₦airaland Forum

VOsimhen144:
na why I support polygamous marriage to an extent… as this op wife dey give am unnecessary attitude you go Jst switch go the second wife kpekus.

OP, sit her down and talk to her, know what the issue is, if she no give u concrete reason and she no adjust, no jst dey stress urself, kpekus full everywhere, as low as 10k you go knack better kpekus.
U go run am codedly, no let ur wife know.
Life no hard abeg..

Na so una dey take go outside go pack evil spirit wey full outside, carry enter una home.
When things begin fall apart, una no go open mouth talk wetin una do.
God dey watch all of una!

Ozzyk:
When she started having cramps we both it's her normal menstrual cramps.... After 3 weeks we confirmed the result of pregnancy
Her pregnancy was just 3 weeks old whe we did the test
And from our calendar the date of conception is about the time we had our first sex.... The second night of our wedding

You don carry your private sensitive matter enter nairaland, abi?
If you like, let them make you begin doubt your new wife, and destroy your home, you hear?

As for your wife, I believe her body is going through a phase/process she's not familiar with, and everything is happening so fast -- between the time she had her first sex, and conceiving.
Just try to be patient with her, and keep helping her in any way you can, to make her feel comfortable.
Hopefully, by the 2nd-3rd trimester, things will change for the better.
You might not have to wait until after she gives birth.

Go ahead with cheating, and masturbating.....Safely and Secretly, till she gets herself together... If she dosen't after a long time, then look for another wife.

Mariangeles:
You don carry your private sensitive matter enter nairaland, abi?
If you like, let them make you begin doubt your new wife, and destroy your home, you hear?

As for your wife, I believe her body is going through a phase/process she's not familiar with, and everything is happening so fast -- between the time she had her first sex, and conceiving.
Just try to be patient with her, and keep helping her in any way you can, to make her feel comfortable.
Hopefully, by the 2nd-3rd trimester, things will change for the better.
You might not have to wait until after she gives birth.

Her bodies going through a face me I slap you, so that's why she can't kiss, cuddle or romance her husband? Be deceiving yourself.

OKOATA:
Her bodies going through a face me I slap you, so that's why she can't kiss, cuddle or romance her husband? Be deceiving yourself.

You are not a woman, so you can't understand.

Mariangeles:
You are not a woman, so you can't understand.

That one na your wahala. How can I get the artwork on your PF..

omotolly22:
Just be patient and give her the benefit of this first trimester which is 3 month

By the second trimester, you guys should be able to have regular sex back

Talking from experience, first trimester is usually the risky part of pregnancy, cramps ,morning sickness, risk of miscarriage etc

But by second trimester, she should be able to comply to your demand, except she is hiding something

There was never a time they had regular sex, going by the op

Thank you... The regular sex was only for 10 days before she missed her period
And ever since then there has been nothing like that

kiddaz:
There was never a time they had regular sex, going by the op

Ozzyk:
Thank you... The regular sex was only for 10 days before she missed her period
And ever since then there has been nothing like that

10 days straight...?

You just dey fire dey go. You want make up for lost time.

Abeg make una leave me, I say I no wan talk for this thread again!

Yes you just nailed it.

omotolly22:
Just be patient and give her the benefit of this first trimester which is 3 month

By the second trimester, you guys should be able to have regular sex back

Talking from experience, first trimester is usually the risky part of pregnancy, cramps ,morning sickness, risk of miscarriage etc

But by second trimester, she should be able to comply to your demand, except she is hiding something

OP, look for something that makes her happy and spoil her with, e.g things she craves for, pet her and make her happy.

Ozzyk:
We got married in ending of August
We didn't have anything to do together at all during our 2 year courtship
She's really adorable and a Godly babe to the core
On the second night of our wedding I confirmed she was a virgin
Sadly our honeymoon only lasted Barely 2 weeks before she missed her period
Here is the issue;
Since over a month and some few weeks now she won't let me touch her, in fact it's like my touches irritate her, no sex, no kiss, no smooching, no touching
It sometimes feels we're just house mates who shares same matrimonial bed together
I have tried to talk to her many times about my sexual wellness but she seems not interested at all
My marriage is less than 2 months and I am already over a month sex starved
Perhaps she sometimes complains of pregnancy cramps but this should not com at the detriment of my sexual well being.....
And besides she's goes to work everyday but the moments she gets home she won't let me touch not even slight touches not to talk of sex or romance....
I am already tired 😩

Try smooches and warm embraces look into her eyes and tell her you love her,groom her teach her how to knack guy forget ,groom your wife you know that firstly sex is not enjoyable especially if the woman is a virgin and doesn't get experiences after na you go dey carry her go iCloud with different styles after that buy her better gift and knack Better dressing on yourself,smell nice and don't too bother her she'll be craving for your attention.

You guys are trying oh hmm marriage palava up and down hmm

Ozzyk:
I tried at first to reason with her excuses throughout last month until last week that it doesn't seem to make sense anymore....
When I talk say she go talk say she no ready give in until after 9 months
You won't even notice that she's pregnant yet
She's very active at her work place, goes to chuch regularly, markets, cook and other day to day activities

Even after the 9 months you'll experience worst things to come she would not be mentally, emotionally ready now is your chance to handle this issue before you become married but strangers

Ozzyk:
➜I tried at first to reason with her excuses throughout last month until last week that it doesn't seem to make sense anymore.... When I talk say she go talk say she no ready give in until after 9 months. You won't even notice that she's pregnant yet. She's very active at her work place, goes to chuch regularly, markets, cook and other day to day activities

Have you tried taking some activities off her daily plate to see if that would help her relax and be more at ease with the possible anxieties that surround pregnancy?

