₦airaland Forum

Hi, in a situation where you love pets e.g dog and your life partner or fiance does not, how will you convince him or her to let you own one when you guys are married?
Let me give you an example: before i got married to my ex husband, he knew of my deep love for nature especially foreign pet dogs, bird, flowers. He didn't share the same opinion with me though but said he "may" consider allowing me own a pet dog after we get married and move into a bigger apartment. Well after we got married and moved into a flat with plenty space in the compound to keep a dog, he refused me getting one despite my pleas and the fact that i told him i will personally be responsible for the upkeep. He said he would rather prefer to have a goat as a pet than a dog. He even threatened to poison the dog or bird if i brought any. I eventually didn't.
So peradventure your partner is anti pet, how do you convince him to let you own one or bring the one you already own to his house after marriage?

I don't know; talk to the person about it but if they reject the idea in entirety, you may have to choose between the pet and the person.

There is no way. The person either loves pets or they don't. My husband likes dogs and wants to have a pet dog. I told him he can bring the dog o but i will personally poison the dog. We haven't had a dog yet which is just okay with me.

Like Maclatunji has said, you either choose the pet or the person.

choose the goat as he said

maclatunji: I don't know; talk to the person about it but if they reject the idea in entirety, you may have to choose between the pet and the person.

very true.

I love dogs and used to av one befor i got married,my hubby never liked it but befor we got married he picked a little intrest in mine cos he visited often befor married,now we are married i dare not raise d issue of gettin one into our home cos i already know d rely i would get. Him liking it dosnt mean he wnts one as a pet in his home. I only get to see my dog only wen i visit my parents..

You guys are funny ooo! Choose between a pet and man. Mbanu it can never get to that stage. Its just ok that some persons don't like pets. The best i can ever do will be to plead and make the person understand but if he just doesn't want, i will give up the idea of keeping the pet. That is why am seeking for ideas on how i can convince him in case he happens to be an anti pet.

But honestly the loyal and true friendship a pet dog offers is something you rarely find these days.

^^^ It has gotten to that stage cos you just chose the man and damned the pet. There are some people that believe that the dog is a part of their family like a child. If the partner rejects the dog, then they kiss the relationship goodbye.
Can't understand all the hoopla about dogs.

blank: ^^^ It has gotten to that stage cos you just chose the man and damned the pet. There are some people that believe that the dog is a part of their family like a child. If the partner rejects the dog, then they kiss the relationship goodbye.
Can't understand all the hoopla about dogs.

That's extreme. That only happens in yankee.

@OP
we all know how some people have deep rooted fear of dog due to something that happened to them in their childhood, so you first have to try to understand why that person is against a pet like that.
if you tell your man that this is what you want and he is telling you that he will poison the pet if you bring one, then i will say that you have a SERIOUS problem on your hands.

here is what it clearly says to me: he married you now (he got you), so he doesnt need to pretend to be who he is not, and to HELL with any of your desires. life is just about HIM and he will do anything to make sure that it stays that way.

kinda miserable but suerte!!!!!

MRbrownJAY: @OP
we all know how some people have deep rooted fear of dog due to something that happened to them in their childhood, so you first have to try to understand why that person is against a pet like that.
if you tell your man that this is what you want and he is telling you that he will poison the pet if you bring one, then i will say that you have a SERIOUS problem on your hands.

here is what it clearly says to me: he married you now (he got you), so he doesnt need to pretend to be who he is not, and to HELL with any of your desires. life is just about HIM and he will do anything to make sure that it stays that way.

kinda miserable but suerte!!!!!

Note i said ex husband is my first post. We didn't seperate because of dog ooooo but the 7 months failed marriage was all about HIM. No wonder.

PrettyCindy: Note i said ex husband is my first post. We didn't seperate because of dog ooooo but the 7 months failed marriage was all about HIM. No wonder.

my bad, ex husband. at least you got out of there! better get a pet BEFORE you get with someone else.....to make sure that pets will be included from the start.

MRbrownJAY: my bad, ex husband. at least you got out of there! better get a pet BEFORE you get with someone else.....to make sure that pets will be included from the start.

But don't you think it will be wrong to force your partner to love your pet? Its like giving him/conditions. That is why am trying to get ideas to make him love the pet naturally.

