₦airaland Forum

Watching your kids destroyed thing's is a real "Woke Parenting"

"If my son is angry, he throws things at the TV, he has broken 3 TVs.
I don't advocate for beating children, let them be"

Bovi pic.twitter.com/TQpoCchDNj

— Dami’ Adenuga (@DAMIADENUGA) December 17, 2024

[quote author=Realtord43 post=133337653]Watching your kids destroyed thing's is a real "Woke Parenting"

"If my son is angry, he throws things at the TV, he has broken 3 TVs.
I don't advocate for beating children, let them be"

Bovi pic.twitter.com/TQpoCchDNj

— Dami’ Adenuga (@DAMIADENUGA) December 17, 2024

you not see the part he said ""thank God for capacity, if I couldn't afford another one the approach would have been different"

Bro is basically saying na poor parents dey beat kids

Melvyn11:
Did you not see the part he said ""thank God for capacity, if I couldn't afford another one the approach would have been different"

Bro is basically saying na poor parents dey beat kids

That still doesnt make sense even if you have the money.

What if the kid goes to a friends house and starts breaking their TV, or goes to shoprite and starts breaking their TV just because you dont want to correct him. Breaking TV can even put the child in danger

You dont have to flog the child but you can verbally scold and let the child know he is wrong
Actions in life have consequences and there is a reason they are children and we are adults so we can correct and set them straight

What else, he will say if the child attempt to open the car door on motion or drink boiling water he wont stop him?

Sometime all these wokeness we will just overdo everything sef

[quote author=Realtord43 post=133337653]Watching your kids destroyed thing's is a real "Woke Parenting"

"If my son is angry, he throws things at the TV, he has broken 3 TVs.
I don't advocate for beating children, let them be"

Bovi pic.twitter.com/TQpoCchDNj

— Dami’ Adenuga (@DAMIADENUGA) December 17, 2024

makes some sense regarding parents examining why they beat their kids, cause in most cases beating is like a shortcut and maybe lazy way to enforce discipline. There are parents that never beat their kids yet they turn out okay.

raumdeuter:
That still doesnt make sense even if you have the money.

What if the kid goes to a friends house and starts breaking their TV, or goes to shoprite and starts breaking their TV just because you dont want to correct him. Breaking TV can even put the child in danger

You dont have to flog the child but you can verbally scold and let the child know he is wrong
Actions in life have consequences and there is a reason they are children and we are adults so we can correct and set them straight

What else, he will say if the child attempt to open the car door on motion or drink boiling water he wont stop him?

Sometime all these wokeness we will just overdo everything sef

I want to believe there'd be more context to that part of him indulging a kid that smashes TVs sha...and na the snippet Dem share wey no cover am.

Even with context sef, which kin training dey give Pikin mind to break TV out of anger, something is def wrong with his parenting style.

raumdeuter:
That still doesnt make sense even if you have the money.

What if the kid goes to a friends house and starts breaking their TV, or goes to shoprite and starts breaking their TV just because you dont want to correct him. Breaking TV can even put the child in danger

You dont have to flog the child but you can verbally scold and let the child know he is wrong
Actions in life have consequences and there is a reason they are children and we are adults so we can correct and set them straight

What else, he will say if the child attempt to open the car door on motion or drink boiling water he wont stop him?

Sometime all these wokeness we will just overdo everything sef

In the full podcast he mentions flogging and disciplining his children. One stroke and then warning of ten if they repeat it.

Bombblacks:
The idea of karma was invented in an attempt to control the behaviour of the general population. Similar to the concept of Heaven and Hell .

There's no difference. They all are human invention to control people.

Theflint1:
He makes some sense regarding parents examining why they beat their kids, cause in most cases beating is like a shortcut and maybe lazy way to enforce discipline. There are parents that never beat their kids yet they turn out okay.

I thought about what he said but beating them could mean they don't get another chance to frustrate you.

If Bovi was planning to sell the first TV to pay the child's school fees and he broke it, I can assure you he won't have broken another.

Melvyn11:
Did you not see the part he said ""thank God for capacity, if I couldn't afford another one the approach would have been different"

Bro is basically saying na poor parents dey beat kids

So because you can afford another one, you let your kids destroyed your TV because the are angry?

What will they destroy when the are adults. He should have let his kid destroyed his car too

raumdeuter:
That still doesnt make sense even if you have the money.

