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Skrrrrrrr:
Guy dead that talk... Temi Otedola is not even pretty. The gap Erica give her reach from sokoto to Lagos... She is just rich ni. You can argue Cuppy and Erica but Temi? Nah

This Yemi is not pretty. Your eyes needs washing

PrimadonnaO:
I know what it feels like being with an insecure man. Been there before. Always needing reassurance... always blowing things out of proportion...always sniffing to find what's not fishy! The most exasperating thing there could ever be!


As it is, you've just got to manage him like that. But perhaps you should first have a heart to heart conversation with him on how his actions are unsettling.

Thank you. Its really tiring.

bukatyne:


She most likely won't.

Men like the OP's husband don't 'pretend' before marriage. They are so confident they are God's gift to women that they will lay their cards on the table.

OP has been cowering, let her continue.

If she refused to retrieve her line because he said so, what really is SM password that the OP is fretting about except if she is a SM influencer, celebrity or it is a business account?

He pretended o. The moment bride price was paid was when I started seeing signs that he is a control freak. I didn't want to marry him so he did everything on the book to get me. Story changed after he got me.


If I was the cowering kind, I would have submitted password two years ago. I can't relinquish everything in the name of marriage. My social media is my social media. He can do whatever he likes with his, let me do what I like with mine.

bukatyne:
@bold:

Yoi know you both have bigger problems that swapping of passwords would not solve.

Your husband (from your account) sounds like the traditional Nigerian husband who wants to rule and not lead.

You sound like you are the modern Nigerian wife expecting a husband to lead and not rule.

Find whatever made you two see past your different worldviews to marry and keep at it.

You will need it for the long ride.

I don't nag, I don't stress him, I let him be. But he just won't let me be with this social media thing. And if I give in, will I keep giving in to his every whim.

Elder0001:
Fake story.

Tales by moonlight everywhere.

Why would someone share a fake story though. Is there payment for it? Once someone writes decently and uses a new account, it's a fake story to you guys. Shift abeg. Not everyone likes to share their issues with their main moniker.

Acidosis:
Your social media password?? Do people still log on to Facebook, IG, Twitter, WhatsApp, or Etc now that we all make use of Apps? Can't remember using my password on WhatsApp or Facebook since I started using android OS (unless of course, times I changed my phone).

All you need to gain access to anyone's social media page these days is the phone password unless you're the type that locks your App with a third party App locker.

If your phone password is the issue, I would advise you both to know your passwords. You're going to need it days you least expect. It also shouldn't be a big deal especially if that's all you need to gain each others' trusts.

Trust is not gotten automatically, it requires work, communication, sharing of passwords, etc. If anyone tells you they trust you without any of these, they're simply saying that they trust their idea and perception of you. They cannot trust the part of you that you have consistently refused to share.

As regards the photo thing, communication is key. Some people do not enjoy the whole idea of uploading photos on the social media. However, if you both upload your individual pictures or pictures of others (random friends even friends of opposite gender), then it would be wrong to say you can't upload photos of your spouse. What is it you're hiding?

He's 6 months in Nigeria and 6 months abroad. But when he's around his phone is always passworded while mine isn't because I have nothing to hide.

This quest for social media password isn't more because of insecurity but more a quest to control. If he succeeds with this, what next will he be pushing for. I'm honestly tired!

JONNYSPUTE:
....Are you ashamed of your hubby?
Why can't you post his pics on your wall.?

You are making him suspect you are cheating on him by this actions of it's not being able to post his pics and blocking him making him believe you ve delated your account.

He has never posted me. There's no sign on his page that he's even married. I never obsess about that. Why is he obsessed with my SM? I've posted him on my page a couple of times but deleted when I thought we were breaking up. I just refused to post back because I can't be doing post and delete. Why can't he just let me be!

pocohantas:
It’ll piss me off too. Reminds me of the NLder whose gf started posting her pictures on his WhatsApp status. What I am sure is, I will let him have the password. After that I will change it and he won’t have it again. Except he is ready to release his or say what is his problem.

Okay. Sounds reasonable

bukatyne:
So what brought it to the fore now?

@control thing: You mean your husband just woke up three years ago and asked for the passwords of your SM? No preceeding event?

Are there other ways he is trying to 'control' you?

He tried to get me to change the sim I had been using for years immediately after we got married. I refused. The phone got lost one day and he told me to get a fresh sim and not retrieve the old number. . I did, so that peace can reign. Since then he's been on my social media. Stressing me about it.

missimelda01:
As it is now, nothing you say or do can change his motives. Tell him to give you his passwords too, give him yours only after he has done that.
As long as you're not hiding anything, he'll get tired of monitoring you eventually.
And if he posts anything with your account, it shows he's not matured enough, change the password! But give him a chance first.

He refuses to give me his and when I ask, he says it's because he's the one marrying me and not other way around. That he has the rights to my social media but I don't have the right to his.
This is really stressing me out. When people are having real issues in their unions, mine is social media. In the past this same issue have snowballed into something ugly. We were even on the verge of breakup. He says I disrespect him because I don't post his pictures. At some point, I had to block him and lied that I've deleted the account so I can have peace. But he later figured out I blocked him and continued stressing me about it.

pocohantas:
Give him, so that he can calm down. After he is done looking, ask him if he will rest now.

I can give him because I truly have nothing to hide but what if he starts posting his pictures. That would really upset me.

bukatyne:


Why does he want your SM passwords?

I have no idea. I think it's a control thing.

This social media thing have been a recurring issue in our 3 years of marriage. He can't just let it rest.

I'm seeing a lot of judgment but not seeing advices. Advice is all I need now.

Nackzy:
There's no trust again in your marriage
You want the truth?
Your Husband is cheating on you and you're Cheating on your husband as well

I'm not cheating

.