₦airaland Forum

I'm kinda speechless ma'am, i'm a kind of person dat listens to corrections and since you and d9ty7 have the same view about it, i'll try to focus and deliver the best. Tanx ma'am

Flakkydagirl:
I hail the writer and every other person readng this story.


I beg to agree with D9ty7's observations,this story doesn't sound right,neither does it sound real.Hw come the young students re falling in love and crushing.

With the few description of Hadijat,she's quite young and her body shouldn't be much developed.


To make matters worse,you're talking about ur younger bro of 14 having sex,you make it sound like its something right.A boy that should have received the beating of his life at that moment.


Don't forget this is a forum with other young readers and writers,its usually not good to infuse sex and sexual vibes or undertones among teenage students.And everything doesn't have to be able sex or flirtatous tone.


You really have to reconstruct this piece,and flirting is a strong word to use for young students.


That assembly saga was too fictional,nothing real about it and not believable too.

Then Mr Taiwo's action's are brutal,we're talking about a private school here.so how can a teacher act like that unless he has just received an appointment letter from Shell or Chevron.


How come he's reading on a monday morning instead of performing what he's been paid to do.


I'm not trying to kill your work.I'm just saying what I observe,you can do better.Take time to construe your grammers,spacings and passage and a beautiful piece would emerge.