₦airaland Forum

Gobdddd:
Strickly for the married

Good evening tweeps, my marriage is jerking. Needs a quick solution.

We married 9years ago.
She was a virgin in my Church. I am a pastor too.
Though we were not in the same state.
She was the first woman I had sex with after our marriage.
But I noticed that she has no interest in anything called sex.
She will not deny me sex, but I do not enjoy it because she's not enthused to it.

I have tried all I could to make her love sex, but all to no avail.
If you do not demand for sex, she'll not show any interest, even if you stay one year without talking about it.
And I am 100% sure that she's not seeing any man anywhere.

I took my time to educate her from the little research I made, but she wouldn't pay any serious attention.

I querried myself as to wether I do not satisfy her, on another point, sometimes, I'd last for 10-15 mins which, according to research is not bad.

Last night, I got angry at her attitude towards it. To me, she just try to open legs for me to satisfy myself and get down.

This has affected my psyche towards her.
But apart from her low libido, she is a very wonderful and good woman to be with.

So, last night, I opened up to her once again and told her she's making me to think twice and that am not happy at her actions.

Since today, our relationship has dwindled.

Alot of things have been going through my mind.

I don't know what to do. Am confused.
I can't go to another woman and leave such a good woman that have given me 4 kids.

Pls is there any known solution?

I need help.

Kobojunkiee:
How in the world can you conclude that that she has not experienced good sex.

OP was inexperienced and you suppose that over 9 years he has not upped his game enough?

Good sex is relative!

Davash222:
A married pastor with 4 kids and you're still bothered about sex

With this Buhari economy, you still thinking about the quality of sex from your wife after 4 kids?

Your main concern shouldn't be about the quality of sex as a man of God. You have 4 kids, concentrate more on them and how to convert many souls to Christ. Leave quality sex for worldly people, Sir.

ayomilore:
Bro. Don't spoil your marriage because of what you can fix. I heard there are some recipes that improve libido, try it, you can watch some adult films together too, try serious romance prior to your lovemaking, I believe there should be improvement...
But your wife will be good for all these abroad hustlers ooo that are scared of all these local predators..

Lokojatoofar:
Why won't they complain? When you men use your youth to Bleep and masturbate to every hole you come across before, during and after wedding. Then you turn around and expect your wife to just endure your impotence. Kò lè werk. Drink all the enhancement drugs and do your job on madam. Abi you go allow her go outside?

Saintmary:
This woman spent her body 4 times to give you those kids,

During pregnancy, a woman's body goes through some major upheaval.

She is still taking care of your household, running around to keep things smooth, yet you're asking for bedmatics.

It will take her nothing less than 5 years to get her body back!

Learn patience, it's time for you to prove worthy of the commitment she has given you.

Let your kids spend a lot of time on holidays with grandma, uncle's and aunts while you take that time to relax with her, things will get better definitely.

Gobdddd:
Strickly for the married

Good evening tweeps, my marriage is jerking. Needs a quick solution.

We married 9years ago.
She was a virgin in my Church. I am a pastor too.
Though we were not in the same state.
She was the first woman I had sex with after our marriage.
But I noticed that she has no interest in anything called sex.
She will not deny me sex, but I do not enjoy it because she's not enthused to it.

I have tried all I could to make her love sex, but all to no avail.
If you do not demand for sex, she'll not show any interest, even if you stay one year without talking about it.
And I am 100% sure that she's not seeing any man anywhere.

I took my time to educate her from the little research I made, but she wouldn't pay any serious attention.

I querried myself as to wether I do not satisfy her, on another point, sometimes, I'd last for 10-15 mins which, according to research is not bad.

Last night, I got angry at her attitude towards it. To me, she just try to open legs for me to satisfy myself and get down.

This has affected my psyche towards her.
But apart from her low libido, she is a very wonderful and good woman to be with.

So, last night, I opened up to her once again and told her she's making me to think twice and that am not happy at her actions.

Since today, our relationship has dwindled.

Alot of things have been going through my mind.

I don't know what to do. Am confused.
I can't go to another woman and leave such a good woman that have given me 4 kids.

Pls is there any known solution?

