₦airaland Forum

obembet:
Uncle is smart... I knew the guy will run away after seeing the List . So he's requesting for nonrefundable fee .


Run away from your uncle.. he doesn't mean well to u

No refund after payment 😅😂🤣

He should not try it!Go and meet another Uncle or a man from your fathers kindred whom you believe can talk to him and explain what’s going on to him!

JoyLong123423:
My dad is late and my fiance proposed early this year. We did Introduction a few months ago and my very difficult uncle who is the last of his siblings was asked to handle the sending of Marriage List. He is now asking my fiance to pay over 100k for him to transport himself to the village to collect the list. He says it is tradition.

I have reached out to another uncle to try to reason with him but no one is doing anything about it.


I'm Ukwani from Ndokwa west and I don't believe this is how it is done. I have gone back to read about my culture and asked other people and someone said that the list can be gotten from any cyber cafe in the town. Please is this true?

I need advice as I do not want my uncle to take advantage of my fiance. All this is just to see the Marriage List before he now starts to pay for what is on the list.

I'm scared that he will inflate what is on the list too and no one will do anything about it.

Just use style snap the list give your man for WhatsApp

If you have a brother, tell him to go to your village and meet the oldest person in your extended family(okpara). He’s the one that will tell him the requirement for taking the list. In my village it’s just 3000 naira hot drink. Don’t let your fiancé go to your village yet bcs I’m suspecting that your uncle. Your brother or if u don’t have a brother tell a close cousin. Ignore that your uncle but make sure you respects him ooo. If you have a brother after all these tell him to start attending your family meeting we call it umunna family meeting at my side.

JoyLong123423:
My dad is late and my fiance proposed early this year. We did Introduction a few months ago and my very difficult uncle who is the last of his siblings was asked to handle the sending of Marriage List. He is now asking my fiance to pay over 100k for him to transport himself to the village to collect the list. He says it is tradition.

I have reached out to another uncle to try to reason with him but no one is doing anything about it.


I'm Ukwani from Ndokwa west and I don't believe this is how it is done. I have gone back to read about my culture and asked other people and someone said that the list can be gotten from any cyber cafe in the town. Please is this true?

I need advice as I do not want my uncle to take advantage of my fiance. All this is just to see the Marriage List before he now starts to pay for what is on the list.

I'm scared that he will inflate what is on the list too and no one will do anything about it.

If I wan marry you daughter and you give me marriage list.

I will just walk out
Am doing you a favor already
Why d list

I just read this post and I saw you attending Shiloh in 2040 without a hubby.



But God’s mercies are over you and your Joys of becoming a happy wife and fruitful mother must be complete without sorrows.



I hereby decree by the power of the Son of God that henceforth anything your Uncle does or say will be rendered irrelevant, and he will never be granted the powers to decide your life and future ever again.


You bear the mark of Christ.


Your Uncle will get to know that one of his many sins will catch up with him if he doesn’t comply.


My peace I leave you

Na you carry ur personal decision go meet useless people ‘—-
Marriage to me was personal and I did it without my father sef and his useless brothers.

JoyLong123423:
My dad is late and my fiance proposed early this year. We did Introduction a few months ago and my very difficult uncle who is the last of his siblings was asked to handle the sending of Marriage List. He is now asking my fiance to pay over 100k for him to transport himself to the village to collect the list. He says it is tradition.

I have reached out to another uncle to try to reason with him but no one is doing anything about it.


I'm Ukwani from Ndokwa west and I don't believe this is how it is done. I have gone back to read about my culture and asked other people and someone said that the list can be gotten from any cyber cafe in the town. Please is this true?

I need advice as I do not want my uncle to take advantage of my fiance. All this is just to see the Marriage List before he now starts to pay for what is on the list.

I'm scared that he will inflate what is on the list too and no one will do anything about it.

