₦airaland Forum

You dey mind that one...
My wife does have very very mild symptoms
She goes about her normal day life as if it's nothing
U won't even notice that she's pregnant yet and she's about 7 weeks gone...
The last time we had anything together was first week of September
And that's like 2 weeks after our wedding
It's been 5 weeks of no sex no touching,no cuddling, no kiss no smooching nothing like intimacy no matter how small u can think of it

chidiokay:
. Aunty your paragraph no make any sense, you courted that was a enough time to process and prepare your mind & body for whats to come

when you say " I do" it means you have reached the final stage of processing and you are ready for whats to come, i can you be having unprotected sex n still be shocked getting pregnant ... doesnt make sense

There is an issue inside her she is not just spilling out, she is only using the pregnancy as a cover

Every other you wrote, honestly i wont want to insult you But whats that a man that had 2yrs patience no sex is still the villian inside marriage cos he asked for sex

Ozzyk:
Her symptoms is very very mild
She goes about her normal day to day activities
She's pretty much fine except that she sleeps often and eat less no vomiting, no fever, no fatigue, no spit no nausea, she barely even had mood swings.....
It's just not about the sex from my end too
But no form of intimacy no matter how small
No kissing, no touching, no smooching,no cuddling
No connection no bond at all
We're just living like housemates
Makes me wonder if her pregnancy only stopped her from being intimate with me but not her day to day activities
Sincerely you won't even notice she's pregnant by seeing her
She's very very active, doesn't look she's over a month pregnant at all
Her stomach is very much flat

for the first time i see a sound, educated and mature sweet guy in Nairaland. Mehhhhh..... I like the way you talk.

chidiokay:
. Aunty your paragraph no make any sense, you courted that was a enough time to process and prepare your mind & body for whats to come

when you say " I do" it means you have reached the final stage of processing and you are ready for whats to come, i can you be having unprotected sex n still be shocked getting pregnant ... doesnt make sense

There is an issue inside her she is not just spilling out, she is only using the pregnancy as a cover

Every other you wrote, honestly i wont want to insult you But whats that a man that had 2yrs patience no sex is still the villian inside marriage cos he asked for sex

When you only view a woman’s worth as sex and babies then nothing I say will make sense to you. Two people have become one but as far as a man is concerned that only means sex! Her emotion, psychological, and physical needs don’t matter because you don’t view her as a human being.

The part that blows my mind is that women who enjoy sex and are willing to express their sexuality are tagged farm tools and denied marriage. You search out virgins and demand that they enjoy sex and are willing to preform sexual acts like corn stars. Do you see the pattern. Women are only seen through the lens of sex and are stripped of their humanity by most men.

None of this will make sense to you so enjoy your day.

DMerciful:
A man should not go a week without having sex twice if he wants to remains healthy physically, emotionally and spiritually.

When my wife was pregnant thrice, we had regular sex upto the seventh or eight month so I don't understand how 3 weeks pregnancy becomes excuse to not perform your conjugal duties yet going to work everyday.

How can a young married man of two months be sex starved when single guys that are not taking care of a wive and their family responsibilities enjoy sex three times per week? This is pure injustice

Women insists on one man one wife yet cannot do the work of satisfying the man, a work that three or more women did for our forefathers

Work is essential and I think it is too early to judge. In my first pregnancy I had no nausea. With my minion I had HG. No two pregnancy or women are the same.

Yes, I agree sex is essential. Not just for the man. Even as a woman I don't tolerate lack of it from him. But it is too early to judge or conclude she is trying to manipulate him. Like I said to him, I do not think a woman can start-off this way in 2 months.

He can marry a second wife if he wants. I understand polygamy if one party fails to fulfill his/her conjugal duties. Someone has to help you. Lol @ injustice. 😂😂😂

GloriousGbola:
https://www.nairaland.com/ozzyk/topics

i thought he is BSing but now i'm not sure. dont think he is a nurse sha - he just works in a federal hospital

I checked before commenting because people dey too trigger us for this NL and saw he actually works in a hospital. So he can be anything, including a nurse.

jrobbins:
You don't know this women. Very manipulative things but I don't even know why most men don't see it.

