The Lord is my Sheperd

hmmm, If you are so depresssssedddd and really want to go back, then go, but be sure of what you are doing.
You haven't gotten a definite job in Nigeria yet, hmm with your qualifications u should get a job back home. There are opportunities back home even if it's not working for somebody! Pray too! Always know your environment can't limit you if you don't let it

I am in a similar position only that i don't have any job offer from naij. I earn more than i can ever dream of in naij but i honestly think d sky is the limit with things you can achieve in naij with a very gud job.
so many negativity with high paying jobs here as u tend to be stuck (limited prospect of promotion) cos we will always be second citizen even if u were born here as such.
Don't know if u read about a bank (i think commerzbank or might be deutche bank) that will only make German white citizen head their respective strategic posts (positive discrimination if u read into it).

I shall not want

@Crossroads.

I am so happy that you r being honest with yourself. Most people living in UK know that it's a depressing environment , especially when you were not born here. There's a big difference between happiness and Money. No matter how you are paid here, you will still have that "emptiness" there because mama charly knows how to take it back.

In Nigeria, there's hope, happiness of being among your people and opportunity to be fulfilled. A lot of people could disagree with these, but this is my personal opinion. The greatest thing I feel one can get here is the certificate, and once you have it, it is left to you to be able to claim your return on investment, which I know can easily be realised in Nigeria.

I will suggest that you don't trade your future for their HSMP , limited leave to remain, indefinite etc. Those papers do not amount to happiness, fufilment and wealth. It's a white man style of deceiving the blacks. If you are reading the dailies and watching news well on tv, you will realise that heat has been turned on the foreign migrants, especially the blacks and the asians, and it can not get better(This is not a curse but the fact).

All said and done, pray to God to guide you , but be real and honest with yourself while making your decision.

Ta!

You took the right step by reaching out for help. I was once in your shoes and i made the decision to come home. The land is green here but you have to see it for yourself. I mean, its a pschological battle considering the many challenges here but with many answers and soultions too. The environment is for the most part depressing like someone rightly said (UK).

If you are starting to dream, then its very likely that there is something you are been told by Someone. For many of us, our instincts are one of the least things we utilise but are sooooooo significant. Moreover, if your really good job is starting to make you feel edgy and uncomfortable, its only a matter of time. You may take out your frustrations with the indecision on friends, colleagues and loved ones and i'm certain you don't even want to think about that.

Check your work style, sitback and think about things holistically, maybe your persona conflicts with your working conditions and environment, maybe your interests are completely elsewhere (like Nigeria), make sure it's not because your friends have left for Naij that you are feeling this way. Feelings are temporary and can derail our destined path when we take certain actions!

Having said all these, pray even if you don't believe there is a God.

why not work out a plan were you can return to nigeria after a couple of years and stick to it.Dont just come back without a plan and end up furstrated

He makes me lie down in green pastures

He leads me beside still waters

Guy, I think I need to understand the situation better. If you wish to talk, e-mail me and I can call you. I am in London and working from home today. My e-mail is temporarily on my profile.

He restores my soul

Crossroads, why not send a mail to contactus@career-first.org; i'm sure we can help you.

@ Crossroads.Your problem seem more of the adaptability to the life in UK than a job in naija.You are currently employed in the UK and enjoy the status of being a legal (temporary) resident.Maybe you should ask yourself if you are in the right job because there is no guarantee that your employment back home will provide you the happiness you desire.I'm sure you are aware of the factors that will frustrate you although not comparable to the existence in the UK do you think you are prepared for that? However I think you are in constantly in tune with your gut feeling and you come across as someone who is bold and daring.
What I would do in your shoes is: Get as much experience and organise your finances,keep your focus on naija for the next 2-3 years.In the meantime make sure you visit every 4-5months and get yourself updated, embark on findings about your sort of job and familiarise (again) with the territory.Eventually you will be able to make a gradual step back to naija.In all take your time, naija no dey go anywhere,your money no dey go anywhere.Maximise your return on investment in the UK.

the Lord is my Shephard.

