₦airaland Forum

Jona will still win

jimmy4x:
dt one go hard o, some boiz sef too sabi fall hand, y is he dull like dt na.
what trips u most in him sef.

Can't really say.......many things.

jimmy4x:
To me seriously, it makes no sense when a girl who's in a relationship and claims to love her bf collects gifts from toasters and admirers.
If he were to be just a platonic friend, dts understandable, buh someone who's interested in you, when.he knows u av a bf will only try to be all nice to u just to snatch u from ur bf nd na dere wahala dey start.
I'm sure ur bf won't be happy if he gets to know the new guy bot u d New phone and some other gifts he's not able to buy u yet.
look at the situation u put urself into now, ur gonna av to chuz between the two guys, I just really hope u haven't started cheating on ur man.
To all the ladies reading this, let me tell you this, most guys if not all, hardly do things for free, especially for girls we admire, many of us are just being nice to get what we want and once we get what we want, we may continue to be nice or chuz otherwise...it depends on the guy...be wise!!!

Bro, like i posted earlier. The both of them were just my friends. Was in no relationship then. When my boyfriend proposed,every other thing with the other guy stopped.

jimmy4x:
You are sooo happy now cos he told you what u wanna hear, so what are you planning on doing now??
is ur bf also shy nd quiet around you, his friends and family??
do u think he can be very friendly around ur folks later on??
how does he relate with your siblings??

He's relationship with my siblings is Kinda ok.
He's friends,same way he relates with me.
And yes,he is quiet. I do most of the talking.

Ronald4lif.......His comments are matured,mind blowing and educative
Buygala........Funny dude,funny comments. He makes me laugh

Mhizizzy:
So u AV started collecting stuffz from d oda Guy
Making decisions wud be hard ryt now

Sis. He was a friend and yes i collected gifts from him. But after the attraction started,it ended there.

kelvin100:
Here lies the problem.
Your boyfriend hasn't opened up to your parents enough for them to know him, they are simply weary of him.
They are more comfortable with who they already knew and could be a likeable character too.

Tell your boyfriend to communicate, feel free around your parents and really open up to them. He might still be uncomfortable because of the age difference.

hmmmmmm. You are sooo sweet!!!
Same thing an Aunt told me earlier today.
Thanks.

poik:
Maybe I am just being my old-fashioned self.
But you mean your parents condone your boifriends coming to your house to frolick with you, a tEenager who ought to be buried in her books without the distraction of a boy? Apart from the fact that its sinful? What kind of parents has Westernization made of us?
That's one.


Two, you are 'commited' to one person, yet you go as far as collecting gifts from another-we don't even know how many they are-and comparing the two? Your eye no dey house.
Different macaroni for different folks o, but there are things my own parents won't hear of.
My advice: be virtuous. Marry or face ur books.

You don't understand my post. I actually asked a question
Btw I'm not a teenager.

kpolli:
Lemme be as blunt as NL will allow me to be... When you accept a relationship with an individual, you need to give him some respect and if you have male friends that do not show that respect, cut them off...

Please explain the bolded statement, what ended there?

You want a direct answer, but as a Nigerian I will answer you with a question; who is in the relationship you or your dad? You're the one who knows best for yourself... You know which shoes fit.... Did your father start liking the other guy because of the gift? If so, then know it is because of material things your father said so, if not; he should explain further.....

Thanks bro.
what ended there was the gift thingy. He sent the last one during my birthday.

UniqueGem:
But if truly that is the real reason, do you think your Dad will have a problem telling you that? Itz simple psychology here, it's about what somebody find easy to disclose and what somebody find hard to let out. Your Dad or anybody else can easily tell you "hey, this your BF is too quite, he needs to be more outspoken" see?? There's nothing wrong with that statement. NOW, Imagine your Dad telling you "Hey Tega, your BF is poor, Mr Gift is rich, leave your Bf and marry MR Gift because he is more capable of taking care of Me, you, your mother and your sisters". It doesn't sound right and moreover it will hurt his prestige as a man, so that's why he's quite about his reasons. You take out time and ask him this privately.

Making sense. But my Dad is very much settled,very. That's why i ruled that out.

