₦airaland Forum

I cant remember the last time i had quality of sleep and this is the reason I am awake to write this, if you can see, the is almost 2am midnight...

In 2020, I got a car as a birthday gift from my brother. At that period, it was not that I could not afford a car, but I had another priority other than a car. Yeah, the car served me well until last year, when it kept giving me problem upon problem. The reality now is that I am not financially capable of getting a new car for myself, as I have health challenges that have drained me at the moment, and I pray God comes through fast.

So I recently called my brother to inform him about the current situation, and I told him I will be selling my car, but I need 3m to add to the car money to buy a nice, standard Nigerian used car to use in the meantime. I told him I have 1m naira cash, and if he can give me 1m or 1.5m to add to it, I can talk to one of my friends to get the balance, so he promised to give me the money by the end of January; however, I have spent the 1m I kept on medical again and can't meet up with my need.

The main problem I am having now is that I told him about it, and he said I should not worry, that he'll be coming to the country soon to spend 2 months, and the car he uses he'll drop it for me to use... This is where I get the issue, or call it mixed feelings.

He wanted to get a Benz, but I advised him to buy a Corolla since he'll be dropping it for me, but he said his standard can never use a Corolla. I told him to consider me since he promised to drop the car for me as my present condition would not make me able to maintain a Benz, and those who should help me might be calling me boss, and I would not want to be calling him for help or maintenance money every time.

I can maintain a Corolla on my own now, but this man does not see from my angle.

The truth is that I can't go out without a car, I can't use public transport at the moment, and I can't maintain Benz with this condition. And I also don't want to be a burden on anyone.

Please, how can I convince him to reason in my way? I am 100 percent sure he'll help if I ask, but I don't want to be asking him every time so I don't lose the little respect I get while still alive.

Modified...
Attached is the screenshot of what I asked him to get. Corolla 2011 or Camry Spider...

You all can see we had 1hr 57min of conversation and another 1hr 19mins to convince him but failed.

Iamajike:
➜He wanted to get a Benz, but I advised him to buy a Corolla since he'll be dropping it for me, but he said his standard can never use a Corolla. I told him to consider me since he promised to drop the car for me as my present condition would not make me able to maintain a Benz, and those who should help me might be calling me boss, and I would not want to be calling him for help or maintenance money every time.
I can maintain a Corolla on my own now, but this man does not see from my angle.
The truth is that I can't go out without a car, I can't use public transport at the moment, and I can't maintain Benz with this condition. And I also don't want to be a burden on anyone.
Please, how can I convince him to reason in my way? I am 100 percent sure he'll help if I ask, but I don't want to be asking him every time so I don't lose the little respect I get while still alive.

Have you made your argument to him then? Also, ask him if he would be OK with you selling the Benz after he has given it to you, so you can get yourself a Corolla. 🥱🥱🥱

Iamajike:
I cant remember the last time i had quality of sleep and this is the reason I am awake to write this, if you can see, the is almost 2am midnight...

You're only looking at it from one angle. The benz can also bring you high-value friends and people who may want to rent it for special occasions. Also, you'll start behaving and dresssing like someone who drives a benz thereby fooling the universe into making you someone who truly can afford a benz!
**Note: people generally don't give based on how poor or desperate you are. They give based on what you'll be happy to accept, what you're worth. They'll give a " benz man" more than they'll give a "Corolla man"!

Kobojunkie:
Have you made your argument to him then? Also, ask him if he would be OK with you selling the Benz after he has given it to you, so you can get yourself a Corolla. 🥱🥱🥱

See pessimism😅
Instead of advising him to try to keep the benz by any means necessary and use it to start behaving and thinking like a benz man!

In the current naija economy, if this is what is giving you sleepless nights, I don't know what to say.

Good luck.

What kind of maintenance does a Benz need that so so much different from that of a Corolla? I'm asking because I have never used a Benz before.

Second, I find it weird that you'd want him to deprive himself of the kind of car he wants to buy and use, just because he promised to give you the car after using it. That's like urging someone to buy food he's allergic to just because he promised to share his meal with you.

