₦airaland Forum

Chram:
Amen. Thank you Sir. The man isn't a native doctor and not diabolical at all.

Then call your stepdad and say hi

You own it to your siblings to work hard and smart, succeed and help them through.

She has every right to remarry to the person of her choice. Would you be happier if you are called one day that some village women are fighting with your mum for sleeping with their husband(s)? I can imagine how you feel but life must go on. Your siblings will be fine, las las.

Man up and support your mum for her happiness.

Chram:
I write with Pains in my heart.
I wish to ask God why some certain events occur in life.
I have lots of questions to ask, but nobody to give me answers.

I describe as Selfish, inconsiderate and egoistical the decision of my mum to remarry.

So, I lost my lovely and caring dad six years ago. We had lived in Port Harcourt prior to his death. When we were traveling to the village, we packed all the little properties we had cos we were not going to return back to PH again since my mum would not be able to cater for myself and little siblings.
After the burial and funeral ceremony, we all stayed in the village. I mean a typical village where there's no good road, no electricity, no mobile network. I stayed for a few months, then left them to go squat with my friends in port Harcourt so I could hustle with my muscles and return back to sch at least because it had always been my dad's desire for all of us to go to sch, so I beat my chest and vowed that I would go to sch and graduate. Thank God, I'm done with sch now.

My current challenge now is my mum is in her mid forties and wants to remarry to a man in the village. She hasn't told me yet. But my paternal aunt called to inform me. I'm really worried because if she gets remarried, she will abandon my younger siblings who are there with her because she won't be allowed to take my siblings to her new husband's house as it is an abomination based on the customs and traditions of our place. If my siblings must live with her in that place, then they will have to start bearing the new husband's name as his children. Why ?

Also, as a male child, I'm not allowed to go visit here and eat or sleep over in her new house. If I do this, I might die. Why is this?

Based on reports, my grandfather(mum's dad) is the one mounting pressure on my mum to get married. I'm really worried about the whole situation because the ties between my mum and my siblings are about to be severed. Since my dad died, my mum has been living in her father's house instead of my dad's place. Though both places aren't far from each other. Its trekkable. I feel really hurt and betrayed, I can't even imagine my mum in the arms of another man. If I was stable in monetary and economic terms, I would have taken her out of that dungeon to come live with me, and also bring siblings along. I'm really pained as I type. Tears.. my dad died at age 47.

I wish u guys can beg my mum not to remarry please. What's the difference between me and someone from a Broken background?
Life is not fair to me and my siblings. Not fair at all. I know how I'm feeling right now.

Let me make it clear at this point that if her plans of remarrying goes through, I will dis-mother her. I'll cut all ties and destroy every bond that ever existed between herself and us the children.

File photo used for illustration

Stop taking drugs
Ok
She can only make that decision not you.
U talk like a pikin.
With it without her life goes on

Well, the reason you're bitter and troubled by your mum's God - approved decision to remarry is down to ignorance ( you think it's wrong for her seek a man again), and selfishness. Yes, selfishness. Because you're thinking about life without her but you don't care what she goes through being alone. God originally made a woman for man. And so God intructs young widows like your mum to remarry ( 1 Timothy 5: 11 to 14). Why do you want this young woman to stay alone, lonely, for the rest of her life? If it were your mum you lost instead and your dad goes for another wife would you object? Not likely.

But your so called tradition , as you claimed, is a problem here. Your mum remarrying doesn't mean she's leaving you. Your tender siblings could live with her in the new husband's house till they grow. But you say your "tradition" forbids this. Why?
So, young man, your mum has done well to endure 6 years of loneliness because of her love for you and your siblings. I know it won't be easy for you, but be informed that your mum needs a man as she is still young. As she remarries ensure you don't treat her bad. She's has not wronged you, and she remains your mum forever. Cheer up and look up to your God for help. What about those who are orphans? You're even better than them.

Your mum has every right to remarry moreover she is still young to do so, loneliness keels faster, women needs men someone they can rely on

What a very selfish son.

Chram:
I write with Pains in my heart.
I wish to ask God why some certain events occur in life.
I have lots of questions to ask, but nobody to give me answers.

I describe as Selfish, inconsiderate and egoistical the decision of my mum to remarry.

So, I lost my lovely and caring dad six years ago. We had lived in Port Harcourt prior to his death. When we were traveling to the village, we packed all the little properties we had cos we were not going to return back to PH again since my mum would not be able to cater for myself and little siblings.
After the burial and funeral ceremony, we all stayed in the village. I mean a typical village where there's no good road, no electricity, no mobile network. I stayed for a few months, then left them to go squat with my friends in port Harcourt so I could hustle with my muscles and return back to sch at least because it had always been my dad's desire for all of us to go to sch, so I beat my chest and vowed that I would go to sch and graduate. Thank God, I'm done with sch now.