He leads me in paths of righteousness

@ Obalende
I feel you

For his names sake

@ Crossroads,

Thanks for starting this thread. I am sure it has opened the eyes of so many people who
always think the grass is greener on the other side.

I was even thinking this is not the same London we adore so much here.

My advice is to follow your heart and also consider the numerous advice you have been
given by all the great people here.

@career1st

I have been hearing so much about your organisation. I never knew it is Mrs. Adesanya
that is the brain behind it. Keep up the great work you are doing Ma'am.

Will appear unto you in church pretty soon.

@crossroads

You get problem no be small o, just kidding anyways

My guy, believe it or not, I personally know you. You were at IC and your name starts with O. You remember king street, in Aberdeen?

Anyways, I'm back in Naija where I expressed personal preference for while you said you wanted to stay back.

I'll get your number from Ir_ _ _ and give you a call. Our talk is not what we can exhaust on nairaland.

Try and have some fun OK, at least in the mean time.

Later

Crossroads:

Other issues are that in fact, I'll be earning about same amount in Nigeria (Oil Company) and with less tax while being able to save and invest more, some peeps are of the opinion that I should remain here for a couple of years, gain experience and return, what is the assurance of this? and most companies look for 5yrs experience and above, does this mean i will leave the next 5 years of my life in misery and confusion with no assurance of the future

I'm praying hard for guidance, Never been through stuff like this, please I'm in deep need for more advice and prayers,
What will be my exit strategy? I'm gettiing deeper into the work and taking on more responsibilities every day,

As you are clearl not happy, in the event that you cannot find a job in an enviroment with more Nigerians/Africans, and you want to come home, i would also suggest that you check the websites of all the oil majors in nigeria, i think i gathered you are an engineer (correct?) if that's the case it's better you come home into a comfortable job witha good company. The reason I say this is that if you have been this unhappy, take the time to plan for a job that will give you equitable pay and make for the frustrating times you have endured, from their websites, Chevron and Shell are actively recruting talented nigerians from abroad and will pay for ticket and shipment of personal effects,


Dont rush back, take the time to plan and seek more information as you are doing now,

im thinking wether its just me freaking out and being cowardly not to face the international environment

You cant hack it boy?

food for thought, it always good to be a big fish in a small river, you get high salary with your international degree and experience everybody call you like the boss or treat you like a king

No wonder most Nigerian business men cant do business outside nigeria

just make sure you plan your exit very well or else you might regret it, have you consider changing jobs or environment

U.K is tough so you have to be tough with it! sorry mate no one to oppress in the UK
naija is about enjoyment even if you work in a high pressure environment you get time to 'oppress'

Welcome back son at least you tried

I shall not want

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death

wowww,

I MUST SAY THAT THIS THE BEST THREAD I HAVE EVER READ IN THIS NAIRALAND

NO NAME CALLINGS

NO SARACASTIC JOKES AND ALL THATS

NIGERIANS, we are really our brothers keepers

WHO SAY SOMETHING GOOD IS NOT FROM THIS COUNTRY??

i wish other will learn from this and i wish nairlanders will take up other peopleS issue and trash it out as this one has been done constructively

to all the posters thanks guys

its a great jobs

@crossroad, think through the suggestions and follow your heart

its your life and itS once, try and enjoy it, money is nothing without happiness and satisfaction
peace to all

Im so proud of everyone that has contributed to this topic, it confirms that we'r all not carried away by the GBP, and still know what's important in life.

I'd like to tell crossroad, sincerely search your heart for what brings you fulfillment (helping others, making money, living comfortably. etc). It will help in your decision making if you'r fair to yourself.

@crossroads,

I'm not sure I know what your career/job is exactly, so I may not be able to profer
solutions to some of your questions

1) You alone can answer this question. What exactly do you want? What are you looking at
achieving? If you set months or years for yourself, will you be able to enjoy those extra
time? Your answer to these will depend on what you really want.

Some years back, I was working at a legal firm, not a high-paying job, and I had it at
the back of my mind that I want to set out to be an entrepreneur. I was using the job to get
acquainted with the computer and after my 8 month there, I felt a burden within me to
leave.