If I were in your shoes I'd let him decide what to do, since you've made your case to him once already.

Na wa o, someone is still awake by this time of the night because she prefers corolla to Benz while I'm awake because of hunger. Anyways may God answer our prayers irrespective of our level..

By the way he can't get both the corolla and Benz, let him give you the corolla while he keeps the Benz for himself

If he insists on getting and keeping the benz with with you after use, you should probably discuss with him if he would be ok with the option of selling the benz to get a corolla.

Live and let live

If benz is his choice, fine

Dont reduce him to what he is not because he has to help u.



Collect d benz


Stop making choices when u shd be quiet

She has car issues but "can't use public transport at the moment" dis no be winch so?

How you take dey go out? You no dey go work or school? The health issue did not stop you from going out abi? And im sure the car must have ac, right?

Clearly, dis na format

Advise him to rent a Benz when he comes in, instead of buying one. There are car rental companies in Nigeria.

Iamajike:
I cant remember the last time i had quality of sleep and this is the reason I am awake to write this, if you can see, the is almost 2am midnight...

In 2020, I got a car as a birthday gift from my brother. At that period, it was not that I could not afford a car, but I had another priority other than a car. Yeah, the car served me well until last year, when it kept giving me problem upon problem. The reality now is that I am not financially capable of getting a new car for myself, as I have health challenges that have drained me at the moment, and I pray God comes through fast.

So I recently called my brother to inform him about the current situation, and I told him I will be selling my car, but I need 3m to add to the car money to buy a nice, standard Nigerian used car to use in the meantime. I told him I have 1m naira cash, and if he can give me 1m or 1.5m to add to it, I can talk to one of my friends to get the balance, so he promised to give me the money by the end of January; however, I have spent the 1m I kept on medical again and can't meet up with my need.

The main problem I am having now is that I told him about it, and he said I should not worry, that he'll be coming to the country soon to spend 2 months, and the car he uses he'll drop it for me to use... This is where I get the issue, or call it mixed feelings.

He wanted to get a Benz, but I advised him to buy a Corolla since he'll be dropping it for me, but he said his standard can never use a Corolla. I told him to consider me since he promised to drop the car for me as my present condition would not make me able to maintain a Benz, and those who should help me might be calling me boss, and I would not want to be calling him for help or maintenance money every time.

I can maintain a Corolla on my own now, but this man does not see from my angle.

The truth is that I can't go out without a car, I can't use public transport at the moment, and I can't maintain Benz with this condition. And I also don't want to be a burden on anyone.

Please, how can I convince him to reason in my way? I am 100 percent sure he'll help if I ask, but I don't want to be asking him every time so I don't lose the little respect I get while still alive.

If he leaves the country,and hand the car over to you.. Re sell am,buy your corokpe and use the balance to chop. Tell him first that you can't metain the Benzima,that you need to get korokpe .. If you no tell am, quarrel fit go start.

Kobojunkie:
Have you made your argument to him then? Also, ask him if he would be OK with you selling the Benz after he has given it to you, so you can get yourself a Corolla. 🥱🥱🥱

I can't sell the Benz because he wanted to come often.

QuinQQ:
You're only looking at it from one angle. The benz can also bring you high-value friends and people who may want to rent it for special occasions. Also, you'll start behaving and dresssing like someone who drives a benz thereby fooling the universe into making you someone who truly can afford a benz!
**Note: people generally don't give based on how poor or desperate you are. They give based on what you'll be happy to accept, what you're worth. They'll give a " benz man" more than they'll give a "Corolla man"!

I get your point, but i also have to know my capacity and work with it.

Helpout12345:
In the current naija economy, if this is what is giving you sleepless nights, I don't know what to say.

Good luck.

Health issues brings sleepless night, but car.

Dtruthspeaker:
She has car issues but "can't use public transport at the moment" dis no be winch so?

How you take dey go out? You no dey go work or school? The health issue did not stop you from going out abi? And im sure the car must have ac, right?

Clearly, dis na format

I have car issues because I cant walk, I work from home and most of my going out is hospital which is 4 times in a week.

layzie:
Advise him to rent a Benz when he comes in, instead of buying one. There are car rental companies in Nigeria.

