₦airaland Forum

CoronaVirusPro:
Bitter and honest truth!

Men with one wife are the saddest, demoralized, lonely and isolated creatures on Earth.

If marriage vows were to be renewable, 99% of men won’t renew it. They will run for their dear life’s.

Any statistics

bamosagie:
#



Then women should be allowed to have more than one husband at a time too. or dont they deserve balance also.....

If it’s possible, then it’s valid.

Funny man

nkwoemeka:
I think he should look at the condition of the road that leads from Onitsha ugbo to Ewohimi, after onitsha ugbo, the next town is his, the suffering commuters experience on the road is horrible, and it won't take much to put the road right. He can marry as many as he wishes.

Exactly that road leads to Abuja. I was surprised when I saw a picture saying he has done idumuje ugboko road, I said is this one their town road, or the continuation of the one connecting onicha ugbo to ewohimi.

ViceGovernor:
Na lie, the only factor that has kept men from displaying their polygamous nature is insufficiency of funds.

1978, February 20. Fela Anikulapo married 27 wives in one day.
He's my road 🛣️ model 😂😆.

You should think about marrying at least 3 wives too....think about all the fun 😊

You are very funny o! But true, the economy is also a factor but wisdom is profitable to direct.

ibedun:
We are already EVOLVING beyond marriage just that most people have not noticed.

Marriage was created by man, it never was a natural order (forget religious mind control)

Honestly... When I stumbled on the same post on a Tiktok page..I wept on behalf of humans...
Ah...I had to agree with people that said it's meant to be renewable after a certain time frame..If it's not working, Both parties should move on .
Well, may God help us all .

ibedun:
We are already EVOLVING beyond marriage just that most people have not noticed.

Marriage was created by man, it never was a natural order (forget religious mind control)

Wouldn't agree to that...It was a natural order.Adam had eve as wife.Abraham had Sarah... Joseph had Mary..From time immemorial, there was marriage.. Even a wedding in cana was recorded..
Also, bible said...Two shall cleave as one..I heard it boldly on my wedding day too🤣🤣🤣

hush15:
There are valid points to all you said but it stand with Ned on this. I myself used to be in your school of thought. It is a delicate and sensitive topic that could be debated till the end of time but it all boils to the mindset. Polygamy has been since humans ever existed. Infact, I can bet my blocos that it was the start out that way how as life evolved people tried to redefine it. The Bible isn't against marrying more than one. The Bible only specified some certain people against marrying more than one and the purpose is obvious. If you want to follow God and take religious stance, it is more healthier to stick to one wife so you can serve God best, and that is in a situation where you can't resist. It was a recommendation by St. Paul. However, the preferred stance is not to even marry at all so you can focus on God solely and not be distracted. Jesus Christ himself said, when speaking with the man who want to follow him, that he must walk away from all the has, his wife, family, all of it and it was offered as a choice. If God is who God is, I wont be surprised if that guy still made heaven despite not wanting to walk away from all he had. Kingdoms that exist today were built on polygamy, let's not forget that too.

Whether one wife or more, marriage comes with its baggage and depending on how disciplined a man has been built, the level of responsibility he realizes is sitting on his shoulders and maturity he must display while still in the pursuit of God, its the level of same discipline that's is transferred into the marriage. You cannot give what you do have.

So the different type of marriage comes with its challenges. If you are a simp who has inferiority complexities, I recommend that you stick to one woman also but if you are the type that's is emotionally stable and has the capacity, competence and character, and want more, I dont think there is anything stopping you. There are many sides to this coin but remember, the more wives, the more you have to deal with. Its no easy path to thread but you can be happy if you forge the marriage right. I have seen men with one wives who were murdered by the same wives. I have seen men with two or more that are happier and better than those with one. Infact, those men are more alive. It doesnt mean they dont have their challenges too. Families quarrel, disagree but if well managed, it often work out well in the end. Just marry who you want for the right reasons and be bold to make sure you carry everybody along.

I can continue but it is already a long epistle. Make i stop here....

Your narrative is right but you have a point you are missing. That is statistical point. Take a statistics and make a conclusion. Again, we are in a modern world that have evolved past the olden days. Gone are those days when women are bound by laws, culture and religion. Gone are the days when a woman kneels before drinking in front of her husband. The past made polygamy easier for men.

If you go into polygamy now, you may live happy but your kids may have lots to work on. It may look nice to a man, but other parties will be cheated. This is the base of my argument. At least not in the modern educated world. The children and the wives really have issues to face. At least 70% of times, they will face challenges in such marriage

SpecialAdviser:
There is no bitter and honest truth in it. I dont know why many of you clap at every statement without deep research about it. Monogamy seems troublesome now because many of us never witnessed polygamy in practice. Every type of marriage comes with its own drama, you cannot just believe one is so perfect.

