₦airaland Forum

Abandon gini, no I havent, I had to rush this post just because of your comment. Honestly I asked people to hold me to this because I know myself, let's just say interests fluctuate, but I remain committed - Thank you

moauk:
I want to believe you’ve not abandoned this project op.

oludanobi

Still .....

I dont know what Still means but the London boys used to say it so why not, they had a lot of interesting slangs and even though I didnt like it at first, before I knew it I started using some of them

Other interesting things happened in the park , I met a few young boys too , very few of them were bothered about going to university, most of them just wanted to have fun and smoke weed, I remember one trying to sell me weed and I said I didn't want any , he kept pushing , he just didn't understand why I didn't want to buy weed. He was shocked when I told him I don't smoke anything , his response was "you are black and you don't smoke anything", I said "no I don't " , what I meant to say was "you are black and you are this ignorant, come to Lasgidi and see correct weed that will connect you straight to your ancestors " .

A few years later when I started frequenting the clubs, I would be asked by different people if I had weed or some ecstasy to sell - "Why don’t you ask your father if he has weed for you", I wasn’t really annoyed by this, I just found the display of ignorance irritating, most of these people that asked me were white - yep white people wanting to smoke weed and assuming the black guy must be able to hook them up . I digress, back to the park, some of those young people in the park later ended up in jail, a few got killed as well, I remember walking past a woman and thinking she looked familiar : she did because her son has recently been stabbed and I had seen her on the TV being interviewed.

Besides the park I did the regular touristy things, visited McDonalds , Trafalgar Square, River Thames and of course Buckingham Palace - one had to pay respect to the queen. I was disappointed when I got to McDonalds though, the place was super dirty and the burger was small and didn’t even taste great , so this was what those posh boys have been raving about , they didn’t even have correct meat pie ! You always knew I was a JJC because of my jacket, it was a hand me down from my cousin who was bigger and taller than me so the jacket was oversized.

I almost forgot about the water, so in my cousin's house they drank tap water, it was clean and pure but it tasted awful, I know water is supposed to be tasteless but I realized the water in the motherland is sweet, the water in London was very hard and you could taste it, give me Nigerian tap water any day - as long as it is cold and clean.

Even though my cousin had a car, he didn’t drive much, honestly I think the car was more of a liability, you had to pay so much to park and he got tickets a few times, best way to give drivers sense - give them correct fine with no option to bribe anybody, you will be amazed at how people behave when their money is at stake. I liked the transport system, buses and trains were frequent and timely ( most of the time ) so you easily plan your journey.

Still in London

Thinking about why I felt underwhelmed, there must have been some kind of misconception that what makes these countries appealing was something I would instantly see , but a lot of it was more about the processes in place and the people .


My cousin and his wife worked 2 jobs each , they had 3 kids 2 boys and a girl , all under 10 at the time . Chai those kids showed me pepper , I think it was just kids being kids and reacting to a stranger coming into their space and trying to tell them what to do . We became friends eventually , but not after a few knocks and pinches. My being around meant my cousin and his wife could pick up extra shifts since they didn't need to be home as early as they did .It also meant their kids had a new figure of authority they needed to test their rebellion with and rebel they did. I was glad to be of some kind of help , afterall I was eating their food and sleeping in their house for free.

One of the first things I did was to cancel my return ticket , I had a ticket valid for one year and even though I was initially scheduled to return to Lagos 2 weeks later , I thought I'd explore East London a bit more and who knows perhaps I could make some of those cool pounds I had been hearing about. The cool pounds did not come, the under the table job that I was so looking forward to proved elusive.

I started going to the park to while away time, there was a basketball court there as well so I would play a little and also just enjoy the scenery ( some fine fine London girls were part of that scenery too ) , no harm in looking eh. I remember one day when I was enjoying the scenery and these 2 girls waved , that's how I summoned the courage to go and speak to them , in my mind I was a cool guy from the streets of Lasgidi . These girls weren't having it , I ended up messing myself. I learnt another lesson about London girls, they can be very forward and mean at the same time.

I remember following my cousin to his friend's kid's birthday, my people in London find any excuse to party, it was a house party and when we got there it felt more like an adult party, anyways there I was enjoying the scenery and this fine gey came over with her "you look familiar line", I smiled , apparently that line is a global pick up line, I told her it couldn’t have been me in a very friendly voice as I brought out my Nokia 3310, we exchanged names and just as I was about to progress I remembered this little matter of age, you shouldn’t ask a lady their age unless you think that info is crucial , appearances can be deceiving you know. Turns out she was 15, even with all her assets, I just smiled and thought to myself "I waited too long for this visa to allow one girl, whether fine or not take it away" , I put my phone in pocket and said see you in a few years when fraternizing with you will not be a crime.

That’s how my story could have easily changed and my they would say my village people were after me.

Chapter 1 cont'd


My first suprise was how cold it was , yes I knew it would be cold but I just didn't imagine it being that cold , it must have been about 10 Celsius but for a local boy like me , that was extreme. On the drive to my cousin's house I think I'd sum up what I felt as being underwhelmed , I don't know if I somehow overhyped the city in my mind or if it was all the nice stories I heard from the "been tos" . then we got to my cousin's house flat in Plaistow and again I thought , "is this it ? "

They lived in a 2 bedroom flat on the 4th floor of a high rise building , later on I'd find out these buildings were called council flats. Interestingly I didn't feel like I had left the motherland until after I stepped into the flat itself , the furnishing , the smell , the big screen plasma , talk about a stark contrast between the exterior and the interior . The flat felt tiny though , I guess it would considering I lived in a 4 bedroom house in Lagos . In this flat if you do an number 2 , the whole house would know .

I spent the next 2 days indoors , mostly making phone calls putting the word out that I was in the building . I had a few friends from secondary school and uni that had since relocated so we arranged to meet, my cousin also introduced me to some of his friends ,I remember thinking people spent a lot of time on the phone in this country.

So started my long interesting relationship with London

Still Chapter 1

I feel the need to clarify , that I stilled had to fill in an application form and pay the fees and submit the necessary documents , well truly my parent did that, but compared to my other applications where I had planned and strategized, this one felt like a walk in the park. To be honest prior to that I never really thought about travelling anywhere but U.S. Everything about the country just seemed to be way better, I didn’t have any facts to back this up of course.

