₦airaland Forum

Ishilove:
Kobojunkie, they said singles should observe and learn but you must always show yourself

Hahahaha Kobojunkie na somehow person.

pocohantas:
Hasty decisions how?
I am sure we conversed less than 2 mths ago.
Please how did your wife go from being one of the few women we should learn from to what you are describing on this thread?

Then you don't know him,he has sometimes said it here that his wife is a cheat and he know about her games.

ahnie:
Then you don't know him,he has sometimes said it here that his wife is a cheat and he know about her games.

I have never seen him say that with this particular moniker. Or maybe I am confusing him with a similar username.

highchief1:
I no no Weda my woman Dey fear God abi na God Dey fear her.na dilemma ur guy Dey Sony kids small if not I for don take strong decision.

lol, do something about this whole thing sir. Your peace of mind matters a lot oo.

Fujiyama:
^^^
It means she has standards. That's the way it was done in the old days and there's a reason for that.

Virginity on its own doesn't necessarily guarantee marital success but it does say something about a person's (note that I didn't say woman) discipline, character, morals etc.

ok I concur but dem no born her we'll make she no take in after trad.

UyaiIncomparabl:
So, do you expect her to give you her chastity for free without a sense of commitment knowing you are bound to eventually flop considering how humans can be unstable and mentally volatile? Do you really expect her to do so? Think your response well and respond truthfully.

I agreed with her oo but after trad, she must take in.

goodmuscopi:
Well that should be enough. But you can't travel to some countries as a couple with traditional marriage cert.

court wedding certificate should be able to handle that, I strongly believe.

DenreleDave:
As a single guy... Can u please highlight what led to the divorce that can't be fixed

The truth is that we both have our faults. But I would say the issue of threat to life was a major factor. There were times she threatened me, and ones were I was moved to end her life too. So it was best to call it off... Also infidelity on her part. She was unfaithful on several occasions. I never cheated on her. That's the truth. But now I just want it to be over. ASAP

DDDDDav:
This is very serious. Does she also want the divorce?
Are you willing to give marriage a second chance?

nope... Nope... The issue is almost beyond us already... She has signed the papers already. What is left is for the court to fix a date and make a final judgement... But.... There may still be a 1% chance... Though I very much doubt

cunny88:
This is so pathetic, i wish I could hear the story of how you guys drifted apart

You see one advice I'd give couples is that no matter how the issue is... Always stay together. She left our home for close to a year and was living with her single friend who has issues with marriage. Why won't she think and act like her friend? So after that she decided to come back. By then my mind had practically left her. Even at that her coming back only aggravated it because we still had fights that left us seriously injured.

That's just a bit of it.

When I reported the issue to her family, they took it lightly. On a number of occasions they even laughed at me.. this may sound strange but it's true.. I'm not saying I'm faultless o... I sha had my own too..

ufotty2001:
what about doing traditional and white wedding?? Without court wedding

Exactly.. that's even better... Court wedding will just tie you down unnecessarily... But let me not be a devil's advocate.. if she's level headed a man can still do the court wedding. Just that such women are rare to find.

See ronaldo's Georgina for example.

Manculated:
Your marriage didn't bring forth children.

Good to hear this.

A deep sigh of relief.

Lots of innocent children suffer for what they know absolutely nothing about.

Make una part ways sharp go restart una lives anyhow una like and deal with una subsequent traumas.

Fact. That's very true. The children would have suffered. And if we had children we may have decided to just push on because of the children thereby sinking deeper into crisis.

lendahand:
imagine 34 year old lady I want to marry is insisting on court wedding, trad and white wedding before she will allow me have sex with her, can you imagine? Me I like her and she is a virgin but her conditions can't be met by me.

Just thread carefully.. she may be good or later change. Marriage nowadays is like bet9ja.. you see an olosho that gets married can have a blissful marriage. And a virgin (not your own o) may get married and after that start philandering. Marriage na gamble

lendahand:
lol, do something about this whole thing sir. Your peace of mind matters a lot oo.

u see as adams oshiomole say no peace in air peace.i can’t remember the last time I had peace as a man.na outside life Dey save me.if say I no Dey see money e for don bad by now.

edogu:
Now I see. There's nothing as good as peace of mind. I'm happy for you.

Since nairaland insists our comment must be up to 40 characters... I'd say.

Thank you.
Thank you
Thank you

Thank you 😃😃😃

lendahand:
I agreed with her oo but after trad, she must take in.

Leave her alone and find someone else who's yoked like you to marry.

