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Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM - Travel (3) - Nairaland

Nairaland ForumNairaland GeneralTravelNot Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM (9338 Views)

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Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by InvertedHammer: 1:05pm On Nov 21, 2025
Nairaland111:
*File photo added by admin
/
Don't blame the beggar. Blame the giver.

All the potential giver has to say is NO--a simple two letter word that many are scared of saying. Heavens won't fall. Or better, don't pick your calls. Don't reply any Whatsapp messages or voice notes. All mallam with im own kettle. cool

/
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by dauntless15(m): 1:14pm On Nov 21, 2025
sylve11:
Your own too far sef.


After traveling from Warri to Abuja, I was inundated the next day with over 39 messages requesting assistance.

I kindly responded to them that 'na Abuja I dey o'

E be like them think sey Aero dey go abroad.

I nor blame them sha, my nephew snap me go upload. sad cool
You sure say na your nephew snap you, I know people like you who can't resist the urge to show off no matter how irrelevant that thing is, people must see you doing it.
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Goldbw122(m): 2:04pm On Nov 21, 2025
Nairaland111:
*File photo added by admin
It’s crazy how people assume traveling automatically turns someone into an ATM. I really feel you on this. Helping when you can is normal, but the constant entitlement gets exhausting. You’re still trying to build your own life in a new place, facing your own challenges, yet people back home act like you’re swimming in money. Setting boundaries isn’t wickedness, it’s survival. At the end of the day, everyone has to stand on their own two feet.


That is why I’m focused on standing on my own in real life, not depending on anyone. Having your own money and handling your own responsibilities feels good and gives you confidence. But when you don’t have that, it can make you feel scared and unsure of yourself.
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Eniolohunda: 6:20pm On Nov 21, 2025
Nairaland111:
Thank you so much for your contribution. I came online out of frustration. If I tell you the amount I’ve spent on giveaways, you won’t believe it. People complain that Nigeria is very hard, yet they’re able to train their children who are now growing into adults, while I’m still trying to put my own life together.

I won’t mention the specific country, but you can already guess from the scholarship name. I think you should focus on the DAAD scholarship — it’s straightforward. If you need help, don’t hesitate to ask.

Also, don’t limit yourself to just that. Apply for other scholarships and join free travel WhatsApp groups to learn. Between 2021 and 2023, I was practically living on Nairaland, reading everything related to japa — from page 1 of the travel section up to page 3000.
I love your spirit and it is the spirit of growth. And this is something I usually tell anyone who cares to listen, once you put your mind in it, you can do it. Have the mentality of emancipating yourself out of suffering. Your story reminded me how i started my owm journey, just like you, in 2018, I was all over Google, nairaland, even Facebook searching for how I can travel out of the country for a better life as a professional. And internet is wired in such a way that whatever you search once will be pushed to you more. From there I started seeing the groups of like mind which I followed to WhatsApp, I also thank God for a supportive spouse with like mind.
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Nairaland111(op): 7:28pm On Nov 21, 2025
Eniolohunda:
I love your spirit and it is the spirit of growth. And this is something I usually tell anyone who cares to listen, once you put your mind in it, you can do it. Have the mentality of emancipating yourself out of suffering. Your story reminded me how i started my owm journey, just like you, in 2018, I was all over Google, nairaland, even Facebook searching for how I can travel out of the country for a better life as a professional. And internet is wired in such a way that whatever you search once will be pushed to you more. From there I started seeing the groups of like mind which I followed to WhatsApp, I also thank God for a supportive spouse with like mind.
Thank you so much for sharing your own experience. Your words of wisdom really touched me, and there is so much others can learn from your story also. Can I pm u?
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by femi4: 7:37pm On Nov 21, 2025
pretydiva:
Most people have this entitlement mentality, and it’s irritating to say the least.
Stop encouraging them. Learn to say NO
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Oyindidi(f): 7:44pm On Nov 21, 2025
Even here in Nigeria the billing is crazy
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by EDGEof2MORO: 8:16pm On Nov 21, 2025
Gbadugbakun:
Well said. Black tax is putting so many Africans in poverty.
which one is black tax again? If you do not want to help your family, don't help them. No dey call am another name e go come be like na so be for evribodi.

I am sure when you (and others like you) stop helping your family, you will acquire more wealth and escape this poverty you speak of.
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by wiseoneking: 9:36pm On Nov 21, 2025
Yorubastardz:
Abroad guys feeling funky

If no be this demonic APC Who send una??

