The story I posted was not real, but a representation of what I felt was going on to protect our identities. Truthwillout is my wife. Once again I thank you all. Right now we're trying to heal and fix the cracks that led to this unfortunate scenario.
Thank you all.

NB: She didn't turn the children against me. She didn't buy land anywhere and she has never referred to me as irresponsible.

Wow! Looks like I have missed some action here. It takes a man to admit he is wrong, more so that he misrepresented facts and I commend the OP. Hope you guys work it out.

Cc - kennedyiheme
Otipoju
Richie240
Martinez39
BRATISLAVA

I am almost completely sure you are not giving us the full picture. It would be really interesting to hear your wife's version of this story. As human beings, we tend to tell stories in a way that favors us and make us garner pity. If your wife is the breadwinner at the moment, she deserves your loyalty, respect and understanding. Taking care of the financial responsibilities of a home is not easy. You plan, you worry, you get afraid, you have sleepless nights...especially if your spouse does not pitch in.
Here's what happens. When a man loses his source of livelihood, every little move by a woman suddenly becomes emaaculating. The woman is already under a terrible strain and you are here to barmouth her to strangers.

I frankly do not believe you are doing enough. Factories abound, uber is there, the keke business is there, even uneducated teenagers from the north are hustling and making a good living riding bikes.

Yea, sometimes a man experiences setbacks, my dad did. The true measure of manhood lies in dusting yourself off the ground and trying again. These days sadly, there are too many lazy men who whine instead of actually being men. If you are here bad mouthing your wife, then I'm willing to bet, you do it everywhere. My cousin went through this. Everybody called her wicked. The husband's elder brother was like come and stay with me and I'll fix you up with something. They no tell the brother. Las Las he chases the man out of his home and told everyone to ignore the man because he is lazy. All he does is play video games and sleep.

Society is particularly unfair to women. A quick look through this site will convince any unbiased person of that. You already have men pitying you and condemning your wife which is exactly what you wanted. Oga poster, you came here seeking pity, looking for people to condemn your wife and soothe your ego and you already have faceless strangers doing that, but the truth is you are failing as a husband and a father. These people cheering you on and telling you your wife is wicked are in their ow homes hustling and taking care of their business.

I am a man like you and I will not lie to you. You are your own problem. Take these steps.

1. First of all, love and appreciate your wife. Thank her for all she does.

2. Pray hard and ask God to show you why you are experiencing hard luck. Folks here might not tell you the truth, but you may have a character flaw that is working against you. You may actually be lazy, most lazy people won't admit it. It may also be karma. You may have treated others, including your wife badly in the past hence the problems. Yes, it happens. Find out what the problem is and fix it.

3. Hustle, hustle, hustle! I don't believe in excuses. Real men don't. Meanwhile, what do you do? You can mail me your cv at dehindep@gmail.com.