₦airaland Forum

I don't have any business with my wife's phone. Been married for three years now.

Who is chatting her is not my business cause i believe nothing is hidden under the sun.

My wife cannot access my messages, it's locked. I believe it's wrong to read your partners messages.

pocohantas:
For man? That is for your enduring wives.
Not me, Qualityoʻffer

Oshey hard woman but you go go dey cry for closet ...

kellexnuel:
I don't have any business with my wife's phone. Been married for three years now.

Who is chatting her is not my business cause i believe nothing is hidden under the sun.

My wife cannot access my messages, it's locked. I believe it's wrong to read your partners messages.

No it's not.

Ishilove:
Be there writing rubbish. You think life is all about rules and lists?

You have gotten me banned on this site over 3 times now.
Abeg from now hence forth, simply ignore my posts. I use God take beg you. Carry your wahala dey your dey.

Nnamdipapa:
So, I was in deep sleep when suddenly I woke up around 4 a.m. I reached for my phone, which I usually keep on the bedside table before going to bed, and to my surprise, the phone was nowhere to be found.

Still half asleep, I stretched my hand around in the darkness, thinking maybe it had slipped into the crack between the bed and the wall, but no, my phone was gone.

Now, I could swear on a stack of Bibles that my phone was right beside me before I dozed off the previous night. I was even up till midnight, scrolling as usual, before retiring for the night. Normally, whenever I wake up, I check my phone for the time.

Out of curiosity, I reached to the right side of the bed and noticed my wife’s spot was empty. Hmm.

I dragged my sleepy self to the bathroom to ease myself and, lo and behold; there was madam, inside the bathroom, with my phone on the floor. I was shocked, because I knew for sure I didn’t leave it there.

Anyway, I picked up the phone, went back to bed, and when I got under the sheets, I glanced at it. To my greatest confirmation, WhatsApp was open. Someone had been going through my chats.

I used to have strong security on the phone, but I relaxed it recently for some reasons. That’s probably how she got access. She pretended like she didn’t touch my phone, and I pretended like maybe I mistakenly left it in the bathroom. I didn’t challenge her. I just smiled under the sheets and went back to sleep.

The next morning, while replaying the whole incident in my head, some questions came to mind.

Ladies, what exactly do women want?

What are you looking for when you sneak into your husband’s phone and monitor his activities online? What exactly do you plan to do if you find suspicious chats with another woman? What next after all that stress of staying awake all night, plotting how to get hold of his phone?

Luckily for me, I have four WhatsApp accounts. Three are heavily passworded. The one she checked is just the “decoy” account with light security.

Then I remembered my maternal grandfather—the great man who had five wives. He eventually died on the sexy laps of a beautiful Ijaw side chick (yes, true story). Yet, none of his wives ever ransacked his belongings or violated his privacy like this. Meanwhile, me with only one wife, I’m already seeing shege. I still have a long way to go to match that man’s legacy.

So again I ask: why do women believe their husbands are under total control, and must be monitored 24/7? Don’t you people get tired?

Marriage does not automatically mean access to every single aspect of a man’s life. The life of an African man is hard enough, sometimes he just deserves small enjoyment without his privacy being constantly violated.

I honestly don’t get it. Maybe some of you can explain whether you really think marriage gives you the right to every corner of your husband’s life, including his private space.

I come in peace. Hehehehehe.

is he in any way related to muhammed?

Silentgroper:
Oshey hard woman but you go go dey cry for closet ...

If that makes you happier. A crying babymama in her closet. Hopefully other women can get the fact you guys do not even want them "happily married".

luminouz:
🤣🤣🤣🤣

Hey!

We4all:
Hey!

What? Go away!!

luminouz:
What? Go away!!

Stop pretending to be a tough guy, cos you are not.

Kdon2:
✓ Some women are brick walls. You can't penetrate their rigid mind

Then leave them, not cheat on them then turn around to blame them— gaslight the women into taking blame— for your cheating, it screams of blatant immaturity. Hiding your escapades via various apps clearly shows the women have reasons to be bothered.

Anyways, na women wey dey put up with it all I dey blame.

