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Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? - Family - Nairaland

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Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by homelybabe: 10:25am On Mar 08
Plz I need your advice folks.
I'm newly married. Before I married,I got a government teaching job in the east. My husband stays in Lagos but I stay in one of the states in the east. We got married in January this year and since then it's been difficult for us because of the distance. My husband is doing a good job in Lagos. I'm just afraid of relocating and staying idle at home,coupled with the fear of losing a government job that is pensionable. My friends and colleagues advised me to continue with my work and visit him during the holidays but some advised against such. I'm in a tight spot right now and don't want to take a decision I will end up regretting tomorrow. Please,your opinions are needed. Thanks.
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Nice2023(m): 10:43am On Mar 08
I work in govt too...have u check the life and style of people in that office to know if what u are saying is true?
Government job doesn't guarantee a secure future except multiple stealing that goes in there.

I tell u for free...if ur salary isn't upto 150k minimum pls,go and join ur husband.

I have worked for 9years going to 10 and my pension has been terribly depleted,dwarfed and devalued and I have only found solace in my side income and about to quit the so called govt work.

It is easy to say that such jobs are pensionable but they don't guarantee the future...as most govt workers now owe online loan more than any group of people in Nigeria currently.

Finally,join ur husband and start a business in Lagos as soon as possible.

This is my opinion and not a final conclusion...maka indi uta.

Good luck to u.


homelybabe:
Plz I need your advice folks.
I'm newly married. Before I married,I got a government teaching job in the east. My husband stays in Lagos but I stay in one of the states in the east. We got married in January this year and since then it's been difficult for us because of the distance. My husband is doing a good job in Lagos. I'm just afraid of relocating and staying idle at home,coupled with the fear of losing a government job that is pensionable. My friends and colleagues advised me to continue with my work and visit him during the holidays but some advised against such. I'm in a tight spot right now and don't want to take a decision I will end up regretting tomorrow. Please,your opinions are needed. Thanks.

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Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by homelybabe: 11:03am On Mar 08
Nice2023:
I work in govt too...have u check the life and style of people in that office to know if what u are saying is true?
Government job doesn't guarantee a secure future except multiple stealing that goes in there.

I tell u for free...if ur salary isn't upto 150k minimum pls,go and join ur husband.

I have worked for 9years going to 10 and my pension has been terribly depleted,dwarfed and devalued and I have only found solace in my side income and about to quit the so called govt work.

It is easy to say that say that such jobs are pensionable but they don't guarantee the future...as most govt workers now owe online loan more than any group of people in Nigeria currently.

Finally,join ur husband and start a business in Lagos as soon as possible.

This is my opinion and not a final conclusion...maka indi uta.

Good luck to u.


Thanks a lot for the advice. The money isn't up to 70k. I'm still in level 8

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Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Nice2023(m): 11:05am On Mar 08
homelybabe:

Thanks a lot for the advice. The money isn't up to 70k. I'm still in level 8


I am in level 10 waiting for my 12 soon...but i can vividly tell u,that govt job is a no no for me.

By next year I am leaving.

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Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by JulianBond007: 11:19am On Mar 08
Madam relocate and join your husband in Lagos since you're newly married. You know definitely your husband will not relocate to join you. Your marriage is too young for both of you to be apart.

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Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by gbengaoyeladun(m): 11:24am On Mar 08
Go and be with your husband madam

3 Likes

Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Sonnobax15(m): 11:28am On Mar 08
undecided
Aunty go and join your husband abeg...

No Nigerian govt work is pensionable these days......At least I can go on and on to list people whom worked their entire life for govt only for them to retire without receiving any shishi pension....Some of them don even die self......

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Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Zonefree(m): 11:45am On Mar 08
Nice2023:



I am in level 10 waiting for my 12 soon...but i can vividly tell u,that govt job is a no no for me.

By next year I am leaving.
Allow her to reach your level before advising her to quit.

Government job is a no no for you but you don reach level 10, waiting for 12. undecided

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Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by TheWinterBird(f): 11:49am On Mar 08
You and him should've discussed something like this before the marriage but living apart as newlyweds should not be an option. You're newly married, so you and your spouse should be living together as husband and wife. This is your honeymoon stage that you should be enjoying together.

You can start applying for jobs in Lagos where he is, then move there once you find, or move now and hope you'll find. In any case, you should be together and you should have your own means of income, as you don't want to rely only on your husband's money. Having your own money as a woman is power.

