₦airaland Forum

I just got married, and after welcoming our first daughter, my wife's elder brother told her that he would be sending his first daughter, who is only 6 years old, to come and live with us.
Every day, I see my wife washing a lot of clothes and taking care of our baby, as well as this little girl. Honestly, I feel sorry for my wife because she already has a lot on her hands. The little girl is still very young and cannot do much for herself. You cannot even send her on simple errands because of her age, so my wife has to take care of almost everything.
To be honest, I am not comfortable with this arrangement, but I don't know how to explain my feelings to my wife's elder brother without offending him or creating problems within the family.
Please, I need sincere advice. Am I wrong for feeling this way? How can I politely tell him that I am not comfortable having his daughter live with us, especially when we are still trying to adjust to life as a young family with a newborn?
I am genuinely confused and would appreciate your advice.

APOPTOSIS:
Avoid very poor ungrateful families
We say this everyday here and u guys think we're joking. Be smart always. Not all prayers work. The last time prayer worked was in Gethsamene

Haven't you asked yourselves why some people never beg even when they are not flamboyantly wealthy?
Avoid families that take crazy & senseless decisions.

Avoid families that perpetually recycle poverty. Be firm when choosing a Life partner. Poverty is not a joke
Go to locations where wealthy babes reside and fall in love. Learn from women!

I just got married, and after welcoming our first daughter, my wife's elder brother told her that he would be sending his first daughter, who is only 6 years old, to come and live with us.
Every day, I see my wife washing a lot of clothes and taking care of our baby, as well as this little girl. Honestly, I feel sorry for my wife because she already has a lot on her hands. The little girl is still very young and cannot do much for herself. You cannot even send her on simple errands because of her age, so my wife has to take care of almost everything.
To be honest, I am not comfortable with this arrangement, but I don't know how to explain my feelings to my wife's elder brother without offending him or creating problems within the family.
Please, I need sincere advice. Am I wrong for feeling this way? How can I politely tell him that I am not comfortable having his daughter live with us, especially when we are still trying to adjust to life as a young family with a newborn?
I am genuinely confused and would appreciate your advice.

Akir2025:
It's Rubbish...Insane and Lack of Shame Mother's Inlaws does that .Funny enough some Insane Daughters would even Encourage the Mumu Man to do so

Good question, you got my attention here .Who created numbers, and who created the calendar?” a lot of Christians believe they know Jesus Christ date of birth, it sounds so stupid to me. And I'm a Christian?
[ quote author=AllBlack post=141069019]

and you were there when he was born on the 25th of December.... or that's what you grew up knowing and you just roll with it.[/quote]

I assure you I wasn't being sarcastic. I was stating the reality of my situation, not making a joke about my worth or capabilities.
I understand your point, and I agree that an employer will always consider the cost of replacing an employee. However, I also believe that the value of a person should not be measured solely by how easily they can be replaced.
The fact that I can write well or have certain skills doesn't automatically mean I have access to better opportunities. Sometimes, people have to work with the opportunities available to them while striving for something better.
I appreciate your perspective, but I would prefer that you take what I said at face value rather than assume I was joking.

BizLeader:
I am going to believe you wrote this sarcastically.

1. Nobody that writes as well as you can earn N10, 000. Not in this present times.

2. It is a job. You can submit your CV somewhere else.

3. Know this; An employer will not pay you more than it takes to replace you.

But, as I said, I suspect you were joking about your salary.

The fact that someone can resign doesn't mean we should remain silent about unfair treatment or exploitation. People work because they have responsibilities, families to feed, and bills to pay. Having a job doesn't mean an employer has the right to treat workers unfairly or pay them poorly while making enormous profits from their labour. The issue is not about forcing anyone to work; it's about fairness, dignity, respect, and decent working conditions. Workers deserve better, and speaking up about injustice is not the same as refusing to work.

Samuels90:
He is not forcing you to work for him. You are working on your own will. If you not satisfied you can leave. From your statement you are not happy, why not resign, leave and get something else!

