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LiteratureRe: My Gnld Experience (2) by nuatin(op): 12:56pm On Jan 18, 2016
Sorry it took me so long to reply u. I'd not been online for a long time now
LiteratureRe: My Gnld Experience (2) by nuatin(op): 11:22am On Dec 24, 2015
Don't know why the appropiate Nigerian authority had not sanction them
LiteratureMy Gnld Experience (2) by nuatin(op): 1:35am On Dec 24, 2015
“Good morning ladies and gentlemen” one of the usher – a lady finally greeted us.
“Welcome to Virtual Human Resources and Corporate Service, Please bear with us for the delay in the interview as we are about to start now. . .”
The lady that took our print out came out from the door with some paper that looks like question paper. Our attention was now drawn to the lady as she walks over to the usher guy and handed the papers to him gesticulating in a manner that implies that they should start the interview immediately.
The lady that was addressing us; Tolu was her name as she introduced herself earlier told us that the interview is of two sections which are written and oral.
“The written section which is about to start and it will hold for an hour while the oral section will last for 30 minutes, you will start by 10:30am, and stop by 11:30am” she stated as she points to the wall clock that was adjacent to the door where the questions paper came from.
She instructed us to switch off our phone so that there won’t be any distraction during the interview. The usher guy distributed the question papers to us and by the time he had given the last question paper to the applicants, it was about 10:24am.
“Am i in the wrong company?” I thought to myself. The notifications i got from both email and text were from vconsults but am in a hall that belongs to another company that says VHRSC. All these went through my mind as i scanned the hall for any clue. Then i noticed a group portrait that was oppositely facing the hall. In the picture are the team of VHRSC with their names carefully inscribed beneath the portraits according to their position in the picture. Well it seems genuine to me that moment as i strained my eyes to check if i could recognize any of the staffs in the picture that had attended to us so far but i couldn’t discern any of the face in the picture because my sight was beyond my far point from where i sat.
In the hall was another plasma tv but a bigger one compared to one downstairs where the receptionist was stationed, then the usher guy that distributed our questionnaire to we the applicants switched on the plasma tv from the socket on the wall. Their company name “Virtual Human Resources And Corporate Service” popped up on the screen, then Tolu gave us the go ahead to start the first interview section. The questions on the papers were more like an O’ level economics and it stated we should attempt 5 out of the 8 questions – a typical 3 unit course exam in Yabatech. I reminisced as i attempted the first question.
After the hour mark and our question papers were submitted, the man in suit that talked to us earlier downstairs showed up. Tolu then introduced him to us as Mr Lewis as she urged us to applaud him as he walks to the front of the hall.
“Good afternoon great Nigerians” he began jovially.
“My name is Lewis aluko, and i will take you in the second section of the interview which is the oral section” he said.
“The more participative you are, the better chance you have of being selected”.
Lewis further explained that the oral section will be more of interactive session rather than individual evaluation.
The session was full of comedy. You should see how candidates in the hall fumbled during the oral session answering the questions woefully all because they wanted to be employed.
The question Lewis asked during the oral session were the same questions that was presented to us on paper. It was a mere correction exercise as he asked the questions and also gave the right answers to them.
“Mention the factors of production” Lewis read out from the questions paper to us.
I raised my hand just like everyone did.
“Yes you over there” he said, pointing to the lady that was about two seats behind me.
“Land, Labour, Capital and Consumer” the lady answered.
“Nope, not quite” Lewis said unimpressed.
“Yes?” He pointed to another lady.
Clearly, this dude had been chivalrously picking ladies during the interview. Out of eight applicants he called, six were ladies. I couldn’t blame him though when even the guys in the hall made me bow my head in shame as their answers to the questions were quite embarrassing.
Imagine a guy mentioned “Computer” as one of the factors of production which made one of the usher in the hall to burst out in laughter.
“Land, Labour, capital, and entrepreneur” the lady answered.
“Brilliant!” Lewis extolled.
I could only list 3 out of the 4 factors that the lady mentioned during the written test. i wasn’t familiar with entrepreneur. But from the responses of other applicants and correction from Lewis, i knew i didn’t do well in the written test but at least i knew i scored above average as i went through the question paper.
The interactive session went on for more than 30 minutes as stipulated as Lewis then introduced another usher to take over from him -The lady that collected our print out. She introduced herself as Joy, the HR of VHR.
She told us she wasn’t impressed with our response during the interactive session as she observed from the back of the hall.
“I don’t mean to be rude but a graduate saying that examples of a natural resources is manpower makes me want to question both his intelligence and his certificate”
Everyone chuckled in the hall except the guy that she was referring to. I felt for the guy for being the butt of the joke, especially coming from a woman. Her words might sound disrespectful but she was right. She began to bore us with the story of her life, how she graduated from one reputable university and she had worked in three different banks in the past five years but she wasn’t contented as she wanted more out of life.
“Today i can boast of at least two properties in Lagos and one in my native village, thanks to this wonderful opportunity” she said flatulently.
Indeed, she was a good orator as she went on and on for like half an hour. In between her sugar-coated lecture, about three of the job applicants had left the hall while like three to four late applicants replaced them.
Then a lady walks into the hall, Joy paused for a moment as she saw her.
“Everybody say God bless my diamond” Joy shouted.