My current challenge now is my mum is in her mid forties and wants to remarry to a man in the village. She hasn't told me yet. But my paternal aunt called to inform me. I'm really worried because if she gets remarried, she will abandon my younger siblings who are there with her because she won't be allowed to take my siblings to her new husband's house as it is an abomination based on the customs and traditions of our place. If my siblings must live with her in that place, then they will have to start bearing the new husband's name as his children. Why ?

Also, as a male child, I'm not allowed to go visit here and eat or sleep over in her new house. If I do this, I might die. Why is this?

Based on reports, my grandfather(mum's dad) is the one mounting pressure on my mum to get married. I'm really worried about the whole situation because the ties between my mum and my siblings are about to be severed. Since my dad died, my mum has been living in her father's house instead of my dad's place. Though both places aren't far from each other. Its trekkable. I feel really hurt and betrayed, I can't even imagine my mum in the arms of another man. If I was stable in monetary and economic terms, I would have taken her out of that dungeon to come live with me, and also bring siblings along. I'm really pained as I type. Tears.. my dad died at age 47.

I wish u guys can beg my mum not to remarry please. What's the difference between me and someone from a Broken background?
Life is not fair to me and my siblings. Not fair at all. I know how I'm feeling right now.

Let me make it clear at this point that if her plans of remarrying goes through, I will dis-mother her. I'll cut all ties and destroy every bond that ever existed between herself and us the children.

File photo used for illustration

I think we share some similarities when it comes to life’s unpredictability. Your mom deserves to be happy, and the best way for her to achieve that might be through marriage. She even tried staying single for six years before remarrying.

I lost both of my parents and had to take on responsibilities at the age of 24. I sent my younger sister to learn fashion design while my youngest sibling focused on school. Fortunately, I was able to secure a job with a nonprofit, which helped me cover their expenses. Today, they both have something to support themselves, and I still assist them in whatever way I can. Despite everything, we share a strong bond built on mutual respect.

You seem like someone who is determined, and with that energy, I believe you can still maintain a close relationship with your siblings and your mom. No matter what, she still loves you all as her children. Try to look at the brighter side—holding onto grudges during your youthful years won’t be helpful in the long run.

Your mom really means well for you.

How I wish my own mom had taken such a bold step. After my father's passing, all she did was spend her time at church, giving away any help I offered—like bags of rice meant for our family—in the name of charity. She stayed home, doing nothing, and then vanished when it was time for church

I was raised in my uncle's house, a man she wouldn't stand by for, and he ended up selling all of my father's property before I even turned 20.

Would you have preferred that she carried the burden alone, ending up with little to show for it? You need a father figure to fight the battles ahead—connections, family issues, and more. It’s not something you can handle solo. It’s great that your mom is open to remarrying. I wish her all the best; she’s made a wise choice.

A half loaf is better than none, young one.

Remarry is good 👍

But why marry under such custom if it'sgoing tear the family apart? tell her she must not marry from your village. She should marry from another tribe/village.

Chilipepper:
I don't understand you this selfish inconsiderate son. Do you want your mum to be sneaking around and start sleeping with men in the village?

Apart from children, she doesn't have any tier again with your late father. Till death do us path was the vow. After death, surviving party can go on with his or her life.

You shouldn't be angry your mum wants to remarry instead you should be more concerned about your siblings and start planning a better life for them.

Your mum is broke and you still want to deprive her of being loved again..nawa o

Nawa! Over-understatement; with their various disturbing psychological complexes

All these boys testing their ability to create write-ups. Jump and pass any time I see this OP. I don mark am.

😂😂😂😂😂😂🤧🌞 I seeee

RillJ:
You own it to your siblings to work hard and smart, succeed and help them through.

She has every right to remarry to the person of her choice. Would you be happier if you are called one day that some village women are fighting with your mum for sleeping with their husband(s)? I can imagine how you feel but life must go on. Your siblings will be fine, las las.

Man up and support your mum for her happiness.

🙏🙏🙏

pinknipple:
Your mom really means well for you.

How I wish my own mom had taken such a bold step. After my father's passing, all she did was spend her time at church, giving away any help I offered—like bags of rice meant for our family—in the name of charity. She stayed home, doing nothing, and then vanished when it was time for church

I was raised in my uncle's house, a man she wouldn't stand by for, and he ended up selling all of my father's property before I even turned 20.

Would you have preferred that she carried the burden alone, ending up with little to show for it? You need a father figure to fight the battles ahead—connections, family issues, and more. It’s not something you can handle solo. It’s great that your mom is open to remarrying. I wish her all the best; she’s made a wise choice.

A half loaf is better than none, young one.

Sadly, her husband can't be a father or father figure to me. Tradition forbids him assuming such roles

Chram:
I write with Pains in my heart.
I wish to ask God why some certain events occur in life.
I have lots of questions to ask, but nobody to give me answers.

I describe as Selfish, inconsiderate and egoistical the decision of my mum to remarry.