8 Likes

Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Acidosis(m): 12:40pm On Mar 08
Government workers and the fear of losing their pension. cheesy By the time you're retiring from that work, your pension will be worth next to nothing (assuming the Naira continues to fall in the manner we have seen in the last 10-20 years). There are many reasons why you may want to stay, but that pension is completely off the list.

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Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Nice2023(m): 12:45pm On Mar 08
Zonefree:

Allow her to reach your level before advising her to quit.

Government job is a no no for you but you don reach level 10, waiting for 12. undecided


If u are sensible enough u will know that she asked for an advice and I gave one based on what she demanded for and I added a caveat that says: my opinion and not a conclusion.

Grow up and pray for more sense so that u don't grow into a fool at old age.

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Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Nice2023(m): 12:47pm On Mar 08
homelybabe:

Thanks a lot for the advice. The money isn't up to 70k. I'm still in level 8


U are most welcome.
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by jesmond3945: 1:06pm On Mar 08
homelybabe:
Plz I need your advice folks.
I'm newly married. Before I married,I got a government teaching job in the east. My husband stays in Lagos but I stay in one of the states in the east. We got married in January this year and since then it's been difficult for us because of the distance. My husband is doing a good job in Lagos. I'm just afraid of relocating and staying idle at home,coupled with the fear of losing a government job that is pensionable. My friends and colleagues advised me to continue with my work and visit him during the holidays but some advised against such. I'm in a tight spot right now and don't want to take a decision I will end up regretting tomorrow. Please,your opinions are needed. Thanks.
before you relocate get a job in lagos, if not there would be problems. Use this time to apply and secure a job in lagos your husbands job not withstanding.

1 Like

Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by jesmond3945: 1:09pm On Mar 08
homelybabe:

Thanks a lot for the advice. The money isn't up to 70k. I'm still in level 8
find a way and transfer your service to lagos. Dont listen to anybody telling you to resign and relocate without any job waiting for you.

2 Likes

Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Mom007(f): 1:24pm On Mar 08
You are not ready for marriage madam.

3 Likes

Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by homelybabe: 2:02pm On Mar 08
jesmond3945:
find a way and transfer your service to lagos. Dont listen to anybody telling you to resign and relocate without any job waiting for you.
Thanks but my State doesn't do Inter-State transfer
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by inforesource: 2:43pm On Mar 08
homelybabe:
Plz I need your advice folks.
I'm newly married. Before I married,I got a government teaching job in the east. My husband stays in Lagos but I stay in one of the states in the east. We got married in January this year and since then it's been difficult for us because of the distance. My husband is doing a good job in Lagos. I'm just afraid of relocating and staying idle at home,coupled with the fear of losing a government job that is pensionable. My friends and colleagues advised me to continue with my work and visit him during the holidays but some advised against such. I'm in a tight spot right now and don't want to take a decision I will end up regretting tomorrow. Please,your opinions are needed. Thanks.
My pastor use to say something, he will say, don't prepare for wrestling in the wrestling ring, you will be defeated.

This question you asked, does it mean that you just got that job after your wedding or before your wedding? Because this supposed to be one of the point of discussions with an agreed solution. You know it is a risk to keep distance in marriage. Check out the scripture on even couples embarking on fasting

1 Like

Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by wunmi590(m): 2:50pm On Mar 08
Zonefree:

Allow her to reach your level before advising her to quit.

Government job is a no no for you but you don reach level 10, waiting for 12. undecided

Don't mind him, after he has used government job and money to build up himself, he's now advising somebody to leave...

So that she can go and be a burding to the husband, they think Lagos is easy like that, nah when the woman enter, the husband go know say feeding pass feeding

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Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Irupetepete: 6:18pm On Mar 08
homelybabe:
Plz I need your advice folks.
I'm newly married. Before I married,I got a government teaching job in the east. My husband stays in Lagos but I stay in one of the states in the east. We got married in January this year and since then it's been difficult for us because of the distance. My husband is doing a good job in Lagos. I'm just afraid of relocating and staying idle at home,coupled with the fear of losing a government job that is pensionable. My friends and colleagues advised me to continue with my work and visit him during the holidays but some advised against such. I'm in a tight spot right now and don't want to take a decision I will end up regretting tomorrow. Please,your opinions are needed. Thanks.
can't you be transfered to Lagos?
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Ajione(m): 6:28pm On Mar 08
Dont bother to resign, you can do inter state transfer but you will lose one level. Make more enquiry on this
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Tjra: 6:58pm On Mar 08
Ajione:
Dont bother to resign, you can do inter state transfer but you will lose one level. Make more enquiry on this
It could be a state government job.
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by jesmond3945: 6:59pm On Mar 08
homelybabe:

Thanks but my State doesn't do Inter-State transfer
well try and get a job especially govt job in lagos to avoid see finish. Anything that would take you from the house would make your huaband happy. If your hubby set up biz for you, he always be on your matter. So salary employment is okay.

