₦airaland Forum

yes he is a nairalander. i wanted a situation where he alone knows what im actually talking about thats why i used a new id. i have been calling him on phone but i think im disturbing him too much. im sending him the link to this post via sms so he can read it. i pray it doesnt worsen the situation. i just pray.

i decided to sign up a new id and use this medium to tell u that i still love u and that im sorry for messing up the way i did. i never meant to hurt u. im sorry i was overtaking by my fears. it was a moment of weakness. im sorry for doing the things that make u unhappy. pls remember all the things we talked about concerning making our relationship work. i dont want u to think im being desperate, u shd know me better than that. i just want u to know that i love u and i strongly believe in this love that we share. i know u love me even much more than i love u. u have always told me that. but i was surprised when u told me on phone that u didnt love me anymore up till now i dont know if u really meant that or not. no matter what i have done, will ur love for me just dissappear so quickly? i dont want to believe that.

concerning the difficulties u explained to me, i perfectly understand. its just that when im the only one getting in touch, it makes me feel like im the man in this relationship. i am a woman and i cannot take ur place. when im forced to do that, i only end up messing up just like ive done. u shd be the one seeking after me and not me after u. thats what Gods word says. im only to compliment u and not take over from u. i hurt u when i told u to get another girl. i shdnt have said that, i know i hurt u. but really all ive been trying to say is that i need u so much, im not coping well with ur silence and distance from me. we shd be working as 1 pls. i have learnt some bitter lessons these past 1 wk. pls give me a chance to do things better. i risked my life on the road just to come and apologise and possibly talk things over. i cld have died on the road or something, but i was willing to do it just to see ur face. many pple reading this will laugh at me and call me names but im ready to take all that cos i truelly and deeply love u. pls dont turn ur bak on me now. if im going wrong, pls correct me in love. remember i told u i needed someone who i can learn from. pls add value to my life and give me the courage and strength to do the same to u.

i have been going thru some psychological problems which all came up at the same time. i was scared that i was pregnant after what happened the other time u were around. after u left i didnt see my period until 2 days after the normal time. i remember telling u that. this month the same thing happened. it was to come on sunday but as at tuesday that i sent all those annoying sms it still had not come! i was feeling heavy all over my body. i was really scared, i didnt know what to think. ive not gotten pregnant b4 so i didnt know how it is. i had no one to talk to and whenever i called u, u were not responding as usual so i was scared to tell u. i was afraid cos ive heard that some women still menstrate even with pregnancy. secondly, i was facing some problems all of a sudden at work. i was suspended and the next day i was called to resume but to forfeit 1 wk salary. it wasnt easy on me at all. i needed u so much but u werent there at the time. im sorry i blew my top and transfered the aggression on u when i became to weak. i'm normally not like that. i try to handle situations very well but the pregnancy thing shook me off balance. i think the problem is that ive been bottling up so much cos i dont want to be seen as complaining. i didnt want to bother u with my emotional needs. i wanted to think of u and not me. but my luv, i cldnt handle it anymore. i ended up doing the worst. pls forgive me.

i really dont know what to say anymore. i just hope God will touch ur heart and make u see how i really mean all these words that i have typed here. i have asked him to give me the grace to be a good girlfriend to u. i have asked him to give me the grace to be that same person who always make u happy. i have been reading the books u gave me to read. i am still learning. pls tell me that it is well with us my darling.

i love u and i will always do.