So, I lost my lovely and caring dad six years ago. We had lived in Port Harcourt prior to his death. When we were traveling to the village, we packed all the little properties we had cos we were not going to return back to PH again since my mum would not be able to cater for myself and little siblings.
After the burial and funeral ceremony, we all stayed in the village. I mean a typical village where there's no good road, no electricity, no mobile network. I stayed for a few months, then left them to go squat with my friends in port Harcourt so I could hustle with my muscles and return back to sch at least because it had always been my dad's desire for all of us to go to sch, so I beat my chest and vowed that I would go to sch and graduate. Thank God, I'm done with sch now.

My current challenge now is my mum is in her mid forties and wants to remarry to a man in the village. She hasn't told me yet. But my paternal aunt called to inform me. I'm really worried because if she gets remarried, she will abandon my younger siblings who are there with her because she won't be allowed to take my siblings to her new husband's house as it is an abomination based on the customs and traditions of our place. If my siblings must live with her in that place, then they will have to start bearing the new husband's name as his children. Why ?

Also, as a male child, I'm not allowed to go visit here and eat or sleep over in her new house. If I do this, I might die. Why is this?

Based on reports, my grandfather(mum's dad) is the one mounting pressure on my mum to get married. I'm really worried about the whole situation because the ties between my mum and my siblings are about to be severed. Since my dad died, my mum has been living in her father's house instead of my dad's place. Though both places aren't far from each other. Its trekkable. I feel really hurt and betrayed, I can't even imagine my mum in the arms of another man. If I was stable in monetary and economic terms, I would have taken her out of that dungeon to come live with me, and also bring siblings along. I'm really pained as I type. Tears.. my dad died at age 47.

I wish u guys can beg my mum not to remarry please. What's the difference between me and someone from a Broken background?
Life is not fair to me and my siblings. Not fair at all. I know how I'm feeling right now.

Let me make it clear at this point that if her plans of remarrying goes through, I will dis-mother her. I'll cut all ties and destroy every bond that ever existed between herself and us the children.

File photo used for illustration

The tradition is the issue, not her wanting to remarry

Chram:
You're Harsh on me, honestly.

Honestly, he said what I was thinking. Your mum deserves the right to be happy too. She is human too. It's just so unfortunate that the laws of the land is biased toward women. I mean, is it the same for a widower.


God forbid . Put yourself in your mother's shoes as a man. Won't you go marry too or have a constant relationship with a female.or two?

laughs in abomination.

My own be say why no kuku compose the fake story without the fake pic and even more silly explanation? Does the pic look like a woman in the village in her 40s

2mch:
Abomination for you to visit. Abomination for your younger siblings to move in with her. Which village are you from? I seriously doubt your story. So for 6yrs, your mother just sat in her fathers house doing nothing, after having kids and being widowed?

FILEBE:
Honestly, he said what I was thinking. Your mum deserves the right to be happy too. She is human too. It's just so unfortunate that the laws of the land is biased toward women. I mean, is it the same for a widower.


God forbid . Put yourself in your mother's shoes as a man. Won't you go marry too or have a constant relationship with a female.or two?

I understand u Sir. Thank you

Fantazy:
The tradition is the issue, not her wanting to remarry

True

cyberbro:
Take heart bro, I know how you feel. You just have to be a man and a big bro to your younger ones, it's all part of life.

Make sure you honour your dad by always upholding his positive values in the family. All the best.

I PMed you

Chram:
I PMed you

Ok noted.

This ur people's culture is strange and bizarre.
Which Igbo village exactly are u from exactly?
I can't imagine such barbaric culture exist

Faber:
Visit your hometown unannounced, go to your father's grave at exactly 8:00pm or 9:00pm go with a kola nut and hot drink ... Call him, pray to him, cry to him and beg him to help you to keep his legacy and make him proud. He is your ancestor now, tell him you will return to take care of your siblings, but he should guide your way in the City... After this mount bike the next morning and leave the village without looking back...

Go back to PH, get out of school confront the streets real hard and conquer. I am writing this from Cameroun, when I come back to the country in 2 months time ... I will try to contact you and know how everything is going. Even if it means face to face meeting, I may come to PH to see you. I have some friends in Choba. Drop your email for me

I've mailed you already

cyberbro:
Ok noted.

Its well Bro

franugo:
I really doubt your story but in the slightest chance that it's real, then you sound like the quintessential selfish teenager from all these oyibo movies, all bark, no bite and no sense

Seen sir, I sincerely appreciate, May God replenish you in multiple folds sir.

cyberbro:
Ok noted.

Its well

Chram:
Its well

Can you just talk here? I don't really respond to DMs, sorry bro.

cyberbro:
Can you just talk here? I don't really respond to DMs, sorry bro.

Have a nice day pls .

NOTORIOUS100:
Seen sir, I sincerely appreciate, May God replenish you in multiple folds sir.

No p

franugo:
No p

Good day Sir

so what did you do?