I cant remember how long after I got my visa that I bought my ticket, but it couldn’t come fast enough. I remember being decked up in my suit that my tailor from Aba sewed for me, the collar of the suit made it look more like a lab coat or rain coat, it definitely did not look like a suit but who cared, I was going to JD and that’s all that counted. The suit thing was my parent's idea. My parent prepped me about the likely questions I could be asked throughout my journey and of course if anyone asked if I planned to work the answer must be NO, you really don’t want to know how many stories I've heard of people being honest at the port of entry and saying "If I see work, I will do it " , erm NO, it's a visiting visa, I will not work .

D day came and I decked up in my coat, first stop was customs or NDLEA, I cant remember now, I had already gone past airport security where you show your passport and all , so this was just a random stop , they asked where my final destination was and I said with a proud smile 'London' , next question was how much travel allowance did I have and when I told them they took to a small room for a search, my travel allowance was inside my socks and when they saw it they wanted their own share. They didn’t accept 5 pounds, they were adamant on 20 otherwise I will be taken for X-ray, I pointed out that I wasn’t carrying any drugs, but that’s not why I was being threatened with X-ray, If I was taken for X-ray I would miss my flight , so I had to part with 20 pounds even before boarding the plane.

I thought I had dodged evil people when earlier one bros approached me in the airport departure lounge and asked if I was travelling, when I confirmed I was, he asked if I will be nice enough to help him take some jewelry abroad. I politely said no, I don’t care if it is jewelry or paper I am not carrying anything for anybody.

The rest of the flight was uneventful, I don’t remember the food, but I remembered being very nervous, I used to have a major phobia for flying, I mean I was always uncomfortable , I wouldn’t be able to sleep, read a novel or even watch a movie. Touch down London Gatwick !! I don’t think I had taken 5 steps from the plane before I got stopped , they wanted to know how I paid for my ticket , these were the early days of international credit card fraud so they were on the look out, I told them I paid with full cash. I got stopped again before I got to the immigration desk , I cant remember what those ones wanted. More questions were asked at the immigration desk

Me - Hello
IO - Hello, passport and landing card please
Me - Handed over docs
IO - What is the purpose of your visit ?
Me- Visiting for 2 weeks
IO - What do you do ?
Me - I am a student
IO - How did you pay for your ticket
Me - My parent paid for it with cash
IO - What does your parent do
Me - Business
IO - What type of business
Me - Getting slightly irritated Standard business
IO - I need more details
Me - I provided more details
IO - Where would you be staying
Me - It's on the card With my family member
IO - Are they resident here ? What do they do
Me - Yes, they are British, they work in security
IO - Enjoy your stay

No that wasn’t enough, they stopped me 1 more time, this time is was customs, they wanted to know if I packed my luggage myself and If I was carrying any prohibited items, No I wasn’t. They proceeded to search my luggage and test for drugs anyways. I think it was the yam flour they saw that made them do a test but hey, it was yam flour. I haven't been stopped that many times since then, that was also the last time a wore a suit for long distance travel. In hindsight I think I called too much attention to myself by wearing that suit, it wasn’t the fact that I was wearing a suit, it was the kind of "suit" I was wearing. Now I just wear a shirt and jeans, anything that makes me comfortable, definitely not a suit.

Back to chapter 1- No vex for the rather long interlude ( Inspiration was missing )-


During my Uni days a good number of my friends also wanted to leave or "Ja" as we used to say , after my first 2 tries I soft peddalled, perhaps it wasn’t my time yet, my knowledge of the application process however grew , so did my contacts , from Oluwole to Alagomeji to Fola Agoro . I didn’t know a lot of people but I knew people that knew people. I became an adviser/ enabler and sometimes I would even follow people to Eleke Crescent. It was the early days of internet penetration in Nigeria so I was one of those guys people came to help them set up email address , advise on application process, how to register to SAT , TOEFL ETC

Boys were just so bent of leaving, but given learning conditions , financial situation, generous strike actions and school closures , you really couldn’t blame them. The background of these people varied, some rich boys , you know the ones with nice rides and designer clothes and some not so rich boys , the ones that already had side hustles and were self sponsoring their education. One lovely December armed with I-20s, passports and all kinds of bank statements , boys just stormed Eleke, many lives changed that month. It was chaotic , consulars got overwhelmed with the crowd, some people got denied without their documents being checked, some just got told come back next year, some got luckly that the consular attended the same school on their I-20 , some got denied on one queue and just joined another queue because the consular did not stamp their passport . It was pure chaos and in the end it just boiled down to luck, how bad you really wanted it and God. I was there as an observer/supporter, interestingly I never had an I-20 in my name. I did have plenty brochures though for all kinds of universities even Ivy league , a boy could dream eh . PS- I didn’t know any girls then

Things got a little quiet after that December, I think that was the final call for anyone in our group who wanted to study abroad as an under graduate, after that we just settled and enjoyed what was left of the undergrad ride before facing NYSC and the big bad wolf that was the Nigerian job market. During my uni days my parent had tried so hard to convince me that undergrad in the motherland was the best for my future, I wonder what was the real reason given they never studied in Nigeria, I suspect lack of funds to support a child's education abroad was a major factor ( God forbid they admit to that ) . There was another stupid strike in my final year and I was able to somehow finally convince my parent it was Visa time.

A few weeks later and voila ! My UK visa arrived, 6 months, single entry visiting visa and of course 'No recourse to public funds', I could sensationalize this by saying I hustled , I struggled , I payed this person or was on the queue for so long or had to call for hours to book an appointment but honestly I didn’t do anything , well I think I was beaten by the rain on the day I went to take my passport photograph if that counts - my parent just got back that night and handed my passport and said congratulations.

I know !!

Chuky7:
How is the Oracle certificate gotten?...

I did my training through one of the Indian owned IT schools then , I wouldn't say it benefited me in anyways , the course was expensive and Oracle jobs even though highly rated were very scarce . There are a lot of highly sought and valuable professional certifications out there now , it all depends on your field and interests.

