₦airaland Forum

This guy is pathetic .

Hadeynike001:
I have been abused several times.just last night he threatened to hurt me in front of my kids.pastor,his family,my family and friends have tried talking him out of it.I have talked to him several times but still no changes.after what happened last night the next thing is for me to quietly leave to avoid untimely death.I need a new life

I need help like a good job so that I can start all over with my kids

modestatus:
Well done madam.

You're trying your little best for your husband, but I'm not sure this is the avenue to go about it. Not on nairaland sha.

I couldn't read all the responses and I don't know if my point hasn't been already mentioned. I'm also sure you have noticed the responses on this platform make jest of a serious issue like your marriage.

Therefore, here's my little two-pence from a doctor's table. There's something called gambling addiction. It will take a lot of help from YOU, his friends, and his extended family to get him out. That's the essential social support group, even as everyone gets him to see a doctor get him to see what he's destroying...

Not just his home, but the life of his wife and children. Perchance, he will see reason, otherwise, he might be medicated... Of course, you know that is another problem on its own.

An addict doesn't care what's destroyed, because he/she has no insight into what's happening, how it's affecting his social life, his work life, not to mention his matrimonial home. I suggest you get as much help as you can on this challenge before you.

Family and friends who have had your back in the past will have their loyalty tested now.

I suggest you get your pastor on board

Get your side of the family involved too. No one can do this, running alone

Lastly, you women know when, and how to talk to your husbands to get what you want. This is not the time to stop, but the time to keep at it.

PS: as long as he's not physically assaulting you, or that you're suffering any form of abuse, this is the period when your affection will be tested.

He has to come out of this by seeing the problems he's obsessed with gambling is costing him. Loss of respect, loss of dignity, shame, and we're it not for the fact that he has a wife with him now, he would have been an outcast.

I'm sure there are support groups for this kind of thing but they're very few and far to reach. I'll look for a phone number you can contact.

I hope you're encouraged even if for a little bit.

I have been abused several times.just last night he threatened to hurt me in front of my kids.pastor,his family,my family and friends have tried talking him out of it.I have talked to him several times but still no changes.after what happened last night the next thing is for me to quietly leave to avoid untimely death.I need a new life

Kobojunkie:
Hadeynike001, the above is information that could potentially help your husband if he decides to get professional mental health treatment.

He doesn't want to change,instead anytime he loses he will just transfer the anger on me by shouting at me in front of my kids or beat me.

Kobojunkie:
Do you have work of your own? If not, please find some way of bringing in money to your marriage rather than continuing to depend 100% on your husband please.

If what your husband is struggling with is an addiction, I am afraid there isn't much you can do for him except maybe convince him to seek mental health therapy for treatment to what is mental illness. You can support him in his getting treatment with the love you have for him and maybe also make arrangements to see if he can drop feeding money before he bets the rest.

P.s. Do not bother engaging in the typical fasting and praying rituals on his behalf as those only add undue stress to your own life. Spend that energy instead on working to provide for your family.

Thanks a lot,I will try this

Good day family,please help me am tired of my marriage.my husband's life is being ruined by betting.He bet virtually every penny.
My husband started betting 5years ago.family,friends,pastor and myself had adviced him,he will look sober but at the end he will still go back to it.
He doesn't have a kobo in his account.He earn below 100k but I told him if we plan well with my own little salary we will achieve something good.we have 2kids.
He drop money for feeding whenever he like.He call different people begging for money to feed us after betting his salary away.I love my husband but I don't know how to help him.
I need your advice,please