₦airaland Forum

My Personal Experience:

Hey, you're so fine, 'naive'!
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About twenty-something years ago, while I was in secondary school, precisely JSS2, a senior student led me on this vile path to masturbation. (Some boarding school students may have a better understanding of this, as this is sometimes when some get inducted into the homosexual lifestyle.)
This particular senior student became very nice to me, and I thought it was normal, as it should be. However, he had ulterior motives, and I would soon discover. (Got to know later in life that this is called grooming.) That experience made me wary of people who are nice to me for no reason. At the back of my mind will be the pulsating question, 'What is your angle?'
It was labor day (labor day in my school is when students are given a portion of a bush to cut or a lawn to care for), and he was tasked with supervising my class. He got me exempted from labor duty that day and asked me to accompany him around as he moved from site to site to inspect other students' labor portions. While making the rounds, he mentioned he wanted to urinate and would use one of the bushes as cover. Somehow, we were behind the bushes urinating, and there I was introduced to masturbation.
The first time, the wave of feeling that shot through my system was like nothing I had ever experienced. Time momentarily stopped, so that it felt like I had caught a glimpse of eternity. (The senior was soon expelled from the school shortly after that. And I wonder what would have been my fate had he remained).
I soon began to crave that feeling; this feeling helped me to momentarily forget a lot of the emotional pain I was dealing with. It was ultimately a trap. In the Northern hemisphere, Innuits have a way of killing a wolf. They'll smear the blade of a knife with the blood of a seal and let the blood freeze on the blade. They'll add another layer of blood and let that freeze, too. The process is continued until the blade is well coated. Then they bury the handle of the knife in the ice with the blade sticking straight up. The wolf smells the blood and starts licking the blade. Soon, the blade starts cutting into the wolf's tongue, but the wolf's thirst for blood overrides the pain, so the wolf continues licking the blade, not realizing that it's now tasting its blood, and ultimately it bleeds to death. I became the wolf and the bladed blood popsicle; you guessed right, porn and masturbation.
This began my spiral into this troubled world of masturbation. I noticed how guilty and filthy I typically would feel after it.
And soon, I couldn't go a day without masturbating. At this point, maybe if I had the right counsel, I could have snapped out of it.
At some point, a classmate introduced me to porn magazines, and that became the fuel for masturbation. I would go through great lengths to get porn materials to feed on so I could masturbate.
At this point, I was only able to stop masturbating for about a week or two before the urge would kick in.

What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? God forbid!
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Along the way, I found about two or three porn VHS tapes at home, and that just sucked me deeper into the act. The owner is a family member who keeps their room locked when away from the house. I found the spare key to the room and had unhindered access. Soon, it was DVDs that I would go buy under the cover of the night, and finally, internet porn.
It affected my life; I became mediocre at everything. At the mediocre level I was operating at, people still thought I was a champion of some sort. I knew better. I have a sense of what has been deposited in me.
Now, I know it's called grace. God showered me with his grace in that state of lasciviousness.
I genuinely wanted to quit, and every time I try to exercise my will to quit, I often will have very sensual and erotic dreams that, in two to three days max, I'm back at it. I'd binge-watch through the night and get at it. I'd despise myself thereafter. This became a perpetual cycle, over 20+ years.


Let there be Light!
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Shortly before I got married, I cried out to the Lord, and He heard me. I felt a force leave me; it felt like a force leaving forcefully through my mouth. I no longer had the appetite for the old habit. But somehow, months later, I slipped and fell further. I didn't fully understand what had happened at that time.
This time, I became somewhat promiscuous; ladies were willingly throwing themselves at me, and I would pursue some even if it meant paying. I experienced Matthew 12:43-45 firsthand.
I'd often choose to watch porn and masturbate over fornication and reason that it was a lesser evil, forgetting Matthew 5:28.
Even after fornicating, I'd still seek out porn. Felt like it had me in a choke hold. This happened on two other instances, and the paths to how I slipped back were very similar. The Holy Spirit helped me to track how I got triggered and how I would yield to the demon enticing me with seemingly innocent content, especially on X formerly Twitter. And that will begin my journey down the rabbit hole.
Before you know it, I'm on X-rated sites. Note, this enticement could go on for weeks, and I'll be knowingly opening the gateway for lust to grow, rationalizing that it's harmless lewd content, which only made me want more, and then would subsequently lead to X-rated content.

This kind goeth not out but by prayer and fasting. Matthew 17:21
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I recently got delivered. I was on a fast (day 1) and was randomly praying along with a video ministration from YouTube, it wasn't even a live stream.
I felt that demon expelled the same way I had experienced it during my first deliverance, and the appetite for porn and masturbation left. I know that this would be the final. So long as I trust God and obey His nudges.

And I can tell you without an iota of doubt that I'm free. Now, I'm armed with the knowledge that the demons are actively looking for gateways to try and get back in. They'll bring back porn scenes or old encounters with women, as if saying... don't you miss this? 2 Corinthians 10:5, Romans 12:2.
During my botched deliverances, God helped me to track the triggers and pathways used by these demons. God used this to help me identify the subtle tricks the demons try to use to get me back.
For me, aside from the images being projected, there'll be a girl who is suddenly interested in knowing me or an old flame. My prayer life typically takes a dive around this period. Another tool is social media, specifically, X formerly Twitter, Telegram, and even Instagram.
I now pay attention to the music I listen to; some secular/carnal music are infused with the spirit of lust, and I have edited my friends/associations.
I pay attention to what I watch (some shows are gateways for one demon to open the door for the demon of lust, which then opens it for the demon of porn and masturbation).
I'm completely off social media until I sense God tells me to return.
It's been beautiful. I feel that freedom mentioned in John 8:36. I don't have any of the old desires; I can sense the Holy Spirit.
Thank you, Jesus!


But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, to those who believe in His name. John 1:12
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If you are experiencing any problem with porn and masturbation addiction, please join me saying this short prayer out aloud:

Lord Jesus, I believe you died for my sins, and I believe you rose again for my justification.
I therefore confess my indulgence in porn and masturbation and that I have yielded my body to lust. (Confess any other sin the Holy Spirit brings to your memory.)
I believe that you defeated sin, Satan, hell, and the grave, and you have transferred that victory to me.
I now belong to you, as I have been purchased by the price of your blood, and in your blood there is redemption, even the forgiveness of sin, and today I denounce such activity as I receive eternal life into my spirit.
Therefore, I command in the name of Jesus Christ and with the authority that has now been given to me through his death that any spirit entity powering porn and masturbation in life to come out in the name of Jesus!
Thank you Jesus for you have answered my prayer, Amen!


These messages helped me.
You can search on YouTube for Apostle Joshua Selman's Mystery of Deliverance.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F5iDvPRhtfI&t=4s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfiwGGn_kC0

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AeVEayqwwns

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZQR-yYplbk0