We the applicants were confused by her sudden outburst but the other staffs in the hall seems to understood her as they also roared in unison.
“God bless my diamond!”
Still confused by the moment of madness, me and the guy sitting beside each other in the hall exchanged looks.
“Are we safe?” He whispered.
“I hope so o” I said.
The lady that walks in happened to be the MD of the company. She has a great height and her slim body made her height prominent. She’s quite pretty and probably in her late 20’s. She smiled and waved at we the applicants as she went through the door where Joy brought the questions paper from which was apparently her office.
“That is the MD of VHRSC” said Joy.
“She earns more than any branch manager of any bank in Nigeria”
My ears twitched by what she said. I bet other applicants in the hall mused in disbelief too. Joy told us she just arrived from Switzerland about three days ago.
A moment ago, she was blowing her trumpet but now she’s exalting her boss. Then Lewis walked to joy and mutteringly said something to her, then Joy turned to us.
“Our MD will like to see all of you now”
Tolu ushered about eight of the first applicants that occupied the front seats in the hall into the MD’s office while we the other applicants waited for our turn.
For more than an hour that i had been in the organization, I’d even forgotten about Vconsult and am already getting along with VHRCS but there was a part of me that was still dubious about the interview.
From the office, we could hear the MD addressing the first sets of the applicants in her office. Three of the applicants came out of the office. The countenance on their faces were dissatisfactory as they left the hall while the other applicants that seem to have being favoured were taken to the back of the hall by one of the usher. Then the rest of us were now summoned into the MD’s office.
The first thing that my eyes caught when we entered the office was the banner that was beside the MD’s desk which has their company logo and a “Win a trip to sun city” was boldly printed on it. The office was well organized and behind the desk where the MD sat was an air conditioner which was switched off but the windows in her office were opened to allow ventilation but not so much of clean air as the window reveals that her office was directly opposite the highways as exhausted fumes from vehicles could be seen diffusing into the air while some find its way into the office through the window.
On her desk were the normal office supplies ; desk blotters, tape dispensers, organizing racks,stapler and pen holders were fastidiously arranged before her, and also on her desk were three plaques and one of the plaques was identical to the Oscars. I was quite amused by the Oscar on her table because the only Africans i know that had the real Oscars are Lupita Nyong’o and Charlize Theron. And i don’t think there is one in this continent, let alone in a suburban area of Lagos.
The MD was busy with her laptop when we entered her office. Her office had only three chairs available and i was the first of the three candidates that sat on them; i sat in the middle. Finally she looked up as she put her laptop aside, she clamped her fingers as she examined each of we the applicants faces. She then smiled.
“Good afternoon greatest Nigerian youths” she finally spoke.
“My name is Catherine Bazuka, by God’s grace the MD of this wonderful establishment, but before i introduce myself further i would like you all to introduce yourself” she said pointing to the lady beside me. The lady introduced herself, telling her the school she graduated from and the state she served, which in turn i did and also the next person beside me till the last applicants in the office. Then Catherine began her own story, it seems all the staff of this company all do have stories to tell but yet to mention what their company is all about. Although, the facilities in the halls and the office made the environ convincing and genuine which are one of the reason i gave them the benefits of the doubt.
Catherine told us that she had been in this organization for three years and she became a millionaire through this company business.
“Yes you heard me, am a millionaire” she affirmed as she saw the doubts on our faces.
“I could have shown you my cheques to you guys as a proof but am being security conscious because i don’t know who is who and i don’t want to be a target of being robbed” she said.
Her reasons for not showing the cheques to we the applicants seems plausible but the six figures she claimed she earns was quite unbelievable.
Well to cut the long story short, i was among the four applicants that did paid for the supposed training fees which was =N=8500.
Of course i didn’t come along with such money, i went to a nearby bank to withdraw from the ATM. I didn’t go alone, Catherine had me followed by one of her staffs. When we returned to their office with the cash, i was surprised by the numbers of people that i met in the hall.
“These are applicants like you that are undergoing training and they are now partners with the company” Lewis explained when i asked.
This business must really be a money-spinner, i thought to myself as i gave the money to Joy and she gave me a form to fill my details and sign which i did, then i was given a bag which contains some magazines and a GNLD supplement. I never knew the content of the bag until i got home that evening.
Believe me or not, i have never heard of GNLD before but i had heard of Multi-level marketing business which i was first introduced to by my roommate back in Akwa Ibom.
I never knew i had signed up for GNLD, i mean a Multi-level marketing that i was naive about. I never realized how much i had been brainwashed until i finally dumped the company about six months later. But before i did left, i had gone through almost all the rudiments that made up the syndicates. It’s an experience i can’t add to my CV. I burned the bridges as i left.
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Literature/Writing AdsMy GNLD Experience (1) by nuatin(op): 12:29pm On Oct 07, 2015
This is how it all started. I received a text from them informing me to come for job interview around ilasamaja.
I was so excited that finally God has answered my prayer after staying at home for like nine months without a job since i came back to Lagos after my NYSC. After applying for multiple jobs online like jobberman, job.naij, career24, you name it. No call or text from any of the companies i forwarded my CVs to.