We know many of you there don't have shishi
That's why you run when they ask for help

Werey go dey America for 6 years
Dey sleep inside him car grin grin
Dey collect food stamps to survive

Ask am to send ordinary $25
Werey go begin dey run around the bush grin

We know say shishi una no get grin grin

Na to dey snap picture say you dey America just for bragging rights.
To come back Christmas be like war
Flight ticket money you no get grin grin
You said it all that they don't have SHISHI but why mock them since you know you are better off than them. You are already aware that they sleep in their cars because they can't afford to rent the cheapest accommodations, and they are even collecting food stamps according to your findings. That means they cannot afford three square meals like their Nigerian counterparts, yet you expected them to send their only $25 to people.
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Eniolohunda: 9:45pm On Nov 21, 2025
Nairaland111:
Thank you so much for sharing your own experience. Your words of wisdom really touched me, and there is so much others can learn from your story also. Can I pm u?
Yes
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by pansophist(m): 9:45am On Nov 22, 2025
intruder15:
Firstly, I don't get why someone will bill you within 2 years of you relocating abroad. Cuz whether scholarship or not, you need time to settle down.
.....

You think common sense is common grin

My cousin who just turned 18 has been billed since the first week he landed Europe. The billing didn't stopped until he changed his whatsapp number. This is a boy that is not working, not yet studying (waiting for next admission intake), and under my care.

The younger brother who is 14 has not been billed yet, but that one get luck. He is too young to have billers before he left Nigeria.

Many times, billers use a strategy called ''try your luck''. They will just throw a format to you, and its up to you to reject it. Its like how a market woman will give you a random price, and it is up to you to reject it, and haggle it down to your price range.
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Spainever(m): 10:34am On Nov 22, 2025
Well said , however you need to apply wisdom and politeness when turning down some requests. For instance the lecturer that says you will take him to abroad ,his request is valid and not bad . You can tell him when you settle down you will assist him with information that will make his relocation possible. There is no need telling him you have siblings bla bla bla .I have not live in Nigeria since 2013 ,I know the kind of request I received everyday . Some are genuine requests while others are just " funky" requests. You have to help people based on priorities and relationship with them. I discovered that my close friends and family don't make unnecessary requests but I do assist in a little way especially anything that has to do with school fees and health matter. Unfortunately it is those who have not spoken to for decade that will ask 100k to balance iphone money .
Above all ,I will encourage you continue to assist in your little way don't displease yourself to please people. Be polite when turning down requests. People in Nigeria don't understand, some assumed working in harsh conditions are easy . There are people in Nigeria who are better off than us abroad ,they have stable business and personal houses yet they will ask for urgent " 20k " if you don't give they become angry .
Be wise ! Be polite ! Take care of yourself
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Spainever(m): 10:36am On Nov 22, 2025
pansophist:
.....

You think common sense is common grin

My cousin who just turned 18 has been billed since the first week he landed Europe. The billing didn't stopped until he changed his whatsapp number. This is a boy that is not working, not yet studying (waiting for next admission intake), and under my care.

The younger brother who is 14 has not been billed yet, but that one get luck. He is too young to have billers before he left Nigeria.

Many times, billers use a strategy called ''try your luck''. They will just throw a format to you, and its up to you to reject it. Its like how a market woman will give you a random price, and it is up to you to reject it, and haggle it down to your price range.
Hahaha 🤣 those ones are wicked billing 18 years old girl
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Spainever(m): 10:39am On Nov 22, 2025
People will tell you Nigeria is hard Nigeria is hard,but same person built two houses ..You abroad managing one small studio. The same person with two houses sent his children to Covenant university will ask you for urgent loan " 200k " Oya pay back the loan he refuses
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Spainever(m): 10:43am On Nov 22, 2025
You must learn when to say No in a polite way
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by intruder15(m): 11:18am On Nov 22, 2025
pansophist:
.....

You think common sense is common grin

My cousin who just turned 18 has been billed since the first week he landed Europe. The billing didn't stopped until he changed his whatsapp number. This is a boy that is not working, not yet studying (waiting for next admission intake), and under my care.

The younger brother who is 14 has not been billed yet, but that one get luck. He is too young to have billers before he left Nigeria.

Many times, billers use a strategy called ''try your luck''. They will just throw a format to you, and its up to you to reject it. Its like how a market woman will give you a random price, and it is up to you to reject it, and haggle it down to your price range.
Na wa o. No be small thing o.
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by hammed71(m): 12:32pm On Nov 22, 2025
pansophist:
.....

