₦airaland Forum

In every family there's these uncles and aunts who knows nothing about you, they don't even know your name sometimes or how you survived into adulthood but feels you owe them allegiance whenever they see you.

first off I know it's an African thing to always respect people older than you, and before you crucify me I am also an adult now with his own adult life, I keep to myself and I don't force people to respect me as respect is earned.

A family member died and we all came back for it, coupled with the holidays, the whole extended family was present including some of those in diaspora, I'm an introvert so I keep to myself, I generally greeted everyone when I came and sat in my corner.

Then there's this useless Cockatoo who drank free beer until his brains froze, first he kept talking about yahoo boys, how they dress a certain way, how they do all sorts to be rich, how they kill people to be rich, they both with soap gotten from herbalist, they don't go to work yet they're living fine, they have cars at a young age etc.

Now when you're talking and you don't call my name trust me I won't answer you. Even if it's obvious you're talking about me, and from all indication this man was talking about me, one my mom is dead, two I earn online and don't physically go to work, third I am not begging I'm doing okay, but I still didn't pay him any mind, then he indirectly started talking about how they don't respect people enough, he was so pained for some reason and condescending.

I just got up and went to a shop outside our family house, as I was buying something this weyrey came, I got what I wanted and turned to leave and that was when I felt it, waaam at my back, this guy slapped me on my back, then he asked me directly, didn't you see me? Don't you know I'm your uncle?

I lost it, and like a reflex I slapped him back hard it was a resounding slap, he staggered backwards, and my cousins held me, before I know it has spread that I just slapped uncle whatever his name is, what's painful is everyone blamed me, for being disrespectful and suddenly it didn't matter what he did, I'm somehow supposed to attone for it.

this man didn't know how I survived till adulthood, not even a penny of his went into my upbringing, I don't know why he felt I owe him respect and allegiance, even if I did, why does he have to go about it that way.

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Lexzeey:
➜I just got up and went to a shop outside our family house, as I was buying something this weyrey came, I got what I wanted and turned to leave and that was when I felt it, waaam at my back, this guy slapped me on my back, then he asked me directly, didn't you see me? Don't you know I'm your uncle?
➜ I lost it, and like a reflex I slapped him back hard it was a resounding slap, he staggered backwards, and my cousins held me, before I know it has spread that I just slapped uncle whatever his name is, what's painful is everyone blamed me, for being disrespectful and suddenly it didn't matter what he did, I'm somehow supposed to attone for it.
this man didn't know how I survived till adulthood, not even a penny of his went into my upbringing, I don't know why he felt I owe him respect and allegiance, even if I did, why does he have to go about it that way.

1.Oh! I was literally prepared to tell you that you were wrong until I read this here. He hit you? The dude literally had it coming!... You should have started with that. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

2. Na Africa you dey so, where entitlement is literally the culture. Try to avoid the wrong crowd as much as you can.

You don't slap anyone under any circumstances besides self defense, not even your uncle! There are sane and legal means of resolving all conflicts! Go and apologize to him.

What if he wasn't talking to you? What if it was intoxication?


What if he was talking to you? Did the shoe fit so badly you wanted to hit him before you did?


If it didn't matter to you, you wouldn't have raised your hand. A better option was leaving. It works for me...since I'm hot-tempered.

Now you are trying to recruit others to justify your actions because your conscience has become your first judge and no one in reality is really supporting you..and your reputation??.. finally vindicating whatever the uncle said.

chatinent:
What if he wasn't talking to you? What if it was intoxication?


What if he was talking to you? Did the shoe fits so badly you wanted to hit him before you did?


If it didn't matter to you, you wouldn't have raised your hand. A better option was leaving. It works for me...since I'm hot-tempered.

So I should have fled like a wimp after he hit me first, wow, too bad I'm hot tempered and no one would trample upon me, maybe he should look for you and practice the whole uncle thing on you next time.

Lexzeey:
So I should have fled like a wimp after he hit me first, wow, too bad I'm hot tempered and no one would trample upon me, maybe he should look for you and practice the whole uncle thing on you next time.

There were still better ways to resolve the problems..

chatinent:
➜There were still better ways to solve the problems..

The Uncle should have learned that assault is never a good idea. That is the law, even in Nigeria.

Bruv, you’re wrong af! All these stories you’re telling won’t justify your actions. You’re bitter, have a chip on your shoulder, and some unresolved pain within you.

Lexzeey:
So I should have fled like a wimp after he hit me first, wow, too bad I'm hot tempered and no one would trample upon me, maybe he should look for you and practice the whole uncle thing on you next time.