I'd became anxious as days turned to weeks, months and already approaching a year as i frig around at home. I prayed to my creator that this should be like those time i grew beard at home before i finally got an admission into school.
I told my girlfriend about it as she was equally excited about the good news. she said it calls for celebration but i told her to let me secure the job first before we ordered for any champagne.
"Ok o, na so you go dey talk" she grunted.
"Come on, i don't want to count chicken wey never hatch nah?" I said trying to appease her.
She scoffed but i couldn't be bothered, mine was to get the job first and after that, she can order for all the drinks in the world, enough to drown herself in them if she gets too greedy.

I checked my mail inbox for further details as the text message as stated. But the description of the company's location was not explicitly stated in the mail. I then checked the text message which has a phone number and a reference number.i dialed the phone number and the receiver was a lady and i asked her how can i get to their office. She told me that she will send me a text giving me further description on how to get to their address. I asked her what's the job all about.
"Don't worry, just come for the job assessment and you will know more about it during the seminar" she said. I thought to myself maybe this could be a genuine organization with the kind of mellifluous voice coming from the lady. She could probably be the receptionist in the organization. I'd already imagined the lady must be in money with that kind of American-like accent i heard from the phone. Definitely money is speaking.
I was so excited that i could hardly wait for day to come. which finally arrived. I followed the description as directed by the text message from the lady. But at the back of my mind, i was hoping that this wasn't one of those scam job that people talks about......

About two months earlier before i got this invitation. I'd received a similar text like that telling me to come for a job interview the same day i got the text. I was kind of skeptical about this arrangement because how can they invite someone for a job interview the same day he received the message?. very strange?, well i wasn't prepared at all neither am i going but my dad urged me to go.
That morning i quickly summarized as we use to do in NYSC camp when you're summoned by impromptu to the parade ground.

After spending over five hundred naira to get to the place. I was already discouraged by the distance and the cost alone from getting there. I was hoping the pay should be nothing less than eighty thousand if i get beyond the job assessment. On getting there, i saw a man outside, obviously he is also for the seminar but it seems as if he was about to leave. I asked where the seminar is holding, he directed me upstairs, when i got upstairs i saw two guys and a lady standing at the corridor. One of the guy happened to be the coordinator for the seminar while the other two are candidates that got the notification like me.
" Are you here for the seminar?" The coordinator asked.
"yes" I replied.
He gave me a paper to write my name on it. I took the paper from him and wrote my name and my phone number and the reference number that came with the text as requested on the paper. I saw about twenty names already on the list and i could hear the moderator addressing the candidates inside the hall. After i had filled my info, i hand the list to the other guy; the candidate, if he has written his name. He said he has. I was about to proceed to the hall when he called me back, he told me not to waste my time that they are 419ers and the seminar was a sham. I was disappointed but glad that the he called me back rather than wasting my time to find out. It was obvious that both the guy and the lady at the corridor where in earlier but left the hall.
"One more text, i mean just one more text from this people again and i swear i will wound somebody" He said angrily as he told me this was about the fifth time he has been invited by their organization. He further told me that they had many branches and they use different company name to call people for interview.
"Don't worry bro, it is well.keep the dream alive.. We the youth are really suffering in this country but i know God will save us" The guy said to me with great optimism in his voice.