He should get side chick or threaten her with marrying second wife. I have two wives and I have ever experienced this kinda things.

i would have said same thing, but i discern OP is not the infidelity nd personally i dont push men that dont have it in them

Getting a mistress wont solve the problem @home OP is just bypassing, the problem will still be there, its best to fix it

There is no such thing as women dont like sex, the man around is not enough turn off nii, i believe there is an underlying issue that needs to be psychologically dealt with

Hamasblokers1:
It's normal bro to some ladies especially vergins

After she give birth na u go run from sex demand because her sex life will multiply and increase her libido
It happened to my wife too

Two weeks after wedding ur woman no allow u touch am, ur woman tell u say u have to wait 9months, ur woman, ur woman was happy shutting u down showing no care while u keep washing plates and cooking food when she went to work only for her to come home , eat, press gone, and sleep? Shay naso ur woman treat u? Nonsense

brain54:
If you waited for 2 years of courtship...

You should put back your waiting cap for 9 months of pregnancy.

By the way I am not a fan of no sex before marriage for the simple reason of sexual compatibility.

I believe these are part of things that should be observed during courtship.

Just be decent about it and not use it as excuse for waywardness!

I was not a fan too but i yielded to my wife insistent and yes she was a virgin. And i can tell you now that it affected the marriage afterwards

Diamond098454:
But you have been sleeping with her throughout your courtship a month of no sex won't kill you

Did you read the post at all?

Ozzyk:
We got married in ending of August
We didn't have anything to do together at all during our 2 year courtship
She's really adorable and a Godly babe to the core
On the second night of our wedding I confirmed she was a virgin
Sadly our honeymoon only lasted Barely 2 weeks before she missed her period
Here is the issue;
Since over a month and some few weeks now she won't let me touch her, in fact it's like my touches irritate her, no sex, no kiss, no smooching, no touching
It sometimes feels we're just house mates who shares same matrimonial bed together
I have tried to talk to her many times about my sexual wellness but she seems not interested at all
My marriage is less than 2 months and I am already over a month sex starved
Perhaps she sometimes complains of pregnancy cramps but this should not com at the detriment of my sexual well being.....
And besides she's goes to work everyday but the moments she gets home she won't let me touch not even slight touches not to talk of sex or romance....
I am already tired 😩

e be like say you no well, wetin dey worry you? You need to go for counseling so they can educate you about first pregnancy, leave that woman alone till after six months before touching her and then you by six months you must touch her if you don't want to spend money for CS, but for now she will be irritated to her, infact you will look like a shit to her, your odour smells bad to her, infact congratulations because you won't need to spend money on DNA, that's confirmation that you are the father. It happens to me during my first born pregnancy but I was mature then

Double0h7:
When you only view a woman’s worth as sex and babies then nothing I say will make sense to you. Two people have become one but as far as a man is concerned that only means sex! Her emotion, psychological, and physical needs don’t matter because you don’t view her as a human being.

The part that blows my mind is that women who enjoy sex and are willing to express their sexuality are tagged farm tools and denied marriage. You search out virgins and demand that they enjoy sex and are willing to preform sexual acts like corn stars. Do you see the pattern. Women are only seen through the lens of sex and are stripped of their humanity by most men.

None of this will make sense to you so enjoy your day.

Maybe if it was a dickhead like me that brought the case you might have small point, 2yrs no sex kuku kill me

buh i must say OP deserves better esp. in our time He waited 2yrs, not just that even in marriage,q he is responsible ... he washes the plate, cook, take care of the home so the woman doesnt stress when she comes back from work ... ki lobinrin tun fe ?

Na me you deserve , community preek i will show you responsible shege ... cos all that manipulating games you women play no go work

Ozzyk:
I tried at first to reason with her excuses throughout last month until last week that it doesn't seem to make sense anymore....
When I talk say she go talk say she no ready give in until after 9 months
You won't even notice that she's pregnant yet
She's very active at her work place, goes to chuch regularly, markets, cook and other day to day activities

How old is your wife?? And was it solely becos she was a virgin you guys didnt try copulate for 2 years during courtship based on no sex until marriage agreement??

