₦airaland Forum

lanresz:
Only 3? I have stopped counting. I'm married to a Nigerian and we met in Canada.

Do you mind sharing your experience ?

How you met ? How it's going ? Would you do it again ? And experiences of others that you know. Merci

maternal:
Only my cousin in Texas. It's actually a she. She demanded the now husband get his green card before talking to her. She's the only person I know who did it. I know some guys in Canada who did it for "alternative reasons" but they don't count. But for a legit marriage ? Haven't seen one in my generation. I also was thinking hard before replying.

But honestly, it is going to be so weird for it to be so rare that no such marriage exists. So, I was surprised at your reply. Such marriages exist. What we should be interested in is the prevalence. That is, do a high number of Black women (born and bred) in Canada marry Black men (regardless of their birth origins)? Do Black women born outside Canada also do the same (when they moved to Canada)? At what rate?

I've been discussing this issue for years. It's very complex. It's not black and white. My direct family is part of this conversation. But I'll keep certain explanation to myself. People here will accuse me of being bitter and angry if they don't agree with my life experiences. Lastly, naija men abroad are in extremely high demand. Thanks to the burna boys shipping the "culture" and music abroad. Then Nollywood of course. Being with a naija man is the thing to do if you're a black woman nowadays

Interesting, and nice to see. I believe that notwithstanding poor governance and poverty, globally, Nigerian men rank very high in desirability amongst Black women. Second only to African Americans. If we were prosperous, I believe we could have surpassed them.

Based on the bold, what about Nigerian women in the abroad? What is the demand like?

Thank you.

Taal17:
Actually 30 is a good age to freeze eggs

Egg reserve starts to drop from puberty and a more significant drop is typically from 35yrs till menopause which can be up to 60s.

Good then. At the end of the day, those who marry late should focus on having fewer children - max two kids. The era of three children should be coming to a close.

Gerrard59:
Good then. At the end of the day, those who marry late should focus on having fewer children - max two kids. The era of three children should be coming to a close.

It's a choice (if anyone can afford it).
Ask Elumelu

My experience has been very great. We have been married for over 15 years now. I came as an international student, she came as a pr. I was a pr before we met.

I know many that marry before and after me that are still together and going strong. I know some that have dabaru it for whatever reasons.

olalekan9320:
Do you mind sharing your experience ?

How you met ? How it's going ? Would you do it again ? And experiences of others that you know. Merci

Ontarioo:
It's a choice (if anyone can afford it).
Ask Elumelu

Elumelu wanted male children and he was already a bank executive.

jedisco:
Lol... were you part of team foriegn girls before you japa?


E be like say na UK folks full here

No, na Nigeria girls dey run once they smell you be JJC. It's very complicated

Gerrard59:
This is a fact I hope many of our men who run their mouths on social about being #TeamForeignWomen realise. Humans are tribal and would always prefer to marry their kinds. I think a major part of the ignorance stems from those in Nigeria who believe it is that easy for someone who spent at least 25 years in a particular society to quickly move on to marry someone from a different race and cultural upbringing. Even for the same race, but different cultural upbringing, it is hard let alone a different race.

As you stated, since the numbers have ballooned over the years, marrying one's kind is easier compared to those who live in countries with few black people.

In summary, humans are tribal.


Not surprised. It is usually harder for immigrant women to marry outside their race compared to immigrant men. Also, they have it tough since there is an existing Black British female population. So the competition for attraction is fierce. I wonder what it is like in Canada. Abi dem go marry Indians and create minii-Trinidads?


They should embrace single-hood. No be everybody go marry. It is the new cultural dispensation.

I have A VERY CONTROVERSIAL VIEW when it comes to this topic

I'll be back to share it when I'm more settled

ednut1:
😆

lmao

Gerrard59:
You mean to tell me you don't know a single Nigerian man who holds PR at least, that is married to a Nigerian woman who already resides in Canada?

Truth is: Nigerians will marry themselves. Who wan marry us before? Nigeriens? Liberians? Indians? We would marry ourselves.

Dey play lol

RodgersAkpafu:
I have A VERY CONTROVERSIAL VIEW when it comes to this topic

I'll be back to share it when I'm more settled

Right
So lemme just pour in the scattered thoughts as it comes to my head


First, i think I'm gonna lean towards Maternal on this one. Our women are not nice to us out here and that's the truth, except you wanna lie to yourself.

Second, Jedisco is right about how difficult it may be for (relatively) new Nigerian migrants to get with women from other groups of people
especially if you are from the Nigerian trench
If you went to an international school in Nigeria (like I have seen in my own experiences), dealing with such vicissitudes decline dramatically.

