₦airaland Forum

MOG6670:
Hello nairafam
Pls I need your advice.....

This writeup is sections one and two .

👉long read 👈
( SECTION ONE: parental bullying/standing as an obstacle towards child personal growth and development)

I'm a guy of 25yr from and average family of 10 Members which I'm the first born.
My parents are religion leaders (pastor) which made it difficult for us to to effectively socialise, build network and have a healthy self image due to high level of emotional and verbal bullying which they termed as discipline and protection ( must pastor lads can relate to this).

I decided to further my education when I graduated ( national diploma) in 2022 but my parents refused to cooperate which in they words "NOT EVERY CHILD GOT THE OPPORTUNITY I HAD, SO I SHOULD BE THANKING GOD"

Mind you we the children are the major source of income because we are originally farmers.
We, the children are the one who sacrificed our our blood, sweat strength and enjoyment to makes sure that we have enough as a family ( especially me the first born) but Alas the thing has turned against us because our parents always bully ( financially bullying)us whenever we refuse to coperates with they selfish goals. ( Many things to say, but that's for another day)

That's makes me to made a harsh and hard decision in 2023, that's to break free from them even though I had no any tangible things to my name to fall back on incase of.......( because all our harvest are sold and invested in our father name, and he will never coperates or give you cash to invest it personally or build yourself as individual)

I break out with only 50k in 2023 and today 2025 my total investment and asset is 2.5 million Naira and still growing... ( My financial projection and goals this year is to worth 10+ million Naira, and thank God it's working)[/color]

Section Two ::::

Section two is about my love life. I had fallen in love last year with a very beautiful, natural & sincere lady, who her good character is top-notch, wife material. This lady is 23 and I'm 25.

In the course of discussion last Month, she stylishly told me that she wanted ( if God permits) to be married at least by 2027.

And to be sincere, I wanted to wife her but one of the issue is that she didn't attend any forms of traditional education (school) but she is intellectual wise, resourcesfullness and industrious.

So I need your sincere in put in both section 1&2 because it'll help me to make a good decision.

Summary::
From part one
-----------------------
-Those of you who hard and experienced these kind of parents, how did you navigate through?
-Is your relationship with them now good or strained?
-Did you regret your action or not?


From part two:
_______________
-What is your experience/ or take on marrying uneducated but exposed wife?
-Did she later learnt how to read and right?
-If the need arise, what are the ways and forms did I need in other to teach her how to read and write

Telltruth123:
I have the same experience with you, it really affected me, as a lady before I got married my parents would manipulate me and collect money from me no savings now I know they are after their own, they will not assist me financially even when they have the means.
As for uneducated partner, I married one and I am regretting it because since we got married, he has never called my children to check their books in the beginning of our relationship, he promised to get educated but he did not keep to his promise, yesterday my daughter was telling him that the JAMB form will soon close, he told her that if she did not collect it this year, she will collect it next year, he said this same thing to the junior sister that want to do BECE, everything falls on me, he doesn't value education.
You can give your girlfriend a year or two to see how she has improved on her education then you will make your decision because she will be the one to monitor the children assignment.

MOG6670:
Hello nairafam
Pls I need your advice.....

This writeup is sections one and two .

👉long read 👈
( SECTION ONE: parental bullying/standing as an obstacle towards child personal growth and development)

I'm a guy of 25yr from and average family of 10 Members which I'm the first born.
My parents are religion leaders (pastor) which made it difficult for us to to effectively socialise, build network and have a healthy self image due to high level of emotional and verbal bullying which they termed as discipline and protection ( must pastor lads can relate to this).

I decided to further my education when I graduated ( national diploma) in 2022 but my parents refused to cooperate which in they words "NOT EVERY CHILD GOT THE OPPORTUNITY I HAD, SO I SHOULD BE THANKING GOD"

Mind you we the children are the major source of income because we are originally farmers.
We, the children are the one who sacrificed our our blood, sweat strength and enjoyment to makes sure that we have enough as a family ( especially me the first born) but Alas the thing has turned against us because our parents always bully ( financially bullying)us whenever we refuse to coperates with they selfish goals. ( Many things to say, but that's for another day)

That's makes me to made a harsh and hard decision in 2023, that's to break free from them even though I had no any tangible things to my name to fall back on incase of.......( because all our harvest are sold and invested in our father name, and he will never coperates or give you cash to invest it personally or build yourself as individual)

I break out with only 50k in 2023 and today 2025 my total investment and asset is 2.5 million Naira and still growing... ( My financial projection and goals this year is to worth 10+ million Naira, and thank God it's working)[/color]

Section Two ::::

Section two is about my love life. I had fallen in love last year with a very beautiful, natural & sincere lady, who her good character is top-notch, wife material. This lady is 23 and I'm 25.

In the course of discussion last Month, she stylishly told me that she wanted ( if God permits) to be married at least by 2027.

And to be sincere, I wanted to wife her but one of the issue is that she didn't attend any forms of traditional education (school) but she is intellectual wise, resourcesfullness and industrious.

So I need your sincere in put in both section 1&2 because it'll help me to make a good decision.

Summary::
From part one
-----------------------
-Those of you who hard and experienced these kind of parents, how did you navigate through?
-Is your relationship with them now good or strained?
-Did you regret your action or not?


From part two:
_______________
-What is your experience/ or take on marrying uneducated but exposed wife?
-Did she later learnt how to read and right?
-If the need arise, what are the ways and forms did I need in other to teach her how to read and write

frozen70:
Your part one decision was the right step taken and you did well

👉Thank you sir[/color]

For part two, since she wasn't educated but civil, I think she has to enrol for classes in art subjects so that she can register for waec and NECO, I choose waec and NECO because the marking scheme is easier than GCE exams
👉Ok I'll try this. But she'll not agree /happy to attend traditional school, I think she'd likely to accept personal lesson teachers ( at home) because she's deeply involved in her fashion and agric chain of business. But I'll suggest it to her[color=#990000]

Thank you . Your input is helpful

So find a private secondary school and register her for the next session of exams

Once she has decided to get married at 27yrs she can get her papers, then you register her for Jamb and she will go for Jamb classes and get admission in university then marry her and she will continue to bear your name from waec to university and still carry your pregnancy

You are educating her for the sake of your children whom she has to be with all the time

Telltruth123:
I have the same experience with you, it really affected me, as a lady before I got married my parents would manipulate me and collect money from me no savings now I know they are after their own, they will not assist me financially even when they have the means.
As for uneducated partner, I married one and I am regretting it because since we got married, he has never called my children to check their books in the beginning of our relationship, he promised to get educated but he did not keep to his promise, yesterday my daughter was telling him that the JAMB form will soon close, he told her that if she did not collect it this year, she will collect it next year, he said this same thing to the junior sister that want to do BECE, everything falls on me, he doesn't value education.
You can give your girlfriend a year or two to see how she has improved on her education then you will make your decision because she will be the one to monitor the children assignment.

MOG6670:
Ayah let keeps our head up
God is our strength

pocohantas:
What does she do and what does she plan doing until you come marry her in 2027?


I saw a video yesterday and the lady said "don't marry for potential". If he has 100k today, if she uneducated today - marry him/her for that and be ready to live with it if nothing changes. If she doesn't get formally educated, please keep loving her.

As for your parents, you are on the right track. Everybody would adjust eventually.