^^^not at all, i only see it as letting that person now (from the get go) who you are. you like pet so why should you settle with a guy who doesnt?! this is you and therefore you shouldnt think that it is a problem to have a pet......and if he doesnt then you guys are not made for one another (unless you are desperate to get hitched again)

You can't "condition" someone to love animals and besides most dogs in Nigeria are coveted for their viciousness, so you would have a hard task convincing a non dog lover that your pet is really friendly. I love dogs and sometimes have upto 12 in one go and of course they know me so are affectionate with me, but nothing you would say to me would make me stroke any of your dogs if I see you walking by with them, as they are still animals at the end of the day hence remain unpredictable and my dogs are so loyal to me and only me that they know which boyfriends to allow sit on the couch in the lounge and which boyfriends not to allow past the front main gate


So ideally making this condition mandatory as a prerequisite to someone having a relationship with you, is an unworkable dealbreaker in the Nigerian setting and you would just be restricting yourself from the pool of men available to date/marry you.

^^^can you "condition" the OP to NOT love pets?! are you saying that she should drop her desire to own a pet, in order to "hopefully" get a man?! would you get rid of your dogs for the right man?!
should "PET LOVER" simply be an attribute in finding the right man?

If you're already in the relationship then this should have been ironed out beforehand.

If one partner doesnt like pets then yes, you might have to consider not having one at least until he or she changes their mind.


The reason i'm saying this is because some people are allergic to pet hair, and their partners still have to make compromises for them on this issue.

MRbrownJAY: ^^^can you "condition" the OP to NOT love pets?!

I have never said that. My stance is what is good for the goose is equally good for the gander, Mr MBJ.

MRbrownJAY: are you saying that she should drop her desire to own a pet, in order to "hopefully" get a man?!

I applied the non-absolute theorem that "the sum is greater than or equal to. . ." in this instance. And here we are led to believe OP is a single Mum based in "that" Country called Nigeria.

MRbrownJAY: would you get rid of your dogs for the right man?!

Love me love my dogs is one of my motto, so if this were a prerequisite of mine "at that time", then the man ain't the right man if he wants to impose his command for no just cause.

For instance, once upon a time in Nigeria, we stopped by this Vet's Clinic and I got sold on this cutest pup you have ever seen in the world and had to have it there and then. I got my way . . . Fast forward to a week later, I returned to base. . . got talking to the vet who told me dearest Hubby had returned my pup, my specially coveted chosen pup from the bloodlines of champion oh, and that he got a brindle in replacement and that my pup died from longing and pining for us.

I got on the phone to hubby and naturally was upset and lashing out and refused to listen to his plea to hear him out, although he had some cogent point for making that move. . .although I never let on, but I realised his right to be concerned the bundle of fluff that I was cooing over and fussing over was soon gonna grow up into this humongous monstrousity aka South African Boerboel a 200lb of pure muscle with head 6 times bigger than mine and a massive jaw and he did not feel comfortable with it being around the children. . .

MRbrownJAY: should "PET LOVER" simply be an attribute in finding the right man?

Well it shouldn't be in the ideal world but welcome to your Nigeria

@tpiah, am not yet into any rship sha. I intend buying a puppy for me and my son to play with later. I just hope God directs a pet lover or someone who would appreciate mine even if he doesn't naturally like them. I just love those cute little dogs. Their loyalty is what trips me. Thanks everyone for your contributions.

though am not yet married but I will definitely have a dog before marrying so that my supposed spouse will know my stance and love for dogs if he likes animals and don't mind then fine......if not then he can go, it might not be simple but it has to be done anyhow.
I feel those that loves animals (dogs especially) are good people while the non animal lovers are cruel, sadistic and insensitive people. therefore I don't like them around me.

PrettyCindy:
That's extreme. That only happens in yankee.

I'd do same...seriously. ...can't leave any of my pets 4 anyone. ..even my mum dat hates dog speaks wt my animals and dey don't bark at her even when dey met her for the 1st time.....anyone that cares about u will compromise 2 accommodate ur interest especially if its ur means of livelihood or even ur happiness

PrettyCindy:
Note i said ex husband is my first post. We didn't seperate because of dog ooooo but the 7 months failed marriage was all about HIM. No wonder.

u see...ur interest comes 1st and any man shd respect ur wish. .....pets are there always unlike any frnd ever.....and why not love ds cuties

PrettyCindy:
But don't you think it will be wrong to force your partner to love your pet? Its like giving him/conditions. That is why am trying to get ideas to make him love the pet naturally.

just be ursef...don't deprive ursef......get a cutie and love him/her