However, like I always tell men, go to where you are treated best. A lot of these women are giving headaches (well I am talking of the UK 🇬🇧 anyways) so men are trying their luck elsewhere

Just please please and please
do not pedestalise these women
that is the major reason why I believe these relationships often do not happen at all, or crash and burn shortly afterwards.

So everything I'm gonna say subsequently is based on my own views and it's okay to refute

1. A lot of black brits girls look at, and treat Nigerian and african migrants as "wild animals"
Esp if you are still trying to "sort yourselves out"
I have received quite a number of complaints from fellow Nigerians brothers

2. Black British boys are carrying anything and everything
In my uni, I have seen black on Chinese, black on white (most common for inter) even black on Indian
These young boys are running riot

3. If you are someone whose life is well put together and you are properly socialised, you can always get someone

4. As a consequence of this, again, the Nigerian men in my circle are trying all sorts, with some of them already married to these babes

5. Outside London, the. hype about black BBC is not as high as people in Nigeria think it is. It's in existence that's for sure, but there is a FUNDAMENTAL difference between BBC of Black Brit and BBC of Black immigrant
So Nigerians in Nigeria, despite both groups being black, our social standing is NOT THE SAME.

6. Going to Nigeria to go pick a woman is often times not the best play to have. I have seen this go south again and again and again to know that it's a high risk game that a "guy man" should rather not play.
Unless u have known the woman to al degree before you fled naija

7. Indians in particular and Sourh Asians in general have less of this problem because they are more nice. to each other than we are as Nigerians /Black ppl


PS. I have a thing for Pakistani girls
That's where I have camped now
Easier to deal with than my compatriots

There is so much to say on the topic
And the ideas are all over my head
So lemme just put a full stop to it here

If #TeamForeign. is your team

There is nothing wrong with it
The younger you were when you came here, the better for you.
You want what you want and you shouldn't care what others think about it, nor should you be shamed for it..

Just don't pedestalise the women when you are interacting with them, and keep your options wide open.
The chick for u might be a slender babe from Myanmar 🇲🇲
Or a heavy ikebe Albanian
Or a "wicked" Latina babe

Widen your options
Nigerian and White women are not the only women in the world, and I reckon these are the two groups most Nigerian men are chasing

More and more Nigerian men are exploring that option, and like that nomad capitalist will always say.... "Go where (you think) you will be treated best

Work on yourself
Work on your accent (speak better)
Look and smell good (be well put together)
And learn conversational skills...

You go dey alright

Peace ✌️

I agree!! The most beautiful Nigerian ladies are still back home. I would even add that the "well behaved" are still back home. But, Nigerian ladies makes things so difficult.

Before I traveled, I tried to at least, establish a serious relationship with this lady. I didn't tell her I was processing my travel plans. She kept on rebuffing my shots. Now, she's interested for obvious reason.

When I see guys on Twitter talk about getting a foreign woman, I just smile and assume they haven't traveled yet. It's not so straightforward. The first lady that had a crush on me here was an Indian. But she's Hindu, and has a very traditional family. It's not so straightforward as people make it to seem.

I would prefer a Nigerian, but my options are wide open. My high school female friend is getting married to a Naija guy based in Nova Scotia, so guys are still going back home even though the visa processing wait time worries me.

For me, right now, I'm friends with a Nigerian young lady on Asylum. We are from different tribes and I guess it's a reason she isn't too keen yet, coupled with difference in economic stability because she's working and I'm not. But I don't want my choice to be forced because of constraints around me.

For the South Asians, it's easier for them because they don't do the mental gymnastics we do when falling in love. I have so many Indian course mates who are hoping to bring their bfs and husbands over.

lanresz:
My experience has been very great. We have been married for over 15 years now. I came as an international student, she came as a pr. I was a pr before we met.

I know many that marry before and after me that are still together and going strong. I know some that have dabaru it for whatever reasons.

That's great to know

olalekan9320:
That's great to know

PR vs PR is not a problem. The issue is when you come in on a visit visa or study visa and you want to marry a PR or CC when the latter is esp a female.

ednut1:
we are not the same mentally or socially. Men are usually able to bounce back and remarry than women especially when kids are involved .

Hi Ed,
Off the cuff, please do you know if Canada has a replica of the US SBA loan, that can be used to purchase a business?

I have seen this happening as well. The husband graduated from masters programme just before they got married. They have been married for over 12 years now and still together.

aestake:
PR vs PR is not a problem. The issue is when you come in on a visit visa or study visa and you want to marry a PR or CC when the latter is esp a female.

lanresz:
I have seen this happening as well. The husband graduated from masters programme just before they got married. They have been married for over 12 years now and still together.

Ok. It should be encouraged with cautions.