Ozzyk:
I tried at first to reason with her excuses throughout last month until last week that it doesn't seem to make sense anymore....
When I talk say she go talk say she no ready give in until after 9 months
You won't even notice that she's pregnant yet
She's very active at her work place, goes to chuch regularly, markets, cook and other day to day activities

if she don born, do DNA first.

motymop:
If she missed her period about two weeks after your wedding night, it might be a bit early for a pregnancy to be detected by a missed period because ovulation and conception usually happen midcycle. But it's still possible if timing aligns.

If she’s complaining of pregnancy cramps but hasn’t confirmed pregnancy with a test, it’s possible she’s dealing with something physical hormonal changes, health issues or maybe even anxiety or stress that’s affecting her libido and willingness to be intimate with you.

you don't know anything, go and sit down, what you are saying does not tally with the post

Ozzyk:
We got married in ending of August
We didn't have anything to do together at all during our 2 year courtship
She's really adorable and a Godly babe to the core
On the second night of our wedding I confirmed she was a virgin
Sadly our honeymoon only lasted Barely 2 weeks before she missed her period
Here is the issue;
Since over a month and some few weeks now she won't let me touch her, in fact it's like my touches irritate her, no sex, no kiss, no smooching, no touching
It sometimes feels we're just house mates who shares same matrimonial bed together
I have tried to talk to her many times about my sexual wellness but she seems not interested at all
My marriage is less than 2 months and I am already over a month sex starved
Perhaps she sometimes complains of pregnancy cramps but this should not com at the detriment of my sexual well being.....
And besides she's goes to work everyday but the moments she gets home she won't let me touch not even slight touches not to talk of sex or romance....
I am already tired 😩

Ask her if it's okay to discuss the issue with her mum.

She's sex baiting you..

why would you allow her to be treating you like you're a Simp!

You've just failed your shit testing and you can't renage her from this kind stunt, you should expect worse scenarios to unfold after birth

Smithwilliams826:
if she don born, do DNA first.

all you kindergarten boys don't know anything about women pregnancy,

chidiokay:
Maybe if it was a dickhead like me that brought the case you might have small point, 2yrs no sex kuku kill me

buh i must OP say deserves better esp. in our time He waited 2yrs, not just that even in marriage,q he is responsible ... he washes the plate, cook, take care of the home so the woman doesnt stress when she comes back from work ... ki lobinrin tun fe ?

Na me you deserve , community preek i will show you responsible shege ... cos all that manipulating games you women play no go work

You’re proving my point. Y’all don’t like women and society won’t allow you to work through this so you take love and relationships as some battlefield. A man cooks and cleans in his own home because he wants sex. If it wasn’t sad it would be hilarious. Anyway, I’m done with this thread so ✌️

Gwam:
She's sex baiting you..

why would you allow her to be treating you like you're a Simp!

You've just failed your shit testing and you can't renage her from this kind stunt, you should expect worse scenarios to unfold after birth

you people are just ignorant of how pregnancy works, you people are not mature at all

NiRfreak:
Oga. This is not right at all
At the beginning of what should be your bonding time, she's playing games and manipulation....
These are what you should do.

1. Erase the fact you have in your head that she's godly or good or virgin. Erase it. It no longer count. Otherwise you won't be able to act as a man, even when u are hurting, ur emotional side will be emasculating you..
.
2. Approach the situation practically and zero your mind completely away from having sex with her. At least before marriage u dint die without sex. So don't let her use the sex card to turn u to her slave.
.
3. Insist on pregnancy test
4. Insist on DNA test after 9 months..... Just to get on her nerves and make her agitated that you may not trust her.
5 Don't try to please her, do the barest minimum and no special treat. I beg you, no special treat or outing meant to curry favor.
6 play the same game she's playing. And don't bother her for sex... and don't seek her attention.
7 don't sleep in same room at night..go sleep in the second room.
8 Create scene and lambast her if she tries to gaslight you or flip the script on you for behaving mean towards her. A woman should be able to see your anger expressed as a man when she crosses certain lie. Even if u can't express anger.. voice and act it... No go dey do gentle man for this situation o

Over times she will sit up if she realises u are not taking her manipulation.