Interviews cont'd


After about 21 months I started looking for a higher role , I had learnt so much and delivered so much in my role that I believed I could excel in a more senior role , the only way to get promoted was to actually apply for the roles .


Senior roles were a bit more thorough, you had to apply with a CV and Cover letter ( well tailored o and not just generic) , some had presentations / exercise and then competency based questions . Competency based was usually in the format of "Tell me about a time when you have demonstrated excellent leadership skills ?" , the expectation is that you have examples that are aligned with the companies values and skills required for the role . I usually answered these questions using the STAR approach

Situation , Task , Action , Result

In preparation I would write all the possible questions down and the answers . Then I would refine my answers to make them more powerful. Some UK organisations have interview packs so each set of questions is aligned to one or more of the companies values and the had a list of indicators used for scoring.

OK I am starting to feel this is boring

My first application for a senior role was to manage a technical team , this one was thorough, technical ( white board style) and then some competency based interview questions. A week later an external candidate was employed for the role and we secretly wished he would fail , he didn't , he actually became my manager .

M had since moved to another team and was now on the same grade as MM, there was an opening in his department which reported into another manager and M encouraged me to apply. This was my 3rd attempt and some self doubt was starting to creep in. Someone had warned me that the hiring for this role was crazy manager was a super smart but crazy woman . I didn't mind crazy. I called her to have a quick chat about the role before putting my application in, I think a part of me also wanted to gauge her craziness. I didnt notice any red flags so I went ahead.

I didn't get asked any technical questions , the first question was to talk about my career so far , they had read my CV and wanted to discuss a few things that piqued their interest . My CV was one of those that had some powerful figures on what I delivered and this made people curious and in some instances doubtful . I stopped lying on my CV after the SQL saga , plus this was an internal application so they could have easily verified . Other key questions were - Most impressive achievement and why do you think you are right for this role .

MM had helped me with my interview prep , the question of having no experience in managing teams came up in my 2 prior interviews and MM advised me to mention it before they even asked , so when they asked why I thought I was right for the role , I made sure I called out the elephant in the room .

I must have said something like " I know I haven't managed a team before but I have learnt from good managers on what to do and what not to do and I think one important thing is to manage the team the way I want to be managed , I will no doubt make mistakes but I will work hard and learn from my mistakes." , I didn't start my answer with that but I think I slotted it towards the end , I think they were pleased with my response.

I got a call from the hiring manager a week later saying she needed more time to make the decision , M said he would put in a word for me but he couldn't be overly pushy about it since he had only been in the team for 2 months and didn't really know the hiring manager ( plus she was crazy). The following week she called me to offer me the role and I was so excited, I accepted the minimum salary for the grade . I tried to go back to ask for more but she won't budge. Later I would find out the process got narrowed down to me and an external candidate who had a lot of managerial experience.

First task was to put a team together , that's how I went from interviewee to interviewer .

TheArchangel:
Your thread has helped me with many life lessons

[quote][/quote]glad you found it useful . Thank you !

Interviews cont'd -

Some of my UK jobs didn't necessarily require an interview, the security job, cleaning job and factory jobs only required registering at the agency , they usually give you basic math and english test which only stark illiterates struggle with .

Ah I remember my job selling paint ball tickets on the high street , the owner of the company was a young black guy , he interviewed me at Burger King / McDonalds, I don't remember the interview properly but I remember the foolish guy saying I should try to dress properly when coming to work , apparently the trouser my tailor at Tejuosho market sewed for me and a £5 shirt from one of the open markets in London wasn't a good enough combination . I only did the job for 1 day , that's 7 hours of standing in the middle of the high street trying to sell stuff . Imagine standing on Ojuelegba road and shouting " Anyone for paint balling " , only difference was it was a little cold ( it was summer so it wasn't too bad ) , still it was commission based and for the 7 hours of hard work I only got £10 because I was only able to sell 1 ticket , take away the £5 for the shirt and the £4 I spent on lunch and the £3 for transportation and well I just wasted my time really.

I had applied for this graduate Analyst job in a city far away , I applied for soo many jobs I lost count , a lot of those applications just resulted in the standard "We are sorry you have not been successful", sorry for your papa !
Anyways I got an invitation for an interview but I had to fly , that's £130 to attend the assessment center , broke immigrant like me . I emailed them to ask about reimbursement but unfortunately the contact I emailed was on leave so I didn't get a response. Eventually I decided to risk it all and attend - when you apply for hundreds of jobs and only get invited to a handful of interviews you can't really afford to be choosy . It was 3 stages , online assessment , presentation and interview .

I remember my stomach rumbling during the interview and I had to make a joke about it because I had not eaten , I got interviewed by 2 guys and they seemed really cool , they asked me about my MSc project and I try to summarize in lay man terms , then they asked if I knew Proc SQL - This SQL again ! I said I knew SQL but not Proc SQL , I didn't lie o , in case they gave me paper and pencil again . They also asked if I knew anything about Pay as You Go meters and we'll luckily for me , my mom's shop in Lagos had a prepayment meter so I just said - of course . The guys took me round the office , showed me the pool table and all , it was one of those interviews where you bond with the interviewers . I left feeling positive about it.

A week later I started getting anxious , I was travelling to Naija in a few weeks to get married in Osun , getting this job will really REALLY help . I got a call from one of the interviewers about 2 weeks later saying they were still considering me for the role. These were the Blackberry days ! One sunny afternoon in Naija I got an email from one of the interviewers asking me to call them, I quickly called the number in the email and the conversation went something like "I wanted to check if you were still interested in working for us … " of course I was interested. Most of the time in UK you get a phone call before you get sent an offer. During my first week of training , my trainer said "so you are the one that got the job my son applied for " , now imagine what was going through my mind when I heard that - black me, vs the son of someone who had spent over 20 years in the organization, the son had even worked as an Analyst for one of big computer manufacturers. I couldn’t believe it, that definitely couldn’t have happened in my fatherland , before that day I was team " They wont hire us because we are black" my perspective changed going forward, yes some people will not hire you because you are black but go in and put in your best, leave the rest for God. I would speak to the guys that hired me about this years, one was the manager(M) and the other the manager's manager(MM). When I spoke to MM about my surprise when I found out what I was up against , he said "We couldn’t have hired him, that's nepotism" and I had new found respect for him. M said he struggled with the decision and was leaning towards choosing me, he even had a conversation with his wife about wanting to take a chance on me and hoping I will be a good fit. In the end M made the decision because "It was the right thing to do", this remains one of my guiding principles till date. I made sure they didn’t regret hiring me , I don’t think I had ever worked so hard in my life, I even came to work during the weekends, anything to get the job done! M and MM remain my good friends till date.