I pity young boys planning to marry o! Families wallowing in poverty dey wait u cos I know na from poor families most men dey go pick girls cos they want to be the bread winner only.. while the rich only marry their fellow rich people.. lol poverty no fit finish for poor man family until e die

Arostar2023:
Say na free wife de hungry you...if marriage list or whatever scares you away from marriage, then you are not ready yet.

Thief!

SpencerForbes:
Your uncle does not like you and he’s probably diabolical and has evil intentions.

Hope the man has left so he doesn’t get affected with your family problems🤧
Let your uncle marry you😤

If you’ve got village council which I doubt you know, summon your uncle to their presence let him explain his motive.

List that I was with my dad when he was writing it and even making calls to confirm.
Go and settle with your uncle before you get married so you and your uncles don’t stress the innocent man🤧😤
🚶‍♂️

wen you leave basics de go do introduction (party)
how eye no go enter their Body
the uncle
normally them de drop something for the list
be like them do big party for the introduction and them no invite who de in charge of the list
eye de pepper them

I don't think any sensible man should go for a paid wife. If whatever financial requirements for marrying a woman goes out of what a man can happily do and even enjoy, he must look else where!

Arostar2023:
Say na free wife de hungry you...if marriage list or whatever scares you away from marriage, then you are not ready yet.

Arostar2023:
Say na free wife de hungry you...if marriage list or whatever scares you away from marriage, then you are not ready yet.

Marriage list or extortion? 100k to go to village to get list, another 100k to return back to base from village. If dude is broke and need money he should rather ask than hiding behind some fake list abeg.

Thundafireseun:
Without reading the article, I knew you are from Delta state….

No reason am too much… A lot of Uncles are devilish… This happens all the time when the father of the bride is no longer alive

Lai Lai, this is not our culture. I even though she was from the SE before I got to that part. I've never heard of any Deltan doing this unless they crossed the Niger to borrow that aspect.

JoyLong123423, what your uncle is doing is extortion and it's not any Deltan culture. Report him to other uncles and say that your fiance and his family will start calling your family "pathetic, hungry people" and you don't want any disgrace to come to the family, so they should call their brother to order.

I hope this kind of act from your family will not chase your man away.

You see why women are staying single?
I just pity them.
Married in Africa is something else
Worst part, when she comes, she won't still give you peace of mind.

JoyLong123423:
My dad is late and my fiance proposed early this year. We did Introduction a few months ago and my very difficult uncle who is the last of his siblings was asked to handle the sending of Marriage List. He is now asking my fiance to pay over 100k for him to transport himself to the village to collect the list. He says it is tradition.

I have reached out to another uncle to try to reason with him but no one is doing anything about it.


I'm Ukwani from Ndokwa west and I don't believe this is how it is done. I have gone back to read about my culture and asked other people and someone said that the list can be gotten from any cyber cafe in the town. Please is this true?

I need advice as I do not want my uncle to take advantage of my fiance. All this is just to see the Marriage List before he now starts to pay for what is on the list.

I'm scared that he will inflate what is on the list too and no one will do anything about it.

Them never born that uncle. If I change am for am once, body go tell am.

McLizbae:
I don't think any sensible man should go for a paid wife. If whatever financial requirements for marrying a woman goes out of what a man can happily do and even enjoy, he must look else where!

Its not even about the money being out of pocket but if in-law needs money, he should just go ahead and ask me than hiding behind some fake stuffs to get money from me. That will come off as someone looking to defraud and extort me instead. Ask me for money if you need, don’t hide behind some stupid lies abeg.

Osebanjo:
Marriage list or extortion? 100k to go to village to get list, another 100k to return back to base from village. If dude is broke and need money he should rather ask than hiding behind some fake list abeg.

There are people that married in that village of hers without paying a dime for any marriage list or whatever. These things are handled with wisdom... there's always a way out of situation like this for the determine. That's my point.

McLizbae:
I don't think any sensible man should go for a paid wife. If whatever financial requirements for marrying a woman goes out of what a man can happily do and even enjoy, he must look else where!

