₦airaland Forum

Finestlex:
Be your own boss for once.. He acts shitty cos he believes you're gonna apologize always, a nigga is taking advantage of your weakness. Good Nigerians are not easy to find abroad, He'll definitely call or come see you if you don't contact him... i give you my words!! unless he doesn't care about you. what part of Canny are you in? i'm in North York, Toronto

Thanks, I've called it off and I am giving myself time away from guys for now including him if he calls. I'm in Calgary

emsheddy:
My dear, if u dont walk out of that relationship now, u will regret it later. These are the signs for you to know the guy aint for real. Dont be scared of finding anoda. If u r a good girl like u sound, a better guy will come your way in no time. Dont be scared to pull the plug on him jor. Forget about ur emotional nature, there are lots of matured minds here who can help u be a better person n supress any tears u wanna share shud u leave him. Take the bull by the horn dear.

I keep thinking of all the good times. He is a good guy. He supports my career, gives me advice and he is there for me every single time. I have also noticed him try to be better in some other areas. Its just these other things. How do I know if his cons outweigh his pros. But this one definitely crossed the line. It hurts so much to let someone you care so much about go. I actually thought this was the last guy I was going to date. I had all these dreams for us but after every argument dreams diminish little by little.

I am submissive but not so I am trampled on. I just always want everything to be fine and him to be happy. Its just so painful to the extent I feel a pain in my chest!

Monicasque:
Wait till both of u r calm. Den discuss with him how i feel dat it's disrespect for him to wana have sex in yo parent's home, while they r still there on top of it. Make him understand dat u have values and prinscipals, and u wud love for him to respect u.remind him dat u r nt his wife, so da same cant happen in his parents home wen they r there.if he understands fine. Ask him to learn how to behave, if he does nt understand or still behaves the same, explain to him dat u love him, bt u wud rather b alone dan b made to feel like a intimacy gadget or trash. Wen u den move to yo next relationship, try stay away from sex, explain to yo new guy dat u r nt a virgin, bt u have changed and want things differently dis time. If a guy realy loves u, even though he can want to have sex with u, he wil nt disrespect u or yo family.and most often he can even understand dat u have decided to wait til the right time for sex.maybe wen yals r already married so dat he can get it anytime he wants it.if someone wil nt treat u right today, wat makes u think tomorow will b any different? To me it sounds as if yo bf is over familiar with u and yo family and probably sees himself marrying u without treating u right or him doing things right.he thinks he is all u can do. Show him u can do better

After he got mad and left, I gave him 2days to cool down and think about it. On the 3rd day he called me and acted like nothing happened. I asked him if he wants to talk about what happened, he asked me if I want to explain myself. I got mad and I raised my voice telling him how disrespectful it was and how it means he looks at me as someone with no values. In the end he gave an ultimatum to call him by the end of the day. I did not call!

HizMissy:
is d guy still in canada or is he back?

he is here in Canada with me. Same city

adepiero:
The truth is that the guy is a player. though he is still a learner

If a guy truly loves you, he won't only show it in his character but he will always find every means to express it. The guy is all about sex!

I need you to think and ask yourself when last you had a meaningful conversation with this guy! secondly, if there was any conversation at all, how did it end? my guess is sex or fight.

so better you open your eyes to reality or close them and keep acting dumb

We talk about everything, life, family, career....he's even the reason why I am doing my MBA. Also, we do not have sex that often. Once every 3 weeks or so and it not like he doesn't see me often. We hang out almost everyday. This behavior just baffled me

Hi,

This is my first time doing this but I feel like I have to. I do not have anyone to talk to since. If I talk to my mum she will hate him and I do not want that, she's close friends with his mum. I can not trust any friends to talk to about my relationship so I will just complain here and see if it helps.

My boyfriend has been here in Canada for over 10yrs but he was born and grew up in Nigeria. My parents know him well because we have been family friends since I was 5 so he comes over to the house frequently. This time he came and somehow we were alone upstairs and my mum was downstairs. He started fiddling me, wanting to have sex. I said NO that my mum was downstairs. I said no over and over but he would not stop. I then told him if he does not stop I would go downstairs where everyone is. He said If I did he would leave so I went downstairs and he left. Now he is mad at me.

1. I feel like this is very disrespectful to my mum; Like it has gotten to his head that every time he comes my mum cooks for him and welcomes him well (He knows that my mum knows we are dating but my dad doesn't)

2. I have tried to talk to him and explained how this changes how I see him (Like he has lost his Nigerian Values)

3. The fact that he does not see it as disrespectful is making me question everything like;
I know he is a bit controlling but I'm wondering if we got married if it would be worse
I know he is egoistic but too egoistic to not see that disrespecting my mom is wrong?
We have been together for over two years and he has never said he is sorry or he loves me. He shows it and he has got me a card that says it and he calls me 'my love' on few occasions be he has never said it or ever said he is sorry; he always somehow twists the situation to be my fault.

This thing is just bringing up all these other things that I probably I have be burying inside and covering up with things like he shows me to all his friends and colleagues and makes me laugh and other things. I'm just confused and hurt. I am a very emotional person and I am scared I am going in too deep to something that will hurt me in future.

Advice please