Apologies for any typos, I had to rush to get this one out.

Chapter X - Interviews

I only attended 2 interviews in Nigeria , one of them was a connect via my dad who referred me to another friend , the man made me travel all the way to his office for a 3 min chat and formed that he was busy . I don't remember the details , only that he shouted at me when I called for a follow up . Needless to say I didn't get that job.

The second one was with a bank, I remember writing the entrance test and leaving when I had enough , there must have been thousands of us and man the exam was hard and the room was super hot , so I did what I could and just left , I felt sorry for some people that wore suit to take the exam , why ?? The person marking the exam doesn't care what you were wearing . My pride didn’t let me use my connects this time , I didn't tell anyone that I applied until after the interview . I hope but doubt that the recruitment process has improved since then. I mean to get selected to come and write test sef was a chore , you had to count your blessings for each stage you scaled through and don't even get me started with all those foolish companies that call you for 7 stages , I mean WTF do you need me to explain to you 7 times! Am I applying to be the president.

There must have been at least 150 of us that attended this interview , we must have all arrived around 9 or 10 in the morning and I didn't finish until after 7 , I remember it was after 7 because I was fasting on that day and didn't break until I left . Most of that time was spent just waiting . Around 5pm I got called in with a group of about 7 others to discuss how to solve the problem of unrest in the Niger Delta . Come and see people blowing grammar , this was my first experience with overambitious candidates , you know those that automatically assume everyone else came to watch them speak . I had to really raise my voice in order to be heard . I remember someone saying the people of Niger Delta needed reorientation ( in his mind he was blowing grammar), I pointed out that these people were happy fishing and enjoying their lives before our ogas decided to extract oil , destroy their means of livelihood without giving them an alternative and then brazenly use all the proceeds to build Abuja , reorientation my foot ! I want to believe I got a few points in , then they sent all of us out and called us one by one for face to face. One of the other candidates said he ran into one of the interviewers in front of the toilet and the guy said - "You are X , you finished with a 1st in Economics abi, I studied Economics too , I'm ready for you " . I think that shook my guy a bit. A lot of the other candidates had MSc, fair to say 90% of the people there were smart ( if you could pass that exam you are book smart ) .

The first question I got asked was "What is Statistics ?" followed by "What is data ? " then "What is information ?", I studied Mathematics and Statistics for 5 years and that is the best they could ask me , really ? They asked me about my work experience and I told them I had worked in London answering calls so I had customer service experience , I quickly regretted it because one of the interviewers pointed out it wasn't real customer service since it was on the phone. Who asked me to mention London sef , all that did was get me perceived as proud. They asked me where I wanted to be in 5 years and when I mentioned that I wanted to be CFA certified they asked me what CFA was ? Apparently they hadn't heard of it , but god forbid they didn't know about what this boy from London was talking about . They looked me in the eye and said I was lying , I tried to explained that I had researched CIMA, ACCA and all but they weren't having it. This was in 2007 and as I said in a previous post , I did a lot of research scouring through jobsites for high paying jobs so I could plan my career , I also had some guidance from a young accountant then ( he is probably a chairman in his country now ) . Anyways their response was "You think you can just come here and bamboozle us ".

After I finished the interview , I activated my connects, I had done my part.

I am purposely not drawing any conclusions about interviewing in Nigeria, I only did 2 so I feel I don’t have enough experience , feel free to share yours .

One of my first interviews in UK was with Three for a call center job, simple application process online and the first stage was a telephone interview . It was mostly scenario based questions . One of them was "Tell me about a time when you displayed exceptional customer service ", my imagination ran wild and I told them about being very patient with a deaf and dumb customer so that I could communicate with him and meet his needs . In my mind I killed the interview , now I am thinking " What a foolish response , any sensible person would have known that's a lie ", needless to say I didn’t get past that stage. Interesting thing about most UK interviews is that people would hardly call you out when you are lying . Many years later I would interview a guy that claimed to single handedly deploy SAP , yes that's what he said and I asked him if he meant part of a team and my guy kept on saying he did it all by himself , my colleague and I didn't even bother thinking about him for the role .

One UK interview that I always comes to mind was for a Software Tester role that was paying 27k GBP/annum, this was pre 2010 so that was cool money, actually it is still not a bad starting salary for graduates now. As I sat in the reception lobby a fellow black brother saw me and tried to give me expo, told me about DNS and asked if I knew SQL. I had been reading on W3school. My interviewer was a friendly white guy, he asked me about DNS and what I had found most challenging in my career, I honestly said Calculus and we had a chat about that. Then the SQL came, he gave me paper and pencil, described tables to me and asked how I would select from 1 table, I wrote the query so he decided to give me another one, this time around he asked me to select from 2 tables. I knew I dint know that one, I was hoping they wouldn’t ask me about 2 tables because I struggled with it when I studied it the day before, anyways I went ahead and wrote down some gibberish , my guy looked at it and said "Interesting, I haven't seen this method before , I'll have to try it out".

The recruiting agent called me the next day to give me some feed back, they really liked me and were impressed with most of my responses, in the end they were disappointed that I was too adamant to admit that I didn’t know how to join 2 tables , the way they saw it they were looking for someone who wasn’t afraid to ask for help when needed. All I had to do was simply say "I don’t know " . Someone had told me before to never say I don’t know during an interview, I quickly filed that into the foolish advise section of my memory. This one still pains me till today.

I'll have to split this one into multiple posts, more on UK interviews and US interviews later.

topedoski:
I am currently a student in Ahmadu Bello University Zaria. I applied for Computer Science but I was offered Statistics. I had no other options than to go for it. I have been at home with no admission for 3 years and my junior brother would also be writing Jamb next year, so you see?

