₦airaland Forum

Divaan:
According to you, the society frowns at having sex before marriage; that the society frowns at having sex before marriage does not mean people are not having sex. There are more people having premarital sex than those who are not.

If you want my realistic view, I 'll say sex is a very big thing and a very big deal. People often underplay the act of sex. Before entering into it, be rest assured that it doesn't guarantee marriage and be medically well informed. Sex can be a risk and with the stds(sexually transmitted diseases) that could come with it, you want to be sure you're doing it with the right person. So, the ball eventually lies in your hand. It has less to do with religion but more to do with your health, psychology, mind and morality.

In your case, I'll advise you reassess your relationship to find the 'missing link' as it may not be sex.

Thank you. I'll reassess to find the missing 'link'as you've suggested.

duduade:
Me I belong to the house which believes that you must try out the merchandise before marriage

But not every time o 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂

Work on the defects 😂 😂 😂 😂

Talk more to each other 😂 😂 😂 😂

Be open to each other about it

No one wants stories that can touch the heart

Are you serious?
Most African homes wouldn't even entertain such

Kobojunkieee:
1. Humans and hypocrisy are 5&6. Learn this now, and you will save yourself a lot of unnecessary concern. Not saying you should ignore it— do not—, but you should not let it keep you from being who you are and the best at that.

2. Do not ignore those warning signs.

3. Live your life according to, not society's current delusion, but your terms.

4. Ask yourself this: what are the tangible — not delusions or presumptions or biases —reasons that exist for why you should not have sex outside of marriage? And what proof exists to show that — both men and women alike, again beyond relusions and fumes in the brain — having sex only in marriage leads to a more fulfilled, happier, peaceful existence for individuals and maybe others in society as well?

I bet that after you have truly processed these questions against the reality of things, you would realize you have been worrying over meaningless things.

** If you decide to have sex, make sure to use protection — both to prevent unwanted pregnancies and STDS.

.

Thank you. I think I have something to work with now.

Good evening everyone,

I thought of bringing this issue here to get more realistic perspectives about the reality of sex in relationships today.

First, the hypocrisy surrounding sex in today's relationship is something I'm still trying to understand. I think most people are having sex in their relationships and will come online to pretend they haven't even seen other person's unclothedness.

I'm confused as to what to do in my own case. My partner and I are in a committed relationship with a view to tying the knots when we finally get there but I feel something is still missing.

For mature minds here, how did you navigate your relationships given the fact that the society frowns at having sex outside the tennets of marriage? Since it's often said that having sex outside marriage is bad.
Both male and female, how did you handle yours and still ended up being married?

Mods, please move to front page

P.S
I don't want any religious sermon. I need a realistic and holistic experience.
Thank you

Good evening everyone,

I thought of bringing this issue here to get more realistic perspectives about the reality of sex in relationships today.

First, the hypocrisy surrounding sex in today's relationship is something I'm still trying to understand. I think most people are having sex in their relationships and will come online to pretend they haven't even seen other person's unclothedness.

I'm confused as to what to do in my own case. My partner and I are in a committed relationship with a view to tying the knots when we finally get there but I feel something is still missing.

For mature minds here, how did you navigate your relationships given the fact that the society frowns at having sex outside the tennets of marriage? Since it's often said that having sex outside marriage is bad.
Both male and female, how did you handle yours and still ended up being married?

Mods, please push to the front page

P.S
I don't want any religious sermon. I need a realistic and holistic experience.
Thank you

7buckz:
Oya na enjoy your heart break Mr man

Hmm

Ruthie0224:
Get busy or get involved with other people.

It doesn't have to be anything deep.

Making new friends can distract you from the pain.

Yeah, that is what I have been doing and I feel very much alive now.

Thank you!

7buckz:
Igbo and shayo... And her thoughts will be off your mind

Thanks man! But I don't drink neither do I smoke

Time heals all kind of heartaches. It's three months already and son of man feels very much alive!

The students are the ones on the receiving end.

It is not easy to be a student in Nigeria.

Imagine, using 6 years to study a four -year course or 7 years for a five-year course. It's disheartening

Gee64:
Then, forget her...please!

I never said I wanted to date her afterwards

ceede2:
I whatever you going thru it's your fault

How?

Blunttruth:
That's the only way she can move on.. people are different

Alright
Thanks!

Blunttruth:
It's either you are together or not. Why do you want complications? You clearly can't date. If she doesn't want you in her life as a friend, respect that and give her space. . Give it time, time heals everything.
P.S just read your reason for separation
I respect the girl , she is thinking with her head not her heart.

Thank you!
But at least, she shouldn't have acted rashly. I do not even have it in mind to do anything with her anymore. That part of me is gone.
Personally,I do not subscribe to parting ways if we fail to date. After all, we were friends before things took another turn

worldclass68:
Lol...u dont even know whether nah dog dey bang who u won kill ursef ontop...

She is not that kind of a person

immortalcrown:
Leave her and suppress the feeling. Or, impregnate her and battle the decision to either commit abortion or own a sick baby. Body no be firewood. Staying close for long will lead to romance. Again, staying so close all the time will make both of you feel too bad about your nature (about the phenotype). Let her find her match. You should find your own match. Every pain has a gain and every gain has a loss.

Thanks
I've already suppressed my feelings in that regard for her. God forbid I use my own hands to bring problems for myself.
I just wanted things to go back to the status quo. We were good friends before we thought about taking a step forward

immortalcrown:
You never say your problem. You still dey hide am. Wetin be de physical factor wey dey beyond your control?

Genotype

How do I forget someone I was once close with?
I have known her for almost two years. We had things in common and the feelings were mutual.
Unfortunately, we couldn't start any relationship due to some circumstances beyond us.
That part of me wanting to go into a relationship with her had quietly died a natural death due to these circumstances that were beyond us. However, I still want her presence in my life regardless of whatever has happened. Also, I am not in any way preventing her from being in a relationship.
Unfortunately, she said she could not as the physical and emotional attractions are still there.
Now, she has blocked me on all platforms.
My dilemma is;
How do I get her off my mind because it seems as if I am hooked?
And my question is: "is it necessary for there to be something going on between two adults before a worthwhile connection can be made?"
P.S
I never wanted her to go regardless of the struggle with the physical and emotional attractions
Also, I see no reason why she should do any of that since we never dated
Cc
Lalasticlala