UniqueGem:
Okay babe, I'll be brief and blunt here, I think you've gat a gold digging family. With what you've written so far and your dads refusal to say why he dislikes your Bf but prefers the other guy, the only silent interpretation I see is "Forget this guy, he can't take care of you and our family, this other guy is more financially dependabe" you wouldn't expect your Dad to come plain and tell you something like that, so that's why he's boning that guy.
Now My Advice: I think you're somebody who will at some point give in to family pressure, if not this shouldn't be a case at all. Another observation is that you seem more familiar with the "gift guy" than you've written here, if not, he wouldn't know your house. Okay let's say he came to know your house out of coincidence, but how do we explain coming into your house with his friends and having a hearty chat with your father? The gift guy surely is more welcomed here. So what you should do is since I perceive you'll give in at some point, Just tell your Bf the way things stand. So he can either hang on and hope the gift guy one day disappears or he should move on with life before it's too late. I think the later option is a better one.

I understand you bro.
Check the other post n replies to AgapeCharis. I told him that my boyfriend does not talk,this kinda quiet type. And the oda guy relates wella and that's one of the thing i think pisses them off. hope you get?
And Gold digging?? Nah! My Dad is very much stable financially .
Or is there any oda meaning to Gold digging?

kpolli:
Because a guy interested in you (as you specified) is not a friend.... If your boyfriend had girls who wanted him visiting, how would you feel?

I don't know why you girls like keeping guys who want you as friends, you just introduce complications into your present relationship and when you (as you girls claim) "mistakenly" cheat... You will be wondering where it went wrong...

Like I said, you either plan on cheating or plan on dumping your present boyfriend because if you had any respect for him, you won't be associating yourself with "friends" interested in you nor taking them home

Now read carefully.
This guy and my boyfriend have been my friends since ages. My friends! My boyfriend made his intention knwn and i accepted him and all my male friends knw including this particular guy. They get me stuffs. but since the other guy started showing interest,it ended there. What i want is for the question i asked to be answered and not this unnecessary sermon. hope you get?

ronald4lif:
What else do one expect of him? He'll be devasted, it will weigh him down and should be a hard one for him to deal. But it should be a test of his love to you. He should work out on the modalities of creating a postive impression in the heart of your father. He rapport well with your brothers right?

Thanks bro. you've really answered the question.

baralatie:
it is a story!
I don't know how an affair that is not leading to marriage anytime soon from either is painted by you as "being acceptable to parents".even the mention of church sounds fictitious.
and already one can see a lot of things exploding!
I have no problem with people making plans but at least set priorities straight.

It seems you are more confused.
Re read my post and read the question at the end

vjsmiles:
yho dad has joined the gold digging community..

Post aint friendly bro.
He is still my father.

kpolli:
Why is the other guy visiting your family already? You're already planning to cheat or dump your boyfriend

The guy is MY friend oooooo. chaiii!!!
Why are you guys finding it hard to understand my post.

ronald4lif:
I'm afraid but you've to tell the new guy off. That's the logical and moral thing to do.

I have. The thing is my parent.
What do you think will happen if my bf finds out they don't like him

baralatie:
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
this your story get k leg!
your admiting to relationship sound unbelieving!

Still wondering why my story is k legged 2 you.
And the later part of your post,i don't understand.

ronald4lif:
Oh well. Given that he (your dad) has known him for years he must have his reasons for prefering him over your man, concrete ones. It could be his gentle nature, his family background and upbringing. Could also be his future prospect of becoming successful. Whichever reason(s) he has should be considered carefully.

But I'm still of the opinion that you stand your grounds and don't quit whatever relationship you have with your man, until he gives you strong reasons to. Let this new guy know you're already involve with someone else and it's only him and no one else. It'll also be helpful if you can reduce the frequency to which you both communicate. And just maybe stop collecting further gifts from him as that could be misconstrue that you're interested in him. Well, that's if you're not in to him already.

The other guy knows about my boyfriend already.

AgapeCharis:
[color=indigo]Well, it's not much of a problem. Maybe when you tell your dad why you prefer your boyfriend, he'll get to play along. You know our oldies tend to reason differently from us. It may just be one little thing like his physique or his accent or the way he walks or one small thing like that your dad just saw and saw and disliked thereby disliking everything about the guy. You could really get your dad to like him. You'll need a lot of patience though.

