₦airaland Forum

osmosis101:
Oga dey form hardguy but na simp inside... Tell him to gve u space,he will later com begging

That's as good as kissing the relationship goodbye, I tried it once and he moved on like I didn't exist. I still had to call him to sort things out. I am a beautiful lady and guys are flocking around me but it doesn't faze him, if I try to make him jealous he would tell me to move on to the next guy if I feel he is not good enough for me.

Nairaland Has Finally Ruined My Relationship

I've been dating a staunch Nairalander for two years, and he also introduced me to the site. While I visit once in a while, he can't go a day without scrolling through the site and at times he draws my attention to some interesting topics and we would go through the comments together. I told him that I don't like the site due to the constant bashing of women that goes on here. To my uttermost dismay he has been so influenced by the red pill movement and it has left our relationship in tatters.

I can't remember the last time I felt pampered or got treated like a woman because he doesn't want to look like a simp. There is no love in the relationship anymore because he is always too hard on me and treats me like a man. My guy hardly ever apologizes to me, if he annoys me and I try to give him the cold shoulder he ignores me completely and moves about his business like I don't even exist. He calls my two exs simps because I gisted him about how they adored me and was always scared of losing me. It hurts me that the guy I am dating doesn't value me and is ready to move on immediately as I walk out the door.

He convinced me to come stay over at his place for a while because he wanted to train me for a remote job that he got for me which I am supposed to start next month. I objected because I know how he treats me each time that I am around but he insisted so I caved in. It's been one problem to the other since I came over. He faults every single thing that I do, I wore a cloth that a guy gifted me on our anniversary and I got the scolding of my life. I got moody and told him to avoid me when he tried talking to me later that day, he simply said okay and disappeared from the house till late in the night.

He sees everything as an insult to his person, he said it's disrespectful to pick calls from guys in his presence, he would still accuse me of cheating if I go outside to pick those calls. Just two days back I was angry at him because of something he did that I didn't like so I flung his hands away when he tried to touch my cheeks and play with me, Oga stood up and started ignoring me. I was just expecting him to apologize and pamper me but he just locked up and left the house to God knows where. When he returned, I dressed up to go out with a friend and he told me not to return to his house if I leave. He treats me like a piece of furniture and won't still let me go out with people that are ready to give me attention.

This issue is making me lose my feelings for him and he doesn't even care. We hardly have sex because his touch irritates me due to his attitude towards me. If I turn down his advance once he doesn't bother to try again for days. In my previous relationships the guys always comes crawling and begging at night to have sex but this one doesn't even send, he can lock up for two weeks which makes me wonder if he is gay sometimes. He came back home very late on Friday night because he was avoiding me, I hid the food in the house because I was angry at him and he went to bed hungry. He woke up late at night to boil potatoes and woke me up in the process, I told him where I kept the food and he told me to eat it alone.

He left home by 7am yesterday for his football training only to come back by 10pm leaving me all alone in the house. I had to go out with a friend only to come back and didn't still meet him at home. He came back, took his bath and left the house again. He came back one hour later and slept on the floor. I woke him up to eat because I cooked with the money he left at home and he rejected the food citing the previous incident of me hiding food from him so I should continue cooking and eating alone. I told him that the food would waste because I already enjoyed where I went to. He just said I was disturbing him and should have gone home with the guy instead. He keeps making me feel like I am not wanted, he would tell me that he has the right to do whatever he wants because it his house but I must abide by his rules because I am a woman. He can go out and come back anytime he likes but I can't do the same, if I try it he would ask me to leave as if I am an IDP. All my complaints about how bad he was treating me fell on deaf ears, he just ignored me and slept off. He woke up this morning and is keeping to himself.

Please is this what the red pill is all about? I keep craving attention and love from my man and it's not forthcoming, I would have broken up but I really need the job he promised me while I wait for service. Is there something that I can do to salvage this relationship?
Please I am sorry for the epistle and errors, I just needed to pour out my heart somewhere.

Some time ago my boyfriend brought my matter here because I went to visit a male friend and I was called all sorts of derogatory names without anyone hearing my side of the story.