Just like everything we do in life.

aestake:
Ok. It should be encouraged with cautions.

jedisco:
Hehe.. if you ask why, dem go say na BBC. It's blokes who've not left 9ja though- you no go blame them.
On arrival, dem go understand- accent first, then you talk of life experiences- when folks are talking places they've gone on vac to, guy go dey look. Food nko- on a quick break when folks are asking for different flavours of coffee e.t.c, or in a restaurant, chap would be looking at the menu like it was written in Arabic. I never mention fork and knife wahala. Activities/sports nko- we na mainly football. No talk of swimming, kayaking, camping, skiing e.t.c. Then the elephant in the room which is economic capability. People do date across borders but there's no one there queuing up for us because of BBC.

Many blokes/ladies would be single finally. At least as a bloke, if you old reach, u fit enter 9ja, infact relatives would help.
One met a medic who was 29- told me her plan was to freeze her eggs once she crosses 30. I told her e never reach.. she should search harder.
Finally, I always wonder but ut seems our physically beautiful ladies still dey 9ja- maybe why folks still go back. Anytime I enter 9ja na so so fine babes I dey see.

'scus me. what is BBC? make my mind no go another tin

legionISproteus:
'scus me. what is BBC? make my mind no go another tin

A male fowl that is big and black

Taal17:
Since he was born abroad.

Just do the NIN and passport in Nigeria with the names you want . Is this name change inclusive of surname?

Yes, surname is inclusive. He also has two middle names on his Canadian birth certificate and passport. I'm realizing now that he cannot have two middle names on his NIN or Nigerian passport.

legionISproteus:
'scus me. what is BBC? make my mind no go another tin

British Broadcasting Corporation.

Yes, its that thing you're thinking.

Hi guys.. I hope you’re all doing well.

Please I’m considering moving from Quebec to New Brunswick. I don’t know much about NB. Sounds crazy but I also don’t know anyone there😂, not a soul. I need any type of help I can get. Not financial help nor someone to accommodate me. I mean tips, advice, more information about the job market, cost of living, the environment. Anything anyone is willing to share. Please if staying in NB or have lived there before any information or knowledge you share will be helpful. Thanks in advance 🫂

Hello everyone,

I would like to know what life's like living in Thunderbay, Ontario as a PR? I have read that the cost of living is quite affordable.
What about job opportunities? Commute systems? community lifestyle? there seems to be very little information about the city.
I'll appreciate if I can get more first hand experience information.

Thank you.

aestake:
PR vs PR is not a problem. The issue is when you come in on a visit visa or study visa and you want to marry a PR or CC when the latter is esp a female.

I can't blame them though, a friend of mine is in a relationship with a lady and it seems they love each other, but her visa would be expiring soon and now he is in dilemma and asking for my opinion and what I think about marrying her

olalekan9320:
I can't blame them though, a friend of mine is in a relationship with a lady and it seems they love each other, but her visa would be expiring soon and now he is in dilemma and asking for my opinion and what I think about marrying her

Most people are like a chicken who forgets who helped in plucking its tail during the raining season.

Hi, please I need some help. I've been trying to book appointment date with the passport office in Ottawa to renew my passport, but the website keeps stopping when it gets to payment. Has anyone experienced this or has anyone renewed their passport recently? Any help is appreciated. Thank you!

olalekan9320:
I can't blame them though, a friend of mine is in a relationship with a lady and it seems they love each other, but her visa would be expiring soon and now he is in dilemma and asking for my opinion and what I think about marrying her

Question is would he have considered marrying her if her visa had not expired.

No one should put themselves under emotional pressure

Kaycee20878:
Hi guys.. I hope you’re all doing well.

Please I’m considering moving from Quebec to New Brunswick. I don’t know much about NB. Sounds crazy but I also don’t know anyone there😂, not a soul. I need any type of help I can get. Not financial help nor someone to accommodate me. I mean tips, advice, more information about the job market, cost of living, the environment. Anything anyone is willing to share. Please if staying in NB or have lived there before any information or knowledge you share will be helpful. Thanks in advance 🫂

Why are you considering this move? I.e what matters to you
That background should help fine tune what advise you get

Interesting.. the tit for tat continues.

BOC has also effected its 7th consecutive rate cut - hoping this would stimulate the economy and calm the falling housing market


Mark Carney is someone who'd stimulate confidence leading the country through a period of uncertainty

jedisco:
Why are you considering this move? I.e what matters to you
That background should help fine tune what advise you get

Thanks for your response.

I want to move Cos they clearly telling us if you’re not bilingual we don’t want you here no more. Like about two years back they’re a lil bit nice with it. But now it’s getting really bad. Just feels like they’re just closing in on it. To get a most jobs now requires French.