Just like ronald4lif pointed out....This new guy is the one that bought the device you're using currently. He has bought several gifts which you accept and show your parents. I think this is where the problem lies. Suppose you didn't give them the impression that this new guy "loves you so much" to the extent that he's already taking care of your needs (uplifting their burden), this issue wouldn't have come up.
[/color]

It seems so.....the gifts.
And one thing i noticed again. My boyfriend does not talk. I guess it pisses them off.

ronald4lif:
Has the new guy been a family friend before the attraction came up?. Like your dad and other family members new him for a long time now?

I really can't say when the attraction started.
Yes,they knw him. like 2yrs nw.

ronald4lif:
Okay. Just like someone earlier suggested you should find out from your dad why he doesn't like your boyfriend. You can do this by pleading with a brother of yours to find out from him as it might be convenience for them to ask him.

Your boyfriend as a final year student got loads of prospects to succeed after graduating, same as the new guy. He attends same church as you and they both are of same tribe as you as well. Only difference is the working aspect. That is likely to change after he's through with his studies so I don't seem to understand why your dad doesn't like him. It's not like the new guy is through with studies.

My advise is that you stand your grounds and don't let your father bamboozle you. Stick with your boyfriend he'll come around.

But permit to ask. How come you got so close to this new guy till the extend of receiving gifts from him when you're already involve with someone? It seems you're too close to him for comfort. No offense meant.

I'm not Igbo.
My Mum don't really like the tribe tho. But My Dad his cool with them wella.
The other guy was my friend before ‘‘the attraction'' came up.

falconey:
will be back to comment.



you said this is your 1st relationship you must be between 18- 22.

I say play along you still have time,is not like you are geting married or something.

Play along with my parents?

Cutehector:
As d adage says, wat an elder sits down and sees, d child who climbs an iroko tree may not be able to see it. Thr is more to it dan it meets d eye. I believ time will tell.

Ok o

MissAdeife:
Get a concise answer to why your dad hates your boyfriend first ..

No reason. That's what he said.

AgapeCharis:
[color=indigo]I have a few question for you.

Have your parents met this new guy??

What is about your boyfriend your parents don't like??

Why do they prefer the new guy??

Answer to these questions will go a long way.[/color]

Yes,they know this new guy.
Daddy said he has no reason. in his words and i quote ‘‘Nothing o,maybe i will get to like him''
he said that on the first of January. This is March and his feeling have nt change.
Mummy said she's studying him. *sighs*

iceberylin:
Dad is jealous of his replacement

lol. go and sleep joor

ronald4lif:
Is your boyfriend of a different tribe as you and is the new guy of same tribe.

Are they both of same faith (like same church as you) or different.

How about state?

Is your boyfriend up and doing well for himself as compared to the new guy?

Both of them are igbo.
My boyfriend is in his finals,aint working.
The other guy is a student and his working.
My boyfriend attends same church as me but a different branch.
The other guy attends AoG.
The other guy buys me stuffs.
The device I'm using he bought it.
This guy is working so the money is there.

Okay! I don't know what title to give this . But seriously, I'm confused. Came back home from school for the election and i remembered I got a birthday gift from a friend and i'm yet to show them to my parents,so after today's morning devotion i brought it out and they where like Wow!! This is beautiful.(got the gift from a guy who is interested in me) I got a boyfriend tho and they all know. But they where giving me reason why they prefer the other guy to my boyfriend .
It was crazy tho cos my siblings where there and the look on their faces was something else. My siblings like my boyfriend tho. During the Xmas break,my boyfriend came home to see me, after he left my father told me in the presence of my siblings that he does not like him,i asked him why,he gave no reason. He likes the other guy,and when that one visits he jokes with him and his friends. It's hurts. And this is my first relationship. My dad does not know how to hide his feelings,and i know that sooner or later my boyfriend will know what's up.
Has anyone been through this before
To the guys; How will you feel when you get know your girlfriend's parent don't like you?

Many people saying they can't cheat on their partner.....hmmmm.
One thing i pray is that i won't be in a situation that i have to cheat.

LOL.
Crazily weird and abnormal