That was my second invitation from this syndicate. The first was about a year earlier. i couldn't go because i was in Akwa Ibom serving my fatherland.

......When i got to the address of their company, it was a two-storey building with the sign board "Starlink" i was stopped by the gatekeeper as i entered the premises. He asked me what am here for, i told him am here for the job interview and i showed him the text message i received plus the print out of the email as a proof. The gatekeeper showed me the visitor's log book and he obliged me to fill it which i did and he directed me into a hall which was a ground floor.

About five or six job seekers like me were already in the hall sitting and waiting for the job interview. They were about four guys and two ladies. I took a vacant sit beside a lady which i exchanged pleasantries with her. I looked around the hall trying to make out what this company all about. There was no sign,board or anything that is affiliated with the company. "vconsult" was the name that came with both text and the email but i couldn't find any thing of such inside the hall but the hall was exquisitely furnished and it had a chandelier suspended from the top of the ceiling with a plasma TV fixed to the wall opposite the receptionist box. And yes there she was, the receptionist i spoke with on the phone, i thought to myself. No doubt, the receptionist was very pretty as i envisage she would be but the only discrepancy was her accent. She spoke with a typically Ibo accent that suggested she couldn't have been the lady i spoke with on the phone two days earlier but anyway that was not what i came here for. Mine was to focus on the interview to come as i took out my tecno s3 phone, i googled the internet for the company name to check for information about them incase any questions come up about then but the results from the search engines didn't display anything that can tell me about "vconsult". I switched to safer search but still nothing. I then searched for possible interview questions that might come up and i took my time to study them; both the questions and the best possible response one should give if they came up. About thirty minutes passed, still nobody has attended to us. The text and the email says that the interview will hold by 8am but it's about 9:05am already. Two more people joined us and the hall seats was almost occupied. One of the applicants; a guy asked the receptionist if the organization are going to attend to us soon but she gave him a snobbish response as she was more engrossed with her blackberry, taking selfies and also chatting when her phone chimes.

After about an hour, a guy walked in. He was dressed in black suit with a navy blue tie knotted to compliment it. His cologne could be perceived across the hall. The first impression i had about him was that this could be the MD as i assessed his looks. He greeted us as he apologized for the delay,he told us that the interview will hold shortly. He walked over to the receptionist as they both exchanged smiles while he flirtatiously chats with her as she draws her hair back in sex appeal. This time, we the applicants were already getting impatient and a bit piqued as these two lovers fooled around in the hall as if we the applicants doesn't exists

Finally a lady walked in and summoned us upstairs to a smaller hall which has fewer seats and it didn't go round as some applicants where left standing. Inside this hall was a long shelves that hold about eight to ten desktop monitors that are dusty, apparently they seems defunct for years as i assessed the CPU below the shelves. The lady that called us in, probably in her early twenties asked us to tender the printout of the email containing the invitation which we all did. She collected the printouts from us as she brought out an exercise book and gave it to the guy beside me and told him to fill his name and the reference number from the text message and pass it round. After the guy filled the book, he passed it to me which i did in turn passed to the next applicants beside me after i had filled it. When the last applicants had filled the book. The lady collected it and walked towards a door almost near the entrance where we came through. she opened the door and told us to go in which we obeyed like primary school pupils coming from the assembly ground as we marched through the door.
Behind the door was another hall but this time it had a lot of plastic chairs, about twenty of them which are well arranged in rows in from left to right creating a gangway for easy passage. In the hall was a guy and two ladies waiting as they ushered us to take our sit. we the applicants took our seats as the chairs were enough to go round this time. I took my seat at the left side of the wall.
The lady that collected our printout went through another door in the hall with our papers. I'd wondered if we won't go through this door because at that moment i became to have misgivings about this interview.

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