Below are some of the insights. For every marriage, three major parties are involved. Father, mother and children. Polygamy may look like benefiting men but the mothers and their children will be getting the hits.

1) Father: Yes options for sex. Options for loyalty etc
2) Children; Except the father is rich, may drop out of school. May witnessed constant problems at home, quarrels and envy most times. Go to northern Nigeria and see their kids. With all the money they steal in government, still the most backward region. There can never be a man that loves two women equal! Even God does nit love us equal. If not why did He chose Israel those days in the bible. Why was DAVID His friend? Why did Abraham chase out Hagar? For as long as you cannot love those wives equal, trouble sets in and the kids get the hits.

3) Mothers: Lack of attention, Unhealthy competition, Sometimes lacking sex, Their husbands gets the licenses to honourably chase women since they can bring in another wife. Go to Abuja and see how Alhajis chases young girls for sex. I have seen first wives suffer in Kano state and wonder if polygamy worts it. It looks like its succeeding in the north because most of the women are uneducated and religion also used to calm them. If your child drops out of school, its the will of God. My dad was born into a polygamous home. Very brilliant man. They called him uneducated professor but he never went to school. I still thank God my dad did not bring in another woman to compete with my mum all the time they had issues. It would have been a disaster. I would never have been educated and will still be suffering now. People are blind sha

Summarily, Its only selfish for men to believe their sexual satisfaction and attention is enough for marriages. Do you think of being born into polygamous homes? Most of us would not have attained our heights Most tich people will always make polygamy look perfect until you get into it as a poor man. Many people will argue that when you have another woman in the space of competition, it gets the first woman behaving well but this has always been FALSE. It actually gets the first woman CRAZY. The threat can get her behaving a BIT okay but not when the ACTION is carried out.

Just dey play

Our man Ned is blessed with the wealth to raise 100 of his biological offspring to university completion so he is entitled to marry as many beautiful women as his heart desires, and to father children by the score, since all of them will get a chance to earn a college degree.

As the man of the house with numerous women on call to the master bedroom, one can only imagine the exhilarating sexual adventures that Ned has enjoyed with his wives and part-time mistresses in his mansions and aboard his luxury aircraft.

Much as I would love to taste for just one day the perks of privilege with women that Ned enjoys routinely, I would stop at becoming polygamous, even if I woke up some day with adequate wealth to play the sheikh and marry a hareem of busty damsels. I fear polygamy because the jealousy and competition among the wives and their dependents could lead to the polygamist man getting poisoned to death by one or more of those wives who might have a hidden incentive to kill for profit.

No sir, with Ned's money, I would follow the herd by having just one wife for bearing and rearing kids, supplemented by numerous non-resident bikini-model girlfriends who will be placed on a monthly retainer to ensure they report for duty as and when summoned at the boss' whim.

Jakumo:
Our man Ned is blessed with the wealth to raise 100 of his biological offspring to university completion so he is entitled to marry as many beautiful women as his heart desires, and to father children by the score, since all of them will get a chance to earn a college degree.

As the man of the house with numerous women on call to the master bedroom, one can only imagine the exhilarating sexual adventures that Ned has enjoyed with his wives and part-time mistresses in his mansions and aboard his luxury aircraft.

Much as I would love to taste for just one day the perks of privilege with women that Ned enjoys routinely, I would stop at becoming polygamous, even if I woke up some day with adequate wealth to play the sheikh and marry a hareem of busty damsels. I fear polygamy because the jealousy and competition among the wives and their dependents could lead to the polygamist man getting poisoned to death by one or more of those wives who might have a hidden incentive to kill for profit.

No sir, with Ned's money, I would follow the herd by having just one wife for bearing and rearing kids, supplemented by numerous non-resident bikini-model girlfriends who will be placed on a monthly retainer to ensure they report for duty as and when summoned at the boss' whim.

😂😅😅. Lol. You are too much Jakumo. If you aren't doing so already, you need to write formally for public reading.

You'll surely earn from it whether writing philosophical dairy of personal experience, work of fiction or even your jocular take on non-fiction. "Busty damsels" 😂. 💪🏾

WizardOfNG:
😂😅😅. Lol. You are too much Jakumo. If you aren't doing so already, you need to write formally for public reading.

You'll surely earn from it whether writing philosophical dairy of personal experience, work of fiction or even your jocular take on non-fiction. "Busty damsels" 😂. 💪🏾

If I could find a way to earn a buck from writing, I would jump on it like a rabid junkyard dog, Wizard'of NG.

In the meantime I will present Oga Seun with another bill to compensate me for all the years of my life I devoted to writing in Nairaland.