I work for a billionaire, serving as an attendant at one of his filling stations, a job I started in 2020. Despite working for him for six years, my salary has remained ₦10,000 until today. My boss owns 18 filling stations across Kaduna State.
On top of that, out of the ₦10,000 salary I earn, we are also expected to contribute ₦1,000 every week to pay people to clean his horse stable. He owns 15 horses.
This is one of the major experiences that has affected my mentality and pushed me towards considering illegal ways of making money, including cheating others. It pains me deeply because I know that this is not the kind of person I want to become.
After dedicating six years of my life to serving someone, I have nothing meaningful to show for it. Six years of hard work, loyalty and sacrifice, yet I am still struggling to make ends meet. Honestly, it hurts. It is wicked how some billionaires accumulate so much wealth while millions of people struggle to afford basic necessities. They have more money than they could ever spend in several lifetimes, yet some still exploit workers, avoid paying their fair share, and put profit above humanity. Wealth should come with responsibility, compassion, and a conscience. Being rich should never mean forgetting the suffering of others. The world needs more humanity, not just more billionaires.

In fact, in August 2024, the NCC reported that over 153 million SIM cards had been linked to NINs, representing 96% compliance. Yet SIM registration alone was never enough to guarantee security.
The bigger question Nigerians should ask
If the government made millions of Nigerians queue up to register their NINs and link their SIM cards in the name of national security, what measurable improvement did Nigerians experience in the fight against kidnapping, banditry and terrorism?
A policy should not be judged only by how many people complied with it, but also by whether it achieved the purpose for which it was introduced.
Buhari's government and Pantami's ministry should be open to scrutiny on the effectiveness of that policy. And subsequent governments should also be accountable for what they have done with the system they inherited.

dosage150:
So all these high rents everywhere is none of their business but how to document tenants

Voters card
BVN
NIN
SIM registration
Passports

And a lots more have our fingerprints captured yet no way to make good use of them

Yet there's is no centralised database to track crimes and other related matters

What do you want to do differently at this time ?

In fact, in August 2024, the NCC reported that over 153 million SIM cards had been linked to NINs, representing 96% compliance. Yet SIM registration alone was never enough to guarantee security.
The bigger question Nigerians should ask
If the government made millions of Nigerians queue up to register their NINs and link their SIM cards in the name of national security, what measurable improvement did Nigerians experience in the fight against kidnapping, banditry and terrorism?
A policy should not be judged only by how many people complied with it, but also by whether it achieved the purpose for which it was introduced.
Buhari's government and Pantami's ministry should be open to scrutiny on the effectiveness of that policy. And subsequent governments should also be accountable for what they have done with the system they inherited.

Flangelo12:
What is wrong with the proposed law?

[what's the title of the song if you don't mind telling me? quote author=eagleonearth post=141048623]To the best of my knowledge, Ice Prince of Zamani is 40yrs this year! That song he sang about terrorists attack in plateau brought tears to my eyes that year.

Happy birthday, Live long bro and may God be merciful to you.[/quote]

Became widely popular: 2010, following the release of "Oleku".
Debut album: Everybody Loves Ice Prince (2011).
Now, let's do the maths!
If someone is 45 years old in 2026, they were born around 1981.
When Ice Prince started making music in 1998:
That person was about 17 years old.
They would likely have been in secondary school.
Ice Prince himself was only about 12 years old.
So the person saying they were in secondary school when they started listening to Ice Prince could be telling the truth, especially if they mean his music from 2009–2011.
The interesting thing is that Ice Prince was already making music as a teenager, long before he became famous! 😄

Sirchiboy:
I am 45 years old and I was in secondary school when I started listening to him.
How?

OBJ and his effcc boys would have lead a brutal respond to atiku, if what was said is true. Atiku is a big name ask obj, even tinubu is scared of the guy 😂

CapitalLens:
https://blueprint.ng/2027-obasanjos-testimony-on-atiku-amaechi-s-entry-worsened-adc-ticket-wike/

There is historical evidence of a connection between Muhammad Yusuf, Boko Haram's founder, and the Izala movement. However, the relationship changed over time.
Yusuf was a Salafi preacher who had connections with the wider religious circles associated with Izala.
Research describes him as having broken away from Izala around 2002–2005, as his teachings and views increasingly diverged from those of established Izala leaders.
Yusuf founded and led the movement that became known as Boko Haram until his death in police custody in 2009.

farouk2much:
Terrorist organization.... Sunni muslims are very bad to the world

There is historical evidence of a connection between Muhammad Yusuf, Boko Haram's founder, and the Izala movement. However, the relationship changed over time.
Yusuf was a Salafi preacher who had connections with the wider religious circles associated with Izala.
Research describes him as having broken away from Izala around 2002–2005, as his teachings and views increasingly diverged from those of established Izala leaders.
Yusuf founded and led the movement that became known as Boko Haram until his death in police custody in 2009.

