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That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want - Family - Nairaland

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That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Prec1ous(op): 10:16am On Aug 02, 2025
Let us be honest for a minute.

Most people are not stuck because of a lack of opportunities.
They are not stuck because they do not have talent.
They are stuck because they’re avoiding pain.

The real work of growth, becoming better, stronger, more focused, it’s uncomfortable. And let’s face it, humans avoid discomfort by default. We would rather stay in known suffering than take a step into unfamiliar pain that leads to progress.

But here is the thing:
The pain you are avoiding is exactly where your growth is hiding.

And until you confront it, face it, move through it, you will remain in the same place, going in circles, wondering why nothing changes.

What Kind of Pain Are You Avoiding?

Let’s name them.

You are avoiding the pain of waking up early to build that skill consistently.
You are avoiding the pain of telling yourself the truth, that you have been distracted for years.
You are avoiding the pain of discipline, because comfort feels better in the moment.
You are avoiding the pain of rejection, so you do not put yourself out there.
You are avoiding the pain of failure, so you never start.
You are avoiding the pain of being alone, so you cling to toxic relationships.
You are avoiding the pain of change, so you keep settling for what you have outgrown.

And here is the sad reality, that pain does not disappear. It waits.
And the longer you avoid it, the louder and stronger it becomes.

Avoiding pain does not protect you. It delays you.
And every delay has a price.

Why Most People Stay Stuck

We live in a time where people crave comfort more than clarity. Even myself.

We want the success, but not the sacrifice.
We want the confidence, but not the chaos that comes with growth.
We want to level up, but without letting go of the things holding us down.

So what happens?
People stay in situations they hate because it is easier than the work of change.
People repeat the same cycles every year, blaming others, never taking real inventory.
People numb their pain with distractions like TikTok, food, betting, parties, gossip, anything, just to avoid sitting with themselves.

And they call it “vibes.”
They call it “soft life.”
They call it “protecting my peace.”

But peace is not avoidance.
Peace is the reward of confronting your demons and winning.
Peace is what happens after the pain has been faced and processed.

Growth Is Not Gentle

Let us not romanticize growth. It is not a cute, "Instagrammable" journey. It is brutal. It is lonely. It breaks you. It stretches your mind. It crushes your ego.

But that is the point.

You cannot grow and remain the same.
You cannot evolve and still cling to everything that made you comfortable.
You cannot become your future self while babysitting your past self.

Something has to die.

Old habits.
Old mindsets.
Old relationships.
Old ways of thinking and reacting.
Old things must die.

Growth is painful because it requires death but not of your body, but of your old self.

And that version of you won’t go quietly. It will scream. It will sabotage you. It will fight to stay alive. But you have to be stronger. You have to push through the emotional discomfort and become someone you have never been before.

That is how you unlock a version of life you have never had before.

The Pain Is Your Teacher

Pain is not your enemy. Pain is a compass. It shows you exactly where to look.

If it hurts to admit you have been lazy then that is the area you need to fix.
If it stings to say you are afraid then that is the fear you need to confront.
If you feel uncomfortable sitting in silence with your own thoughts then that is the inner chaos you need to resolve.

Growth is not just about action. It is about honesty.
And pain is the flashlight that reveals what you’ve been hiding from yourself.

When you stop avoiding pain and start asking it questions, you get clarity.
-- “Why does this bother me so much?”
-- “Why am I triggered by this kind of feedback, question or criticism?”
-- “Why do I keep running away when things get hard?”
-- That is where the real transformation starts.
Not in hype. Not in aesthetics. Not in vibes.

In the pain. In the digging. In the truth.

No One Grows Without Stretching

Look at your body. Muscles grow by tearing.
Look at trees. Their roots fight through stone and soil.
Look at gold. It’s purified through fire.

Why do you think you are any different?

Comfort will lie to you. It will whisper that you are doing okay. It will sedate you. It will pamper you with ease, but rob you of evolution.

Meanwhile, pain will break you. Then build you.
It will humble you. Then sharpen you.
It will empty you. Then fill you with something deeper, something real.

That is what you’re missing if you keep running from the hard stuff.

So What Do You Do Now?

You stop running.

You face the thing that makes you uncomfortable.
You have the hard conversation.
You wake up when it is hard.
You show up when you are not in the mood.
You let go of the dead weight, even if you once loved it.
You say yes to the pain that leads to progress.

And you do it daily.

Because growth is not an event. It is a process. A fight. A journey.

And every time you lean into the pain instead of avoiding it, you expand your capacity. You become stronger. Wiser. Sharper. More dangerous in the best way.