Well I discovered that I haven't really think about the course Statistics because I have always dreamt of being a computer scientist, I even learnt how to code while at home. But this statistics is like a new world to me. I want to know what and what I will be facing as a statistician, what kind of career field are available or open for someone who read statistics.

I was in your shoes many years ago , I wanted to study Chemical Engineering but alas I got offered Maths and Stats , I soo did not want to do that course , I felt ashamed when people asked me what I was studying . I half heartedly studied it .

A degree in stats gives you the foundation for becoming a programmer , data analyst , data scientist , financial analyst, statistician , educator etc

I think what is more important is what additional skills you acquire on top of that foundation , what tools you learn to use and how you apply it .

My story - After I finished my Stats degree, I got Oracle certified , started worked in a bank for 2 years then left Nigeria to get an MSc in IT. I have worked in predominantly data roles since then and I can tell you it is rewarding , but like everything else you MUST put in the work . All the best !

Diary mode : London, Liverpool st - 2019

I decided to chat with the young Security Guard at the office today , we have been giving ourselves the "nod" since I started but I was curious to know his story. He didn’t sound like an immigrant , he is definitely British, so why is he doing this job? He sounds educated and very polite, I wonder if the older Ghanian Security Guard is his uncle and hooked him up with the job. Let's call him Young G.

I spoke to the older man too, he asked me where I was from and when I said Nigeria, he had this knowing smile and said he wasn’t surprised. A curious me asked why he wasn’t surprised and he went on to talk about how Nigerians were very ambitious and always strived to be better. He spoke about how a lot of the Nigerians that they started together many years ago were well off now. Again I asked nicely what happened to him, his response "Well a combination of things, pressure to quickly settle down from home, then pressure to build back home and before you know it, you have kids and your priorities shift and then you are stuck". I could see the regret in his eyes, I respectfully said it's never too late. We'll call him …. Old G. I didn’t register my disapproval of building back home when you have no plans to return there and you are still renting a small apartment in London. I also didn’t tell him that a lot of Nigerians were stuck too, some people move and some people don’t.

He told me he has was an Msc in Entrepreneurship student, he graduated with a 2:1 Bsc and decided to immediately enroll for his Masters and has not been able to secure a job, when I asked what he really wants to do, he said he wanted to be an entrepreneur because he liked networking. I asked if he would like for me to review his CV and he gladly agreed and sent it over. His CV was very basic so I politely made some recommendations and asked him to update and send it back to me .

Current day :

As I write this I still haven't received an updated CV from Young G, I sent him a text about 7 months later and he was still looking for work, I feel his struggle, it's slightly different for a black person in London, even though there are a lot of black people in London, most black people you see in corporate London are securing the building or cleaning it, no shame in that though, I have done both but again perhaps I got lucky. People like Young G didn’t have anyone to support them to get into the corporate world, I mean we worked in a bank so how come no one even bothered to give him a shot at an interview with his 2:1 in Accounting . I don’t want to say Young G is lazy but all I asked him to do was update the CV and send it to me , maybe he was just tired or maybe he didn’t understand why I was interested. I was interested because I was tired of being one of the 2 percent of blacks in the corporate world, in most meeting rooms I was the only black person. It is important to me that I contribute to changing those statistics and changing that narrative.

I wonder why Young G decided to go for an Msc straight after his undergrad, I mean he didn’t stay home for 3 months, it's not like he needed the Masters as a means to live in the country , he was born British for god's sake! Perhaps it was pressure from his immigrant parents, the same pressure that made him take the security job, the misconception that it is better to be doing something than stay home doing nothing. In my opinion staying home to research and improve your chances of landing a dream job is way better than starting a job you could be stuck in. Young G wasn’t even good at networking, he was polite but shy, he just liked the idea of it and he let himself get swept up by the entrepreneur buzz. We worked in a building that had at least 8 companies, surely someone good in networking would have networked with someone who would at least get him an interview.

I am still very angry at the murder of George Floyd and how black people are being treated, but of course I choose to write about what we can do to change that narrative. It is important that every black person in a position to help a fellow black does so, sometimes it's not even about money, it's sharing advice , listening and sometimes mentoring. Apathy is not an option and being complacent like Old G is not an option either. Please lend a helping hand !

PS : 90% of black people I have met in the corporate world are indeed Nigerians, It could just be me or Old G could be right, either way I remain proudly Nigerian but I am under no illusions that we are smarter than others, we are just uniquely different !

Mancala:
Firing is just the first step, I hope. They will most likely face criminal charges (likely both state and federal), and after that civil damages law suits. If they are convicted, they will likely face persecution from the prison population during their entire stay and may have to be in solitary. The system works great when it does, but this nonsense has got to stop.

I soo want to believe you , but history says otherwise , still we must hope .

What do you want for yourself and what is the plan ? It seems like a simple enough question but it is really important. I find if you have no idea what you want to do it becomes easier for people to push you about. Your dad is right it was really difficult during his time but we have since made progress , an MSc in the UK would get you a post study visa , it's valid for 2 years which gives you the opportunity to get a job and some experience. Note that it is not a walk in the park to get a job o and as someone said here you could end up being a security guard after your Masters. I remember a friend of mine making fun of me when I got my first office job in the UK , he was making more than me in the care sector . I stopped talking to him , in a few years I was making in 1 day what he was making in a month , he is still in the care sector ( no disrespect to care workers or security guards ). Maybe I just got lucky , you could be lucky too but you will work for it o.

Networking is a not a bad career path , use your time in Naija to get certified and learn as much as possible , if that 2k a month job gives you the right experience please go for it .

In summary please have a plan , do your research and put your work where your mind is �

LogTM:
This is very sensitive post. Full of a lot of emotions. One that I can't really relate with, but I can at least get a sense of what you mean through the tone of your writing.

Thank you ! For your old and new response , I was going to reply to the old one but then I got carried away. I must say I haven't mastered the art of coping with "Otherism" , I am still learning , each scenario still shocks and stops me in my tracks , I made up my mind to always react because I shouldn't be responsible for people's ignorance . I wonder if it is innate though , we find ourselves on either side of the coin and the story changes and we quickly forget , why are we quick to point out how people are different from us and automatically infer that the difference we see makes them less . Over the years I have learnt to pay attention to people's values , I am less bothered about if people look or sound like me or even if they love the same sex as me , I am more interested in what they value most .