Razzness:
They condemn it only because the video went viral, but what those kids were chanting reflects JIBWIS's teachings.

JIBWIS's teachings are borderline extremist, and it is from them that every single religious extremist group emerged. From Mai-Tatsine to boko haram, ISWAP, and Lakurawa

There is historical evidence of a connection between Muhammad Yusuf, Boko Haram's founder, and the Izala movement. However, the relationship changed over time.
Yusuf was a Salafi preacher who had connections with the wider religious circles associated with Izala.
Research describes him as having broken away from Izala around 2002–2005, as his teachings and views increasingly diverged from those of established Izala leaders.
Yusuf founded and led the movement that became known as Boko Haram until his death in police custody in 2009. author=stuffs2002 post=141022462]Good. Many Muslims including me have come out to condemn the actions of those kids in uniform.

That this is against the teaching of Islam.


Christians should learn to condemn bad things done by Christians against people of other faith. Take for example, many Christians supported and defended Peter Obi and Bishop Oyedepo when they declared a religious war on Muslims in the 2023 presidential election. [/quote]

There is historical evidence of a connection between Muhammad Yusuf, Boko Haram's founder, and the Izala movement. However, the relationship changed over time.
Yusuf was a Salafi preacher who had connections with the wider religious circles associated with Izala.
Research describes him as having broken away from Izala around 2002–2005, as his teachings and views increasingly diverged from those of established Izala leaders.
Yusuf founded and led the movement that became known as Boko Haram until his death in police custody in 2009.

the historical relationship between Muhammad Yusuf, Boko Haram and the Izala movement, and whether the violence in Jos since 2004 and the Boko Haram insurgency have been part of a coordinated operation by people acting in disguise.[color=#000099][/color]

You're very funny my dude.

blackmantis:
Where is hisba?

Eto’o won three Champions League titles and four African Player of the Year awards, but never won the Ballon d’Or. Many fans consider that one of the biggest omissions in his individual honours.

HacheNoire:
Scam!

FIFA has become a joke!

Kane is very good no doubt, but he doesn’t belong not deserve it in those league of players up against him.

Samuel Eto’o was one of the greatest African footballers, and many fans believe he deserved to win the Ballon d’Or at least once. [ quote author=Germi9 post=141019971]
Very rubbish thing… sha as the rest na blacks na dem give white man wey no play anything[/quote]

Human beings are remarkably good at creating groups: tribes, religions, ethnicities, nations, political parties, social classes, and countless other identities.
Belonging to a group can give us comfort and purpose. But it can also make us believe that our group is superior and that outsiders are less deserving of compassion.
We may condemn a terrible act when our enemy commits it, yet justify the same act when someone from our own group does it.
The tragedy is that we often love people because they belong to us, rather than because we recognise their humanity.
And the person we call an enemy may be a father, a mother, a child, or a frightened human being who wants the same basic things we do.
Not totally correct bro,

That is why the word *nurturing exist.

The parent(family) is the first, immediately, closet institution that mould the human mind before they turn something else.

Other factors such as the Religion, peers , school, society, social media etc are also there to mould your the children for you. How far they succeed, depends on how well the first institution parent(family) stands.


Howwever, In some cases, one will just leave it to destiny ( if you believe in that) .. that is , what will be, will be.

If I may point an accusing finger, I will point it at the mother.[/quote]

I doubt your claim?

GanagiBitrus:
For those of you doubting ghosts,
Go to any big local market, bend down & look through your legs. Then come back & testify.

That's if you survive to testify.

Naturally human beings are create to hate each other. Don't blame any parents for such move.