We4all:
Stop pretending to be a tough guy, cos you are not.

I am...stop trying to matronise me!!?

Kobojunkie:
Then leave them, not cheat on them then turn around to blame them for your cheating, it screams of blatant immaturity. Hiding your escapades via various apps clearly shows the women have reasons to be bothered.

Anyways, na women wey dey put up with it all I dey blame.

K

pocohantas:
If that makes you happier. A crying babymama in her closet. Hopefully other women can get the fact you guys do not even want them "happily married".

Now you wanna make me look bad, even when I just told you to follow an advice that'll get you a happy home ..


Not Cool...

Anyways listen to experience women like ishi, you'd be okay.. I'm done here...

but certainly not you...but u advising others to accept their wife receiving gifts

Proudlyngwa:
A lot of societal engineering going on in this thread.

Am an advocate of everyone letting the other know where the belonf

First and foremost in my context , African men dont cheat, the become irresponsible.
Anyman that is bothered about his wife checking his phone and seeing whatsoever is not a man, my wife checks my phone, sees all my girlfriends pictures and the rest , so how this is an issue is what i dont understand.
However coming to the woman, it is the job of a man to give her security and contentment, if she feels she cant get that from one man, let her open up and say it, instead of hiding and getting things from others, if the man is ok with it, that is his buisiness, but certainly not me.

Silentgroper:
Now you wanna make me look bad, even when I just told you to follow an advice that'll get you a happy home .. Not Cool...Anyways listen to experience women like ishi, you'd be okay.. I'm done here...

I have a mother at home and my dad never made her endure. I would listen to my dad.
Enjoy the rest of your weekend.

luminouz:
I am...stop trying to matronise me!!?

Sweetheart, you are not tough. Time will tell!

Nnamdipapa:
Luckily for me, I have four WhatsApp accounts. Three are heavily passworded. The one she checked is just the “decoy” account with light security.

See Odogwu!

Coming in peace will not work on this one because some of your opposite gender don’t take this issue peacefully. It revolve around their life

Mistersolar:
but certainly not you...but u advising others to accept their wife receiving gifts

where did i say they should

I said ifthey are cool with it, thats okay

Nnamdipapa:
So, I was in deep sleep when suddenly I woke up around 4 a.m. I reached for my phone, which I usually keep on the bedside table before going to bed, and to my surprise, the phone was nowhere to be found.

Still half asleep, I stretched my hand around in the darkness, thinking maybe it had slipped into the crack between the bed and the wall, but no, my phone was gone.

Now, I could swear on a stack of Bibles that my phone was right beside me before I dozed off the previous night. I was even up till midnight, scrolling as usual, before retiring for the night. Normally, whenever I wake up, I check my phone for the time.

Out of curiosity, I reached to the right side of the bed and noticed my wife’s spot was empty. Hmm.

I dragged my sleepy self to the bathroom to ease myself and, lo and behold; there was madam, inside the bathroom, with my phone on the floor. I was shocked, because I knew for sure I didn’t leave it there.

Anyway, I picked up the phone, went back to bed, and when I got under the sheets, I glanced at it. To my greatest confirmation, WhatsApp was open. Someone had been going through my chats.

I used to have strong security on the phone, but I relaxed it recently for some reasons. That’s probably how she got access. She pretended like she didn’t touch my phone, and I pretended like maybe I mistakenly left it in the bathroom. I didn’t challenge her. I just smiled under the sheets and went back to sleep.

The next morning, while replaying the whole incident in my head, some questions came to mind.

Ladies, what exactly do women want?

What are you looking for when you sneak into your husband’s phone and monitor his activities online? What exactly do you plan to do if you find suspicious chats with another woman? What next after all that stress of staying awake all night, plotting how to get hold of his phone?

Luckily for me, I have four WhatsApp accounts. Three are heavily passworded. The one she checked is just the “decoy” account with light security.

Then I remembered my maternal grandfather—the great man who had five wives. He eventually died on the sexy laps of a beautiful Ijaw side chick (yes, true story). Yet, none of his wives ever ransacked his belongings or violated his privacy like this. Meanwhile, me with only one wife, I’m already seeing shege. I still have a long way to go to match that man’s legacy.