Oga Seun please don't ignore this bill o. I will accept payment in Russian rubles if your naira cashflow is of concern at present.

God breast Nigeria.

WizardOfNG:
I think the person you address is wrong claiming men with one wife are "strongest". I believe you are wrong also claiming they are "weakest".

Especially per reason you give for your conclusion. I.e your talk of obstacles and challenges instilling "strenght".

Why expose yourself, in the first place, to obstacles and challenges when a lot of men who want to achieve more, with less problems, understand the importance of the adage "work smarter not harder" meaning it is better to stay away from avoidable obstacles and challenges polygamy is likely to present in comparison to monogamy?

Babily write up. I may only be right based on your own personal perspectives but in real life I don't agree with you BCS Your" succefull" doesn't have specific definations . Which will only be measured in only individual lives perspectives . Your 6 is 9 somewhere else. Only a Coward runs away from obstacles , A brave do the right things irespective of difficulties once you know it will give you value ,respect and Fruits in the future.

foodlum:
Bruh I aint changing nun. Intra-family disorderliness, chaos and rancor are just as rampant in monogamous households just as much as they are in polygamous households. The way you organize your household will determine how it turns out.

idrismodel:
You are referring to kids that are yet to understand life.

Are you saying that kids from monogamy family do not have reason to complain

Even kids that are from monogamy family also experience some happenings that make them blame their presents situation.

The ultimate reality is that when kids grows into maturity and become adults, they will realise that most of the childhood experiences were necessary to shape them into what they will become in life

I am from a polygamy family and I am grateful for the reality that my polygamy background had made me to realised

It is rare to come accross an adult from a polygamous family who'd tell you polygamy was great. (Not impossible but rare). Equally rare to see one from monogamy who wishes dad was polygamous.
Guy below summarizes it well.

dominique:
They don't care about the wives , they don't care about the kids, it's all about them. Very selfish creatures. The irony of it all is that they eventually suffer the consequences of that polygamy when they're in their advanced years.

Host78:
you're lying.

Most of us today have witnessed monogamy than polygamy.

In fact, to many Nigerians today, polygamy is a myth. One they are continously taught that it's bad and bad for the children.

Most have not seen a man with more than one wife and most can easily tell you the disadvantages of polygamy and the advantages of monogamy because that's all they've been taught from childhood.

Polygamy is great and children all went to school.

My uncle was a primary school teacher with 3 wives and all went to school.

I know of others like that. There are some who had just one wife and the kids don't go to school.

If the man wants to train his children he will regardless of the number of wives.

There are disadvantages also but for the man the advantages are more just that it has been painted black by our schools and our minds have been poisoned against it right from primary school

It doesn't take much thinking to see why a child in polygamy would hate it:
Because of polygamy, less money for you and your mother, less of your father's time for you and your mother. You can't help but envy those who have their dads and their dads' money and time all to themselves

jaszplus12:
You can understand he's talking from an affluent man's point of view, he didn't consider the less affluent and the WOMEN involved!!

Especially affluent. No try am, all those women don’t love you, it’s just your money. The time you are old, when the money is gone. So are they. They will disappear like the wind. None of them will be there in old age. Your children will not have any loyalty towards you, especially for what they saw their mother endure in that marriage.

Pa Ned does not have a wife at home. He married 6, only one remain and even that one tried to run away but she does not have her own money. She’s not a wife, she’s a prisoner. Is this what you will wish for yourself at 80?

adekolaelect:
Babily write up. I may only be right based on your own personal perspectives but in real life I don't agree with you BCS Your" succefull" doesn't have specific definations . Which will only be measured in only individual lives perspectives . Your 6 is 9 somewhere else. Only a Coward runs away from obstacles , A brave do the right things irespective of difficulties once you know it will give you value ,respect and Fruits in the future.

Not an issue of being cowardly. More about strategically avoiding what you know will be obstacles and problems you don't need.

For me, polygamy is not an option. Did not grow up in one and don't know many who did.

Additionally, as a logical person, I see so many obvious disadvantages of polygamy that I do not want to learn of the hard way i.e by engaging in it to then have serious regrets and failures.

DiarisGodoo:
It is rare to come accross an adult from a polygamous family who'd tell you polygamy was great. (Not impossible but rare). Equally rare to see one from monogamy who wishes dad was polygamous.
Guy below summarizes it well.

Precisely. A fellow Nigerian course mate of mine at Uni in the UK hated his dad passionately because of what he claimed was neglect of himself and his mother when he was growing up.

Second year, when we moved out of dorms, we rented a house near uni with another coursemate. That was when I saw how close to his mom this dude was and how much he looked after her because he credited his progress and success to her alone.