Atiku Abubakar PDP 445,671 40.40%
Bola Ahmed Tinubu APC 321,691 29.16%
Peter Obi Labour Party (LP) 253,207 22.95%
Rabiu Kwankwaso NNPP 72,204 6.55%quote author=Osgood230 post=140864110]Ask Nuhu rebadu. Nuhu is clearing road for his election bit coming 230 you need to be wise 😂 elrufai said it before, elrufai was trying to say something but you guys eve deaf ears to listen. The battle isn't between tinubu and elrufai , but elrufai and rebadu mallam say it clear before he was arrested, so why are you blaming tinubu the innocent monitor?[/quote]

Ask Nuhu rebadu. Nuhu is clearing road for his election bit coming 230 you need to be wise 😂 elrufai said it before, elrufai was trying to say something but you guys eve deaf ears to listen. The battle isn't between tinubu and elrufai , but elrufai and rebadu mallam say it clear before he was arrested, so why are you blaming tinubu the innocent monitor?

saintkel:
so u agree that both Elnrufai and Tinubu spoke anyhow against Jonathan but Jonathan being a Democrat choose to ignore them...same thing Tinubu can't do and u guys call him a master strategist....what is he exactly strategizing?....I dey shame on una behalf seriously

Which strategic are you talking about?
Is it the one he used in kaduna and suffer defeat from PDP . Atiku won kaduna am I right? All the 3 senatorial zones in the state elrufai suffer defeat so what nonsense are you talking about? Please educate me I want to know the strategy he use in 20.. 19

AMINDA:
At what point did Tinubu become aware that he terrorised the people of Southern Kaduna? Was it before or after Tinubu begged him in Kaduna to help make him president or after he bailed Tinubu out at Chatham house? No be una again?

Look how attentive they were when they were learning from the real master strategist during electioneering. Tinubu simply panicked after seeing how Elrufai brought Obi, Atiku, and Kwankwaso into a single coalition. Just as he has panicked with Atiku's subsidy plan and reintroduced subsidy. Indeed, cowards die a thousand times before their deaths.

Lol 😂 how would I believe what you are saying? 2019 result is available for you to recheck on Google. Sir you don't really know what you're saying yet, The three senatorial seat elrufai suffer defeat from are know in Apc 😂 elrufai would have supported Rotimi ameachi against atiku ask me why? 😬

digitalman2811:
I believe APC is just clipping his wings until after the elections,APC knew how powerful elrufia can be during elections. He was for APC in 2023,now he is against APC in 2026 onwards. He needed to be pinned down temporarily.

Who's elrufai in kaduna state? Elrufai don't have that capacity in kaduna state.
Anyone saying elrufai make tinubu a president doesn't really knows what he is saying, someone should ask Ahmed makarfi the best in all time how he suffered before delivering kaduna to OBJ in those days. The most funny thing is that in 2019 elrufai los all the 3 senatorial seat to atiku? Mallam isn't relevant in my state kaduna , mark this from today tinubu is winning kaduna coming 27 with a large margin.

Parachoko:
Show us the Presidential Election result from Kaduna State

You're totally right, we're bless

ayusco85:
I was actually asking the OP considering he is based in port Harrow. I am from Southern too. We are the headquarters of ginger

Sure .you're right

ARCD:
I believe it grows nationwide but kaduna is more interested in growing it

AndysonOfficial:
Can you send one full paint bucket of kaduna soil for us in Port Harcourt?

Yes, I can arrange that for you. I’ll send a full paint bucket of soil from Kaduna so you can compare it with the soil you have in Port Harcourt. Let me know when you’re ready, and we’ll arrange how to get it to you.

franchasng:
Kano state doesn't need much work cos Tinubu knows his limits; he cannot dare his usual thuggery politics in Kano and other core Northern states, his power end in Lagos via MC Oluomo's NURTW thugs, then Rivers via Nyesome Wike's cultists

😁😀😁

oluegboigiherbs:
Agriculture is Life...Natural Herbs, keep planting in large quantity,I know how much I always buy it whenever I want to concoct herbs along side other roots and leaves. Well done 👍

I actually have a turmeric farm back home. I used to harvest around 20 to 30 bags of turmeric every year. Turmeric farming is quite common in my area, and the soil and climate are very suitable for it. It’s something I’ve been familiar with for a long time, well I'm from southern kaduna turmeric and ginger is very common here.