I need help.

godliman:
Between the men and women I don't know who is more guilty. Those men you spoke of were sadly seduced by women who are now complaining. Sow the wind and reap the whirlwind. I admit some men are he goats but many ladies are also she dogs

Botking:
Retired man , 4 kid already, 9 year of marriage

Retired in peace

Fucus in other things in life

Sex is not food

That's how the body of women become after many kids,

Sex will be sweet to her again when she gets to her 50th

delzbaba:
After four children her libido must have reduced, you self pipe low on the sex issue haba theres more to life than sex.

Botking:
Retired man , 4 kid already, 9 year of marriage

Retired in peace

Fucus in other things in life

Sex is not food

That's how the body of women become after many kids,

Sex will be sweet to her again when she gets to her 50th

Gobdddd:
Strickly for the married

Good evening tweeps, my marriage is jerking. Needs a quick solution.

We married 9years ago.
She was a virgin in my Church. I am a pastor too.
Though we were not in the same state.
She was the first woman I had sex with after our marriage.
But I noticed that she has no interest in anything called sex.
She will not deny me sex, but I do not enjoy it because she's not enthused to it.

I have tried all I could to make her love sex, but all to no avail.
If you do not demand for sex, she'll not show any interest, even if you stay one year without talking about it.
And I am 100% sure that she's not seeing any man anywhere.

I took my time to educate her from the little research I made, but she wouldn't pay any serious attention.

I querried myself as to wether I do not satisfy her, on another point, sometimes, I'd last for 10-15 mins which, according to research is not bad.

Last night, I got angry at her attitude towards it. To me, she just try to open legs for me to satisfy myself and get down.

This has affected my psyche towards her.
But apart from her low libido, she is a very wonderful and good woman to be with.

So, last night, I opened up to her once again and told her she's making me to think twice and that am not happy at her actions.

Since today, our relationship has dwindled.

Alot of things have been going through my mind.

I don't know what to do. Am confused.
I can't go to another woman and leave such a good woman that have given me 4 kids.

Pls is there any known solution?

I need help.

Lollittaa:
I think he knows that already,yet chose to come here. And I'm not assuming anything. I'm a Christian, you're an atheist. Except you're genuinely concerned, NOTHING I say will make any sense to you. Why? Because you don't believe.

udemzyudex:
Bear with her? Easier said than done, you think he hasn't bear with her enough before posting it here,a pastor for that matter.

Of course nobody is perfect but that doesn't mean we shouldn't work towards getting the best part of us.

This is one of the reason i go against no sex before marriage, those biblical sh1tting talks about premarital sex is bullshit because at the end you will be the only one to carry your cross, you will be the only one to bear the pains.

Knowing your partner sexual prowess should be one of the things to be considered before marrying him/her because lack of sex have destroyed a lot of marriage, some live as siblings now in their house.

shawante:
So are you suggesting he should divorce his wife?

cooooooks:
Today I learned that every Christian agrees on everything.

You told the OP to not allow anyone to make him feel bad about not linking the situation. I completely agree with that statement (I thought NOTHING you say will make sense to me). Some other commenters, probably Christian, said he should relax, that she's given birth to children, that's there's nothing else to worry about, etc.

You disagree with Christians on this forum ALL THE TIME.



This is Vs them approach does not apply here.

Gobdddd:
Strickly for the married

Good evening tweeps, my marriage is jerking. Needs a quick solution.

We married 9years ago.
She was a virgin in my Church. I am a pastor too.
Though we were not in the same state.
She was the first woman I had sex with after our marriage.
But I noticed that she has no interest in anything called sex.
She will not deny me sex, but I do not enjoy it because she's not enthused to it.

I have tried all I could to make her love sex, but all to no avail.
If you do not demand for sex, she'll not show any interest, even if you stay one year without talking about it.
And I am 100% sure that she's not seeing any man anywhere.

I took my time to educate her from the little research I made, but she wouldn't pay any serious attention.

I querried myself as to wether I do not satisfy her, on another point, sometimes, I'd last for 10-15 mins which, according to research is not bad.

Last night, I got angry at her attitude towards it. To me, she just try to open legs for me to satisfy myself and get down.

This has affected my psyche towards her.
But apart from her low libido, she is a very wonderful and good woman to be with.

So, last night, I opened up to her once again and told her she's making me to think twice and that am not happy at her actions.

Since today, our relationship has dwindled.

Alot of things have been going through my mind.

I don't know what to do. Am confused.
I can't go to another woman and leave such a good woman that have given me 4 kids.

Pls is there any known solution?