We met early last year, he was just out of school without a job but I still accepted him regardless. I had a stubborn ex that wouldn't go away so he was taking care of my bills while I was dating my new boyfriend which he was well aware of. I later had an issue with the ex that led to him calling the police on me accusing me of stealing the iPhone 7 that he bought for me while insisting that I return it or he would take the matter to his village and make sure I run mad. I stood my ground amid all the threats held on to the phone.

Coincidentally, things picked up for my guy when the ex left, he started getting lots of freelance gigs online so I didn't feel the absence of the old guy. My boyfriend made sure I didn't lack anything even without me asking. I had to break up with him once because I felt he was doing too much and I might be running him down. He laughed it off and gave me screenshots of some of his account balance.

Fast forward to this year and things went south again, The gigs stopped coming in, and some of the firms he worked for closed shop so he was surviving on his savings which were depleting very quickly. It's worthy to note that before now the major issue that I have had with him is the way he sees my relationships with other men. He practically doesn't want me to have male friends or even go on harmless sitouts with friends. He thinks it's a disrespect to him for me to have anything to do with other guys while I am in his place.

This has resulted in serious fights each I come back from seeing a friend, At times he gets so mad that he flings my things outside to go stay with whoever I went to see.

Meanwhile, things have been very tough for him recently to the extent that feeding has become difficult. He quickly invested in a farm with with a friend when his savings were going down and used the remaining money to startup a blog. Now it's looking as if the guy he's doing the farm business with has scammed him because it's been from one story to the other and he's so broke right now that he can't even afford data to write content for his blog which we all know blogging is even saturated and takes time to start paying.

I started work two weeks ago and I have been the one taking care of my transport fare, he only gives me 1k once in a while to support. It's this same men he doesn't want me to communicate with that has been helping me out all this while. He sits at home all day waiting for the proceeds of the farm so he can start mini importation of wigs.

Every guy that asks me out seems to be well to do than my guy and it really bothers me. They all have nice cares and ready to spend while my own guy now depends on begging to feed. Even though he's smart and all but I don't know where the break through will come from and it seems I am wasting my time with him.

On Monday was my off day and I was at home, I woke up with a mood swing so I wasn't talking to him. He was busy cleaning the house without mentioning breakfast so I had to call someone to come get breakfast for me. He got mad at me tagging it an insult to him. It caused issues and I left the house and dared him to do his worst and he asked me not to leave because I needed some positive vibes since he was boring me with his attitude. I actually went to my family house but he feels I always go to see a guy each time I leave the house.

I came back around 8pm to meet the house locked and he kept ignoring my calls knowing fully well that I didn't leave with my key and I wasn't feeling fine and needed to take my drugs. I got drenched by the rain and my sickness go worst. He came back home by 11pm that night.

Now I haven't been able to go to work for the past three days and he's been running around buying drugs and food on credit so I can get well when he caused it. On the other hand a guy that has been giving me stuffs asked me to take a break from work and rest and he will give me my full salary.

I am just confused, it seems I am leaving better things out there for a broke guy and it's bothering me. What do you guys think I should do

Please ignore any typos, I wrote in a hurry

Some time ago my boyfriend brought my matter here because I went to visit a male friend and I was called all sorts of derogatory names without anyone hearing my side of the story.

We met early last year, he was just out of school without a job but I still accepted him regardless. I had a stubborn ex that wouldn't go away so he was taking care of my bills while I was dating my new boyfriend which he was well aware of. I later had an issue with the ex that led to him calling the police on me accusing me of stealing the iPhone 7 that he bought for me while insisting that I return it or he would take the matter to his village and make sure I run mad. I stood my ground amid all the threats held on to the phone.

Coincidentally, things picked up for my guy when the ex left, he started getting lots of freelance gigs online so I didn't feel the absence of the old guy. My boyfriend made sure I didn't lack anything even without me asking. I had to break up with him once because I felt he was doing too much and I might be running him down. He laughed it off and gave me screenshots of some of his account balance.