Is he your maternal or paternal uncle?
Does he have sons?
Did you slap somebody’s father 🤣

Op, you were wrong by all measure, your conscience is pricking you that is why you felt the need to bring it to a faceless forum.

That was not even a self-defense per se, you retaliated based on thoes initial comments made by your "supposedly" uncle which you claimed were not referring to you.

Of a truth, one thing i like our mind is that it feels, perceives, thinks, wills, and especially reasons.

There must be something your mind must have been saying that somehow or one way or the other aligns with what your "supposedly" uncle was saying hence the "slap" retaliation; I might be wrong though but the mind is there to testify.

You could have walked away and hold your peace but you listened to your mind in a hurry.

Just apologize since you seek advice.

You could have done better tho

Such things have a way of coming back


You really didn't have to slap him, what if his kids are heftier or richer than u, apart from that self

That's your uncle man, its okay that u guys have history so u guys single each other out anytime


He is your uncle

Kobojunkie:
The Uncle should have learned that assault is never a good idea. That is the law, even in Nigeria.

Thsts his uncle

He is probably from a different time

Some things are excusable in a normal african setting because of age or status differences

Slapping your uncle even in retaliation doesn't sound right

Would u slap ur dad back? Even tho he assaulted u?

illicit:
➜Thsts his uncle He is probably from a different time
➜ Some things are excusable in a normal african setting bcis of age or status differences
➜ Slapping your uncle even in retaliation doesn't sound right
➜ Would u slap ur dad back? Even tho he assaulted u?

1. Your uncle, regardless of what time he claims to be from, has never had any right to hit you. The law in Nigeria has been around long enough for every adult to realize what it says and take time to adjust to it. 🥱🥱

2. Arseholery is inexcusable, no matter where on this planet you claim to be from or in. 🥱🥱

3. The law allows you to fight back when assaulted. The law is on OP's side in this, while the law is against the Uncle's actions. 🥱🥱🥱

4. I don't care who you care. If you don't respect my rights as a human, there is no reciprocity from me. 🥱🥱

[/b]Seems like[b] you've been nursing a dislike or contempt towards him and he also towards you for a while.

This usually happens when there is little communication for understanding each other.

The way forward is to forgive yourself, it's likely he has realized his mistake and forgiven you also.

Move on, and explain yourself fully to those who TRULY care about you

Ire o!

When you’re in Rome, you act like the Romans. An American kid might tell his mom to shut up, but that logic doesn't fly here in Africa. This was a test of your character, and you failed woefully. Don’t be surprised if this comes back to haunt you; some people are just waiting for a reason to go diabolical, and if your uncle is that type, you’ve just handed him the perfect excuse.

In our culture, your uncle is essentially your father. There were a hundred better ways to handle the situation than resort to a slap. If I were in your shoes, a stern, serious warning would have sent the message clearly. Now, you’ve lost the respect of the entire family and the village. Trust me, news like this spreads like wildfire, and it will take more than just time to fix your reputation. As adults, some confrontations are just better avoided.

Kobojunkie:
1. Your uncle, regardless of what time he claims to be from, has never had any right to hit you. The law in Nigeria has been around long enough for every adult to realize what it says and take time to adjust to it. 🥱🥱

2. Arseholery is inexcusable, no matter where on this planet you claim to be from or in. 🥱🥱

3. The law allows you to fight back when assaulted. The law is on OP's side in this, while the law is against the Uncle's actions. 🥱🥱🥱

4. I don't care who you care. If you don't respect my rights as a human, there is no reciprocity from me. 🥱🥱

Na lie, u no fit beat ur papa back...

Dont try that here no matter what u smoke

We go join hands beat u like fufu ni and if u dare go to station

The DPO will beat u join

LordIsaac:
You don't slap anyone under any circumstances besides self defense, not even your uncle! There are sane and legal means of resolving all conflicts! Go and apologize to him.

You people and your "under any circumstance" when in fact there are always circumstances that firing back a slap is the only right course

I think you are a very bad person but you just hide it by staying away from people, hence why you are an introvert.

You feel because you have gone through sh.... , then you have a right to behave as you like.

So, your bad nature showed because in spite of your withdrawal, your uncle still came into your personal zone. And so like a cobra in its hole, you just had to spring and bite.

Anyway, just know that another child is going to do it to you

Go and mark it today, your nephew or your niece will slap you too back.

tunjijones:
Go and mark it today, your nephew or your niece will slap you too back.