1 Like

Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by TYCO77: 7:11pm On Mar 08
[color=#000099][/color]
Zonefree:

Allow her to reach your level before advising her to quit.

Government job is a no no for you but you don reach level 10, waiting for 12. undecided

Government job, it's entitlement and level apart, it is in no way ideal for married couple to live apart. Even ordinary romantic friendship suffers as a result of long distance relationship. Aunt quickly relocate to live with your hubby.
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Jayboi(m): 8:12pm On Mar 08
Today, no govt job is pensionable. U shud know better. If it is job security u want then u are not ready for the challenge being a young lady. My advice is resign and join Ur husband. Dust Ur CV and start applying now. Better u both fight on the same front than two fronts. Govt job nowadays are next to nothing because the salary is just too small. Unless u are on grade level 12 and above, it's best you join Ur husband

1 Like

Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Tjra: 8:16pm On Mar 08
Relocate
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Xosh: 8:34pm On Mar 08
Nice2023:
I work in govt too...have u check the life and style of people in that office to know if what u are saying is true?
Government job doesn't guarantee a secure future except multiple stealing that goes in there.

I tell u for free...if ur salary isn't upto 150k minimum pls,go and join ur husband.

I have worked for 9years going to 10 and my pension has been terribly depleted,dwarfed and devalued and I have only found solace in my side income and about to quit the so called govt work.

It is easy to say that say that such jobs are pensionable but they don't guarantee the future...as most govt workers now owe online loan more than any group of people in Nigeria currently.

Finally,join ur husband and start a business in Lagos as soon as possible.

This is my opinion and not a final conclusion...maka indi uta.

Good luck to u.


I guess some ragtags must have bullied you to stop posting.
I do enjoy reading your threads,just so you know.
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by pocohantas(f): 8:59pm On Mar 08
homelybabe:
Plz I need your advice folks.
I'm newly married. Before I married,I got a government teaching job in the east. My husband stays in Lagos but I stay in one of the states in the east. We got married in January this year and since then it's been difficult for us because of the distance. My husband is doing a good job in Lagos. I'm just afraid of relocating and staying idle at home,coupled with the fear of losing a government job that is pensionable. My friends and colleagues advised me to continue with my work and visit him during the holidays but some advised against such. I'm in a tight spot right now and don't want to take a decision I will end up regretting tomorrow. Please,your opinions are needed. Thanks.

Relocate. But before you do, start applying for jobs in Lagos. 70k jobs are in Lagos. If you don't relocate, you guys would be running two households in Tinubu's economy. Can your <70k pay your rent in the SE without his support? Can it pay your transportation to go visit him without rigorous savings and provision? Or would that expense be on him? How often would these visits be?

If the option of redeployment is there, then you can explore that. If not, please relocate. You are still young and the world is yours to conquer.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by PastorOlokonla: 9:34pm On Mar 08
Xosh:

I guess some ragtags must have bullied you to stop posting.
I do enjoy reading your threads,just so you know.

Who are the "Rag-tags"?
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Proserpina: 9:34pm On Mar 08
.

1 Like

Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by pocohantas(f): 9:36pm On Mar 08
Proserpina:
Go and meet your husband


I won't type more than that grin

Na her sister in-law be this.
Nothing you fit tell me. grin
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by Proserpina: 9:49pm On Mar 08
.
Re: Should I Relocate And Stay With My Husband Or Should I Continue My Work? by pocohantas(f): 10:24pm On Mar 08
Proserpina:
No nah.... Tell me what's she doing in the east?

Eh eh eh

*Claps hands
Newly wed
How will they have babies?

You are right. They need to be together as newly weds. A job of less than 70k is not worth staying apart. If na 70k job she like, she fit find one supermarket for area in Lag amd work as manager. It is more challenging and mentally stimulating than govt job grin. I never knew there are young people there sef.

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