₦airaland Forum

I saw this post on facebook and I begin to ask myself what could be the reason why a man should not agree to spend even a night in his in-laws house.
So is it a bad thing for a man to spend the night in his in-laws house?

Stop believing every bit of trash you read on social media. My dad married from a different tribe, and we spent plenty of time at our maternal grandfather’s place growing up. We’d stay there for a week before heading to our own village, and there was never any issue. My dad never regretted it, and the respect was mutual. If you don't want to visit your in-laws, that’s on you, but if you marry into a good family, they’ll treat you like their own son.

SpencerForbes:
Stop believing every bit of trash you read on social media. My dad married from a different tribe, and we spent plenty of time at our maternal grandfather’s place growing up. We’d stay there for a week before heading to our own village, and there was never any issue. My dad never regretted it, and the respect was mutual. If you don't want to visit your in-laws, that’s on you, but if you marry into a good family, they’ll treat you like their own son.

is it only you the grand children that sleep in your grandparents' house {which is normal} or including your dad? The beginning of "see finish' is when your dad keeps sleeping in his inlaw's house, very soon, he will start washing plates or sweeping round the house for them. Keep supporting rubbish. I support op, as much as possible, men should avoid sleeping in inlaws' place, they shouldn't put themselves in situations where they will have no other alternative.

oz4real83:
is it only you the grand children that sleep in your grandparents' house {which is normal} or including your dad? The beginning of "see finish' is when your keeps sleeping in his inlaw's house, very soon, he will start washing plates or sweeping round the house for them. Keep supporting rubbish. I support op, as much as possible, men should avoid sleeping in inlaws' place, they shouldn't put themselves in situations where they will have no other alternative.

I don't buy the idea that a one-week visit will suddenly have a man washing plates in his in-laws' house—especially if he's well-to-do. Married an 'Ada' and have always supported the family whenever they needed it, plus they are doing quite well themselves. If you are a responsible man who stands by his in-laws, they’ll treat you with dignity. The only time 'see-finish' enters the matter is when a man moves his whole household into his wife’s father’s house because he’s hit rock bottom.

At that point, it’s better to retreat to your own village and regroup than to stay there and lose your birthright. It's about boundaries. I remember my grandpa’s house—it was big enough for everyone, and he loved having us around. My grandfather was the type who wanted everyone under one roof; he and my dad were like best friends. It was beautiful watching him and my dad exchange wisdom over games of Ludo like true father and son.

Now remember the op is talking about a night and not permanent residence. A night isn’t too bad if your in law is well to do and has a nice place but a permanent residence should be a no—no.

SpencerForbes:
I don't buy the idea that a one-week visit will suddenly have a man washing plates in his in-laws' house—especially if he's well-to-do. Married an 'Ada' and have always supported the family whenever they needed it, plus they are doing quite well themselves. If you are a responsible man who stands by his in-laws, they’ll treat you with dignity. The only time 'see-finish' enters the matter is when a man moves his whole household into his wife’s father’s house because he’s hit rock bottom.

At that point, it’s better to retreat to your own village and regroup than to stay there and lose your birthright. It's about boundaries. I remember my grandpa’s house—it was big enough for everyone, and he loved having us around. My grandfather was the type who wanted everyone under one roof; he and my dad were like best friends. It was beautiful watching him and my dad exchange wisdom over games of Ludo like true father and son.

Now remember the op is talking about a night and not permanent residence. A night isn’t too bad if your in law is well to do and has a nice place but a permanent residence should be a no—no.

You're supporting it because it ended well for your dad. Many other experiences will differ from yours, thus the reason it is advised to visit your inlaws and leave the same day, or at best, lodge in the nearest hotel if leaving that day is not an option.

But then, one should not live by the books. You just have to observe the people you're dealing with.

Well in this life it is best to always avoid see finish

oz4real83:
is it only you the grand children that sleep in your grandparents' house {which is normal} or including your dad? The beginning of "see finish' is when your keeps sleeping in his inlaw's house, very soon, he will start washing plates or sweeping round the house for them. Keep supporting rubbish. I support op, as much as possible, men should avoid sleeping in inlaws' place, they shouldn't put themselves in situations where they will have no other alternative.

Uncle your in law is your family so there is nothing wrong in washing and cleaning your in laws place. That is what it means to be family. After all when you go to your uncle's house you do so there and your uncle still disrespects you and see finish

SpencerForbes:
I don't buy the idea that a one-week visit will suddenly have a man washing plates in his in-laws' house—especially if he's well-to-do. Married an 'Ada' and have always supported the family whenever they needed it, plus they are doing quite well themselves. If you are a responsible man who stands by his in-laws, they’ll treat you with dignity. The only time 'see-finish' enters the matter is when a man moves his whole household into his wife’s father’s house because he’s hit rock bottom.

At that point, it’s better to retreat to your own village and regroup than to stay there and lose your birthright. It's about boundaries. I remember my grandpa’s house—it was big enough for everyone, and he loved having us around. My grandfather was the type who wanted everyone under one roof; he and my dad were like best friends. It was beautiful watching him and my dad exchange wisdom over games of Ludo like true father and son.

Now remember the op is talking about a night and not permanent residence. A night isn’t too bad if your in law is well to do and has a nice place but a permanent residence should be a no—no.

"Especially if he is well to do"

Imagine that scenario for a man who isn't well to do aka the average man on the street

It isn't a joke but it will be funny as hell

ExudeLoveToAll:
"Especially if he is well to do"

Imagine that scenario for a man who isn't well to do aka the average man on the street

It isn't a joke but it will be funny as hell

Lolz 😂 I’m convinced this mindset is mostly a 'lower-class' struggle. I can’t imagine Femi Otedola telling Mr Eazi to go wash plates in the kitchen just because he spent a night at the house. In that circle, they probably wouldn't even be in the same wing of the mansion. Even if Mr Eazi decided to help out, it would be entirely on his own terms—and honestly, a typical Yoruba man like Otedola would likely find the gesture unnecessary or even awkward.

Imma624:
I saw this post on facebook and I begin to ask myself what could be the reason why a man should not agree to spend even a night in his in-laws house.
So is it a bad thing for a man to spend the night in his in-laws house?

Before you comment, be sure to be a married individual. If not you won't understand what op is talking about

SpencerForbes:
Lolz 😂 I’m convinced this mindset is mostly a 'lower-class' struggle. I can’t imagine Femi Otedola telling Mr Eazi to go wash plates in the kitchen just because he spent a night at the house. In that circle, they probably wouldn't even be in the same wing of the mansion. Even if Mr Eazi decided to help out, it would be entirely on his own terms—and honestly, a typical Yoruba man like Otedola would likely find the gesture unnecessary or even awkward.

In 2022 FMF and NBS said only 5% of Nigerians have 500k and above in their account though the starts have changed now but may not be more than 10% meaning majority of Nigerians are on that category, those examples you cited are just exceptions . The struggle is real.

Imma624:
I saw this post on facebook and I begin to ask myself what could be the reason why a man should not agree to spend even a night in his in-laws house.
So is it a bad thing for a man to spend the night in his in-laws house?

There’s nothing wrong with spending the night in your in-laws place if it serves a clear purpose.

For example, if you’re traveling to the village and decide to stop by their place for the night, rest, and continue your journey the next day, that’s perfectly fine.

Where it starts to look bad is when you move in permanently with your wife. That’s when respect disappears very quickly.