All the extra days afterwards were not palatable for me. Before the end of the month, I
told my boss I want to leave. He was shocked at my decision and so many others were
as well. I left at the set time and since then I've never begged to apply anywhere.

That is 4 years ago, October 2003 to be precise. It wasn't an easy path to follow, but I
have a plan for my life and if I hold on to that job, I may get too comfortable and I know
I will have myself to blame.

So all I am saying is know what you want and follow it. FOLLOW YOUR HEART and be responsible for the consequences

I shall fear no evil

He makes me lie down in still waters.

@ Obalende.
One can't totally agree with your perception of living in the UK.To start with the population of those who made it to the UK through the course of studying can't be compared to those who arrived in order to carve a niche or secure a means of survival and livelihood.Going by that alone,you know very well Nigerians will stick it through whatever pains or treatment they get because majority of them have little or no options.

You are correct there is always some form of migrant degradation in the media and even in the society but I think that is the norm in most parts of the world.Its more like killing the spirit of immigrants by ensuring there lives are made more miserable by the minute.That is a human factor,when a man's territory is continually being populated by aliens he is bound to feel threatened and most likely react by enforcing limits and restrictions.I'm sure you are aware this applies to even the eastern europeans and people from developing countries.But guess what? Nigerians will endure the pain and maltreatment rather than go back to someplace they are worse off.It all depends on where you're coming from.

With regards to the inablity to create a social network outside your own kind,yes there is not much room for integration because we both have different sense of reasoning and it's difficult to enter a caucus if you don't share similar backgrounds.Nevertheless I think people are still happy with the little friends and social circle they belong to.Have you ever wondered why even as Africans we rarely integrate?It is up to you to choose the things that excite and interest you.Your intention to go back home should not be based on that.

The issue of depression,anger,seclusion and there individualtistic nature this is what thrives them as a people.That is an economical factor,it appears the their society is programmed to offer you the finer things but yet bite you so hard.It is true that everybody to his own is a common practice but not in all cases.I've heard about neighbours who knock on your door to introduce themselves or sometimes even offer you home made treats.I'm sure you've met people on the train and engage in random conversations,I'm sure you find oyinbo chicks easier to catch than dudu chicks so on that note one can't conclude that they are so self thinking.

To be reminded you are not one of them should be a reality check that you are actually not one of them.Why would you want to be ? You have enough things to deal with than be chasing to be on the same heritageous status as a descendant of the land.They say in Yoruba "éni ti ó ba wó ojú iyawó l'o mo wipe o'n sún ékún." Keep your head up,do what you have to do,get yours achieve your goals and when it's time to bounce do it with enough swagger.Don't bother yourself about the British lifestyle.I would suggest a mental state of being in a war zone and your whole aim is to win the war and get out.As long as you understand your rights and are able to express them without deterence you have nothing to piss about.
I'm sure you know there are immigrants who have these so called natives as their employees.

In terms of living a happy life,trust me life is what you make of it.There people in worse situations and are still able to live everyday happy.Your mindset is what creates the outlook of what lies in front of you.Don't let nothing strip you of your personality,try to broaden your thoughts and rationalise the reasons why oyinbo people are the way they are.I don't agree the typical British man does not want any association with a black immigrant I consider that as being a one sided story.What makes you think a typical African wants to socialise with an oyinbo man? Its a two way street mate.
Going elsewhere doesn't change much other than the people and perhaps the society it's pretty much the same everywhere.Canada,the states,Australia,Italy,Spain,Germany etc. However you feel your happiness,financial security,self fulfilment can be achieved is what you should be after.

As much as I empathise with us Nigerians,lets not totally condemn the opportunity either given to us or taken by us surviving in foreign lands.On a final note I support your opinion about living in Nigeria it's one of the best desires an immigrant can fathom however this is often not the case when you check out.

All opinions expressed here are not in any way confirmed of based on true facts they are just personal views.

Surely, His goodness and mercy shall follow us, all the days of our lives.

Surely, His goodness and mercy shall follow us, all the days of our lives.

Surely, His goodness and mercy shall follow us, all the days of our lives.