Like I replied someone else up there, there are people that married in that village of hers without paying a dime for any marriage list or whatever. These things are handled with wisdom... there's always a way out of situation like this for the determined. You don't chicken out of a serious business like marriage because of dowry or whatever. That's my point.

Bros there is something you’ll bring before you’re giving the list by an appointed extended family member. It’s cheap not 100,000. But she can give him a little tfare to go to the village for the list bcs maybe d 100k uncle doesn’t have d money to travel to the villa. It’s not a bad thing.

Rich4god:
Na wa o...

Look for an elderly man in the village and report to him. In most villages, seeing list is free except the intending husband decided to drop something. When I got my own list, it was my wife brother who photocopied and gave me. You can get the list from anyone. You can look for any lady that recently got married in your village and ask her to collect the list from her husband.

But I will advice that what ever you do, ensure that your uncle knows that what he's doing is wrong, else if you get the list without him, during negotiation he might be insisting on paying high amount on certain items on that list just to get back to you and your fiance.

What would happen to the coveted list if you get pregnant for your fiance? I am asking because marriage is marriage.
It is baffling that in 2025, whereas people are struggling to have ends met some "uncle" would constitute themselves into "obstacles". That list is only important that you are still without pregnancy. Just tell him that if you do not get the list, you will just get pregnant for your fiance.

Arostar2023:
There are people that married in that village of hers without paying a dime for any marriage list or whatever. These things are handled with wisdom... there's always a way out of situation like this for the determine. That's my point.

Well I see no difference in what we are saying. If anyone is looking to get money from me, come out clean and tell me don’t go hiding behind lies and stuffs like this. Aje I nor go mind and I go walk away.

You’re still a kid so sit this one out boy!!!!

tgmservice:
If I wan marry you daughter and you give me marriage list.

I will just walk out
Am doing you a favor already
Why d list

Ok

cjfavour:
Bros there is something you’ll bring before you’re giving the list by an appointed extended family member. It’s cheap not 100,000. But she can give him a little tfare to go to the village for the list bcs maybe d 100k uncle doesn’t have d money to travel to the villa. It’s not a bad thing.

They marrying off their daughter is their duty. If they need my help to travel to the village to carve out the list and all that I will gladly help. If they are not willing to marry their daughter off then they can gladly keep her if they think they will be masking their poverty under one traveling fee then good luck to them and the daughter.

Arostar2023:
Say na free wife de hungry you...if marriage list or whatever scares you away from marriage, then you are not ready yet.

If it reach your turn, empty your account because of marriage

Your fiancé should have started befriending someone very close to the family headship stool before now. It is at such times as this that such people are useful 😎

SpencerForbes:
Your uncle does not like you and he’s probably diabolical and has evil intentions.

Hope the man has left so he doesn’t get affected with your family problems🤧
Let your uncle marry you😤

If you’ve got village council which I doubt you know, summon your uncle to their presence let him explain his motive.

List that I was with my dad when he was writing it and even making calls to confirm.
Go and settle with your uncle before you get married so you and your uncles don’t stress the innocent man🤧😤
🚶‍♂️

It's nothing diabolic. Some people are just greedy when they see someone come to marry from their family.

One would think it's a poverty mentality, but not all poor families do that. So it's just greed.

Please you don't print list from cybercafe. Negotiate with your uncle. There are procedure to everything. Follow your tradition. If you go the Eze's palace to get the list, won't you give drink to elders?. Please go back to your uncle.

The thing the OP didn't say is dat her uncle lives in Lagos....

Again as deltans do, almost if not all of a kindred relocate to Lagos ND stay and die there....

Now the uncle needs to visit the village and consult with elders ND get list ND return to Lagos to give ur fiance..

Transport is 35k so to ND fro will b 70k

Plus many in hand...

So u see the uncle is not a trying to frustrate her as sh might b suggesting...


U see igbos build house in the villa and retire there when they are old..?