You think common sense is common grin

My cousin who just turned 18 has been billed since the first week he landed Europe. The billing didn't stopped until he changed his whatsapp number. This is a boy that is not working, not yet studying (waiting for next admission intake), and under my care.

The younger brother who is 14 has not been billed yet, but that one get luck. He is too young to have billers before he left Nigeria.

Many times, billers use a strategy called ''try your luck''. They will just throw a format to you, and its up to you to reject it. Its like how a market woman will give you a random price, and it is up to you to reject it, and haggle it down to your price range.
bro did your cousins enter through family reunification
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by abbyyzino(m): 12:50pm On Nov 22, 2025
Nairaland111:
*File photo added by admin
You better stop doing other jobs besides the one paying your stipend from RA/TA before you put your student visa in jeopardy. Don’t because you want to send money to people back home create an issue that will send you back to Nigeria for yourself. Dont say I don’t warn you ooo
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Eniolohunda: 4:29pm On Nov 22, 2025
Nairaland111:
Thank you so much for sharing your own experience. Your words of wisdom really touched me, and there is so much others can learn from your story also. Can I pm u?
Hi, the last time I opened nairaland I saw a notification of message from a nairalander, which I thought might be you. Unfortunately, I went to check my email and I can't find the message, both inbox, spam or promo. In fact, I had to wipe the spam completely off the junks. If you could resend the message, I will continue checking my email to respond as necessary.
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by pansophist(m): 10:56pm On Nov 22, 2025
hammed71:
bro did your cousins enter through family reunification
Yes.
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Hypnotise: 7:30am On Nov 23, 2025
Na to give excuses sure pass.
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by CountinBlessins(m): 7:32am On Nov 23, 2025
Kingzjayzee:
BTW, I love the fact that long quote has been reduced such that one can now choose to expand the quoted comment or article instead of scrolling endlessly before one gets to see the actual comment. Very annoying. Such a nice development and goes to show that the nairaland crews are really taking note. Nairaland for life. Example in the image below 👇 emphasis on the circled area
Are you employed ? Like do you have a job?
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Kingzjayzee: 8:35am On Nov 23, 2025
CountinBlessins:
Are you employed ? Like do you have a job?
may I know why you asked?
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by gforce5: 1:01pm On Nov 25, 2025
They don't have money but yet the money they send to Nigeria is the country's second largest source of income after oil exports. Nigerians in the Diaspora are the single largest investors in the country. They are the ones that support families, sponsor relatives to school, buy land, set up start ups and keep the economy going. If not for Nigerian abroad, the country would have collapsed. Majority of the people that come to Nigeria for dirty december are Nigerians in the diaspora. You lots in Nigeria, what is your economic/financial contribution to the country if not mouth?? Very ungrateful lots.

Yorubastardz:
Abroad guys feeling funky

If no be this demonic APC Who send una??

We know many of you there don't have shishi
That's why you run when they ask for help

Werey go dey America for 6 years
Dey sleep inside him car grin grin
Dey collect food stamps to survive

Ask am to send ordinary $25
Werey go begin dey run around the bush grin

We know say shishi una no get grin grin

Na to dey snap picture say you dey America just for bragging rights.
To come back Christmas be like war
Flight ticket money you no get grin grin
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by NassBoy(m): 11:38am On Nov 29, 2025
wiseoneking:
You said it all that they don't have SHISHI but why mock them since you know you are better off than them. You are already aware that they sleep in their cars because they can't afford to rent the cheapest accommodations, and they are even collecting food stamps according to your findings. That means they cannot afford three square meals like their Nigerian counterparts, yet you expected them to send their only $25 to people.
Good response Sir 🙏.
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by Zealoy(m): 3:34pm On Dec 08, 2025
Its 4yrs plus my kid bro went to the UK and he haven't sent a dime to me, after asking him for help he promised me and later disappointed. i just lock up i don't like insults from anyone that's y i find it hard reaching out for help, i have friends in Canada and America but i haven't ask them to help me for once
Re: Not Every Abroad Person Is Your ATM by 12inchess:
Anytime I see a message on Facebook from a long lost acquaintance on Facebook or Instagram. I no say na for billing. Out of courtesy I reply such messages but as things are going I will stop replying to such messages because they always end up in someone trying to bill me. One story or the other that involves you helping out with funds. We that we are abroad hustling, it's not like it's easy especially under harsh weather with no family close by.
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