Stop making up lies! Your rich men in the village assault una old men and women regularly. Even their children repeat the same crimes against your uncles, including their grandchildren. Una no dey do anything because you have a separate set of laws in your minds for them...laws that pretty much exempt them from being held directly accountable for any crime they commit against you all. 🥱🥱🥱

All of your traditional mumbo jumbo is usually fashioned against those whom you believe are on the same level(and lower) as you, and never those who are of a higher status. Ever wondered why? Traditional ideas are weapons fashioned against the poor and gullible, and never the rich and educated in status. 🥱🥱

Going forward,avoid that ur uncle by all means. U committed a big blunder and such uncles might end up doing u a very strong thing.

U committed an abomination...u didn't slap ur cousin but an uncle. Oga,there is no justifications for this.

SpencerForbes:
When you’re in Rome, you act like the Romans. An American kid might tell his mom to shut up, but that logic doesn't fly here in Africa. This was a test of your character, and you failed woefully. Don’t be surprised if this comes back to haunt you; some people are just waiting for a reason to go diabolical, and if your uncle is that type, you’ve just handed him the perfect excuse.

In our culture, your uncle is essentially your father. There were a hundred better ways to handle the situation than resort to a slap. If I were in your shoes, a stern, serious warning would have sent the message clearly. Now, you’ve lost the respect of the entire family and the village. Trust me, news like this spreads like wildfire, and it will take more than just time to fix your reputation. As adults, some confrontations are just better avoided.

Guy, I lost inheritance Worth 2B naira. It was late when my eyes cleared, I blasted my late uncle. Omorr, if na now, he will be at the orthopedics.
Mine was using Jesus stories, leave matters oOoOO

Lexzeey:
In every family there's these uncles and aunts who knows nothing about you, they don't even know your name sometimes or how you survived into adulthood but feels you owe them allegiance whenever they see you.

first off I know it's an African thing to always respect people older than you, and before you crucify me I am also an adult now with his own adult life, I keep to myself and I don't force people to respect me as respect is earned.

A family member died and we all came back for it, coupled with the holidays, the whole extended family was present including some of those in diaspora, I'm an introvert so I keep to myself, I generally greeted everyone when I came and sat in my corner.

Then there's this useless Cockatoo who drank free beer until his brains froze, first he kept talking about yahoo boys, how they dress a certain way, how they do all sorts to be rich, how they kill people to be rich, they both with soap gotten from herbalist, they don't go to work yet they're living fine, they have cars at a young age etc.

Now when you're talking and you don't call my name trust me I won't answer you. Even if it's obvious you're talking about me, and from all indication this man was talking about me, one my mom is dead, two I earn online and don't physically go to work, third I am not begging I'm doing okay, but I still didn't pay him any mind, then he indirectly started talking about how they don't respect people enough, he was so pained for some reason and condescending.

I just got up and went to a shop outside our family house, as I was buying something this weyrey came, I got what I wanted and turned to leave and that was when I felt it, waaam at my back, this guy slapped me on my back, then he asked me directly, didn't you see me? Don't you know I'm your uncle?

I lost it, and like a reflex I slapped him back hard it was a resounding slap, he staggered backwards, and my cousins held me, before I know it has spread that I just slapped uncle whatever his name is, what's painful is everyone blamed me, for being disrespectful and suddenly it didn't matter what he did, I'm somehow supposed to attone for it.

this man didn't know how I survived till adulthood, not even a penny of his went into my upbringing, I don't know why he felt I owe him respect and allegiance, even if I did, why does he have to go about it that way.

The fault is entirely yours.

You must give off a proud, arrogant "I no send you " image to your relatives or to some of them. Character is like smoke, you can't hide it.

I had problems with some entitled relations when growing up. My dad's oldest living sister was extremely entitled. To get the picture of what I'm saying, her daughter, my dad's niece, wrote to my when he was a struggling student in England, complaining that, had he not married, he would have been able to assist her. My mum came across the letter.

I bore a huge grudge against my dad's sister due to my mum's dislike of her. She caught unto my dislike for her and once asked me why did I hate her?

You need to stop giving off an "I don't owe you anything" attitude. It screams hostility.

Read Matthews 5:45-53.

Lexzeey:
In every family there's these uncles and aunts who knows nothing about you, they don't even know your name sometimes or how you survived into adulthood but feels you owe them allegiance whenever they see you.

first off I know it's an African thing to always respect people older than you, and before you crucify me I am also an adult now with his own adult life, I keep to myself and I don't force people to respect me as respect is earned.