I think this is better

Iamajike:
I have car issues because I cant walk, I work from home and most of my going out is hospital which is 4 times in a week.

Oh dear.🫢 Sorry.

I think you just have to accept your brother's gift like that and prepare to do your best to maintain it. In fact, see it as a challenge, you just might be surprised.

QuinQQ:
See pessimism😅
Instead of advising him to try to keep the benz by any means necessary and use it to start behaving and thinking like a benz man!

What is pessimistic about that advice...


It's pragmatic advice. You can't tell people what to say.

What is the point of keeping the Benz "by all means" if he can't afford it?

They are people such mindset have ruined!

brain54:
What is pessimistic about that advice...


It's pragmatic advice. You can't tell people what to say.

What is the point of keeping the Benz "by all means" if he can't afford it?

They are people such mindset have ruined!

Pragmatic is pessimistic.
It is pessimistic because he can afford the benz - that's why it was sent to him. He THINKS he can't afford it based on human logic, but the universe does not go by human logic and pragmatism!
Benz can be used to make money in all sorts of ways without selling it.

Iamajike:
I get your point, but i also have to know my capacity and work with it.

U are underestimating your capacity.
Besides, u can use benz to make money in all sorts of ways. Get creative instead of taking the easy route of "I can't afford it"!

You didn’t specify the type and year of the Benz, and the same goes for the Corolla. That information is necessary to compare their maintenance costs.

QuinQ:
Pragmatic is pessimistic.
It is pessimistic because he can afford the benz - that's why it was sent to him. He THINKS he can't afford it based on human logic, but the universe does not go by human logic and pragmatism!
Benz can be used to make money in all sorts of ways without selling it.

Pragmatic isn't pessimism...


Pragmatic is what works in practice dealing with situations realistically and practically. It can never be pessimism that sees the downside to everything.


If he can't afford maintaining the Benz based on his earnings and logic of what he himself can afford then they is no need acquiring it based on some unrealistic or supernatural expectations of what is to come. That's practical thinking.


Have you thought that this person is unwell and probably not strong enough to do the extras of what you are suggesting? You are suggesting packaging and living a fake life.


What he is saying he just needs a car to enable him run around for his daily routines and activities that he can maintain not a business venture.


My major grouse with your comment is suggesting what the person you quoted ought to say. Even though he offered a very practical and pragmatic valid advice!

brain54:
Pragmatic isn't pessimism...


Pragmatic is what works in practice dealing with situations realistically and practically. It can never be pessimism that sees the downside to everything.


If he can't afford maintaining the Benz based on his earnings and logic of what he himself can afford then they is no need acquiring it based on some unrealistic or supernatural expectations of what is to come. That's practical thinking.


Have you thought that this person is unwell and probably not strong enough to do the extras of what you are suggesting? You are suggesting packaging and living a fake life.


What he is saying he just needs a car to enable him run around for his daily routines and activities that he can maintain not a business venture.


My major grouse with your comment is suggesting what the person you quoted ought to say. Even though he offered a very practical and pragmatic valid advice!

My comment was mainly to see it another way and to enliven the convo. We humans tend to be generally pessimistic and call it pragmatism and practical. We tend to grossly underestimate what we can do till we're put in a position where we have no choice but do it. If the only option this guy has is to keep the benz or, say, he'd die without it, he'd somehow magically device a way to afford it!

QuinQ:
My comment was mainly to see it another way and to enliven the convo. We humans tend to be generally pessimistic and call it pragmatism and practical. We tend to grossly underestimate what we can do till we're put in a position where we have no choice but do it. If the only option this guy has is to keep the benz or, say, he'd die without it, he'd somehow magically device a way to afford it!

Some people just want to live in their comfort zone bro...


Some people don't want to do anything extraordinary. We should also respect that choice and not push them to do more than they want or have the efforts to do.


If the Corolla is his comfort zone and he feels okay with it then don't push him to get a Benz which he isn't comfortable with and more importantly can't or doesn't want to struggle to maintain.