Your mind is somewhat primitive.

pocohantas:
Hasty decisions how?
I am sure we conversed less than 2 mths ago.
Please how did your wife go from being one of the few women we should learn from to what you are describing on this thread?

no be only for marriage o.i have made so much mistakes in life due to lack of due diligence.But I go prevail.na when person take wake up be em morning.

Divaan:
Till date, I'll forever be grateful to God Almighty for my husband and the father of my kids. My husband is a perfect fit for me.
I thank God for bringing such a man my way. It could only have been God.

When I see the very wicked men, heartless ones, immatured ones, foolish ones, selfish ones, women haters, women shamers, abusers,etc that have infiltrated our world, I just keep thanking God. Guess I am among the few lucky ones cause I haven't faced marital challenges that is beyond me.

If you're single and wishing to be married to be the bone of your bone and flesh of your flesh. I'll advice you don't ridicule yourself with a list( I want a man or woman who is blah blah blah). Be the list. Build yourself to maturity. Strip yourself of every carnal desires and you'll get who/what you want.

I don't want to believe that people marry who they deserve 'cause He's a God of mercy.

Congratulations!

We wish to see more testimonies like this.

A healthy and loving family translates to healthy and loving society.

highchief1:
due deligence my brother.hasty decisions has destroyed my life.i no Dey hear word.

It is well my Chief.

You'll bounce back and get things right.

Manculated:
It is well my Chief.

You'll bounce back and get things right.

I will bro I be strong pikin.just that set back no be good thing for man life.but we move!Na only when person die the chapter close any other yawa no get level.

Well, marriage is for better for worse they say and I vowed to it at age 25+.. However,I have never for once felt I could be amongst those typing in a space as this..Was Pushed to the wall.. Forgave countless times,and was extremely understanding.. Never demanded a dime as I always depended on my salary.. Though not much as at then..Yet managed.. Finally, found peace after work took me to a distant location.
Haven't officially separated nor divorced..But am enjoying this NEW FOUND ME filled with peace, laughter, surrounded by God's presence and blessings.

highchief1:
no be only for marriage o.i have made so much mistakes in life due to lack of due diligence.But I go prevail.na when person take wake up be em morning.

So sorry about this. I pray things turn out well for you. Tbh, if one misses a choice or good spouse, it is hard for other things to go smoothly while dealing with domestic troubles.
You will prevail.

lendahand:
court wedding certificate should be able to handle that, I strongly believe.

Yes. That's y it's necessary to do a court wedding

Switruth:
My first girl is 25. Lol...........Are you seeing what I'm sawing ?

Maybe or maybe not .......................

lendahand:
I love her a lot guy. She sef knows. I have intentions of taking the relationship further. My point is why stress me a lot. At this age, she should just allow me do trad and load her first, then we conclude the rest later.

That's a good plan and the loading part cracks me up. Pls run all medicals o. Love sometimes is not enough

highchief1:
marriage na scam.i have falllen for it.im working on modalities to walk out of it.na my kids welfare I Dey consider.theres no need to marry a naija woman.They are only after what u can provide.i have not seen a Nigerian woman that loves a man genuinely.

The team "marriage na scam" African marriage institution no be scam o. Na u dey copy oyinbo pattern

Just look for a lady to give belle. Take good care of her and the child/children.

The wahala in marriage is too much.

CR7 is a real nigggga

My marriage is going on smoothly, in my next life I would still wanna marry my wife again.






The only major challenge is that I always feel reluctant to keep in touch with my father in-law because of what transpired when we were preparing to get married. He did many things to discourage me from getting married to his daughter but I didn't give up. The list he gave me is like bet naija slip but I chested it.......I told myself that after the marriage I would block his number but the anger left me after few days. We talk on phone once in a while but I only force myself to do it. Her mother is the only person I communicate with often, she's like my second mother because she loved me right from when her daughter introduced me to her when she visited in school.

The only people I cut communication with completely are her uncles and aunties. I got no business with them anymore.

naijapikin2:
Exactly.. that's even better... Court wedding will just tie you down unnecessarily... But let me not be a devil's advocate.. if she's level headed a man can still do the court wedding. Just that such women are rare to find.

See ronaldo's Georgina for example.

me I observe my wife. She fit change anytime.. that's why I asking

naijapikin2:
nope... Nope... The issue is almost beyond us already... She has signed the papers already. What is left is for the court to fix a date and make a final judgement... But.... There may still be a 1% chance... Though I very much doubt

Is it an Uncontested Divorce?

For it to be sorted out this fast (a year).

I'm sorry for what you went through.

You've mentioned Infidelity, Violence and Abandonment on her part and Violence on your part too.

Please what do you think were your faults in the marriage?