What if the kid goes to a friends house and starts breaking their TV, or goes to shoprite and starts breaking their TV just because you dont want to correct him. Breaking TV can even put the child in danger

You dont have to flog the child but you can verbally scold and let the child know he is wrong
Actions in life have consequences and there is a reason they are children and we are adults so we can correct and set them straight

What else, he will say if the child attempt to open the car door on motion or drink boiling water he wont stop him?

Sometime all these wokeness we will just overdo everything sef

Woke Parenting will be the end of this Generation

Theflint1:
He makes some sense regarding parents examining why they beat their kids, cause in most cases beating is like a shortcut and maybe lazy way to enforce discipline. There are parents that never beat their kids yet they turn out okay.

He must not beat the kid but he should not watch kid destroying properties because they are angry. He is not helping that child in anyway

Itsrm:
I thought about what he said but beating them could mean they don't get another chance to frustrate you.

If Bovi was planning to sell the first TV to pay the child's school fees and he broke it, I can assure you he won't have broken another.

That he's tying the way he chooses to enforce discipline to his financial standing is the part I have issue with the most, and that's probably why his kid is breaking TVs in anger.

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Betting companies have been instructed to (must) update their software to withhold the correct amount from winnings before the effective date of 1 January 2025.

They are coming for Forex and crypto too soon,APC are out for blood...

Realtord43:
So because you can afford another one, you let your kids destroyed your TV because the are angry?

What will they destroy when the are adults. He should have let his kid destroyed his car too

He told you when the child came of age he realized his mistakes and stopped doing that. Did you even watch the video you posted here? Bovi is simply telling you he's not going to beat his child over material things he can afford. You don't have to agree with him.

Obafemi just dey cap. Bro said he was faster than Walker, Mbappe, Sane, Bale etc

If you kids don’t know about Obafemi, get to know pic.twitter.com/CjIXNgOVSV

— Kendall Rowan (@kendallrowanx) December 16, 2024

[quote author=Melvyn11 post=133340507]Obafemi just dey cap. Bro said he was faster than Walker, Mbappe, Sane, Bale etc

If you kids don’t know about Obafemi, get to know pic.twitter.com/CjIXNgOVSV

— Kendall Rowan (@kendallrowanx) December 16, 2024

you watch him when he was at inter Milan

[quote author=Melvyn11 post=133340507]Obafemi just dey cap. Bro said he was faster than Walker, Mbappe, Sane, Bale etc

If you kids don’t know about Obafemi, get to know pic.twitter.com/CjIXNgOVSV

— Kendall Rowan (@kendallrowanx) December 16, 2024

faster than Sane

Walker, Mbappe and Bale is debatable

When he said even R9 knows he's faster, he wasn't joking cos they spent one year together at Inter

Only Tijani is clear of Martins on eye test, the others he mentioned will require stopwatch to test it

Theflint1:
I want to believe there'd be more context to that part of him indulging a kid that smashes TVs sha...and na the snippet Dem share wey no cover am.

Even with context sef, which kin training dey give Pikin mind to break TV out of anger, something is def wrong with his parenting style.

Irrespective of the context, breaking TVs as a reaction to a trigger that causes anger is concerning because it is an extreme/ excessive response. That reaction is over the baseline and abnormal. I am speaking from a human behavior (clinical) standpoint.

This isn’t about beating a child or being rich enough to afford replacements. His kids are communicating serious deficits in emotional regulation and I hope Bovi has addressed it.

Roland17:
Irrespective of the context, breaking TVs as a reaction to a trigger that causes anger is concerning because it is an extreme/ excessive response. That reaction is over the baseline and abnormal. I am speaking from a human behavior (clinical) standpoint.

This isn’t about beating a child or being rich enough to afford replacements. His kids are communicating serious deficits in emotional regulation and I hope Bovi has addressed it.

Is beating a good way of correcting lack of emotional regulation? If not, what would you suggest?

I'm a big believer in flogging when it has effect. But flogging does not regulate some children. I was one of those. I can take cane all day so it was never a corrective action for me. I rather my pale flog me than shout at me in those days.