So again I ask: why do women believe their husbands are under total control, and must be monitored 24/7? Don’t you people get tired?

Marriage does not automatically mean access to every single aspect of a man’s life. The life of an African man is hard enough, sometimes he just deserves small enjoyment without his privacy being constantly violated.

I honestly don’t get it. Maybe some of you can explain whether you really think marriage gives you the right to every corner of your husband’s life, including his private space.

I come in peace. Hehehehehe.

If I tell you what the scenario here is, you will feel bad. But hey, let me say it. They start to monitor you like this when they themselves are cheating. Take this to the bank. If you doubt me do a little digging and you will find out she has started talking to someone or have gone farer than that already.

Checkwell:
You are faithful with multiple, heavily passworded whatsapp amounts? And a "decoy" amount for deciving your wife?

Please just shut up.

Okay my mouth is Shut 😩 Sir 😞🤐

Kobojunkie:
Then leave them, not cheat on them then turn around to blame them— gaslight the women into taking blame— for your cheating, it screams of blatant immaturity. Hiding your escapades via various apps clearly shows the women have reasons to be bothered.

Anyways, na women wey dey put up with it all I dey blame.

Allow your men some space, don't choke them. You will only breed resentment. Everyday is not Christmas. Men need alone time to sort themselves out without pressure from you women.

We4all:
Sweetheart, you are not tough. Time will tell!

Don't sweetheart me....

Lol...now you rely on time? Thought you were so sure!!!

Nonexisting1:
If I tell you what the scenario here is, you will feel bad. But hey, let me say it. They start to monitor you like this when they themselves are cheating. Take this to the bank. If you doubt me do a little digging and you will find out she has started talking to someone or have gone farer than that already.

Me dig? Mbanu!

I am not bothered about her cheating on me and she knows that. I don't have time to dig around and look for supposed evidence of cheating. I might even be amenable to an open relationship from both side. Life is too sweet to be digging around monitoring someone.

luminouz:
Don't sweetheart me....

Lol...now you rely on time? Thought you were so sure!!!

Time is what dictates our existence, sweetheart. You can be sure of something happening, but won't really know the exact time of its occurence. So, how are you? Did you miss me?

Maeve7:
When you people grow up and start your own families with all the responsibilities that come along with running a home and taking care of children, you will outgrow all your red pill nonsense philosophies.

Red pill was primarily created out of families and responsibilities. Older guys whom had been there, done that,left or still in the plantation like Nnamdipapa, are the ones teaching their experience.

Wetin smalll boys know about red pilll experience?

Kobojunkie:
Your title is misleading as it assumes that only women snoop around their spouses' phones. There are enough posts here on Nairaland— Romance section to be exact— revealing that both males and females are guilty of this sort of snooping, particularly those who are insecure and anxious in their relationship. :- l

2. Marriage may not be that, but it does remain that for two people to successfully maneuver a marriage, there ought to be openness and extensive communication between the two. You have made it abundantly known to all of us here on Nairaland that you have checked out on that marriage, meaning you are just living with a roommate all of this time. Your wife isn't on the same page as you there, as her snooping through your phone means she is unsure of the present and the future of the relationship she has with you. If she shared the same feelings you do regarding the marriage, she would probably not be in the same bed with you or even pay attention to anything that has to do with you.

And again, a lot of men do the same.

3. Again, this ain't really about women but about a communication gap that seems to exist in your relationship there.

bar bash

We4all:
Time is what dictates our existence, sweetheart. You can be sure of something happening, but won't really know the exact time of its occurence. So, how are you? Did you miss me?

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣.

You are something I'd give you that. I miss the time we yabbed each other. What the hell happened to you? Got yourself religion or something?

kushme:
Red pill was primarily created out of families and responsibilities. Older guys whom had been there, done that,left or still in the plantation like Nnamdipapa, are the ones teaching their experience.

Wetin smalll boys know about red pilll experience?

In other words, guys whose relationships and marriages failed are teaching boys how to fail.

Got it.