Ozzyk:
Thank you... The regular sex was only for 10 days before she missed her period
And ever since then there has been nothing like that

Distance relationship of 2 years? No touching or anything in those 2 years. I hope you didn't marry "I settle" woman.

Do you think she loves or likes you? How was her behavior towards you during the wedding planning, wedding and after the wedding?

How was the 10 day kna.ck? Did it show that she loves you?

I'm on 6 weeks leave immediately after our wedding
She resumes work the 3rd week after our wedding
Whenever she goes to work I do the cooking, and cleaning and other basic home duties before she comes back from work.
By the time she comes back she'd just eat press phone and sleep
But still all these doesn't yield anything positive
I stopped doing the home works since it yields nothing

Kobojunkie:
Have you tried taking some activities off her daily plate to see if that would help her relax and be more at ease with the possible anxieties that surround pregnancy?

Ozzyk:
➜I'm on 6 weeks leave immediately after our wedding She resumes work the 3rd week after our wedding Whenever she goes to work I do the cooking, and cleaning and other basic home duties before she comes back from work.
By the time she comes back she'd just eat press phone and sleep But still all these doesn't yield anything positive

These ideas do not work magic but do help in some way. Something tells me that the issue may be psychological. How old is the woman in question?

It's not long distance we were like 30 minutes drive away from each other
We see anytime we want to
She just decided no sex before marriage
Perhaps we do kiss, smooch and all sorts except penetration

Helpout12345:
Distance relationship of 2 years? No touching or anything in those 2 years. I hope you didn't marry "I settle" woman.

Do you think she loves or likes you? How was her behavior towards you during the wedding planning, wedding and after the wedding?

How was the 10 day kna.ck? Did it show that she loves you?

26

Kobojunkie:
These ideas do not work magic but do help in some way. Something tells me that the issue may be psychological. How old is the woman in question?

Ozzyk:
26

And your age bracket?

Ozzyk:
It's not long distance we were like 30 minutes drive away from each other
We see anytime we want to
She just decided no sex before marriage
Perhaps we do kiss, smooch and all sorts except penetration

Good. Do you think she loves or likes you as a person? Not just because of comfort, provision you bring or can bring in future?

I once heard that when some women take in, they tend to loose interest for sex based on the hormone responsible for that. You can go ahead and seek for medical help

Ozzyk:
I tried at first to reason with her excuses throughout last month until last week that it doesn't seem to make sense anymore....
When I talk say she go talk say she no ready give in until after 9 months
You won't even notice that she's pregnant yet
She's very active at her work place, goes to chuch regularly, markets, cook and other day to day activities

How old is this woman, her immaturity stinks here. The boldness to tell your husband no sex for 9 months

Ozzyk:
I'm on 6 weeks leave immediately after our wedding
She resumes work the 3rd week after our wedding
Whenever she goes to work I do the cooking, and cleaning and other basic home duties before she comes back from work.
By the time she comes back she'd just eat press phone and sleep
But still all these doesn't yield anything positive
I stopped doing the home works since it yields nothing

You guys should book a session with a qualified marriage counsellor

lovemaths:
➜You guys should book a session with a qualified marriage counsellor

I think it is still early in the relationship for that. I was going to recommend a psychiatric evaluation if it turns out the woman is somewhat overwhelmed by it all.

I just shock when she said that... It doesn't make a single element of sense

ReacherSaidNoth:
How old is this woman, her immaturity stinks here. The boldness to tell your husband no sex for 9 months

Overwhelmed by what exactly??
Her pregnancy doesn't stop her from doing her day to day activities
She goes to work, goes to market, do her business, goes to church for rehearsals and on Sundays
She does everything pretty good except bedroom duties
So far her pregnancy symptoms is very mild
No vomiting, no spitting, no high temperature
Just loss of food appetite sometimes....

Kobojunkie:
I think it is still early in the relationship for that. I was going to recommend a psychiatric evaluation if it turns out the woman is somewhat overwhelmed by it all.

You have to find out what tickles her fancy. Your wife is not a wood, so her body must move for something.

Hypnotise:
You have to find out what tickles her fancy. Your wife is not a wood, so her body must move for something.

All these research work just for her to perform her matrimonial role

Ozzyk:
➜Overwhelmed by what exactly?? Her pregnancy doesn't stop her from doing her day to day activities. She goes to work, goes to market, do her business, goes to church for rehearsals and on Sundays. She does everything pretty good [/b]except bedroom duties. [b]So far her pregnancy symptoms is very mild. No vomiting, no spitting, no high temperature. Just loss of food appetite sometimes....

This is ignorant speak coming from a human being in 2025. Pregnancy affects women differently. Rather than make these statements, I suggest you go get books on pregnancy to study, so you don't destroy your woman with your ignorance.

I had initially wanted to ask that maybe you should both spend time discussing how she feels in general about the pregnancy, but given your response, I suggest that she maybe have conversations with her mother, father, or other more open-minded women around her instead about these things. And if it turns out she is not handling it well mentally, she should see a professional mental health counselor asap.

We were in love with each other really....
It was obvious
This whole thing is making us become mere housemates who only share thesame bed....
No connection, no bond

Helpout12345:
Good. Do you think she loves or likes you as a person? Not just because of comfort, provision you bring or can bring in future?

Jozilinn:
Try smooches and warm embraces look into her eyes and tell her you love her,groom her teach her how to knack guy forget ,groom your wife you know that firstly sex is not enjoyable especially if the woman is a virgin and doesn't get experiences after na you go dey carry her go iCloud with different styles after that buy her better gift and knack Better dressing on yourself,smell nice and don't too bother her she'll be craving for your attention.

You guys are trying oh hmm marriage palava up and down hmm

You people are the ones enabling these women. He might as well build her a temple and worship her.

Affection in any relationship should be mutual, not one party acting slavishly to win approval