₦airaland Forum

Kobojunkie:
By her biological clock, you mean that while she is complaining that she is unable to fend for her current family, and yet to gain financial independence at the same time, she should also be considering how literally add another mouth to the queue for her to feed? Isn't that literally advice that is coming from a place of hate?

2. You have seen many women who struggling to pull themselves and their families about of poverty, and you think insisting they find ways to add to their suffering is the advice to give them ? Why? Have the many men out there with kids successfully fed their kids that you would think to send more women into having more babies into the mix? 🥱🥱

yemmit90:
➜A woman that can feed herself while single can do well in marriage. You talk as if she will be the only one that will shouldered all the responsibilities in the marriage.
➜ With understanding family oriented man, she will only support with little she can.
➜ Besides, she can't be providing for them forever, like she said, two of them has already done with their studies and currently learning a skill. If she really love herself, she should not allow her burdens to prevent her growth too.

MistyDense:
I don't know if anyone of you can relate to this. But to be truthful, I can't continue taking up these multiple responsibilities anymore.

I'm the oldest of four younger siblings, and we just have one Male among us, who is the Last born. I'm training him in sch, a tertiary institution. The other two girls are already done with their school and are presently learning some skills.
None is contributing anything. I work from Mondays to Sundays without Rest. From house rent to feeding, to medics, transport, sch fees, light bills and others, I do all of them. I make sure I work to earn every penny I make. It is so bad that I don't have any savings. My clothes are worn out cos I can't afford new ones. Also, I can't afford my soap and cream any longer because there are more pressing issues to fix.
The burden has become so much, coupled with stress from work. Sometimes I overthink things and breakdown.
My mum isn't working due to her sight. She's completely Without sight. I had to hire someone to be taking care of her as we all go out for our daily activities.
I'm thinking of asking my younger brother to drop out for now so that the burden can reduce for now, but I don't know how to tell him because I don't know how he would feel. He's already in 200L.. It will break him I know, but I'm trying to cut cost at least for a year first, before he can return back to sch. If this happens, I fear he may take his life, due to the passion he has for sch. He's a very bright student. The most academically sound person in my family.

A lot of pressure is on me. I don't want to do what other girls are doing. I don't want to start sleeping with men for money because I need to protect my dignity as a woman until I'm married. I've turned down a lot of suitors already because I don't want to drag them into my family's struggles and later they start insulting me for being a burden to them. I refused to marry for now because of this.
Life isn't easy and hasn't being easy since the loss of our dad 10years ago.

Sometimes, I stay in my room and cry all through the night. I can't share my struggles with anyone for fear of being mocked and insulted behind my back.
Sometimes I feel like running far away that nobody will be able to see me or even call my lines.
I'm really messed up.
At times, I feel like I should just vanish from the surface of the earth.

I'm just confused.

Nlfpmod

MistyDense:
I don't know if anyone of you can relate to this. But to be truthful, I can't continue taking up these multiple responsibilities anymore.

I'm the oldest of four younger siblings, and we just have one Male among us, who is the Last born. I'm training him in sch, a tertiary institution. The other two girls are already done with their school and are presently learning some skills.
None is contributing anything. I work from Mondays to Sundays without Rest. From house rent to feeding, to medics, transport, sch fees, light bills and others, I do all of them. I make sure I work to earn every penny I make. It is so bad that I don't have any savings. My clothes are worn out cos I can't afford new ones. Also, I can't afford my soap and cream any longer because there are more pressing issues to fix.
The burden has become so much, coupled with stress from work. Sometimes I overthink things and breakdown.
My mum isn't working due to her sight. She's completely Without sight. I had to hire someone to be taking care of her as we all go out for our daily activities.
I'm thinking of asking my younger brother to drop out for now so that the burden can reduce for now, but I don't know how to tell him because I don't know how he would feel. He's already in 200L.. It will break him I know, but I'm trying to cut cost at least for a year first, before he can return back to sch. If this happens, I fear he may take his life, due to the passion he has for sch. He's a very bright student. The most academically sound person in my family.

A lot of pressure is on me. I don't want to do what other girls are doing. I don't want to start sleeping with men for money because I need to protect my dignity as a woman until I'm married. I've turned down a lot of suitors already because I don't want to drag them into my family's struggles and later they start insulting me for being a burden to them. I refused to marry for now because of this.
Life isn't easy and hasn't being easy since the loss of our dad 10years ago.

Sometimes, I stay in my room and cry all through the night. I can't share my struggles with anyone for fear of being mocked and insulted behind my back.
Sometimes I feel like running far away that nobody will be able to see me or even call my lines.
I'm really messed up.
At times, I feel like I should just vanish from the surface of the earth.

I'm just confused.