But I bet you can't do this because u still see her as a saint who has ur best interest.. Lol.. But she's there manipulating you and trying to be the boss over you. If u don't flip the script, she will turn ur boss, u will have to obey anything she says, and she will make you beg for everything in that marriage

As a Delta man, na my natural reaction be this

Ozzyk:
We got married in ending of August
We didn't have anything to do together at all during our 2 year courtship
She's really adorable and a Godly babe to the core
On the second night of our wedding I confirmed she was a virgin
Sadly our honeymoon only lasted Barely 2 weeks before she missed her period
Here is the issue;
Since over a month and some few weeks now she won't let me touch her, in fact it's like my touches irritate her, no sex, no kiss, no smooching, no touching
It sometimes feels we're just house mates who shares same matrimonial bed together
I have tried to talk to her many times about my sexual wellness but she seems not interested at all
My marriage is less than 2 months and I am already over a month sex starved
Perhaps she sometimes complains of pregnancy cramps but this should not com at the detriment of my sexual well being.....
And besides she's goes to work everyday but the moments she gets home she won't let me touch not even slight touches not to talk of sex or romance....
I am already tired 😩

See a marriage counselor.

You both need it: you cannot solve the problem form your own end alone if she isn't part of the solution

brain54:
If you waited for 2 years of courtship...

You should put back your waiting cap for 9 months of pregnancy.

By the way I am not a fan of no sex before marriage for the simple reason of sexual compatibility.

I believe these are part of things that should be observed during courtship.

Just be decent about it and not use it as excuse for waywardness!

There is nothing like sexual compatibility!
Sex for a woman changes with her situation eg. Age, Wellness, Timing, Economy, Emotions etc.

A Nymph before marriage may switch off completely after. There is NO guarantee sir

Diamond098454:
what? I didn't read it , wow....... He tried oooo he shouldn't worry with time everything will be okay

He really did...not all men can withstand it including me. I hope the lady won't regret this action of hers.

If at this stage she dont like it, when she go come like am? Na when she don born wey the t0t0 don gbim?

We do other stuffs sometimes except penetration
But she insisted on no sex until marriage as per say she be virgin and I respect her opinion since we're planning to get married anyways

Denko2721987:
How old is your wife?? And was it solely becos she was a virgin you guys didnt try copulate for 2 years during courtship based on no sex until marriage agreement??

NiRfreak:
Oga. This is not right at all
At the beginning of what should be your bonding time, she's playing games and manipulation....
These are what you should do.

1. Erase the fact you have in your head that she's godly or good or virgin. Erase it. It no longer count. Otherwise you won't be able to act as a man, even when u are hurting, ur emotional side will be emasculating you..
.
2. Approach the situation practically and zero your mind completely away from having sex with her. At least before marriage u dint die without sex. So don't let her use the sex card to turn u to her slave.
.
3. Insist on pregnancy test
4. Insist on DNA test after 9 months..... Just to get on her nerves and make her agitated that you may not trust her.
5 Don't try to please her, do the barest minimum and no special treat. I beg you, no special treat or outing meant to curry favor.
6 play the same game she's playing. And don't bother her for sex... and don't seek her attention.
7 don't sleep in same room at night..go sleep in the second room.
8 Create scene and lambast her if she tries to gaslight you or flip the script on you for behaving mean towards her. A woman should be able to see your anger expressed as a man when she crosses certain lie. Even if u can't express anger.. voice and act it... No go dey do gentle man for this situation o

Over times she will sit up if she realises u are not taking her manipulation.

But I bet you can't do this because u still see her as a saint who has ur best interest.. Lol.. But she's there manipulating you and trying to be the boss over you. If u don't flip the script, she will turn ur boss, u will have to obey anything she says, and she will make you beg for everything in that marriage

This man... Wicked advice but it might work.

Just withdrawal of attention and most women will go crazy. If Oga take this ya advice, awa iyawo go know say oga don vex..