I need help.

purples25:
Actually, some of us don't feel any excitement about this thing called sex. Some women do anything you want, act very excited, but it's just so that they don't feel pain from being reluctant during the whole thing. Because moods can close that place up.

So sorry, just wanted to drop the hint. Some women just pretend to love it, and you guys buy it. Do you know that some of us don't feel anything sweet about the whole sex thing? Anybody who wants to know the truth and stop assuming the male, comforting belief that women enjoy the thing too should consider this.

It's a weird truth, but it's true. But you'll never know because, well, she smiles and tells you she likes it like this or that.

litaninja:
Knack before marriage...una go dey form pastor....you see yoursef now?

purples25:
Actually, some of us don't feel any excitement about this thing called sex. Some women do anything you want, act very excited, but it's just so that they don't feel pain from being reluctant during the whole thing. Because moods can close that place up.

So sorry, just wanted to drop the hint. Some women just pretend to love it, and you guys buy it. Do you know that some of us don't feel anything sweet about the whole sex thing? Anybody who wants to know the truth and stop assuming the male, comforting belief that women enjoy the thing too should consider this.

It's a weird truth, but it's true. But you'll never know because, well, she smiles and tells you she likes it like this or that.

Codedrock:
My guess is you are definitely one of those women that are obsessed with sex.. You might even like it too much..

Don't get me wrong, I know there women who don't enjoy sex that much or don't like it and fake it due to a lot things like circumcision and etc..

But I'm certain you love sex, so no need to lie to yourself or convince yourself on nairaland

Gobdddd:
Strickly for the married

Good evening tweeps, my marriage is jerking. Needs a quick solution.

We married 9years ago.
She was a virgin in my Church. I am a pastor too.
Though we were not in the same state.
She was the first woman I had sex with after our marriage.
But I noticed that she has no interest in anything called sex.
She will not deny me sex, but I do not enjoy it because she's not enthused to it.

I have tried all I could to make her love sex, but all to no avail.
If you do not demand for sex, she'll not show any interest, even if you stay one year without talking about it.
And I am 100% sure that she's not seeing any man anywhere.

I took my time to educate her from the little research I made, but she wouldn't pay any serious attention.

I querried myself as to wether I do not satisfy her, on another point, sometimes, I'd last for 10-15 mins which, according to research is not bad.

Last night, I got angry at her attitude towards it. To me, she just try to open legs for me to satisfy myself and get down.

This has affected my psyche towards her.
But apart from her low libido, she is a very wonderful and good woman to be with.

So, last night, I opened up to her once again and told her she's making me to think twice and that am not happy at her actions.

Since today, our relationship has dwindled.

Alot of things have been going through my mind.

I don't know what to do. Am confused.
I can't go to another woman and leave such a good woman that have given me 4 kids.

Pls is there any known solution?

I need help.

longetivity:
Me fight over sex this era of pussy God forbid

Davash222:
A married pastor with 4 kids and you're still bothered about sex

With this Buhari economy, you still thinking about the quality of sex from your wife after 4 kids?

Your main concern shouldn't be about the quality of sex as a man of God. You have 4 kids, concentrate more on them and how to convert many souls to Christ. Leave quality sex for worldly people, Sir.

ImaIma1:
You guys are making it sound like pastors have a different set of hormones and body system, and therefore, they should not enjoy sex because they are pastors.

He is a man first before he is a Pastor. Whether he likes it or not, the desire to have and enjoy sex is in him. No speaking in tongues can take that away.

Codedrock:
My guess is you are definitely one of those women that are obsessed with sex.. You might even like it too much..

Don't get me wrong, I know there are women who don't enjoy sex that much or don't like it and fake it due to a lot things like circumcision and etc..

But I'm certain you love sex, so no need to lie to yourself or convince yourself on nairaland

Image123:
All the ones that knack before marriage, where are their marriages today? Someone has 4 kids, 9 years of marriage and a faithful wife who is not complaining or denying. Your knack before marriage idols would kill for that.

MrBrownJay1:
have you ever taken the time to ask her what she desires/likes in the bedroom?! did you guys dated before marriage? how was the sexual part then? was she ever enthusiastic about sex or was it always like that?

if you could manage for 9yrs then..... hang in there bro!

whatever goes through your mind, unless you wanna divorce the babe or get a second wife, anythging else isnt worthy!