₦airaland Forum

@ Akuviv , tanx guy

still remember the pranks we children at home play anytime we want to talk about my grandmother in her presence we do say it in English becos she was an english illiterate but she got us 1 day while talkin about her someone said mama (dats wat we call her) and she replied ki ni mama seoo meaning (what did mama do) : now she understands English to some extent I am thinking of we children learning french so we will be able to apply the formula 4 my parents too, abi

Dis post av been really funny can't help laughing thumbs up guys

Still remember my grand mum of blessed memory miss her direly during the tyme she was staying with us one day we had a guest and as they were about to go said we should pray with the TV still on but the volume reduced be4 d prayer we were watching wrestling, but during the prayer my grand mum exclaimed iru adura wo len gba yi, se eni wa la won ki won to no ra won pa ni, meaning (which kind of prayer are u guys praying won't you seperate dis people be4 dey beat dem selves to death) men dat day we 1 laugh die

Still remember wat we did during prayer back then in our house each individual is alloted a day to lead the family devotion, den wen we were still small we do use winners devotional book (maybe our daily bread can't remember d name) men big big grammar full the book den oooooo remember dat we were still small and my dad must not hear you make any error in ur pronunciation of words he tinks u shuld know which were almost all words back den so we do get scolded greatly dat is dat wat u can't pronounce , men it was bad till I discovered dat my elder bro do av less/no prob when leadin i asked him how he did it and he told me any paragraph he sees that contains big word he jst skipped it and because it was only 1 copy we av and it was only d person that leads that carry his/her bible men come see skippin wen idey lead sometimes 4rm verse one i fit jump to verse four wen readind d bible daily devotion book nko men dat 1 no get equal skippin paragraphs na understatement 2 wetin i do, gud news was dat we were neva caught sha, maybe dey taught our english pronunciation had improved

3 guys died wen dey got 2 heaven's gate St.Peter asked dem of how dey got der, 1st guy said i got info dat my wife was cheating on me went to d hotel i heard dey wer wen i got der i saw her in d room naked but der was no man der jst den i discovered a man downstairs runnin 2 his car suspecting him 2 be d 1 carried d cupboard 2 throw @ him 4rm d third floor while tryin 2 throw it i fell out of d window wit it & met myself here. D 2nd man started i ws late 4 a meeting while runnin 2 my car a cupboard landed on me & i found myself here. den st.peter asked d third guy wen he didn't talk wat happened, he replied ''i was in d cupboard''

A buglar broke into a house saw some cash on d table & pucked it into his pocket he heard a voice say Jesus sees u, he was afraid dodged for a while till wen he discovered d coast was clear came out & took d discman on d table again he heard a voice say Jesus sees u, now more terified he trails d voice only 2 discover it was a parrot.satisfied by d result he asked d parrot 4 its name, d parrot replied i'm moses surprised he exclaimed wat kind of a man will name his parrot moses. D parrot replied ''same man dat named his Rotweiler(dog) Jesus''

godmother was caught for a traffic offence,after waiting all day & when it got to her turn the judge ajourned d case to the next day
getting annoyed godmother exclaimed what a goddam court to hell with the judge, to hell with the law.
The judge being tired due to a stressful day could not take it, ordered N5,000 for contempt of court,seeing godmother reach 4 her wallet & glancing tru d judge replied you Don't have to pay now. godmother replied i know, jst want to check if i have more money for three more words

Stella:Dad Jane broke my toy
Dad: how did she do it?
Stella: I hit her on the head with it

[/color]
Romade & Lola(wife) were on d road wit romade on top speed sudenly dey were flagged down by a cop & d following
ensured between them:
Cop: Sir, do u notice u were on stop speed
Romade: I never noticed,Thot d required speed on dis highway was 180km/h
Lola: it's a lie u know i Hav been telling u to slow down since but u refused
Romade: shut up & keep quiet
cop:sir, can i see your license
(romade hands over d license)
cop: do u notice dat ur license hav expired
Romade: no never knew sir dat it has expired
Lola: Don't mind him i have been telling him since last week he neva listened
Romade: keep ur Goddam mouth shut
Cop: Madam is this how he talks to u always
Lola: No, only when drunk


[color=Black]
Romade went for a job interview after dey hav glanced tru all his credentials d employers said
we have a opening for people like you. Romade with enthusiasm & excitement asks were sir.His emploter replied it is called a door

Ben d new employer stood be4 d machine looking confused, A staff passing by saw him & decided 2 help collecting the fat report
from him she feeds it into the paper shredder. Ben replied thanks Ma but were do d copies come out 4rm