Nlfpmod

NemoDatQuod:
@pocoha..ntas
Thank you very much. I am a sucker for sad stories. I was going to spend loads of money on her and her brother just now until I saw your post. She did not refute or rebut or clarify your post. Rather, from reading further down, it seems she blocked you.

We have to find a way of making sure these stories are actually true. I usually simply act when my spirit moves me. My spirit moved me greatly on this one and now it turns out to be a story from someone's imagination. I guess I was moved because I can relate with helping several family members not just to gain university admissions both in Nigeria and abroad, but also to pay their fees and accommodation for several years, despite being the younger person.

Those hoping on being remembered by siblings they help should perish such thoughts. We are a generation of the ungrateful. I have siblings who are older than me who studied abroad at my expense and live in Europe and North America today, but who are so ungrateful that it is near unimaginable. If I am the type with the constitution to help in expectation of reward, there would have been very serious conflicts by now. Don't do "shishi" in expectation of reward. Do it because you enjoy helping when you can.

I need to stop trusting my spirit when it moves me.

MistyDense:
I don't know if anyone of you can relate to this. But to be truthful, I can't continue taking up these multiple responsibilities anymore.

I'm the oldest of four younger siblings, and we just have one Male among us, who is the Last born. I'm training him in sch, a tertiary institution. The other two girls are already done with their school and are presently learning some skills.
None is contributing anything. I work from Mondays to Sundays without Rest. From house rent to feeding, to medics, transport, sch fees, light bills and others, I do all of them. I make sure I work to earn every penny I make. It is so bad that I don't have any savings. My clothes are worn out cos I can't afford new ones. Also, I can't afford my soap and cream any longer because there are more pressing issues to fix.
The burden has become so much, coupled with stress from work. Sometimes I overthink things and breakdown.
My mum isn't working due to her sight. She's completely Without sight. I had to hire someone to be taking care of her as we all go out for our daily activities.
I'm thinking of asking my younger brother to drop out for now so that the burden can reduce for now, but I don't know how to tell him because I don't know how he would feel. He's already in 200L.. It will break him I know, but I'm trying to cut cost at least for a year first, before he can return back to sch. If this happens, I fear he may take his life, due to the passion he has for sch. He's a very bright student. The most academically sound person in my family.

A lot of pressure is on me. I don't want to do what other girls are doing. I don't want to start sleeping with men for money because I need to protect my dignity as a woman until I'm married. I've turned down a lot of suitors already because I don't want to drag them into my family's struggles and later they start insulting me for being a burden to them. I refused to marry for now because of this.
Life isn't easy and hasn't being easy since the loss of our dad 10years ago.

Sometimes, I stay in my room and cry all through the night. I can't share my struggles with anyone for fear of being mocked and insulted behind my back.
Sometimes I feel like running far away that nobody will be able to see me or even call my lines.
I'm really messed up.
At times, I feel like I should just vanish from the surface of the earth.

I'm just confused.

Nlfpmod

MistyDense:
I don't know if anyone of you can relate to this. But to be truthful, I can't continue taking up these multiple responsibilities anymore.

I'm the oldest of four younger siblings, and we just have one Male among us, who is the Last born. I'm training him in sch, a tertiary institution. The other two girls are already done with their school and are presently learning some skills.
None is contributing anything. I work from Mondays to Sundays without Rest. From house rent to feeding, to medics, transport, sch fees, light bills and others, I do all of them. I make sure I work to earn every penny I make. It is so bad that I don't have any savings. My clothes are worn out cos I can't afford new ones. Also, I can't afford my soap and cream any longer because there are more pressing issues to fix.
The burden has become so much, coupled with stress from work. Sometimes I overthink things and breakdown.
My mum isn't working due to her sight. She's completely Without sight. I had to hire someone to be taking care of her as we all go out for our daily activities.
I'm thinking of asking my younger brother to drop out for now so that the burden can reduce for now, but I don't know how to tell him because I don't know how he would feel. He's already in 200L.. It will break him I know, but I'm trying to cut cost at least for a year first, before he can return back to sch. If this happens, I fear he may take his life, due to the passion he has for sch. He's a very bright student. The most academically sound person in my family.

A lot of pressure is on me. I don't want to do what other girls are doing. I don't want to start sleeping with men for money because I need to protect my dignity as a woman until I'm married. I've turned down a lot of suitors already because I don't want to drag them into my family's struggles and later they start insulting me for being a burden to them. I refused to marry for now because of this.
Life isn't easy and hasn't being easy since the loss of our dad 10years ago.

Sometimes, I stay in my room and cry all through the night. I can't share my struggles with anyone for fear of being mocked and insulted behind my back.
Sometimes I feel like running far away that nobody will be able to see me or even call my lines.
I'm really messed up.
At times, I feel like I should just vanish from the surface of the earth.

I'm just confused.

Nlfpmod