Sadly on the same they we posted another ignorant American knelt down on George Floyd's neck and just forgot his knee there until he died, that happened in a country I chose to live because I believed it is better than the motherland, my kids look like George Floyd and this is 2020.

PS- I liked your old response better but I guess you may not have the luxury of anonymity like I do

I wouldn't trade my years in Nigeria for anything , you could say I am proudly Nigerian , not necessarily of the entity that is Nigeria but for how it shaped me. Somehow I am glad my first visa application as a teenager was denied , I think I would not have fully understood the struggle that makes one grounded. I learnt many things after in my late teens into my late twenties and undergraduate life in Nigeria gave me another degree, from the School of Hard Knocks.

I am thankful I don’t carry the burden of growing up as a minority, I worry about the impact that has on black kids and if it is a fair price to pay as I convince myself that my kids are better off outside Nigeria than in it. It is a multifaceted burden, at first they get taught about a lot of history and traditions that is not theirs and if they would be taught anything about people like them, it is usually a skewed, massively played down version of history that briefly mentions slavery and lays emphasis on how that was a different era as if to make it acceptable. There is also the gradual realization that a lot of people do not look like them and that people treat them differently and expect them to behave differently. The one that breaks my heart the most is when these kids start to grow up and finally go to the motherland , the cultural shock and how they are treated comes with the rude awakening - they don’t really belong there either.
The result of this is a sense of loss, anger and a complex. I am thankful I didn’t grow up a minority , it makes me somewhat unaware of my difference in a white man's world and I don’t have Imposter's Syndrome whenever I am in a room full of people that don’t look like me. I stand everywhere, yes some people would try me and even question why I am where I am but that’s not my problem, it's theirs.

The beauty of dealing with setbacks is that it makes us resilient and to navigate this world we definitely need a healthy reserve of it. Chai! I have had my own fair share of setbacks o, from my first heartbreak to my first D, E or F, to not getting a job I really wanted and worst of all to the loss of a friend or a loved one. Some of these events knocked me flat out, but still I managed to stand and keep moving, it helps put things in perspective when challenges come as they do and will continue to, I am able to cope because I have been through worse. I am careful not to say I am strong or that people who cannot cope are weak, I just think certain experiences better prepares you for dealing with adversities. I am one of the lucky ones, lucky enough not to be consumed by those adversities and lucky enough to see them as tools that help me cope with future challenges.

There is an interesting school of thought that says Naija no dey carry last, and that if you survived in Nigeria you can make it anywhere else. It suggests that we are super smart beings and more intelligent than most, as if our gods have blessed us with abilities in abundance. While I don’t believe this is true or think there is any scientific evidence behind it, it is a good confidence booster. The feeling of "I be Naija now" and as a result I am infallible. A lot of us feel that, but it must be controlled so we don’t come across as arrogant, there is a very thin line between confidence and arrogance.

I think of these as the Nigerian gift, without which my journey will definitely have been different. I remain proud of my roots and who knows, I may return one day, not just yet though.

stonemasonn:
Omo it's getting scary o! So what's the next best move??

Only if I knew , I like Mancala's advice though. I am also trying to anticipate what most people would need in the short term and long term and position myself to meet some of those needs.

Another wave of recession is here , many would be affected , very few will benefit from it. This is me thinking out loud , what's the next best move , some people are already buying shares , others think prices will continue to fall. Come rain , come sunshine we remain positive and hopeful.

After round 2 I took a pause from any applications , I just got on with university and all. In my second year I realized some of my classmates weren't writing exams so a curious me asked , turns out they didn't need to because all they needed to do was pay for "tutorials", what an easy way to pass eh. Yes I joined them , not that I needed to , these were guys that sat near me in exams so they could copy me. It seemed like an easier option , so an averagely serious me became even less serious.

I could tell you I used some of the time freed up chasing girls or partying but I didn't , I just did nothing really , well there was a lot of thinking . I also tried cheating for the first time in my second year , then I got caught by someone who had taught me in computer school. She was pissed , I think her being disappointed got to me , again I didnt need to , part of the exam was basic programming that I had learnt when I was 10 , plus I learnt it again in computer school , but everybody had the questions before the exams .

There is something about a system that enables corruption, people would always choose that option especially when there are no consequences , the phrase goes "work smart" . I didn't get penalised or anything , she just wanted to make an example and she begged the senior lecturer on my behalf , she couldn't believe it though , I used to be one of her best students. I was in the top 10 best students in my class , it could be because I am smart or it could be because there weren't a lot of smart people in my class or maybe they had other things going on .

In hindsight I should have stayed in my lane , I would have passed those 4 courses with a little reading but I didn't want to be there and couldn't care less. Corruption in different shades would always present itself , it's not an excuse to say the system enables it , even though it those. One way another I have contributed to corruption , of course not participating wouldn't have stopped anything but at least I would have been able to say I never cheated now all I can say is I didn't need to cheat .

Round 2

I don't remember my second interview as vividly as the first, but I remember I laughed when I saw a lady hawking a book on how to get an American visa, she didn't find the whole thing as funny as I did.

This time we went as a family , one of my parents and my younger ones , another stupid boy interviewed us , well more like he interviewed me alone , he wanted to understand why the parent had been travelling without the kids, he wasn't convinced with the parent's explanation so he just called me up and asked me JAMB questions.

Then he made his decision , he granted the parent a visa and refused us kids , now you know why I said he was a stupid boy, I mean who does that , person don suffer o .

I think I was in my first year of university then , we had all documents that showed ties to Nigeria and enough money in the account , it just boiled down to the Consular Officer's gut. I feel somewhat responsible for not giving a very smart answer to a dumb question like - "Why haven't you been travelling with your parent ?" , I should have said something smart like - "We are patriotic citizens and did not want our moral values shifted by your capitalist country , now we feel well grounded and unshakeable so we are ready to explore " . Oh well no use crying over spilt milk, we live to fight another day .