Fast forward to this year and things went south again, The gigs stopped coming in, and some of the firms he worked for closed shop so he was surviving on his savings which were depleting very quickly. It's worthy to note that before now the major issue that I have had with him is the way he sees my relationships with other men. He practically doesn't want me to have male friends or even go on harmless sitouts with friends. He thinks it's a disrespect to him for me to have anything to do with other guys while I am in his place.

This has resulted in serious fights each I come back from seeing a friend, At times he gets so mad that he flings my things outside to go stay with whoever I went to see.

Meanwhile, things have been very tough for him recently to the extent that feeding has become difficult. He quickly invested in a farm with with a friend when his savings were going down and used the remaining money to startup a blog. Now it's looking as if the guy he's doing the farm business with has scammed him because it's been from one story to the other and he's so broke right now that he can't even afford data to write content for his blog which we all know blogging is even saturated and takes time to start paying.

I started work two weeks ago and I have been the one taking care of my transport fare, he only gives me 1k once in a while to support. It's this same men he doesn't want me to communicate with that has been helping me out all this while. He sits at home all day waiting for the proceeds of the farm so he can start mini importation of wigs.

Every guy that asks me out seems to be well to do than my guy and it really bothers me. They all have nice cares and ready to spend while my own guy now depends on begging to feed. Even though he's smart and all but I don't know where the break through will come from and it seems I am wasting my time with him.

On Monday was my off day and I was at home, I woke up with a mood swing so I wasn't talking to him. He was busy cleaning the house without mentioning breakfast so I had to call someone to come get breakfast for me. He got mad at me tagging it an insult to him. It caused issues and I left the house and dared him to do his worst and he asked me not to leave because I needed some positive vibes since he was boring me with his attitude. I actually went to my family house but he feels I always go to see a guy each time I leave the house.

I came back around 8pm to meet the house locked and he kept ignoring my calls knowing fully well that I didn't leave with my key and I wasn't feeling fine and needed to take my drugs. I got drenched by the rain and my sickness go worst. He came back home by 11pm that night.

Now I haven't been able to go to work for the past three days and he's been running around buying drugs and food on credit so I can get well when he caused it. On the other hand a guy that has been giving me stuffs asked me to take a break from work and rest and he will give me my full salary.

I am just confused, it seems I am leaving better things out there for a broke guy and it's bothering me. What do you guys think I should do

Please ignore any typos, I wrote in a hurry

IconicR:
Mtcheww, I don't have nice things to tell a graduate who is still confused about dating. Is the single 40yr old man interested in marrying you or interested in just sleeping with you, which one?

I think he wants to marry me but I am not attracted to him at all, I don't like his company and always feel as if I am with my uncle when I am with him

Babamide:
There is a long road ahead of you in preparing for nysc and life ahead. You should be able to make a simple decision between a boyfriend and 20k monthly or manfriend and 50k monthly.

It's not really about my boyfriend, I am scared of the result of staying with the man, he has tried to rape me before

Good afternoon everyone, I am currently in a fix and doesn't know my way around the cross road that I have found myself in. I will try to be very brief.

I just graduated not long ago and just finished my project a couple of weeks back. I've been looking for a job and submitted my cv is some places.

Now there is a single man in his mid forties that has been on my case, he has bailed me financially several times and already shown interest in me and my boyfriend knows about the man. He is also aware that the man tried to force himself on me when I went to visit him on two separate occasions but I managed to escape.

The man offered to connect me to a job that pays 50k in abj while I stay in a room in his apartment since he's not always in town. Now this is an upgrade to the 20k jobs that I've been seeing in my present location but my issue is that my boyfriend is against me staying in the man's house because he knows the man is interested in me.

Instead, he is suggesting I stay with my rich uncle that resides in Abj but the issue is that the man is too strict and everyone in the family avoids him so I can't possibly stay there.
My guy is facing some financial challenges and I can't depend on him right now. On the other hand I am not free with this man, I am always jittery around him and can't wait to leave. He's already playing a boyfriend role now and I am scared he will just colonize me if I stay with him and probably start thinking about marriage which I don't want at all because I just get that father or uncle vibe whenever I am around him.

Should I stay back in my location and look for better jobs or should I move to Abj and damn the consequences of living with the man because I already know the outcome?

Seun mynd44 Dominique