₦airaland Forum

Most people at the time do not recognize a blessing in disguise. Some realize it some time after. I'm almost sure if she went ahead with the marriage by now she'll be stashed in a.madnhouse....or in a box six feet under. The mother in law made sure the wedding did not take place. The husband is fully controlled by his mother. She should've seen the signs.

LordIsaac:
I think it was just a test in submission. If you really love the guy, nothing on earth can take him away from you.

You say wetin? And if the guy really loved the lady?

fabolouz1:
This story is not real because wtf ? people are depressed and cook up stories to gather sympathy.

Siddon there dey look. Person drop hin full name, you say story no true 😒.

Lekan239:
If its ur husband immediate siblings/cousin, etc then using respect tone for them is still ideal. But 11year old husband neice or nephew. Haba o bad na. Those once self should be calling u mummy and u can act as mother figure for them

Na dat exact matter baffle me o. Niece? Really? Sisters or cousins, a si n gbo yen.

Double0h7:
I didn’t like all the credentials she was dropping! I hate when people make jobs and certifications an extension of themselves. It’s some low self esteem vibes.

I remember meeting a guy and he told me not to call him by his name but to add doctor before his name. I told him you’re not my doctor so I won’t be calling you doctor so and so. He was offended and I just stopped calling him full stop. Some people need to get a personality!

In a professional settings or academia (in a sane country of course) you can be sacked for addressing someone a name they dont want. If someone tells you to address them as AB and you call them B. HR will warn you one or two times, the next is sacking you. It is "harassment" depending on the context.

So no use this brain go western country you hear?

Double0h7:
I didn’t like all the credentials she was dropping! I hate when people make jobs and certifications an extension of themselves. It’s some low self esteem vibes.

I am sure the highest qualification you have in life is O'level or highest paded degree where you cheated to graduate. An educated person will see no issue with that and alo it is not low self esteem. A lot of people worked hard for their degrees and achievements.

ufotunang:
..so if she calls the 11 years old girl Aunty.. then what will the 11 years old girl call the lady that is more older than her

not by force to marry from there if u can't follow their own tradition. Not everything is civilization as I said.

APCNig:
We don’t want people who abuse our Culture either, so we have shown her the door.

My wife calls my younger nieces Aunty, and whenever they meet her, they kneel down with their two knees to greet, they just don’t bend down to greet my wife, they kneel down with their two knees. Respect is Reciprocal. If any if my family disrespects my Wife, I will beat him or her to unconsciousness, he or she will only wake up at the hospital.

We will not allow any human nor spirit to debase our Culture. Our Forefathers were not mad when they set up the unwritten LAW

Exactly!
The fact that you call every child uncle or anty does not take your masters or position in life from you. Its a tradition and I think for a while until there is a junior wife after you. The children are also taught to respect you, they will never call you by name either and they pay obeisance (kneel or prostrate) to greet you, they will run errands for you .... in fact all of them are assigned chores to perform for you daily

ITS A CULTURE of Respect is Reciprocal ..... as you have just joined the family, you are the new baby of the clan......YOU GOT IT!

Sometimes you need to bring down your pride to enjoy the benefit of Rescpect.

All those people supporting your failure 'the test of submission' must be GZee who never enjoyed that priviledge when they were kids ..... In fact i enjoyed beautiful name Safe, Olu-ire, Akowe, Baba Oko mi, Eyinfunjowo .....WAO! But I run message tire, with pride sef!!

brain54:
During my undergraduate days I lived off campus...

well written and very articulate.

jmoore:
https://www.facebook.com/100071450056350/posts/pfbid08MSo7iCYAXR8b6gvpL3iR1UXYkFZBia23sHekfA8SigKnTXYLMZV4PnmAug6QmP4l/?app=fbl

You did the right thing. You dodged a bullet. Imagine demanding that the love of my life double07 do such. Never!!!

Double0h7:
I didn’t like all the credentials she was dropping! I hate when people make jobs and certifications an extension of themselves. It’s some low self esteem vibes.