In hindsight I don't think there is anything I could have done , perhaps the parents could have taken us on earlier trips but it just wasn't priority for them. I did however learn that sometimes we could get too busy making money that we forget to enjoy it .

Hope everyone is keeping safe , with most countries starting to ease down the lockdown process and a lot of leaders showing poor judgement or the total lack of it , the onus is on us all to make sensible decisions about going out or not.

2law:
oludanobi I must really commend your write up
Following you closely.
Just can't wait to position myself immediately after my degree program here in Nigeria to leave to one of the western block.

Please I need answers here to know which skill is selling out there.
Have got less than a year and few months to finish my degree program and am desperately in need of a skill I could learn here in Nigeria to help me position myself out there.

Am an educationist in the making.

I try to avoid telling people what to do, I'd rather tell you what I'll do or what I did.

Key questions for me when it came to career choices is

1. What is the most important thing right now ? Money, fulfillment, impact. It will be nice to get find something that has all of these but it is easier to focus on 1. Mine was money at the time so I would visit the different job sites and just filter based on money. Site examples below -

Jobserve.com - Global
Indeed.com - Global
Jobsite.co.uk - UK
Monster.com - US
Dice.com - US

2. What skills, knowledge and experience do I have that I can leverage on - This means your dont have to start from scratch unless it is absolutely necessary.

3. What skills/job are in the highest demand - You can just google this for your particular country of interest ,there are many articles online about this written yearly. Different countries also have an occupation shortage list where people with those skills can apply for visas.

Right now I know there is a demand for Nurses, Doctors, Data Scientists, Data Analysts, Programmers, Teachers, Cyber Security Engineers, this however is limited to my area of interest.

I think it is a smart move to learn skills from Nigeria if you can, on one of my trips to Nigeria I enrolled in a PHP programming course, really good value for money and I was the only student so the guy had my time. I also tried to learn to paint cars.

Hope this helps.

OK , I am jumping to chapter 10.

Diary Mode - 2011

Today James called me a nigger at work, he stood right there across the table from me when no one else was there and said it.  I couldn't believe it. I felt a new kind of confusion that made me silent for a few seconds which felt like forever. I had to ask him - "what did you just say ?", he said - "I said what's up my nigger" and he had a mischievous look on his face, but his voice had started to shake , like he was scared . James is one of my office friends , we are in the same team and most importantly  he is white , surely he must know that this is a big no no . More silence, I felt many things at once , I felt ashamed , I was shocked and confused , interestingly I wasn't angry but I was upset, it felt like I was being bullied. I looked at him calmly and I said - "Is that you trying to be all gangster ? You don't ever get to say that to me .  If  you had  said that in front other black people , I would have been forced to deck you". James is crazy and I think part of him was testing me , now a few hours later I am still upset and now I am angry , angry that I wasn't angry when he said it to me , angry that I somehow betrayed my people by letting him say it without decking him

Reflection Mode - Current day

Yes, that happened , right in the office , it was just the 2 of us , perhaps others hadn't gotten to work at the time , interestingly it wasn't the first time I received a racially motivated insult and it wasn't the first time I was called a nigger . It however was the first time I was called a nigger by a white person. I was upset for days.

Growing up loving rap music, my friends and I would always call ourselves N this , N that, our rap idols said it so it must be cool. It was different when I was called that by a white person though , there was just something unacceptable about it . Actually everything about it was unacceptable. I think that incident changed something in me, it forced me to take words literally. I don't care if black people have embraced the world as a coping mechanism , it doesn't change the fact that the word itself is derogatory.

It's interesting how you don't really notice discrimination when you are in the majority, in Nigeria everyone looked like me and I interacted in circles where my kind was a majority. I lacked the preparation and instant anger that my "innit" brethren had, their own tolerance of any nonsense from white people was 0.

I was forced to confront some of my own biases too , I started challenging my friends when they called me nigger , if it wasn't acceptable for my white friend James , then it wasn't acceptable for anyone, period. I also made a conscious effort to stop using derogatory terms like  paki, chinko, I even stopped the friendly insult of calling my friends aboki.

I did have other racially motivated incidents both inside and outside work , but I had learnt to assess each situation and deal with it as I deemed fit .On a bus in a strange town with 2 drunkards I would leave it alone, it isn't worth risking my life to prove a point. In the office I would sit down calmly and look the person in the eye and ask them WTF was going on , politely of course in a language that was acceptable. It's interesting watching people shake when shit gets real. One thing I never do is to take it home and dwell over it , that just messes with your mind and honestly it isn't worth it . I never reported anyone though, I didn't want to be the black guy that got a white guy fired. I didn't pull the race card or anything like that but the message was clear, don't come for me or I'll come for you.

James is still my friend , I would go ahead and become a new manager in another team and tried to get him to work for me , he would decline only to come and work for me years after, when I had proven myself as a manager. He became part of the dream team I led. No grudges held , we just kept it moving , he may be crazy but he is a good guy and he is smart and hard-working. He never called me a nigger again, If he did , I would have decked him and then gotten the both of fired.

If I may digress , I noticed one of the Nairaland rules of posting saying something about perfect spelling and grammar - I think that's unfair given the state of our schools and the high level of illiteracy. It shouldn't be a rule since it's not achievable . Maybe I am writing this because I noticed some typos in my last post as well - I did say the rule was not achievable plus I also said anything goes . No this is not the post of the day .

I'll respond to Macana as my post for the day , lazy eh , I know.

I have been outside Nigeria for 12 years so I am still a small boy in this game , I spent those years in England , Scotland and the US. One of the other "Dreams" I had was to live in all the continents of the world and then write a book about the different cultures and similarities, ( this is me practicing for the book ) or maybe this is the book . I like to dream eh - it's free and it keeps me moving.

I have shelved that dream by they way, I think 3 continents will have to do, I underestimated how attached I would get to certain places and frankly moving is stressful. There have been tempting interests from Dubai though , but certain things about that zone don't sit well with my values or maybe the money isn't right yet. I shudder to think of how my wife would reach to us moving again.

I haven't been to Nigeria since 2016, prior to I visited at least once every 2 years, it got emotionally exhausting though, things and people just appeared to get worse on each visit.Now I am visiting other places.