The way Nigerian delegation at CAF awards mocked Hakimis delegation storm out was funny

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DDp9zK2oF9s/?igsh=cWM5dXVkNDAwYTM3

TemporaryHansel:
Na see finish go make stranger konk you for bus sha. Like wtf? The woman don look okpa from head to toe say who be this bagger,

Ibime:
Definitely faster than Sane

Walker, Mbappe and Bale is debatable

When he said even R9 knows he's faster, he wasn't joking cos they spent one year together at Inter

Only Tijani is clear of Martins on eye test, the others he mentioned will require stopwatch to test it

Ahmed Musa nko?

TemporaryHansel:
Na see finish go make stranger konk you for bus sha. Like wtf? The woman don look okpa from head to toe say who be this bagger,

https://www.nairaland.com/8295423/remember-bolekaja-molue-era-transportation
I just finished reading this post and I saw this especially that molue part , Make e nor go be inside molue this incident happen 😂

Roland17:
Irrespective of the context, breaking TVs as a reaction to a trigger that causes anger is concerning because it is an extreme/ excessive response. That reaction is over the baseline and abnormal. I am speaking from a human behavior (clinical) standpoint.

This isn’t about beating a child or being rich enough to afford replacements. His kids are communicating serious deficits in emotional regulation and I hope Bovi has addressed it.

Probably it's something his kids have seen him do, which creates an emotional baseline, and in a bid to not be hypocritical he's normalizing that sort of lash out.

Theflint1:
Ahmed Musa nko?

2011 to 2015 Musa also came to mind but we will also need stopwatch for that

Makamatic:
https://www.nairaland.com/8295423/remember-bolekaja-molue-era-transportation
I just finished reading this post and I saw this especially that molue part , Make e nor go be inside molue this incident happen 😂

If na even Molue e happen e go even good, in all of the molue madness, you're bound to meet some overzealous characters that'd try something like that.

Okpa's koncking experience was in the slow and calm streets of Nsukka.

Mbappe is faster than Henry BTW

R9 was not that fast to put him in Mbappe speed levels

But R9 and Henry are made to look faster than they are because they were the best at running with the ball at speed. Many people have speed but few can do it with the ball at feet

Dennis Bergkamp was faster in Arsenal preseason sprint tests than Henry and was the fastest Arsenal player, he won it every year till about 2002. Check the record books. However Bergkamp style was never to run with the ball at speed, he played more conventional CAM style football than wingplay

Ibime:
Is beating a good way of correcting lack of emotional regulation? If not, what would you suggest?

I'm a big believer in flogging when it has effect. But flogging does not regulate some children. I was one of those. I can take cane all day so it was never a corrective action for me. I rather my pale flog me than shout at me in those days.

There are developmental milestones every child achieves as they age. Those milestones are typically physiological, biological, intellectual/ cognitive. When there is a deficit in any of the aspects listed, then we need to ask why?

Flogging doesn’t correct a deficit in emotional regulation. When you flog, you are not beating a child’s inability to properly regulate their emotions, rather, you are beating the child’s response to their inability to properly regulate their emotions. In this instance the response is anger or other maladaptive behaviors. Beating may suppress anger which is the response but it will not resolve the deficit in emotional regulation. Remember I said suppress anger, not resolve anger.

The process of developing proper emotional regulation takes a lifetime but usually starts at 2 when kids start to explore the different emotions they are feeling. That is the best time to help children learn proper emotional regulation. Helping them understand emotions like crying, smiling, anger, confusion, excitment etc makes the foundation strong. Redirect inappropriate responses immediately and consistently at this age. Encourage them to use their words. Also, their environment remains the biggest factor of influence. What surrounds the child? What is the child seeing? What they see informs how they interpret certain emotions.

Every disciplinary approach has the ability to have the same effect. The most important thing is the intention behind discipline and ensuring the approach/ choice of discipline matches the situation. Also, what are your own emotions when you are disciplining your child? Do adults mix their own frustrations with life when they discipline their children? For me, it has to be a combination and knowing what is effective and how to use it. Also, being flexible with approach.

If my child breaks TV as response to anger, e go collect before we dive into “why”? I am quite traditional but I also know my growing up is different from today. Know what your child responds to and that is effective and be flexible enough to explore options. Also, ensure discipline is age appropriate before you tempt a teenage son to handle you.. I have always said, my children will earn my friendship when they grow but until then I will parent.

Theflint1:
Probably it's something his kids have seen him do, which creates an emotional baseline, and in a bid to not be hypocritical he's normalizing that sort of lash out.