He resented his dad. No love there at all and was not cool with his other siblings from other wives of his dad. He moved to the US after we graduated and is well-adjusted today after marrying same lady he had been dating at Uni .He has four kids and they are all USA citizens.

CoronaVirusPro:
Bitter and honest truth!

Men with one wife are the saddest, demoralized, lonely and isolated creatures on Earth.

If marriage vows were to be renewable, 99% of men won’t renew it. They will run for their dear life’s.

With this number of likes and shares you got for this your comment,shows clearly many people especially men are passing through hell in their marriage and what could have responsible for this.

First, marriage built on faulty foundation of infatuation called love will not and can't last long.

Secondly,any man going into marriage because of outside beauty alone without inside beauty will later be disappointed and pissed off when she started showing her true colour.

Above all Christ is the sure foundation of most successful marriage, allow Christ into your life and family,He is the prince of peace and you will experience peace, love and joy in your family which no religion can give you.

jchioma:
King Solomon Nwoko speaking. I wonder why you didn’t marry up to 100, so we know that you are standing on a very balanced ground.

While men are polygamous by nature, several factors have kept many from engaging in polygamy among which is peace of mind.

Marrying 100 women will not be a bad idea, just imagine having 100 different to/tow to suck

That's a personal opinion.
It is not instruction of God to do so.
Several men does so out of defence, selfishness and pride.

I think it's the other way round.. I pity for men with multiple wives. Because for me if nor be because of pikin I no go marry.

Well, that's true sha.
One man, one wife is an unmitigated scam against men.

Every man get where dey pinch am for shoe. Since his is variety of kpekuses under his roof, he should carry on. God knows many wealthy married men who flaunt their wives at every occasion still patronize side chicks in hotels. My major problem is why these men claim to be Christians when polygamy is embedded in our indigenous traditions.

Hismajesty44:
Your opinion of him being a Senator of Nigeria and reason why the country's in ruin just trashy! Many countries in the world practice polygamy and they are doing well, and Nigeria constitution never forbid polygamous marriage.

If you were not too emotionally caught up in overly defending Polygamy (which I didn't even criticize or disagree with), you would have seen clearly that my critique about his career as a leader wasn't about his opinion on Polygamy...!

It was clearly about his choice of words and misogynistic attitude towards the opposite gender.

A Senator uttering or using such terms to allude to women in any civilised nation would he opening himself to impeachable recall.

Demanding a certain level of decorum, intelligence and civility in utterances regarding any topic, not just Polygamy, is not "trashy" sir.


Demand more from your elected and overpaid leaders... You deserve far better than this level of mind-numbing and shocking mediocrity.

dalongjnr:
He's saying the right ✅️ thing.
Forget about morality. Marriage is firstly cultural before spiritual and then scriptural.

So culture comes before spiritual to you,when the spiritual controls the physical...

CoronaVirusPro:
Bitter and honest truth!

Men with one wife are the saddest, demoralized, lonely and isolated creatures on Earth.

If marriage vows were to be renewable, 99% of men won’t renew it. They will run for their dear life’s.

young man speak for yourself.

There are many happy men with their one wife..

If e no work for you no come dey generalize....

Light777:
young man speak for yourself.

There are many happy men with their one wife..

If e no work for you no come dey generalize....

Hello!

No man with one wife is happy. They only fake it for peace sake.

Offer him a second wife directly from you and see how he will become happier.

Those smiles are not from his soul and definitely putting it on because of kids.

CoronaVirusPro:
Hello!

No man with one wife is happy. They only fake it for peace sake.

Offer him a second wife directly from you and see how he will become happier.

Those smiles are not from his soul and definitely putting it on because of kids.

Is Ned happy? What Ned is going through with his wives constantly running away is what you call happiness?

All his wives have left him?

2mch:
Na so. Na why all the wives you pack like cow for house don all run away. You come de marry your grand daughter age carry her go shrine say she must not leave you. She too don run like this. E remain the one wey don run before and you fit threaten. That one go still run as Regina don run. You wey do polygamy get 20 children no wife. Lmao. Baba, it seems like you are worse off o. You have a life that people all over social media are laughing about.

You really made sense with the bolded comment.

But in monogamous marriage, your wife is also after all your inheritance too.

Ifexibe:
“Women would rather share a high value Man than be saddled with a faithful loser.” - RM

"Hypergamy doesn’t care for male idealistic expectations of love." - Rational Male

Her goal was probably to get pregnant first since she was pressured by family to marry an older man so she can at least lay claim to inheritance, then later pursue her hypergamous instincts like most of these dumb bitches do.

All in love is fair - Steve wonder.

Love800:
All his wives have left him?

Only one is left. She also ran away but had to run back due to threats of loss of her kids and lack of money. She’s the only one left.