I worry people may have more questions , too many questions can take the fun away ,while I am happy to answer any questions based on my experience , it may mean I have to jump to chapter 20 when I haven't finished chapter 1 yet. Part of the fun is being anonymous, so I may not answer any questions that could compromise that.

As we used to say - I remain loyal

My people , some of you are vexing already , please no vex , let's focus on enjoying the thread . Let us respect and address others the way we want to be addressed . Thank you !


Since there already is an ongoing connversation about why someone left or why they came back , I'll write on that even though I didn't plan to until later .

The drive to leave and the reasons differs , actually it felt more like being pushed out. Pushed out because it is not a choice many would have ordinarily made. Exciting as idea of 'the abroad' is , leaving friends, family and life as you know it can be somewhat daunting. For some it comes with a huge wave of depression during your first month (watch out for that one).

Poverty is merciless bastard though , it can turn a make a smart person look like a fool and make people do unthinkable things. I remember a conversation with my course mate then , he had applied for a few visas unsuccessfully and was about to try one more time , if that failed he planned to go the long route . He already had his journey mapped , Nigeria to Cameroun , all the way to Libya and then crossing the Mediterranean sea into Italy. I laughed at him and told him that was a foolish idea . Sometimes you can't understand people's decisions or rationales unless you've walked in their shoes. Thankfully he didn't have to , if this has crossed your mind or you are contemplating it , PLEASE DONT , IT IS SUICIDE !

I found Nigeria confusing , all the morals that were engrained in us with serious beating and frog jumps gradually became less important as we entered our late teens.Teachers helping us cheat , touching the fine girls amongst us , lecturers selling hand out , religious leaders not practicing what they preached . I mean why teach me about honesty and integrity only to introduce 'sharpness ' many years later , I could have just spent all those years preparing to be sharp. I mean the end justified the means - all the time.

Like many people I have many weird and wonderful examples ( a few posts on that in the future ) , in the end I just strongly felt there had to be an alternative and that is what I sought . I remember having multiple conversations with friends and family and some would say "You could have been X by now if you stayed " , truth is they were no guarantees and all a man wanted was some peace of mind and sanity .


The flip side to this is the longing , after you achieve all that it is that you were after in the first place , you start to miss the motherland , very little things start to get to you , all the discrimination you endured before starts to feel utterly and unacceptable because in the end there is no place like home Home however is wherever you make it .

It has been a few days , longer than I stated at the start of the post( thank you for holding me to account , no vex). Like most people I went into a hole of worrying , you know those rabbit holes where you start from one problem and then before you know it you are at 99 .

These are all what ifs o, interesting how the mind works eh, I totally forgot about all the things I needed to be thankful for , so the moto changed -

If we must fail , let it be because we exhausted all possible options, if we must fail let it never be for lack of trying nor for the fear of failure itself.

As we say in the motherland - We move !

Life must continue and so it did , another JAMB result comes out and voila off to university to study, that was the year JAMB introduced different question sets to curb malpractices - didn't work , people just got smarter or bolder . I gained admission one of the best universities in Nigeria.

I didn't want to be there so it was a drag , while most people enjoyed their first year, I spent mine thinking about not wanting to be there. I wasn't so absent minded as to fail but I didn't give it my all or should I say I didn't let the university pass through me.

In hindsight I should have embraced the moment ,chased girls, partied moderately etc . Honestly my situation wasn't bad I just wanted more and I had spent a lot of time imagining myself somewhere else and my imagination definitely had wings.

In hindsight I had no business applying independently at that age , I had a better chance applying with my parents or even applying for a students visa. To be young and foolish eh , that feeling of being able to achieve everything and anything.

I am trying to think of what I learnt , well for one I learnt not everyone can get a visa because they feel like.

I didnt learn anything, I was 16, I was upset for a few days , maybe angry for some more but shortly after I kept it moving.

Round 1

I made my first independent visa application at the age of 16, I had traveled to a couple of countries as a child but by the time I was "ready"
my most recent travel was over 10 years old , so it was irrelevant. You could say my family was also one of the many that went to bed as middle class
and without any warning or logic we woke up poor.

I think I was driven by a combination of things , I had a number of family members and friends that had sold me the dream
(we all have friends and family that have come back from "the abroad" and described McDonalds burger as heavenly), let's throw in 90s hip-hop as well,
I wanted to be a nigga ( whatever that was), JAMB had also dealt me a nice score of 188 so I took that as a divine sign, I definitely wasn't made for Nigeria.


These were the days of booking US appointments via DHL, my appointment was at 6:30am, till date I have no idea why they made us turn up that early.
I got to Eleke Crescent about 45 minutes before my appointment, a journey that would have typically taken 1 hr only took 10 mins,
I saw my fellow aspiring Americans on the queue with a few Ajebos, from their dress code and mannerism you would guess they were frequent travelers not that the rest of us looked shabby but these ones just had a certain air about them.

Your standard Lagos drama was also going on , the bros on the other side of the road with a placard asking for justice,
the sister preaching and the military men being unnecessarily aggressive. One poor guy got severe beating that day too, no idea what he did.

I think I was on the queue for about 1hr 30 mins, I saw some of the officials come via the waterfront and strolling in as if our lives were in their hands, they had this hostile demeanor, even the gate man our fellow brethren was hostile.

The interview itself didn't last more than 2 minutes , before my interview I heard one bros shouting "I know my rights !",
they had to get security to drag him out. Maybe I shouldn't have laughed mentally at him, but I just thought the whole situation was a little funny,
what is the point of arguing with the consular after he has made a final decision.

In 2 minutes , the consular decided I wasn't worthy of a visa, the bastard didn't even check my documents which were all legit ,
he just asked what I was going for - holiday, who I was going to see - brother and aunty, what I was doing in Nigeria - computer school.I was confused, angry and many more emotions, with my head down , I went back to the car and was silent throughout my journey back home,
our driver at the time didn't even know what to say, he just let cry and cry I did.

That day I came to a conclusion that the default decision for the consular was to deny the application,
I also swore that I would be begged by the authorities later to apply for a visa.

I am still waiting for them to beg me