Like Is simple and less complex or complicated to some people- and the prefer it that way!

brain54:
Some people just want to live in their comfort zone bro...


Some people don't want to do anything extraordinary. We should also respect that choice and not push them to do more than they want or have the efforts to do.


If the Corolla is his comfort zone and he feels okay with it then don't push him to get a Benz which he isn't comfortable with and more importantly can't or doesn't want to struggle to maintain.

Like Is simple and less complex or complicated to some people- and the prefer it that way!

Speaking of comfort and comfort zones, see below

QuinQ:
Speaking of comfort and comfort zones, see below

Lol...


All these motivational speakers. Allow people to wallow in their comfort zones or traps as you call them.


People have a right to their choices in life. Don't push whatever expectations or how you want to live your life on them.

It's not by force. And by the way some people's comfort zone are some people's dream life.


You see it as trap another sees it as satisfaction. Allow them and stop pushing unrealistic motivational quotes!

brain54:
Some people just want to live in their comfort zone bro...


Some people don't want to do anything extraordinary. We should also respect that choice and not push them to do more than they want or have the efforts to do.


If the Corolla is his comfort zone and he feels okay with it then don't push him to get a Benz which he isn't comfortable with and more importantly can't or doesn't want to struggle to maintain.

Like Is simple and less complex or complicated to some people- and the prefer it that way!

It is our job to push each other out of comfort zones. How do you think this cell phone and internet you're using got invented. I can assure they were NOT invented by people chilling, enjoying comfort. They were invented by people pushed out of their comfort zones by someone or something!
Having said that, see below!😅

QuinQ:
It is our job to push each other out of comfort zones. How do you think this cell phone and internet you're using got invented. I can assure they were NOT invented by people chilling, enjoying comfort. They were invented by people pushed out of their comfort zones by someone or something!
Having said that, see below!😅

Not everyone is interested in inventing anything...


Those who want to invent will invent and those that want to chill in their comfort zone will do just that.


You can't push a person who wants to chill to invent. Invention by itself is an act that involves curiosity. You cant push people to be curious.


People have different values and meaning to life. The Benz you are pushing someone to get is meaningless to someone who just wants to be mobile and sees a vehicle as just a means of mobility.


My statistics lecturer used to say he saw no point in wearing expensive designer watches since his primary reason to own one was just to tell time. So he would flaunt his "cheap" watch proudly.


You can't fault his decision. It's what he wants so respect that. You can't force him to buy a watch he can't afford when he probably holds no value or significance to owning one in the name of pleasing people like you


By the way you now that is motivating people how many things have you invented? for all we know now you are one lowlife struggling with data and just your phone in some dingy room somewhere you call your comfort zone.


The irony is the person you are motivating might actually be doing better compared to you in reality or real life


Person say I want what I can afford to maintain you say no take what you can't maintain...all in the name of motivational speaker. When things start going south for him now you will not be there to unmotivate what you motivated. You would leave him to struggle with the challenges alone. It's not like the Benz holds any much significant more value to him!

brain54:
Not everyone is interested in inventing anything...


Those who want to invent will invent and those that want to chill in their comfort zone will do just that.


You can't push a person who wants to chill to invent. Invention by itself is an act that involves curiosity. You cant push people to be curious.


People have different values and meaning to life. The Benz you are pushing someone to get is meaningless to someone who just wants to be mobile and sees a vehicle as just a means of mobility.


My statistics lecturer used to say he saw no point in wearing expensive designer watches since his primary reason to own one was just to tell time. So he would flaunt his "cheap" watch proudly.


You can't fault his decision. It's what he wants so respect that. You can't force him to buy a watch he can't afford when he probably holds no value or significance to owning one in the name of pleasing people like you!

You miss the point. The issue is not what he wants. The issue is what I'd advise him to do. We all know what he wants. And by the way, people who invented and worked on perfecting cell phone and internet left their comfortable beds and went to work to.get it done!!

You want your brother to buy a corrola,just because he wants to leave it for you..Mr man you get problem oo..Let him buy it then you can sell it to get the Corolla..No Dey do like nkapi..