Give like another month to come around,and if she is still adamant you will have to inform her mother about her attitude. also is in her best interest to have regular sex since u said you guys have only had sex twice if not to deliver na wahala oo except through cs.

lebete3000:
Just kuku tell the man to divorce her jarey.
All this games because of kpekus wey you invest time, money and energy in marrying is not necessetri.

The signs wey there but the guy was naive with women.

He should count his losses, learn his lessons and move on.

Bro, it may sound mean, but let me tell you, this is the beginning of a marriage, and whatever a guy allow early on will be the template the home will be run by.
Imagine he's already washing plate and cooking food for a woman that doesn't even acknowledge his existence. Isn't that a wrong move for a 6 weeks marriage?
.
He also needs to assert his own rule, and man must not totally bend to a woman's rule, u too must form your own rule and stand by it.
He must not wash plate again..... Washing plate for two people should not be a task for a new wife... Even if she went to work.....
.
If she dint show affection, there's no need for the man to turn himself to a simp in his own house trying to seek attention like house boy, pleading, and buying gift for a new wife.. Haba.. Nonsense...

He should play his own game too. That's my point. Otherwise, the woman will take advantage and control.... While shes setting her boundaries, the man should also make her know he too has a boundary that not even pregnancy or hormone will make him change it...... It's important so that see finish no go dey, and the woman will know her man isn't a man to manipulate without counter consequences.
There must be consequence set in place for every abnormal action .. So that she won't start thinking she can make abnormal action the norm

Ozzyk:
We got married in ending of August
We didn't have anything to do together at all during our 2 year courtship
She's really adorable and a Godly babe to the core
On the second night of our wedding I confirmed she was a virgin
Sadly our honeymoon only lasted Barely 2 weeks before she missed her period
Here is the issue;
Since over a month and some few weeks now she won't let me touch her, in fact it's like my touches irritate her, no sex, no kiss, no smooching, no touching
It sometimes feels we're just house mates who shares same matrimonial bed together
I have tried to talk to her many times about my sexual wellness but she seems not interested at all
My marriage is less than 2 months and I am already over a month sex starved
Perhaps she sometimes complains of pregnancy cramps but this should not com at the detriment of my sexual well being.....
And besides she's goes to work everyday but the moments she gets home she won't let me touch not even slight touches not to talk of sex or romance....
I am already tired 😩

Give her time. It happens to some women. By her 2nd trimester the whole thing will change. Her body is like someone wey don chop belle full and u dey offer d person more food.

Ozzyk:
i dey mind that one...
My wife does have very very mild symptoms
She goes about her normal day life as if it's nothing
U won't even notice that she's pregnant yet and she's about 7 weeks gone...
The last time we had anything together was first week of September
And that's like 2 weeks after our wedding
It's been 5 weeks of no sex no touching,no cuddling, no kiss no smooching nothing like intimacy no matter how small u can think of it

You tried ooo ! asides being a responsible man i can see you really love,. thats a problem you married a woman you love more, its best to be with a woman that loves you more you will know

however problems have solutions ... bro you need a 3rd party cos she wont tell you things directly, maybe a mummy G.o, best friend or someone you know she looks up to

i strongly believe your marriage can be fixed, its just communication glitch stay strong bro

Ozzyk:
You can't compare your symptoms with hers...
Hers is very very mild
She goes about her normal day to day activities
She's pretty much fine except that she sleeps often and eat less no vomiting, no fever, no fatigue, no spit no nausea.....
It's just not about the sex from my end too
But no form of intimacy no matter how small
No kissing, no touching, no smooching,no cuddling
No connection no bond at all
We're just living like housemates
Makes me wonder if her pregnancy only stopped her from being intimate with me but not her day to day activities

Yes, it can stop her from being intimate with you while going about daily activities. It can even make her resent you, but since you (a nurse) and some others (experienced happily married men/fathers) are convinced she is being wicked, I think you might consider taking their advice.

Happy married life to you and her. ❤️

9 pages already. Once it concerns relationship or see.xx see speed Nigerian youth will use to decend on the post. But if its something that concerns their future as citizens of this nation the thread no fit pass 2 pages
Lazy Lousy Youth