I remember meeting a guy and he told me not to call him by his name but to add doctor before his name. I told him you’re not my doctor so I won’t be calling you doctor so and so. He was offended and I just stopped calling him full stop. Some people need to get a personality!

Are you serious no naaaaw. That's totally disrespectful. I'm glad u dodged

YourGFsnatcher:
Are you serious no naaaaw. That's totally disrespectful. I'm glad u dodged

It’s professor double07 to you 🧐.

Social media n news that never happened

Nicknames have always been around instead of Auntie. That's where names like Orente, Ibadi Aran and so came very handy for younger in-laws

brain54:
Lol...

This one na cheat code!

correctyourself:
My last paragraph already dealt with it.

Yeah

Double0h7:
It’s professor double07 to you 🧐.

I sight you 💯
Jane bond can't be messed with

They is more to this story op just tell us the part that favors her..


Am Joseph by name .Almost all my brother and uncles wife call my brother Joseph..that doesn't make me look them less or make the feel less of themselves.

Some people are rude with genuine excuses to back it ..no worry!

Count your blessings and move on.. that mother-in-law is the type to make marriage hell for you.
The man you wanted to marry sef is stupid.. how will he stand by and watch such ugly treatment on his would be bride by the mother?..

@OP Sincerely, thank your stars you didn't marry the weakling.. they would have asked you to be kneeling down to greet toddlers just to make a silly so called mother-in-law happy. He should go and look for slave to marry, not a modern woman with class.

princeade86:
not by force to marry from there if u can't follow their own tradition. Not everything is civilization as I said.

.. please take it easy..we are not quarelling.oo

KillahPriest:
STOP FABRICATING STORIES THAT NEVER HAPPENED O !!!!

Sir, I just want to tell you that it's very possible.
I remembered when I was summoned at my in-law's place, they told me I'm supposed to be washing the cloth of a 12 year old child that came for holiday because he was my inlaw.

Me o, I told the Baba I can wash his clothes if I see he can't handle it as my child but not to gather his clothes to wash because he's an in-law.

those elderly folks get their own for body.

Thank God you didn’t end up marrying such a man. Many local Yoruba Muslims, especially from Ibadan or Osun, tend to display this kind of mentality. As I read your story, I kept wondering what your fiancé’s response would be. From the way he acted at first, I truly thank God for you, because it would have been far worse if you had married him. The things you would have experienced in that family would have shocked you. You will meet a better, more mature man.

jmoore:
https://www.facebook.com/100071450056350/posts/pfbid08MSo7iCYAXR8b6gvpL3iR1UXYkFZBia23sHekfA8SigKnTXYLMZV4PnmAug6QmP4l/?app=fbl

L'ésu fẹ́ fẹ́ ọkọ? Oga o!

Oizee:
Sir, I just want to tell you that it's very possible.
I remembered when I was summoned at my in-law's place, they told me I'm supposed to be washing the cloth of a 12 year old child that came for holiday because he was my inlaw.

Me o, I told the Baba I can wash his clothes if I see he can't handle it as my child but not to gather his clothes to wash because he's an in-law.

those elderly folks get their own for body.

hmm interesting story. My mum calls all my cousins' aunties and uncles, my wife also does the same. They have excellent relationships with my cousins, and those ones show them immense respect in turn. I kind of like it maybe i m traditional and like to know people are not small on the inside.
I like the part where the OP asked if they would have demanded she does the reverence thing if she was Otedolas daughter, but I ask, how do you know Otedolas daughter doesnt do it, you ld be shocked people like Otedolas daughters may, I said may, not have pride issues because everyone already worships them.
So, I ask her, if she was marrying into Otedolas family, wont she gladly do it as well. So, in the end its about pride and how she views the prize. His family is not influential enough for her to bend over backwards enough for entry.

Personally as someone being called brother by my Uncle's wife, I disliked it. I'll ask within myself why she has to be adding ; Brother' to my name.
Yoruba specially considered that norm in marriage sacred but that's not a valid reason to call off the marriage. There's more the issues, perhaps a hidden hatred from the mother-in-law prior to that time. She only used that as excuse