A family member died and we all came back for it, coupled with the holidays, the whole extended family was present including some of those in diaspora, I'm an introvert so I keep to myself, I generally greeted everyone when I came and sat in my corner.

Then there's this useless Cockatoo who drank free beer until his brains froze, first he kept talking about yahoo boys, how they dress a certain way, how they do all sorts to be rich, how they kill people to be rich, they both with soap gotten from herbalist, they don't go to work yet they're living fine, they have cars at a young age etc.

Now when you're talking and you don't call my name trust me I won't answer you. Even if it's obvious you're talking about me, and from all indication this man was talking about me, one my mom is dead, two I earn online and don't physically go to work, third I am not begging I'm doing okay, but I still didn't pay him any mind, then he indirectly started talking about how they don't respect people enough, he was so pained for some reason and condescending.

I just got up and went to a shop outside our family house, as I was buying something this weyrey came, I got what I wanted and turned to leave and that was when I felt it, waaam at my back, this guy slapped me on my back, then he asked me directly, didn't you see me? Don't you know I'm your uncle?

I lost it, and like a reflex I slapped him back hard it was a resounding slap, he staggered backwards, and my cousins held me, before I know it has spread that I just slapped uncle whatever his name is, what's painful is everyone blamed me, for being disrespectful and suddenly it didn't matter what he did, I'm somehow supposed to attone for it.

this man didn't know how I survived till adulthood, not even a penny of his went into my upbringing, I don't know why he felt I owe him respect and allegiance, even if I did, why does he have to go about it that way.

Nice one, he'll learn to respect people 📌💯

You obviously came here for justification for your act of violence you didn't get in real life. If the man has a son, you have triggered an unnecessary beef.

You slapped your uncle,you think it’s a right thing to do,so why are you here seeking online justification and validation…

Continue the good work







But again,what’s life without proper bedmatics skills seff,I’m here to solve all your woes

Kobojunkie:
1.Oh! I was literally prepared to tell you that you were wrong until I read this here. He hit you? The dude literally had it coming!... You should have started with that. 🤣🤣🤣🤣

2. Na Africa you dey so, where entitlement is literally the culture. Try to avoid the wrong crowd as much as you can.

You were not about to tell him anything, you came here to say exactly what you said.

You need deliverance

LordIsaac:
You don't slap anyone under any circumstances besides self defense, not even your uncle! There are sane and legal means of resolving all conflicts! Go and apologize to him.

I support what you did, anybody that mess with you deal with him. Don't apologize to anybody.

grandstar:
The fault is entirely yours.

You must give off a proud, arrogant "I no send you " image to your relatives or to some of them. Character is like smoke, you can't hide it.

I had problems with some entitled relations when growing up. My dad's oldest living sister was extremely entitled. To get the picture of what I'm saying, her daughter, my dad's niece, wrote to my when he was a struggling student in England, complaining that, had he not married, he would have been able to assist her. My mum came across the letter.

I bore a huge grudge against my dad's sister due to my mum's dislike of her. She caught unto my dislike for her and once asked me why did I hate her?

You need to stop giving off an "I don't owe you anything" attitude. It screams hostility.

Read Matthews 5:45-53.

Of course I no send the man, you contributed nothing to my upbringing, schooling, even water you haven't sent me money for till I grew up and suddenly I owe you something, no, I'll remain arrogant, as far as I'm concerned I don't know him, let him respect it.

Double0h7:
Is he your maternal or paternal uncle?
Does he have sons?
Did you slap somebody’s father 🤣

Maternal, and weyrey has sons, yes I slapped their father.

martinskelly:
Op, you were wrong by all measure, your conscience is pricking you that is why you felt the need to bring it to a faceless forum.

That was not even a self-defense per se, you retaliated based on thoes initial comments made by your "supposedly" uncle which you claimed were not referring to you.

Of a truth, one thing i like our mind is that it feels, perceives, thinks, wills, and especially reasons.

There must be something your mind must have been saying that somehow or one way or the other aligns with what your "supposedly" uncle was saying hence the "slap" retaliation; I might be wrong though but the mind is there to testify.

You could have walked away and hold your peace but you listened to your mind in a hurry.

Just apologize since you seek advice.

Lol nothing is prickling me other than the fact that I feel restraint due to our African way of life, an older person is always right, first off the rubbish he kept saying did nothing to me, infact I like it when he talks endlessly of his failures and pains but refuses to call my name, that's fear, he followed me elsewhere and hit me on my back hence the slap, so yes no remorse at all.