Final Word

The life you want is on the other side of the pain you keep avoiding.
The version of you that is focused, disciplined, grounded, respected [quote]is born in fire.

So you have two choices:
-- Keep running, and stay stuck.
-- Or stop avoiding, and start evolving.
-- It is not easy. It was never meant to be. But it is worth it.


Every drop of sweat. Every moment of discomfort. Every tear.
It all becomes worth it, when the version of you that is been waiting inside finally steps out and takes over.

So feel the pain. Do not escape it.

Let it grow you. Let it make you the best!
Precious Iriaevho
CrudeClarity - Raw Truths. Real Growth.

Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by thesicilian: 10:20am On Aug 02, 2025
Truer words have never been said.
Most of the time avoiding pain also means avoiding progress
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Prec1ous(op): 10:21am On Aug 02, 2025
Pain is essential for growth. We must face them to be able to move right!
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Cum4me(m): 10:58am On Aug 02, 2025
This is deep and full of reality. With this religion is a no no. grin
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Prec1ous(op):
This will be a great for the front page. Just as we try to take front seat role of our lives. Raw truth are not meant to make you happy.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Goodlady(f): 1:32pm On Aug 03, 2025
Let me eat first before I comment my reserve.
Comment my reserve eat let me first.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Brahamimo(m): 1:37pm On Aug 03, 2025
I'm in pains.
I've endured so much pains in this life.
When will these pains end?
From birth, till now, it's pains.
It's suffering
It's hardship
Death of loved ones.
Difficulty in having a comfortable existence.
None to call on.... I'm tired of everything sef!
It's work work work and work. Work like an elephant but eat smaller than an ant. I've never in my life worked in any place that pays me 50k salary despite being a graduate. Is this not painful?
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by tollyboy5(m): 1:37pm On Aug 03, 2025
Make sense. I don't have 31 more characters to add, I don tok finish.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by fredoooooo: 1:37pm On Aug 03, 2025
Fact.... face it , accept and embrace it .. you will come out successfully in the end
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by tollyboy5(m): 1:39pm On Aug 03, 2025
Brahamimo:
I'm in pains.
I've endured so much pains in this life.
When will these pains end?
The pain in the article, I didn't read it thoroughly but I think it's the pain that comes with self development and not pain that comes with lack of something
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by omoredia: 1:40pm On Aug 03, 2025
All these fake motivation are just a way for them to make people comfortable with a failed apc govt. During GEJ time they weren't saying all these.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Talismann: 1:40pm On Aug 03, 2025
some people never chop since yesterday morning, which other pain dey greater than the one from belle hunger pains.

How do I explain to my hungry friends that they should embrace their hunger pangs when they can't even find a decent job when they are for sure qualified.

How do I explain to the man whose child was killed for money ritual to embrace the pain?

How do I explain to the family who worked so hard to buy a car but it was stolen at gun point and they are back to square one.

Nigerians are mostly hardy people by default who don't give up. But the location they find themselves make life unbearable.

What more pain can they take before folding up?

The write up make sense but people are suffering seriously that this doesn't even resonate with them
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by oyeb15:
The pain you are experiencing in d hike of fuel will lead u to nowhere except poverty.

What d writer see as pain in discipline, going to school etc ain't pain but fun. Many people still consider school life and being under once strict parents as d best time of their life.

The pain dis government inflict on the people is to enable them have more than enough to loot, squander and keep for their future generation.

Politicians has been promising since 1999. Where is vision 2020 today. Where is electricity that $2 billion dollars was borrowed to fix in 2002.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Elzazzi: 1:41pm On Aug 03, 2025
Brahamimo:
I'm in pains.
I've endured so much pains in this life.
When will these pains end?
From birth, till now, it's pains.
It's suffering
It's hardship
Death of loved ones.
Difficulty in having a comfortable existence.
None to call on.... I'm tired of everything sef!
It's work work work and work. Work like an elephant but eat smaller than an ant. I've never in my life worked in any place that pays me 50k salary despite being a graduate. Is this not painful?
My bro. It’s the country we found ourselves in. But again one must take daring risks to change some certain stories
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by FunnyDude(m): 1:42pm On Aug 03, 2025
Leave pain alone, Nigerians have suffered enough pain. Tell me which other pain is much more brutal than unemployment, hunger, starvation, lack of quality drinkable water, lack of quality healthcare system, massive looting & corruption by the 1% in government, gruesome killings and kidnapping.


Must we all endure pain everytime, why can't we preach the "dividend of good governance" which should have solve most of our pains.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by PheelzAlmighty: 1:42pm On Aug 03, 2025
You fit still face the pain make the pain kpai you 💀
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by judewrites: 1:42pm On Aug 03, 2025
Oranges 🍊 are sweet....but unless they are crushed, their sweetness can't be obtained.