Most definitely. You will read in my reply to Ibime that the biggest factor that influences any human behavior, particularly children, is the immediate environment. This is because the immediate environment reinforces behaviors faster than any other influence.

I don’t know Bovi’s family dynamics enough to speak conclusively but it does seem like that type of response was normalized even though it is outside the norm. Another thing that caught my attention is that he said “kids”…not 1 kid but plural. That means it is a learned behavior influenced by their environment that has been normalized.

Again, I hope those issues have been addressed as he said.

Roland17:
There are developmental milestones every child achieves as they age. Those milestones are typically physiological, biological, intellectual/ cognitive. When there is a deficit in any of the aspects listed, then we need to ask why?

Flogging doesn’t correct a deficit in emotional regulation. When you flog, you are not beating a child’s inability to properly regulate their emotions, rather, you are beating the child’s response to their inability to properly regulate their emotions. In this instance the response is anger or other maladaptive behaviors. Beating may suppress anger which is the response but it will not resolve the deficit in emotional regulation. Remember I said suppress anger, not resolve anger.

The process of developing proper emotional regulation, is a lifetime but usually starts at 2 when kids start to explore the different emotions they are feeling. That is the best time to help children learn proper emotional regulation. Helping them understand emotions like crying, smiling, anger, confused etc makes the foundation strong. Redirect inappropriate responses immediately and consistently at this age. Encourage them to use their words. Also, their environment remains the biggest factor of influence. What surrounds the child? What is the child seeing? What they see informs how they interpret certain emotions.

Every disciplinary approach has the ability to have the same effect. The most important thing is the intention behind discipline and ensuring the approach/ choice of discipline matches the situation. Also, what are your own emotions when you are disciplining your child? Do adults mix their own frustrations with life when they discipline their children? For me, it has to be a combination and knowing what is effective and how to use it. Also, being flexible with approach.

If my child breaks TV as response to anger, e go collect before we dive into “why”? I am quite traditional but I also know my growing up is different from today. Know what your child responds to and that is effective and be flexible enough to explore options. Also, ensure discipline is age appropriate before your tempt a teenage son to handle you.. I have always said, my children will earn my friendship when they grow but until then I will parent.

Nice one Baba. Be like you be professional for these matters.

Roland17:
There are developmental milestones every child achieves as they age. Those milestones are typically physiological, biological, intellectual/ cognitive. When there is a deficit in any of the aspects listed, then we need to ask why?

Flogging doesn’t correct a deficit in emotional regulation. When you flog, you are not beating a child’s inability to properly regulate their emotions, rather, you are beating the child’s response to their inability to properly regulate their emotions. In this instance the response is anger or other maladaptive behaviors. Beating may suppress anger which is the response but it will not resolve the deficit in emotional regulation. Remember I said suppress anger, not resolve anger.

The process of developing proper emotional regulation, is a lifetime but usually starts at 2 when kids start to explore the different emotions they are feeling. That is the best time to help children learn proper emotional regulation. Helping them understand emotions like crying, smiling, anger, confused etc makes the foundation strong. Redirect inappropriate responses immediately and consistently at this age. Encourage them to use their words. Also, their environment remains the biggest factor of influence. What surrounds the child? What is the child seeing? What they see informs how they interpret certain emotions.

Every disciplinary approach has the ability to have the same effect. The most important thing is the intention behind discipline and ensuring the approach/ choice of discipline matches the situation. Also, what are your own emotions when you are disciplining your child? Do adults mix their own frustrations with life when they discipline their children? For me, it has to be a combination and knowing what is effective and how to use it. Also, being flexible with approach.

If my child breaks TV as response to anger, e go collect before we dive into “why”? I am quite traditional but I also know my growing up is different from today. Know what your child responds to and that is effective and be flexible enough to explore options. Also, ensure discipline is age appropriate before your tempt a teenage son to handle you.. I have always said, my children will earn my friendship when they grow but until then I will parent.

Effiko! Lai wowe.

If i write this one at PhD level dem go tink say i carry expo enter exam hall. See as you break am down physically and metaphysically.

Ibime:
Nice one Baba. Be like you be professional for these matters.

Yes sir, na my professional background be that and even though we don dive into more lucrative aspects of healthcare, I still dey in touch and maintain relevant certifications/ licenses.