₦airaland Forum

Dear Nairalanders I am a regular user on this forum but I decided to use an alternate account for this.

The truth is there is a lot going on in my life that I have no control over. A lot of things that when I think about them I just feel so hopeless and sad.

I have been depressed and in pain for quite some time now and I have tried to do things that make me happy just to provide an escape from the steel cages of depression.

Nairaland has helped me to forget the pain and sadness that I am passing through, but it seems it isn't just enough.

I know some people will say things like draw closer to God and all that, but the truth is, I did that and God forsook me. He left me when I needed him most and he left me to suffer shame and reproach.

My family and friends don't have an idea of what's going on
All they see is a happy, intelligent lady who seems to have everything she wants.
But how long will I continue to wear the mask of happiness when there is a heavy tumoil brewing up on my inside.

How does one escape from a situation that looks like there is obviously no way out?
What's the point of being alive when you already feel dead?

Suicidal thought flood my thoughts all the time. Whenever I feel sad or I am in a bad mood, all I can see is the image of me stabbing myself with a knife or me standing in front of the road waiting for a car to hit me and end my miserable life.

Right now, I feel worse than ever and I don't know if I can bear this till the end of this week.
Please I need advice.

Super mods please do this for me and send this topic to the home page.
I posted this on this section because it has more active users

Cc
Ishilove
Lalasticlala