Like being crushed, everyone must experience a level of pain or rather discipline to be or remain relevant.

Nobody is born empty, we are gifted in some aspects but It takes a lot of discipline to be among the best in your genre.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Brahamimo(m): 1:42pm On Aug 03, 2025
tollyboy5:
The pain in the article, I didn't read it thoroughly but I think it's the pain that comes with self development and not pain that comes with lack of something
I'm in pains.
I'm in pains.

No matter the pain, pain is pain. Lack is even more painful
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Goldbw122(m): 1:43pm On Aug 03, 2025
Whatever is causing you pain, take time to look into the root of it. Is it from an investment, or something else you’ve put your effort into?
Running away from responsibilities only blocks your growth. You have to face them simple.
That’s where real growth and progress begin.
Don’t worry, failure will come, but you’ll learn to manage it and keep moving forward.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Brahamimo(m): 1:43pm On Aug 03, 2025
Elzazzi:
My bro. It’s the country we found ourselves in. But again one must take daring risks to change some certain stories
I'm telling you Bro.

I'm honestly tired of everything
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Pennywise2: 1:44pm On Aug 03, 2025
Let the spirit lead you to ease the pain in life. U really deserve more
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by free2ryhme: 1:49pm On Aug 03, 2025
[quote author=Prec1ous post=136316428][/quote]You’d be better off staying silent and focusing on something meaningful with your life.

How many of the hardships you're glorifying did the children of billionaires actually endure to achieve growth?
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by tollyboy5(m): 1:49pm On Aug 03, 2025
Brahamimo:
I'm in pains.
I'm in pains.

No matter the pain, pain is pain. Lack is even more painful
You're still missing the concept. You're a graduate shouldn't be a yardstick.
No one is actually better off than the other person but when we start realising we need to realign and reshape everything about our ideology and concept then we can have a meaningful discussion.
You're complaining and not developing. If your complain comes from development then you'll have more chances of getting rewards.
If your complains comes from surviving then you'll need extra ordinary grace.

You hinting on being a graduate has shown that you're doing things wrongly.
You don't deserve better because you're a graduate.
You should deserve better for doing things differently
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Prec1ous(op): 1:50pm On Aug 03, 2025
free2ryhme:
You’d be better off staying silent and focusing on something meaningful with your life.

How many of the hardships you're glorifying did the children of billionaires actually endure to achieve growth?
Pain here is different from hardship. There are some pain you need toove forward.

The pain of learning a knowledge is what sets you apart from those who did not follow through.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Prec1ous(op): 1:52pm On Aug 03, 2025
tollyboy5:
The pain in the article, I didn't read it thoroughly but I think it's the pain that comes with self development and not pain that comes with lack of something
Thank you. I think people also see self development as hardship. This is sad.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by tollyboy5(m): 1:52pm On Aug 03, 2025
free2ryhme:
You’d be better off staying silent and focusing on something meaningful with your life.

How many of the hardships you're glorifying did the children of billionaires actually endure to achieve growth?
Children of billionaires you say?
Check the family tree and see where the change started.
The ancestors might not be a billionaire.
You are not ready to learn
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Prec1ous(op): 1:53pm On Aug 03, 2025
Brahamimo:
I'm in pains.
I've endured so much pains in this life.
When will these pains end?
From birth, till now, it's pains.
It's suffering
It's hardship
Death of loved ones.
Difficulty in having a comfortable existence.
None to call on.... I'm tired of everything sef!
It's work work work and work. Work like an elephant but eat smaller than an ant. I've never in my life worked in any place that pays me 50k salary despite being a graduate. Is this not painful?
I am sorry about how you feel. But hardship imposed on you by others and the pain of becoming a better person are different. Even leaving smoking to live long is painful.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by derico(m): 1:54pm On Aug 03, 2025
Is there any time in our past that we consciously outgrew a phase?

What aspects of our lives have we in time past, consciously controlled and modified?
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Godmind2022(m): 1:57pm On Aug 03, 2025
You can not say it better. You are right. May God help us.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Trustedpronet: 2:03pm On Aug 03, 2025
Very encouraging, but always remember that Nigeria pains is different from the other countries. Nigeria is a peculiar case.
Re: That Pain You Are Avoiding Is The Key To The Growth You Want by Zumarocket(f): 2:16pm On Aug 03, 2025
omoredia:
All these fake motivation are just a way for them to make people comfortable with a failed apc govt. During GEJ time they weren't saying all these.
you are really funny

the remaining characters will be added when am back from hell
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